“Whew,” Barb muttered.
“Yeah. I sort of lost it there.” Lynette grinned. “Not sorry.”
Barb chuckled. “Me either.”
“Would you go for a walk with me and Starr?” She moved off Barb’s lap but kept a hand on her thigh.
“I’d like that, but give me a minute.” Barb’s hand shook as she reached for her cup and took a drink.
“Are we okay?” Lynette worried she’d pushed Barb too far.
“You are so damn sexy.” Barb stroked her cheek. “You’re driving me crazy. In a good way.”
Lynette tipped her head and leaned into the touch as it radiated through her body to her toes. She covered Barb’s hand with her own and turned to kiss her palm. “You do things to me, Barb Donnelly. Scary things.” She squeezed her hand gently and stood. “Shall we walk?”
“I think I can now.” Barb smiled and followed her out.
Lynette tugged on Starr’s leash. “Come on, sweetie.” She led the way to the one-mile trail.
“I like this path.” Barb looked up at the trees as she walked and took Lynette’s hand. “I’d like to ask you a question. If you don’t want to talk about it, that’s fine.”
“Okay.” Lynette thought back to what she’d already told Barb.
“You told me your aunt saved you after the cult. How did you get to her when you escaped?”
“Let’s sit on that log.” Lynette tugged on Starr’s leash and settled on one end to leave room for Barb. She took a deep breath before beginning to speak. “One of the new kids in the group told me he and his parents had walked from a nearby town. When I ran away, I hoped his memory was correct about the direction, because that was the only plan I had. Fortunately, I made it to the town and found a pay phone. I had some change I’d sewn into the hem of my skirt along with a crumpled note with Aunt Jen’s phone number on it, so I called her from that pay phone.” Lynette wiped away tears, and Starr leaned onto her side. “I hadn’t had contact with my aunt for twelve years, so I was afraid she might’ve changed her number, and I only had enough change for one call. Anyway, she drove through three states to get me. I still can’t believe she found me in that tiny desert town. I’m grateful they had the name painted on their water tower. I hid in an empty barn within sight of the pay phone for the twenty-four hours it took for her to arrive.” Lynette shivered.
Barb pulled her into her arms. “I’m grateful for your aunt. I can’t imagine how frightened you must’ve been.”
Lynette nestled into Barb’s embrace. “I was terrified. I was certain someone would come after me, but I was so relieved to be out of there. It was the longest twenty-four hours of my life. I knew I hadn’t made a mistake, but I couldn’t help but feel like a traitor, too. I had a hard time acclimating to the outside world until my aunt found a great therapist for me.” Lynette squeezed Barb’s hand as they stood and walked back to her apartment. “I’m glad you came over tonight.” She leaned and kissed her.
“I’m glad I did, too, and thank you for trusting me with your story. You’re a brave woman. It couldn’t have been easy to fit into a strange world.”
“No, it wasn’t. I had no idea what a cell phone was, or that something called the internet existed. I had a lot to learn to be able to understand what people were talking about. It’s crazy how fast the world develops, and I was way behind. Claudia was helpful, too, when I started working at the hotel.”
“I’m glad you’re still working there, and I found you.” Barb looked at her watch. “I should get back and let you get some sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow at breakfast.” Barb brushed her lips over hers before leaving.
Lynette watched Barb drive away and scanned the parking area before locking her door. She hadn’t relived these memories in years. It reminded her of the vast differences between them. Barb grew up loved and able to pursue the life she wanted. What in the world would she want with someone so damaged by life? She had no frame of reference for her feelings, so she gave up for the night and went to bed.
Chapter 31
Barb propped herself on the bed with an extra pillow and picked up her book. She’d been back at her room for half an hour and couldn’t stop thinking about the latest kiss she’d shared with Lynette. Barb longed to be the recipient of the passion simmering beneath the surface of Lynette’s restraint, but she’d be going home soon. Back to the job she loved, which had caused her previous lover to leave her.
