by Jon Chaisson
*
Denysia....
My little sis.
Hmmm....You know, I've been trying to figure out a way to talk to you about this, to try and find a good time, but I never seemed to get there. I won't even bother with excuses, Den, you deserve that much. So right now I'm going with my gut instincts, saying the truest words I can. I'm speaking within you, Denysia. There are no lies here. There never have been, and there never will be.
I know you are sleeping right now, and I am whispering this so I won't wake you. I can only hope that your soul, or your subconscious hears this and retains it. I'm in my bed right now, right down the hall from you, staring at the shadows on the ceiling, and I pray that you won't be scared by everything that went on today. I meant to ask you what that soul had said to you, but you looked uncomfortable in bringing it up, so I won't push you. When you're ready, please, please talk to me, okay?
Well. Umm.
Den, you see, what happened today...at the church, and with the conversations I’d had with the Mendaihu we’re working with…I just couldn’t help but think of Mum and Dad. I know it happened five years ago...I really don't know how much of it you remember, or even want to remember. Goddess knows I try not to remember it at all, though I know eventually I'll come to terms with it. I want to, but it’s just so hard…
So let me say this:
Mum and Dad died trying to save us, Denni. I know I told you a version of this, but I never told you the whole story. It’s true they were over at that apartment at Branden Hill Park, trying to lure out a violent antialienist, who had kidnapped two kids, a boy and a girl. How do I know this? Classified files, kid. Both the ARU and the BMPD shut this case down damn quick, while I recuperated from the shock. Later on I had access — unofficial access, mind you, thanks to a few people who shall remain nameless for now. Suffice it to say I’m indebted to them for giving me the truth when I needed it most. Hell, I was barely able to process it, but you know? I wouldn’t have had it any other way. I’m glad they told me when they did, instead of keeping me in the dark, throwing lies or half-truths at me like everyone else.
Sorry, I'm getting distracted. Now...
Those two kids? Boy was eight, the girl was ten. I don't remember the names, but that's not really important right now. What is important, is that this antialienist? He was a Reality Seer. Sort of like a soulsenser, only they can see the multiple outcomes of any given action. Think of Alec, he's a profiler. A profiler’s aim is to find the one most possible outcome, while a reality seer looks for the largest number of possible outcomes.
So...um...
So these kids...apparently he was convinced — and said as much to Mum and Dad when they accosted him, according to transcripts — that the kids were both future Warriors of the One of All Sacred. Uh...well, to keep it short, Warriors are Mendaihu soldiers whose only role is to protect the One at all costs in both his or her physical and spiritual forms. At those kids' ages, one can never really tell what they'll become. A skilled Mendaihu, maybe, but a Warrior? It’s possible, but the odds are astronomical. Kids are still too malleable at that age. They can go either way, become anything at all.
So...Mum and Dad confront this guy, try to get the kids out, you know? It's a standard practice, being a Mendaihu -- get the innocent out, sacrificing yourself if you have to. Only this guy...
...
...sorry.
...this guy. He, uh. He...he kills them. I'll spare you the long version, Den. The poor kids...he...he, um...
...
...damn. I'm sorry. It still bothers the hell out of me, kid. Just bear with me.
He...he, um...so he takes their lives…and…Mum witnesses it all. She can’t do a damn thing because she wasn’t in range to stop him, but she was able to see and sense the whole thing, record it. Guy’s completely lost it at this point, he doesn’t give a shit what he does anymore. And he knows Mum is there, and calls her out. He challenges Mum, he challenges her to a fight, see? A fight to the...to the death.
Do you understand now, Den?
This guy. He was Shenaihu. A damn near invulnerable Shenaihu. A nuhm’ndah Shenaihu, like those from twenty-five years ago. Like the ones who were at the church today. Scary strong. Relentless. Without moral. You’d want to be the hell away from them as quickly as possible. So he, uh. Mum wasn’t able to retreat quickly enough. He takes Mum up to...he…pushed her through two floors and through the roof.
…
She…um…she lost consciousness quick, Den. I'm sure she didn't suffer much.
...
Dad, well. Heh. You know him. He'd withstand a nuclear blast if it meant saving his family. That's the kind of guy, the kind of ARU officer he was. And he witnessed all that, and he was fucking pissed! He takes the bastard into the Light, kid. Can you believe it? Didn’t even think twice. Who would have known our own father was able to Lightwalk like the highest trained Mendaihu could? Goddess…! He took the guy there, and next thing you know, they're both high above the city. I don't know if it was Dad's sense of irony or sick sense of humor, but he re-emerges above the Mirades Tower, and lets them fall. Just high enough to kill them both.
Weird thing, Dad was never found.
Huh. Yeah, I know. Stupid freakin' ending to a story, right? So damn stupid and pointless...but it makes sense, you know? Now that I'm past the, uh, the soulhealing. I understand it now. He was protecting both of us, Den. Whoever that bastard was that killed our parents, knew them as Mendaihu. They sacrificed themselves for us, Den. They wanted us to grow up unafraid and unscathed. If and when we came into our Mendaihu traits, we would experience them as they truly are: as energies of love and compassion. If we had become involved in these Shenaihu back then...who knows what would have happened?
Me? Well. I think I've adjusted to these traits by now. Sheila figured me out soon after the fact. Farraway knows. Poe? Maybe, maybe not, he’s never said anything about it. I can never tell with him anyway, but I think he’d understand. I'm certain those two Mendaihu we're working with know by now. I think Nick might know, but you can never tell with him. What they don't know is that I've been using it for some time now, even when I don't admit to myself that I am.
Only tonight have I finally fully accepted this truth, when I saw it in your eyes, and felt it in your hands. I can only hope that you do better than I did, Denysia.
Heh.
Do you know why I just called you that? That's your adopted Mendaihu name. Mum used to call you that when she cradled you as a baby. I remember Dad calling me Karinna all the time. It’s a reminder to let us know that we’re all in it together. That there are other spirits out there that will keep us anchored so we don’t lose ourselves.
So hey — just keep all this in your heart, okay? But do me a favor. Don't let it eat at you, not like I did. We're Mendaihu, Den. We’re too strong for that. We won't act on revenge. Mum and Dad may be dead, but their souls live on. Remember that, most of all. Their souls live on, eternally.
I love you, kid. I truly love you with all that I am, and I’m always there for you.
Sleep tight. Sorry if I woke you up.
