Endless Winter Box Set: Books 1 - 4

by Theresa Shaver

  I grunt, “Good for you. Why? What do you want from me?”

  She glances around quickly to make sure we’re still alone and finally meets my eyes.

  “I’m going to get you, Benny and your friends the frack out of here!”

  What the hell? How is this girl so familiar with how I talk and what I call my little brother? I jerk my hand from hers.

  “How do you know that word? Frack?”

  A slight smile tugs at her lips but all she says is, “Starbuck.”

  I’m slightly surprised. “You watched that show?”

  She nods. “I’ve watched all the same shows as you.”

  Ok, super creepy so I fire back. “Stalker much?”

  She blushes in embarrassment and takes my hand back to cover it with ointment.

  “The General made me watch footage of you and your brother for years. Both bunkers were linked through AIRIA. He wanted to keep tabs on what was happening here after your dad died.”

  I hiss in outrage. No longer creeped out, I’m furious.

  “You spied on me? For years, you’ve been spying on me every day?”

  She keeps her eyes down and switches hands. “Yes, but it’s not like I had any choice in the matter. If it wasn’t me, it would have been one of his flunkies. Better to have me than some old guy watching you! If I hadn’t spent thousands of hours getting to know you, your brother and your friends you wouldn’t have me as an ally. Trust me, as distasteful as me watching you might seem to you, it’s going to work out in your favor.”

  I can’t even process the idea of all the things she’s seen over the years while watching me. All the ups and down. The small joys and huge heartbreaks? It’s like she’s peeled me open and exposed everything that I am so I shove it ruthlessly aside to deal with later and focus on the now.

  “So, you’re going to get us out of here? How? Are you magically going to take down those drones that will track us the minute we make a break from here?

  She finishes wrapping my second hand and pats it before leaning back on her heels, looks me dead in the eye and simply says, “Yes.”

  When she doesn’t elaborate, I scoff, “Really? You want to tell me how one girl my age surrounded by soldiers managed to get the power to do that?”

  She cocks her head thoughtfully. “He forgot to take away my access.” She pauses for a second and her face goes hard. “He also underestimated me.”

  I shake my head in confusion. “Who are you?” I ask.

  Her eyes seem to lose focus like she’s gone far away but her whisper is clear.

  “I’m his downfall.”

  Interlude Two

  AIRIA EAST

  Seven years ago …

  Joslin

  When we were forced down into the lower levels, I kept my eyes peeled for Jackson but I never saw him or his dad. The woman that was assigned to be my mentor, Captain Marie Cote, has even less patience dealing with me down here than she did above. She keeps one hand clutched around the collar of my shirt as she pulls me through the stacks of shipping pallets and containers until she finds a corner out of the way and thrusts me towards it.

  “I want you to stay right here. Do not wander around or leave this area until I return. Once things get organized, we will find a place to set up our bedding. Do you understand?” She asks in a distracted voice as she looks over her shoulder.

  My voice is barely a whisper when I agree but she must hear me or she just doesn’t care because she turns and strides away. I sit there for hours clutching my backpack and plastic bag full of bedding, waiting for her to come back to tell me where to go. My mind can’t stop thinking about the tablet in my pack and the video footage it has of what went down outside. Half of me is desperate to look at it but the other half is just as desperate to not see what I already know happened so I leave it in my pack. I can’t see what’s happening on this level with pallets blocking the way but I can hear plenty of movement and loud voices calling out instructions. The smell of exhaust is in the air as forklifts move pallets to create space for the soldiers to set up living areas and relocate the supplies from the top level but none come near where I’m hiding. After sitting there undisturbed for hours, my eyes start to droop so I open my plastic bag and retrieve the flattened pillow and a blanket and lay down against the wall. I let sleep take me away but my dreams are filled with the sound of gunfire.

