The Open Road

by Quinn Loftis

  Samantha had not said a word the entire time. She didn’t know what to say. She could see Jason trembling all over. Sam reached down and took his hand again, giving it a gentle squeeze.

  “What about my wife, my daughters? Did you see them?”

  Tom shook his head. “I didn’t really. It happened so fast. That car … I don’t even know how to describe it. I thought I might could see someone over on the passenger side, but it was all a tangle in there. You couldn’t make heads or tails of it. And that back part… It was just flattened. You couldn’t see nothin’ back there.” Mr. Williams paused. “I’m sorry, son,” he said finally.

  Jason didn’t raise his eyes. He just kept staring at the patch of fresh grass on the ground.

  “Young lady,” said Martha to Samantha, “maybe the three of us better head back inside. Check on that coffee, give Jason a moment.”

  “Good idea,” said Tom. “Jason, you just take all the time you need, son. We’ll be inside if you need anything.”

  “You good?” Sam asked Jason. Slowly he turned and looked at her. She couldn’t explain what she saw in his face. A fierce storm of emotions warred in Jason’s bloodshot eyes. She held his gaze for what seemed like an eternity. Finally, he nodded his head.

  “I’ll be alright. It’s time. I have to do this myself.”

  Samantha nodded. She could feel her own eyes rimmed with tears now. She gave his hand one last squeeze and walked with Tom and Martha back into the house.

  * * *

  Jason could still feel his body quivering. He thought for a second his legs would give out. He knelt down in the grass before they could. For a long while he just sat there on his knees. He plucked at the grass, saying nothing.

  “We did it,” Jason finally managed to say. His voice was whisper. “We finally made it to all fifty states. It’s been quite a ride. And I’ve felt you with me. I know you’ve been with me every step of the way.” He went quiet again.

  “I wasn’t sure how I’d feel when I got here. I knew it’d be tough, but … I didn’t know it’d be this tough. I was hoping, maybe, somewhere along the way, I might be able to let you go. I thought if I drove far enough, or if I saw enough, or if I did I enough, I might actually forget about you. That was silly. I know now I can never forget you, and I don’t want to. But I think, perhaps, now I can say goodbye properly.

  “I know I’ve told you this before, but I’d give anything to have you back. I’d give anything to look into your eyes again, to run my fingers through your hair or to smell your neck. What I wouldn’t give just to take you to the movies again. To share popcorn with you. To hold your hand one more time.

  “What I wouldn’t give to hold our girls again. To toss them up into the air and hear them giggle or see them run across the backyard. What I wouldn’t pay for one more pretend tea party.”

  Jason began to sob. For the longest time, he just sat there, his tears falling into the grass. Few cars passed, and those that did mustn’t have been able to see him sitting down in the ditch because no one stopped to ask if he was okay.

  “But I can’t have you back, I know that,” Jason whispered. “And if I thought for a second I might be able to see you on the other side, I’d kill myself. I’d stop at the first pawn shop I came to, buy a gun, and blow my brains out. But I don’t know how all that works, and I don’t know if I’d see you. But most of all, I know you wouldn’t want that. I know you would have me live. I bet you would have me happy again.

  “So, I’m going to do that. I’m going to keep on living. And I’m not going to forget you. I’m going to talk to you every day. First thing in the morning, I’m going to tell you and Hannah and Chloe that I love you. Just once a day. Then, after that, I’m going to live my life, just like you would want me to. I don’t have any idea what that’s going to look like, but I’m going to do my best.”

  Jason reached around on the ground until he found a large rock. He used it to dig a small hole in the earth. Then he pulled out the lilac, kissed it, and placed it into the hole. Next, he removed the crumpled paper and unfolded it. He read out loud.

  * * *

  Afoot and light-hearted, I take to the open road,

  Healthy, free, the world before me,

  The long brown path before me, leading wherever I choose.

  * * *

  Henceforth I ask not good-fortune—I myself am good fortune;

  Henceforth I whimper no more, postpone no more, need nothing,

  Strong and content, I travel the open road . . .

