Soulless: An Enemies-to-Lovers Romance (Starcrossed Lovers Trilogy Book 2)

by Jade West

  FUCK. IT. Fuck the craziness.

  I wandered around the yard, still hoping to talk some sense into myself. The grounds around the house looked pretty wild, and damn beautiful with it. I doubted Lucian was nearly as good a gardener as he was a pasta maker. I couldn’t imagine him ever taking active care of the space. I’d never really had a garden, not of my own. Unless I was with family on outings or at home in the compound, I’d been living holed up in NYC for most of my adult life. There was nothing I could call a garden to tend, or turn into something I wanted.

  I stepped out onto a patch of grass and spun myself around, truly soaking it all in. There were big sprawling trees and plenty of scope to make this space into something truly amazing. I could do that. I could learn to. I could read some books, and watch some vids, and get a grip of what would work and where. I cursed myself again as I thought it through. It was nothing but more craziness that would never happen. I needed to stop living such a stupid dream.

  I kept the front door open as I made myself some pancakes for breakfast, unable to face shutting the world out. I ventured out onto the lawn with my plate, loving the breeze in my face as I munched my food with a smile. Yeah, I liked it out here. I really damn well liked it.

  I didn’t want to watch anymore shit TV, not with so much better outside to be looking at. I wrapped up warm in one of Lucian’s designer sweaters from his wardrobe, then tried to find some gardening equipment in the garage. It surprised me to find a set of spades and trowels ready and waiting. Maybe he did have a tiny streak of gardener in him. Maybe I’d even find out.

  I was outside on the nearest flower bed on the lawn, dredging up weeds with a trowel when I finally condemned myself for what I was doing. Surely I couldn’t work on Lucian Morelli’s countryside garden? But I could. I did.

  In one of the most bizarre and surreal choices of all time, I, Elaine Constantine of the Constantine family line, turned her back on escaping from the Morelli monster’s backwater prison and tended his goddamn garden instead.

  Go fucking figure.

  28

  Lucian

  I was usually well at work at my desk before the office day started, not sitting in a meeting room suite with my father, discussing my failures as a Morelli heir. His eyes were piercing as I stared across the table. Suspicious. I knew Trenton Alto had been a snake reporting back every little whisper he heard on the NYC corruption grapevine. Thank fuck Elaine had been crazy enough to condemn the Power Brothers in my stead.

  “Another lapse of a morning,” he seethed. “Where the hell have you been going? I’m well aware you haven’t been in central.”

  I leaned back in my seat, eyes firm on his. “I’ve been busy.”

  “Busy chasing down the Constantines?”

  I didn’t understand his logic. “Excuse me?”

  “Are you tracking down more of the Constantine bitches now that Elaine has been taken already?”

  “Is that what Alto told you?”

  He leaned back in his seat to match me. Two Morellis in the same pose, staring across at each other with the same scowl on their faces.

  “Alto said it’s likely. He heard people are chasing after Tinsley. He thought it may well be you and not the Power Brothers. They wouldn’t be chasing her so soon.”

  A wave of annoyance at Trenton twisted in my gut. I could have throttled him right there and then. Still, I should be grateful. The accusation had fuck all of a Morelli criminality to it compared to the true extent of my crimes.

  “I’m being serious now, boy,” Father said. “You leave the Constantines the fuck alone. We team up with the Power Brothers or we do nothing at all. No fucking thing. No digging, no chasing, no attempting to tear them down.”

  Part of me wanted to laugh in his face and say he had no idea what the hell I’d been doing. Instead I used the opportunity to use my truths as my strengths.

  “I’ve had fuck all to do with Tinsley Constantine,” I told him. “I can assure you of that.”

  He paused for long seconds, our eyes fixed firm and cold on each other’s.

  “Good. You’d better keep it that way.” He leaned in closer. “Seemingly, you’ve had fuck all to do with Morelli Holdings, either.”

  “I’ve been busy on plenty of things.”

  “Hanging out with your buddies on the BDSM club circuit doesn’t cut it. It’s hardly an investment worth tending to.”