  The corner becomes my home for the next two weeks when Captain Cote and three other female soldiers join me in the hidden area with mattresses that had been brought down from the barracks before it was sealed off. There’s just enough room behind the row of pallets for our beds to run head to foot down the wall with a small space to walk beside them. We spend ninety percent of our time sitting on our mattresses waiting for the renovations to be completed on this level. It was never meant to house people so the soldiers have to build a food service area and expand the two restrooms so that they can handle the large population. Even with the soldiers split between three lower levels, the restrooms weren’t meant to handle this many people and neither one of them had showers in them.

  For the first week, we only leave our area to stand in the long restroom lines and to receive our daily rations that they give us first thing in the morning to last the whole day. We wait in boredom and uncertainty for the changes to be made and some kind of schedule to be put in place to fill our days. The other four women in my area mainly ignore me after the first round of questions about who I am and how I ended up here. There’s not a lot to talk about after that so they spend most of the time sleeping or staring off into space, lost in the memories of their loved ones that are now likely gone.

  By the end of the first week, things start changing as projects are wrapped up. There’s a huge area in the center of the level that has been cleared for them to start training with ground mats and exercise equipment along one side of it. Meal times expand to picking up rations three times a day instead of all at once in the morning with the promise of real hot food coming soon instead of the bland MRE’s. The major change is the attitude of the people. The shock of what’s happened has worn off and they start thinking of what the many years ahead will be like stuck in this bunker. Tempers flare causing heated arguments and sometimes violence. There’s so much tension on the level and every time I leave my area I see faces that are filled with hopelessness or anger. By the end of the second week, I’m forced to clutch the pillow around my ears at night to block out the horrible sounds of weeping and worse that are becoming more frequent.

  On my last night in the corner, I wake in the middle of the night with a desperate need to use the restroom. I try and ignore it and go back to sleep but it’s not happening so I throw back my blanket and quietly try to move past the other mattresses but my foot connects with someone’s arm laying in the tight aisle. I freeze with my eyes squeezed shut but whoever I kicked with my foot doesn’t wake so I carefully step over it and move on. Most of the lights are turned out at night, so it isn’t hard for me to keep to the shadows and avoid running into anyone. I make a dash to the first door of the two options on this level and push the door open. Right away I see a male soldier sitting on the ground with his back against the far wall. He’s sobbing into his hands and doesn’t see me so I back out and let the door close on his misery. Privacy is at a premium with so many people crammed into the levels so I don’t want to disturb the little bit that the poor man has found.

  I rush to the next door but it swings open just as I reach it. A woman stands in my way with a swollen eye that will soon be ringed with a black bruise and a split lip that trickles blood. She looks right through me as if I’m not there as she slides past me, letting me get a view of a man without a shirt washing his hands at the sink. Once again, I quickly back away from the door. If that guy did the damage to the woman’s face, I don’t want to be anywhere near him. I decide that my bladder will just have to wait until morning when things will be slightly safer and turn back. This time I make a straight shot across
the main training area where the lights are brightest, no longer trusting the shadows. I just want to get back to my mattress and bury my head and wail with despair at the sad state of things on this level. I haven’t seen the General in two weeks and as far as I can tell, there’s next to no leadership keeping things under control down here.

  I’m in such a rush to get to my mattress that I forget the arm I kicked earlier and end up stepping right on it this time causing me to lose my balance and topple directly onto the person I stepped on. The breath whooshes out of me and it takes a few seconds for me to start apologizing as I try and push myself up and off. My instincts start screaming before my head catches up to the realization that the person I’m on top off hasn’t reacted at all to being stepped on and then crashed into. A mewling starts up in my throat as I reach my hand out to the person’s face and touch her cheek but it doesn’t feel like a normal cheek. It’s cool and slightly rubbery making my skin crawl and my stomach roll. The noise I’m making gets louder and changes to a sobbing hiccup.

  A beam of a flashlight flares to life and waves around the area until it lands on me, lighting up the empty face and eyes of Captain Cote inches away from mine. I shove off as hard as I can and lunge off of her to land painfully on the concrete floor beside her mattress. The light is like a spotlight that stays on her dead face for what feels like forever before it moves slowly over the sleeping area highlighting a pile of empty blister packs beside her head. Like a detective nodding at evidence, the light bobs once before it moves over to spear into my eyes then drops to the floor in front of me.