  . . . From this hour, freedom! From this hour I ordain myself loosed of limits and imaginary lines,

  Going where I list, my own master, total and absolute,

  Listening to others, and considering well what they say,

  Pausing, searching, receiving, contemplating,

  Gently, but with undeniable will, divesting myself of the holds that would hold me . . .

  . . . I inhale great draughts of space;

  The east and the west are mine, and the north and the south are mine.

  * * *

  I am larger, better than I thought;

  I did not know I held so much goodness.

  All seems beautiful to me;

  I can repeat over to men and women, You have done such good to me,

  I would do the same to you.

  * * *

  I will recruit for myself and you as I go;

  I will scatter myself among men and women as I go;

  I will toss the new gladness and roughness among them;

  Whoever denies me, it shall not trouble me;

  Whoever accepts me, he or she shall be blessed, and shall bless me.

  * * *

  “Bethany, when I first read this poem to America, I had no idea what it meant, and I had no idea why you loved it so much. But now I think I might. From this hour, my love … freedom.” Jason folded the paper, placed it atop the flower in the hole, and covered it with earth. He patted the dirt softly, leaned down and kissed it, then rose and walked slowly back to the house.

  Samantha met him at the door, followed by Tom and Martha.

  “It’s time to go,” Jason told Samantha. “Mr and Mrs. Williams, thanks so much for everything.”

  “You are welcome here anytime, Jason,” said Martha.

  “And you should really meet my son-in-law sometime,” said Tom. “He’s the one who saved your life.”

  “I will do that,” said Jason. “It’s a promise.”

  Jason exchanged contact information with the Williams, and then he and Samantha returned to the RV. Tom and Martha stood in the yard, waving as Jason backed carefully out of the driveway. As the vehicle crept out into the road, Jason cast one quick glance back to the new disturbed earth in the ditch. He nodded then put the motorhome in drive and headed for home.

  Chapter 27

  Billowy clouds took turns shielding Samantha from the mid-May sunshine as she sat on the outdoor patio of The Funky Chicken Bar and Grill in downtown Memphis, a restaurant specializing in live music and boneless chicken wings. Her Algebra I book was open along with her laptop and two notebooks. Pens, highlighters, and a calculator were scattered across the table. A brown-and-white bulldog lay on her sandaled feet snoring, drool from his open mouth dripping onto her toes.

  When am I ever going to use this crap? She tried, again unsuccessfully, to add the polynomial on the paper in front of her. A low growl escaped her throat as she looked up the answer in the back of the book and tried to figure out what she was doing wrong. Absentmindedly, she fingered the silver locket hanging on a slender chain around her neck. Inside the locket hid a pressed purple lilac. The final flower from an original group of fifty.

  She and Jason had decided to settle permanently in Memphis after Jason had finished his trip. Memphis was close enough to Little Rock that he could visit his family for a day trip but wouldn’t remind him daily of the life he and Bethany had once had. And it was far enough from Roanoke that Samantha felt safe Derek would
never find her. Charity had called a few days after she and Brent returned from their honeymoon and told Sam that Derek had finally been arrested. But Sam knew he wouldn’t stay incarcerated forever. Eventually, he would get out. When he did, she would be long gone. She doubted he’d have the initiative to travel as far as Memphis to find her.

  She started as someone poked her in the ribs.

  “How’s the studying going?” Jason asked, placing a fresh Diet Coke down in front of her. Sam had been so intent on cramming for her Algebra final, she hadn’t even noticed Jason creeping up behind her.

  “About as well as Frisco is doing as a watchdog. Obviously, anyone could have sneaked up on me and he wouldn’t have bothered to even give a warning bark.”

  “I don’t know… Your toes look pretty safe.” He leaned down and gave Samantha a peck on the lips.

  “Have time for lunch?” she asked.

  “No, I’ve got a meeting with clients in a few minutes. I just wanted to stop by and check on you.”