  It struck me in that moment just how distant I’d grown from my family. He was referring to a point in the past where I’d been heavily involved with Violent Delights and enjoying the club along with Clark Ventana, happily focused on indulging my thrills with the bitches in there, and just how much I could buy them for.

  “Are you done with me today?” I asked him. “I’ve got more important things to be doing than justifying my BDSM interests.”

  I knew there was a whole world of questions in his throat that he wanted to lash out at me, but he didn’t. Our lack of closeness had destroyed any bridges into my privacy he’d ever managed to build.

  He gestured to the door, as though this was still his kingdom and not mine. I was already up and leaving when he spoke again.

  “I mean it, son. You go anywhere near any more of the Constantines without Power Brothers’ approval and I’ll make an example of you. You’ll wish you’d never been born to the family name.”

  It was another threat in the same vein, the Constantine vein. The vein that was turning me into the biggest fool I’d ever known. Still, it didn’t even touch me. There was more. His jaw was as gritted as I’d ever seen it as he gave me the ultimatum.

  “It’s your choice, here and now. You step up to the plate here at Holdings, or you step down until you can sort your shit out. Your call. Holdings or out. Fuck off overseas to play your bullshit games, or hang out at your shitty club all you like, but don’t make a mockery of Holdings. Seamus and Duncan can take hold of the reins easily enough until you get your damn act together.”

  The rage sprung up in me. Seamus and Duncan could kiss my sorry ass.

  “I’m not going anywhere,” I hissed, and I meant it. In that moment, I fucking meant it.

  I stepped out of there, and the very idea of handing my responsibilities over to those pieces of shit was enough to enrage me – except it was surpassed as I began the trek to my top-level domain. Surpassed by a wave of priorities that made me shiver. I couldn’t deny it anymore. I had to start speaking my truths to myself as well as other people.

  I wasn’t interested in what my father was threatening, or what was happening around me in this place, or what I should be interested in between the Power Brothers and the Constantine pieces of shit I’d hated my whole life. I should be celebrating the conflict and focusing everything I had on teaming up with the idiots who’d help me destroy them, but I wasn’t. All I was damn well thinking about was Elaine back at my shithole of a retreat and just how much I wanted to hurt the men who’d torn her apart with their seedy games.

  The truth was a hard one to accept, and it took my breath before I made it back to the elevator. I’d never been floored by emotion in my life. I’d never known such a rush of conflict, never mind how to fucking deal with it.

  I forced myself into the elevator and selected the top floor. It was the slowest ascent of my life.

  I hated myself as I faced up to the impossibility of what lay ahead of me. I couldn’t walk the line between Holdings and Elaine. There was no way I could juggle the two of them – not with the lengthy journeys from Peak to NYC and back again every day. I couldn’t indulge the temptress and my wants for her and still maintain my control over the Morelli empire. It was impossible. The whole thing was fucking impossible.

  It was time to do it. I had to make my choice.

  Upstairs or downstairs? Holdings or Elaine? Sitting back at my desk and stepping back up to my position, or telling my father I was stepping down until I could sort myself out?

  It should have been Holdings. Of course, it should’ve b
een Holdings. I should’ve turned my back on the bitch and finished her off for good without a backwards glance. I could take that sweet virginity of hers and revel in her pain and dismiss her into the trash where she belonged as a Constantine. Only it wasn’t Holdings I wanted. It wasn’t upstairs.

  I stopped the elevator halfway up.

  Fuck. FUCK. I shouldn’t do this. I shouldn’t even be contemplating making the most dumbass decision of my whole fucking life, but I was. I did.

  I was cursing myself and everything I stood for as I pressed the button.

  29

  Elaine

  When Lucian’s car pulled up in the driveway, I was still outside with a trowel in the flowerbed. My heart did a terrible leap as I realized just what the hell I’d done by staying in this place and risking my life every second I was around him, but I’d done it. My decision had already been made.