  I’m trying to get my breathing under control and blink away the spots that have formed in my eyes from the bright light when I hear the voice of the next woman in the mattress line.

  “Huh, looks like she killed herself.”

  Her tone is so bland that I gape at her in disbelief and stutter out, “Wha…what, what do we do?”

  She drops the light even further so it’s pointing down at her lap, backlighting her face and making her look like a ghoul when she shrugs.

  “Nothing. Just leave her. Someone will come get her in the morning. Go back to bed.”

  With that, she flicks the light off and lays back down, rolling over so her back is to me. My heart is racing out of control as I crab walk on hands and knees to my mattress where I push as far into the corner as I can. I wrap my arms around my knees and rock back and forth. Everything here is wrong. I can’t live here. I’m used to doing a lot on my own but this is too much. I can’t do it. From the violence and despair to the dead body that no one cares about four feet away from me, I just can’t handle this alone! I yank my blanket from the bed and ball it up to cram into my backpack and manage to get my flat pillow halfway in before zippering it up as much as I can. I stagger to my feet and push my back against the pallets to give myself as much distance as possible from the body and slide past.

  The woman with the flashlight must hear me because she rolls back over and mumbles, “Where are you going?”

  I’m still having a hard time breathing right so it comes out breathless.

  “Away…away from here…I can’t stay here anymore.”

  She rolls back over with a barely audible, “Good luck, kid.”

  I slide the rest of the way past the last two mattresses where neither woman even stirs and bolt for the door that leads to the stairway between levels. I’ll go up. I’ll go up to the General and Jackson. I’ll tell them what’s happening down here and beg them to let me stay up with them. I hit the push bar on the door with all the force in my small body and it flies open and slams into the wall behind it. The only thought in my mind is to get to Jackson but it only takes me two steps up to hear the scuffle coming from the next landing. The sounds of fists hitting flesh and men cursing have me spinning on my toe and throwing myself in the opposite direction. Down and down I go passing the doors to the next level. I need to get away from the noises of pain and misery. I go until there is no more stairs, just a door that I push open and plunge through. My feet slide to a stop and I let the silence wash over me. This is what I need, no people and no ugly noises.

  I stand there clutching my pack to my heaving chest as I look around. The train is still in the same place it was when we got off of it two weeks ago but there’s no one here. I look around the platform and my eyes zero in on the familiar restroom signs, one for women and one for men. I hold my breath as I turn the handle for the ladies’ room and crack the door. It’s a single stall room that lights up with the door’s motion. I blow out a pent-up breath in relief that it’s completely empty and rush in to take care of business.

  As I wash my hands with soap and warm water, I study the stranger in the mirror. I don’t recognize this gaunt, haunted waif with dark circles under her eyes. The black curls are a matted, oily mess from not having a shower in weeks. I don’t know who this girl is any more so I turn away and leave the room. I check to make sure the men’s room is also empty before walking the length of the platform. It’s completely empty except for a janitor’s closet with cleaning supplies and soap refills for the restrooms. There’s nothing else to see down here except the train so I walk up to one set of doors and stumble back when they automatically open. There’s nothing in the train except for padded seats so I take one more look around the platform and then step onto the train. I pick a random seat and slide into it before pulling my pillow and blanket out of my pack. With the pillow between me and the glass of a window, I tug my blanket up to my chin and close my eyes. I listen to the silence all around me and feel safe for the first time in weeks. I don’t want to leave here so I don’t.

  …….

  For the first day, I just sit and enjoy the peaceful solitude. I know it won’t last and someone will come for me when they realize that the babysitter the General assigned me to is dead so I want to enjoy the quiet while I can. I take advantage of having a restroom all to myself by washing my hair and body with the hand soap using my blanket to dry off with. I hang it over a few seats to dry and eat the single ration that I’ve been keeping in my pack as a holdback. By the time night rolls around again I’m feeling more like myself and can analyze what I think is happening to the soldiers, who are really just people in uniforms. This is a transition for them. They have to deal with the loss of everything and everyone they loved and accept that they will be forced to live here for many years to come. It’s like being sent to prison and I know a little bit about how that feels from being in orphanages and foster homes. You have no control over anything and it can drive a person a little bit mad. Add in lack of leadership and you get what’s happening up there.