She concentrated on reading and unsuccessfully tried to quiet the voices in her head. Could she keep in touch with Lyn after she went home? Would Lyn even want to? She could return to Wisconsin on some weekends and maybe Lyn would agree to visit Michigan, but how long would that last? She wasn’t one to have shallow relationships based on sexual attraction. She wanted a deep, meaningful long-term relationship, but she’d learned a lesson from Ann. Just because she wanted it didn’t mean it would work out, but to never try again saddened her. Maybe she and Lyn were destined to enjoy each other’s company while she was here and nothing more.
She shoved away any more heavy thoughts and went to sleep hoping for dreams of Lynette’s kisses.
Barb awoke from a restless sleep and finished a cup of coffee on the balcony before showering and dressing for breakfast. She looked forward to seeing Lynette and spending time with her as she headed to the dining area. She’d allow herself that much.
The line for omelets was the shortest Barb had seen it. She sat for a few minutes to enjoy watching Lynette work. She snuck glances at her between guests, and Barb smiled at the blush that crept up her neck to her face. She finally stood and went to get her omelet.
“Good morning,” Lynette said.
“Morning. It’s good to see you.” Barb took her omelet plate. “Do you have time for a balcony visit today?”
“I’ll be there as soon as I clean up.”
The heat behind her look sent desire fluttering in Barb’s belly. “Great.” She finished her omelet and took two muffins back to her room. She set up the coffeemaker and sat to wait. What was she waiting for? Was Lynette expecting something more between them? Had their super-heated kiss caused a shift in their feelings or intentions? Her feelings had grown, and Barb wanted to keep seeing her even after she went home. How to do that was her dilemma. The knock on the door shook her out of her reverie.
“Hi.” Lynette stepped into the room and into Barb’s arms. “I missed you.” She stepped back before going to the balcony.
Barb brought coffee to the table between them and sat. “Have you ever been to Michigan?” she asked.
A look of confusion flashed across Lynette’s face. “No, but I looked it up on my map. Why?”
“I’d like to keep seeing you after I go home. I thought maybe you could visit. If you want to.” Barb took a drink of coffee and waited for a reply.
“How long a drive is it?” Lynette looked to be concentrating hard.
“It only took me about seven hours, but it depends on how fast you drive. It might take eight. Unfortunately, there aren’t any direct flights.”
“I’d like to, but I’ll have to see if I get any vacation time. And it would only be a visit. I’m worried you want more than I can offer. I told you I can only offer friendship.” Lynette frowned, clasped her hands, and twisted her fingers. “Are you leaving early?”
“No. I plan to stay another week, and you can visit as my friend from Wisconsin.” Barb rested a hand on Lynette’s. “Are you okay?”
“I am.” She lifted Barb’s hand and kissed it. “I’ve mostly only driven from my apartment to work and to my aunt’s and back.”
Barb’s stomach churned when she saw the conflict in Lynette’s eyes. She stood and wrapped her in her arms. “We’ll work something out,” she whispered.
“I’m all right.” Lynette rested her head on Barb’s chest and moved closer. “I get nervous driving sometimes even if I know where I’m going or following someone.”
“I have a GPS unit you can have. All you have to do is liste
n to the lady telling you where to go.” Barb’s stomach settled, but areas lower began to stir. She embraced Lynette tighter.
“We’ll talk about it later, okay?”
“Sure. I have muffins.” Barb reluctantly released her hold. She put the muffins on the table by their coffees. “How much time do you have?”
“Plenty.” Lynette spoke softly, cradled her face in her hands, and kissed her.
Barb leaned into the kiss and slid her hands under the back of Lynette’s polo shirt. Her skin was soft and warm. She struggled to maintain control when Lynette moaned into her mouth. She drew tiny circles on her back before gliding her hands out from under her shirt. She rested her hands on her hips and leaned away slightly. “Whew. If we keep this up you’re going to be late for work.”
Lynette looked at her watch. “Yep.” She cleared her throat. “I guess I better go.” She didn’t move. “We’ll talk later.”