  The sun was still high in the sky, the afternoon barely half done when he’d parked up in the garage and was heading to the front door with his keys in his hand. I could have hidden in the bushes and pretended I’d already run away from him, but I didn’t. I was every bit the utter fool with a stupid crush on a monster when I called out to him from the garden.

  “Over here, honey!” I waved my trowel in the air.

  The monster stopped and started, fixing me in his piercing eyes as he stomped in my direction. I carried on digging the soil and pulling the weeds out, like it wasn’t the most insane decision I’d ever made and I wasn’t kidnapped in a hole of a place belonging to my arch enemy.

  “What the hell are you doing? Are you out of your fucking mind?”

  His tone was blunt, but it wasn’t aggressive. His eyes were wild but not full of hate as he stared down at me.

  I shrugged. “Probably.”

  “Probably?”

  “Yeah, probably. Maybe I do just want you to kill me? Otherwise I’d have been running back to Bishop’s Landing like a girl who wants to be snorting coke and hating her life every single minute of it.”

  He couldn’t hold back a smirk.

  “You’re doing alright on that. I’d have expected a lot more wallowing and begging on the coke front.”

  Yeah, I would too. I’d surprised myself there. I was firmly on the same page as him on expecting the wallowing and begging for lines of powder. That and bottles of fizz.

  Lucian tossed his keys in his hand as he scoped out the pile of weeds I’d been digging up. I did a silly little bow from my knees and waved the trowel in the air like some kind of superstar as I spoke again.

  “Yes, I know, I know. It seems I am quite the capable gardener, doesn’t it? Despite me not being a success on the salami-slicing front.”

  He tried to scowl, but it didn’t look authentic.

  “There’s you with that sassy mouth again. You should be a more convincing kidnap victim, you know. Maybe then I’d take pity on you and keep you like a pet.”

  I found my bitchy tone at that. “Screw you and your pity. I’ll never bathe in pity, no matter how rough it gets. Kill me, or fuck me, or both, whatever, just keep your pity to yourself, please. I’m no pet for anyone. Not outside of the bedroom anyway.”

  We were both staring at each other, and the Morelli-Constantine hate should have been bristling as strongly as ever. He should have been dragging me inside and telling me I’d missed my escape chances and more fool me, and I should be cursing myself for ever considering staying in this damn place, but we weren’t doing any of it, just damn well staring.

  “I left the door unlocked, I’m guessing?” he asked me. “That’s what happens when you sneak into my bed overnight and fuck my alarm over. Maybe you should try it more often.”

  “I didn’t fuck your alarm over. You were sleeping like a baby and didn’t get up in time.”

  “Regardless. I rushed out and left the door unlocked, did I?”

  I shrugged like it was no big deal.

  “I noticed it on my way to get some breakfast. I’ve had plenty of time to get the hell away from here.”

  “Yes,” he said. “You have. So why didn’t you?”

  I didn’t really have an answer for that. Not one that made sense. I couldn’t tell him that the thought of leaving him and this place gave me a sick pang in my stomach and nothing but a sense of dread at walking away. I could hardly say that I’d stayed wrapped up in his bed covers for hours after he’d gone that morning, just to smell him. I couldn’t admit that I’d fantasized about making this place into a dream home that I could dance around for the rest of my life.

  “Really, Elaine,” he pushed. “Why didn’t you run?”

  “I dunno,” I lied, then realized I had a question of my own. “Why are you back so soon? You can’t have been in the city more than a couple of hours. You getting tired of the office or something?”

  We stared at each other some more, and I couldn’t fight the flutters in my belly. Something was happening between us . . . even under the hate and the craziness and the utter carnage in our world, something was happening . . .

  “Maybe I hurried back to wipe you out for good, how about that?” he said, but again, there was no malice in it. Nothing genuine.

  “Better wipe me out for good, then,” I replied, and held the trowel out to him with a sassy smile. “I imagine this will finish me off easily enough.”

  “You’re asking for it, you know that?”

  “I’m asking you to fuck me before you kill me, you know that? Even if it’s in the grass here, just get your dick out and fuck me, please.”