  All I really know is that I want no part of it and I need to keep far away from them until they get a handle on the situation. I go to sleep for my second night on the train with the decision to stay here until someone comes looking for me. That means I need some supplies so tomorrow will be a busy day.

  The first thing I do when I wake up is pull my tablet from my bag. I haven’t looked at it since I left Jackson in his dad’s quarters. I was too afraid that someone would take it from me so I kept it hidden in my backpack. When I turn it on and see it has a forty-seven percent charge on the battery, I make a note to look for electrical outlets so I can charge it up. I don’t know if there are speakers down here so I open the message app and ask AIRIA. When her voice comes from the ceiling, I get my answer.

  “Joslin Frost, how may I be of service?”

  A grin of relief crosses my face. I had no way of knowing if the General had taken my clearance away or not but clearly, he has forgotten all about giving it to me in the first place so… Yay me! I have a few questions I need answered before I move forward with my plan so I just ask them.

  “AIRIA, when was the last time anyone was on this level?”

  “Joslin Frost, there has not been anyone on this level since the day of arrival.”

  Perfect, next question. “Is it possible to lock the stairwell door?”

  “Joslin
Frost, the stairwell door is equipped with a locking mechanism but only a green level clearance is able to engage it.”

  Darn it! No matter, I’m sure I can come up with some kind of door blocker or wedge that will at least give me some notice if someone tries to come in. Thinking of someone trying to come in…

  “AIRIA, is there any way to know if someone is looking for me?”

  “Joslin Frost, no one has requested your current location since you have entered the facility.”

  I chew on my lip in consideration before asking, “Is it possible for you to let me know if someone does ask about my whereabouts?”

  “Joslin Frost, request logged.”

  Alright then. Now I’ll know if someone’s going to come looking for me. Until that happens I’m claiming this as my new home. I look around the train car and then get down on the floor to look at how the seats are attached to the floor of the car. Satisfied, I get back up and open a folder on the tablet that has all the supply locations and inventory lists in it. I’m going to need some things.

  I’m nervous about going back on the higher levels but I know that when the soldiers are scheduled for training sessions in the central cleared area, I can move around without being seen. I’ll have to be sneaky and it will take quite a lot of trips up and down the stairs to bring down all that I will need to live comfortably here but it will be so worth it to have peace and safety. I start tabbing through the screens, wishing I had a printer so I could have physical copies to make it easier, but I don’t so I rummage through my pack and pull out the few school books I had with me the day the bombs dropped. I find a math workbook and a lined notebook and pencil so I start writing out what I need to get in priority and where to find each thing.

  My stomach chooses that moment to start rumbling, reminding me that I’ve only had one meal in the past two days. Food goes on the top of the list. It’s the number one priority and I start looking to see where the pallets of MRE’s are stored. The idea of going to the food service area three times a day to get my food fills me with dread. I think it’s best that if no one’s looking for me I disappear so that anyone who’s had contact with me in the last two weeks simply forgets that I exist. Second on the list will be bedding. I need somewhere better to sleep because trying to get a restful night sleep on these benches, even if they are padded, is going to get old pretty fast. Thankfully, the mattresses in stock are fairly thin and easy to roll up otherwise I wouldn’t be able to haul one down the stairs without notice. After that, tools. I’m going to need to make some space in this train car to make it comfortable. I know my skinny arms aren’t going to be able to undo the bolts holding the seats to the floor but I know all about leverage from my last science unit and I should be able to get them off with some type of crowbar and wrench. At least I can try anyway. I leave my list at those three things for now because they’re the most important to me. I can always add to it later if I think of more things. Right now, I want food even if it is the bland rations we’ve been consuming for the past two weeks.