Barb lifted her hand and kissed it before walking her to the door. Lynette had her own way of processing, and she had to respect that. And if she didn’t want things to go any further, well, she’d have to accept that gracefully, too, even though she had a feeling they could have something special. If it wasn’t meant to be, then so be it. But she couldn’t help but hope.
After Lynette went back to work, Barb began to pace on her balcony. She recognized her unrest as pent-up energy and days of too much food. She put on her running shoes and headed outside.
Her usual day at home consisted of much more walking than she’d done on vacation, and three weeks of little activity and too many desserts had her jeans feeling tight. She ran along the river and didn’t stop until she felt the strain in her leg muscles and stopped to stretch and watch the river for a minute. Her thoughts drifted to Lynette as they often did now. She wondered about the caller looking for her. Lynette was nervous about it, and frustration boiled in Barb’s gut knowing she couldn’t help her. She stretched again and began her run back to the hotel, having to dodge someone standing practically in the middle of the path. People could be so rude.
Barb turned up the hot water and leaned on the wall as it flowed over her body. She’d never been one to linger in the shower, but the spray trickled over her body, and her nerve endings exploded with sensation. Lynette’s fingers sliding over her skin. The sweet, hungry look in her eyes that made Barb want to take her to bed and protect her at the same time. She stepped out of the shower and quickly toweled off. She would not come in the shower like some teenage boy. She wanted the real thing and challenged herself to wait until she could get it. Or to give in only when it was clear an alternative wasn’t an option. She dressed and went to see Lynette, the object of her desire.
“Hey, there. I missed you at lunch.” Lynette set a piece of cheesecake on the table.
“And this is why.” Barb pointed to the cake. “I went for a run. I think I’ve gained ten pounds since I’ve been here.”
“Do you want me to take this back?”
“Absolutely not.” Barb grinned.
“I’m going to see my aunt tonight. Would you like to go with me?”
“Is she all right?”
“Oh yes. I visit her every two weeks. We get Chinese food for dinner and have a glass of wine. I know she likes you, so I’d like you to join us.”
“I’d love to, but maybe you should check with her first. She might like alone time with you.”
“I already did.” Lynette chuckled. “She’s excited to have you there. I’m going to stop at my place and pick up Starr on the way.”
“Okay. I’ll put this in my mini-fridge and meet you back here when you’re done cleaning up.” She put the cheesecake away and grabbed her jacket. She got to spend an evening with Lynette and her aunt, almost like a normal dating situation. The thought made her smile and she jogged up the stairs to her room.
Chapter 32
Lynette watched her aunt hug Barb as if she were part of her family. She allowed herself a rare sense of sadness at the knowledge her aunt was her only family. She’d met several people in her recovery group who’d had parents who’d been with them in the cults and who’d taken care of them. They missed them after they escaped. Others had parents like hers who’d abandoned them after they joined the cult. She mentally shook herself, and gratitude for her aunt filled her heart.
“I’m so glad you came with Lynette.” Aunt Jen smiled at Barb.
“Thank you for letting me butt into your time with her,” Barb said.
“Come on, you two. I have coffee, tea, water, brandy, and wine.”
“I’ll have a glass of wine if you are, please,” Lynette said.
“A cup of tea sounds good with Chinese food,” Barb said.
“Let’s relax in the living room. You two go sit. I’ll bring in the drinks and food.” Jen disappeared into the kitchen and returned with her hands full. She set the cartons of various items on the coffee table and gave them each a large spoon. “There. Help yourselves to anything you’d like.”
Barb stood. “You sit. I’ll get the drinks.”
Lynette made Starr lie next to the couch and turned to face her aunt. “Is everything quiet?”
“I think so, dear. But I thought I saw someone new hanging around my studio two days ago. I didn’t recognize them and they didn’t come to the door. We get new folks coming and going all the time, so it’s probably nothing to worry about, but I’ll keep my eye out for them.”