  “Thanks.” She beamed. “Hopefully, seeing you will give me the last bit of strength I need to finish out these stupid finals.”

  “Don’t worry about it. You’ll do fine. Before you know it, you’ll be walking across that stage with your degree in hand. And I have no doubt you’ll get into law school and make a great lawyer one day. Eventually, you’ll probably kick Brent’s ass in court, and we can all laugh at him.”

  “I think Brent is going into corporate law. I’m going to be a prosecutor. We would never meet in court.”

  “Well, if you did, I’m sure you’d kick his ass,” said Jason.

  “Thanks. My last final is at 6:00 p.m. today. Are we all set for tomorrow?”

  “The RV is fueled up, oil changed, tires checked, ready to go.”

  “Great,” she said. “I appreciate you taking me. I need to get away after these exams. It’s been so long since I’ve actually had to study anything. I wasn’t exactly an A student in high school to begin with. They didn’t make it any easier in college. My brain is scrambled.”

  “Nothing a few margaritas in New Orleans won’t fix.”

  “What time do the newlyweds arrive?” Samantha asked.

  “I think Brent said in the afternoon. I’ll have to text him and find out the exact time so we can pick them up at the airport.”

  “Hopefully, they won’t be too disgustingly in love. They’ve been married for over six months already.”

  “Surely, the honeymoon period is over by now,” he agreed.

  Samantha countered, “But Charity usually milks her birthday for an entire month, at least. Who knows how long she gets to play the honeymoon card.”

  “And her bachelorette party was a four-day binger in Las Vegas,” added Jason. “The girl likes her celebrations.”

  “I think I recall something about that weekend,” said Samantha. “Oh, yeah, I met a really hot guy there. He was so fun.”

  “You tell that bastard if I ever see him, he’s a dead man,” Jason threatened.

  “I’m not sure you could take him.” She giggled. “In addition to being hot, he’s also kinda tough. He’s got big strong muscles.” She grabbed his tie and pulled him back down to her level, placing a long kiss on his lips.

  “Okay, fine,” said Jason. “But tell him he can only have you in the mornings before noon. You’re kind of a bear during that time anyway.”

  “I’m sure he’ll appreciate any moments he gets to spend with me.”

  “Of that, I have no doubt,” said Jason before kissing her again.

  * * *

  “Seems like we were just here,” said Jason, pulling off the road onto the white gravel driveway.

  “It’s only been four months,” said Samantha.

  “But, in some ways, it also feels like an eternity,” Jason said.

  “I feel that way, too,” agreed Sam. “It’s almost like the past four months have gone by in the blink of an eye, but, at the same time, it feels like we’ve done so much together.”

  He laughed. “Uh, we have. We moved you to a different state. Got you enrolled in school, found you a part-time job, and found us both apartments. I moved all my stuff up from Little Rock and then I had to find a job here too. I’d say that was a pretty busy fall.”

  “Do you think I’m a coward for running away from Roanoke?”

  “I think you’re damn brave for making a new start. Not very many people could have done that.”

  “Thanks,” she replied. “Let’s go say hi to Tom and Martha.”

  The elderly couple sat rocking on a front porch swing. Another man, younger, in his mid-thirties, sat on the porch steps. They all rose when they saw the RV arrive.

  Jason and Samantha climbed down from the large vehicle. Before Sam shut the door, a fat bulldog came hurtling out of the passenger side door to land ungracefully on the ground.

  “Jason and Samantha, so good to see you again,” said Martha before hugging them both tightly. “And who is this doll?” she asked, bending down to pet Frisco, who promptly flopped onto his back to accept a tummy rub.

  “That’s Frisco,” said Sam. “He’s okay if you can handle the dog slobber.”

  “Howdy, young man,” said Tom, shaking Jason’s hand. “This here’s Gary, my son-in-law, the one I was telling you about. He’s the real hero.”

  Jason took the man’s outstretched hand. The man was well-built and wore a flannel shirt, blue jeans, and a brown cap. “Not exactly sure what to say,” said Jason. “Thanks for saving my life. That sounds kinda weird.”