  We stared again, and my mind was churning, thinking. Why the hell was Lucian Morelli in a garden in the middle of nowhere while his empire was moving at full speed in the city? It didn’t make any sense. None of this made any sense in the goddamn slightest.

  “I should wipe you the fuck out here and now,” he said, but still the monster wasn’t in his voice.

  “Do it then,” I pushed again. “Just fucking fuck me first, please.”

  He stalled, staring. “You are a crazy little bitch, Elaine. You could have been back in Bishop’s Landing by now and laughing at my demise. It would have been my mistake for leaving the fucking door unlocked.”

  “Could have been, but I’m not,” I said. “I guess I really am a crazy little bitch, aren’t I?”

  I knew I was crazy. He knew I was crazy. Every zing of wanting him was sending me higher than cocaine ever could. I couldn’t fight it, and I didn’t want to. I’d wanted the monster from the very start at Tinsley’s ball. I hadn’t been able to resist his evil hands on me from the very first moment we met.

  “You truly are crazy,” he told me. “You are downright insane for being here.”

  “Yeah, tell me something I don’t know.”

  “There’s plenty you don’t fucking know,” he said, and then he did it.

  Lucian Morelli grabbed me up from my knees and slammed me into the wall at the side of his crappy house. I thought he would hurt me, finally . . . I thought he would tear me apart, this time for good . . .

  But he didn’t. Oh fuck, he didn’t.

  Lucian Morelli slammed me into the wall at the side of his crappy house and kissed me like he meant it.

  30

  Lucian

  I couldn’t fight it any longer. The truth was too strong in my mind. Elaine was too good a temptress, and I couldn’t resist her anymore. I pressed her up tight to the outside wall, and I kissed her, only this time it wasn’t laced with hate or spite or the need to tear her to pieces. This time it was about something I’d never felt before, something as alien to me as pain.

  I was in love with her.

  I was in love with a Constantine.

  Both the Constantines and the Morellis would kill me for my crime, and I wouldn’t blame them. I’d kill myself for my crime if I didn’t love myself too damn much.

  There was as much truth and need in the way she kissed me back. We were frantic, desperate beyond belief as we made our way along the wall towards the front
porch. I backed her in through the front door with my mouth still hungry on hers, and it didn’t matter which direction we were headed in, just as long as her body was next to mine. I was confused and split apart by conflicting desires. I wanted to save her from her past and savage her in her future both at once. I craved her pain and her tears and her cries of my name, only this time it wasn’t power and punishment driving me, it was more than that. It was fascination for her body and her desires and her needs, because she needed it like I did. Elaine was a masochist to my sadist, the yin to my yang, the light to my dark, the blonde to my black.

  Elaine was the Constantine to my Morelli.

  She mumbled against my mouth.

  “Hurt me, Lucian. Make me yours.”

  I growled and bit her bottom lip, shunting her towards the living room.

  “You’re already mine. Your pussy will be the jewel in my crown.”

  “It’s given, not stolen.”

  Her words gave me another chill of a thrill. She wasn’t stolen, she was given. I’d never wanted anything I’d been given before. I’d always claimed or bought it, taking everything on my own terms.

  Strangely enough, I didn’t want to take the jewel in the crown – not so quickly or frantically. I wanted to enjoy every second of holding back.

  Elaine was wearing so much of my crap against the cold. I tugged my sweater up and over her head and cast it away. I tore my shirt apart so hard the buttons sprang off, and there she was, beautiful in her bra. I tugged my pants off her, oversized and hanging, and she wasn’t wearing any panties underneath. She was naked perfection as I unclipped her bra and thrust her through the living room doorway.

  I held her wrists over her head against the living room wall, pinning her firmly enough that she let out a moan. She rubbed against me, that sassy smile of hers so pretty it sent me wild. I ground my hips against hers, then forced her legs open with my thigh, and we were right back there, in the bathroom at Tinsley Constantine’s ball. If I’d have believed in fate I’d have believed in it in that moment. If there was such a thing as destiny this would be ours, star-crossed lovers whose paths belonged as one, no matter how much it would cost them.