“Could you tell if it was a man or woman?” Lynette fought down the simmering panic.
“Sorry, no. They were wearing a long coat and some sort of hat. That’s why they caught my attention. It was eighty degrees outside. No need for a coat.”
“Thanks for telling me. I’ve been sort of watching since the call, but now I’ll be more vigilant. I’d sure like to know who called looking for me.” Starr stood and rested her head in her lap.
“I’ll let you know if I ever get another call. I promise. We both changed our numbers, so it won’t happen.” Jen took her hands and squeezed. “I love you, honey. You’re safe now, and you have a delightful girlfriend, so try to relax.”
“Barb is not my girlfriend. We’re friends.” Lynette didn’t sound convincing even to her own ears.
Aunt Jen patted her leg. “Whatever she is, I’m glad she’s in your life.”
Barb returned with wine and cups and set them on the table before sitting next to her. “Thank you for all this.” She rested her arm over Lynette’s shoulders.
Lynette picked up her fork and a carton of food. She ate quietly, listening to her aunt and Barb talk while they ate. She felt a chill when Barb moved her arm to reach for her cup.
“This is great,” Barb said.
“Aunt Jen didn’t give you a tour the last time we were here.”
“You’re right. Come on, I’ll show you where I work.” Jen stood and motioned for them to follow her.
Lynette smiled at her aunt’s enthusiasm. She watched Barb examine all the paintings and etchings in Aunt Jen’s gallery. She sat in one of the chairs in the gallery.
“Your aunt is very talented.”
“She is. I’m glad you got to see her gallery. She likes you.”
“I like her, too. I couldn’t dislike her since she took such good care of you.” Barb lifted her chin with one finger and swept her lips over hers.
“Okay, you two. You’re not alone here.” Aunt Jen shook her head and smiled.
Barb stood, but before she could speak, Aunt Jen put up a hand. “Relax. But know if you hurt her, you’ll have me to deal with.” She wasn’t smiling when she spoke.
Barb sat and grinned. “You’re the second person to warn me. Claudia is just as protective. I’ll bet Starr would say the same thing if she could talk.” She turned to Lynette, took her hand, and kissed it. “You are well protected.”
“I know, and I’m grateful. We should probably get going. Work comes early.” Lynette hugged her aunt good-bye and promised to visit again soon before she followed Barb to
the car. Lynette turned to face Barb before starting the car. “I hope my aunt didn’t scare you. She’s pretty protective of me.”
“I think it’s great she is. I grew up with two parents and a younger brother who were always there for me. I can’t imagine how difficult it must have been to be dragged to a remote compound and expected to be an adult at twelve.”
“I didn’t know any different, and I didn’t realize how much I missed out on until I was free. I had, still have, a lot to catch up on. You asked me about coming to Michigan to visit, and I haven’t even been out of Wisconsin since I moved here. I’ve never been on an airplane, or taken a train or even a bus anywhere. I’ve read about places and countries around the world, and Aunt Jen wants to take me to the Canadian Rockies someday. To me, that feels like a world away.” She rested her head back on the seat, and Starr whined from behind her. “I’m okay, sweetie.” She reached back to touch her. “I better get you to the hotel.”
Barb rested her hand on her shoulder the whole trip.
“I’ll see you in the morning. Be careful driving home, and thank you for taking me with you.”
“Sleep well.”
Barb pulled her gently into a kiss so tender it brought tears to her eyes.
Lynette kissed her back with as much restraint as she could muster. She wanted Barb. More than she dared admit. Fear held her back, but she could feel it weakening with each kiss.
She took a deep breath and expelled it before beginning the drive home. “What do you think, sweetie? You like Barb, too, I can tell.” Her aunt sure did. She’d called Barb her girlfriend. What did Aunt Jen see that she didn’t? Where was the line between friendship, dating, and girlfriend? Her therapist had told her to try not to suppress memories of her time in the cult. She had to remember and talk about it in order to move on, so she allowed her thoughts to drift.
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