  “Hey,” Gary held up two callused hands. “Anybody would have done it. Just sorry we couldn’t have done more.”

  “Well, I appreciate what you did do. Gave me a second chance at life, anyway.”

  “You going down to the crash site?” Tom asked.

  Jason thought for a long moment. “No, I don’t think I need to. We are just passing through. On our way to meet some friends in New Orleans.”

  Martha put her arm around Jason’s shoulders. “There’s something you should see, Jason.” Her eyes were twinkling. “C’mon, we’ll all take a stroll down there. It’ll probably do you two some good to stretch your legs.”

  “Okay,” said Jason reluctantly. They all marched across the Williams’ huge front yard. As soon as they reached the ditch, Samantha gasped. They hadn’t noticed as they’d pulled in the driveway, approaching the Williams’ homestead from the north, but now they could see, stretching for some twenty yards to the south, a swath of lilacs growing in the ditch. Three distinct colors could be seen: purple, blue, and white.

  Jason’s mouth dropped open. “But, that’s impossible.”

  “They came up volunteer about a month ago,” said Gary. “Damndest thing I ever saw.”

  “Almost like they knew you were coming,” said Martha.

  “That’s … amazing.” Tears began to flow freely from Jason’s eyes.

  Samantha couldn’t stop her own tears as she touched her locket. She and Jason walked hand in hand down into the ditch. They knelt and examined the flowers. Neither spoke for a long time. Sam picked one flower of each color. Eventually, she rose, turned to Jason, took his head in her arms, squeezed tightly, and then kissed him on the forehead. She walked back up to the group of Tom, Martha, and Gary, and they turned to walk back toward the house, leaving Jason alone. He stayed for some time before he, too, returned to the house … strong and content.

  Epilogue

  “Mom, what are these flowers?” Seven-year-old Jackson O’Neal lifted the dusty picture frame from the back of the mantle where it sat surrounded by an army of family photos. Inside the frame sat three pressed lilacs of different colors. It was Friday morning, almost time for Samantha to drop Jackson off at school on her way to work at the Shelby County Prosecutor’s Office. Jason had already left for work. On Fridays, he liked to leave a few minutes early so he could stop and buy doughnuts for the staff that worked in his investment banking office.

  “What flowers?�
� Samantha asked as she walked into the den from the kitchen.

  Jackson held up the picture frame.

  “Ah, those flowers,” she said approaching him. “That is a very long story.” She looked down at her watch for a second. “One that cannot be properly told without this.” From the other end of the mantle she retrieved an old snow globe. Then she pulled her laptop from her attaché case and opened it. “Have a seat.” She patted the couch. Jackson sat beside her.

  “Uh, shouldn’t we be leaving for school?” he asked. Samantha only smiled.

  “It won’t kill you to be late for school. I’m not due in court until this afternoon. I can manage a morning off. This is important.”

  She could see Jackson was intrigued. Sam watched his intrigue turn to confusion when she turned on the computer and navigated to the website where he usually watched online videos of people playing games. She typed in the search bar, “Jason’s Lost His Mind—North American Tour.” A familiar face popped up on the screen.

  “I’m sure you recognize that guy,” Sam said.

  “Dad? He looks so young.” Samantha heard wonder in the boy’s voice.

  Samantha laughed. “Wait until you see your aunt, Charity, in some of these videos.”

  “What is this?” Jackson asked.

  “This, my son, is how our family’s story was written … on the open road.”

  The End

  About the Authors

  * * *

  Quinn Loftis is a multi-award winning author of more than 20 novels, including the USA Today Bestseller, Fate and Fury. Once upon a time, she was a nurse, but God had other things in store for her. In 2011 Quinn published her first novel, Prince of Wolves, and the rest, as they say, is history. She gives all glory to God for her success because He is the one who made her. She is blessed to be married to her best friend for over 19 years and they have three boys, two dogs and a cat that wants to take over the world.