Heaven's Loss (Hell Yeah!)

by Sable Hunter

  Canyon’s answer was a throaty snarl. “Oh, hell yeah.” Glad of the dark, she reached behind her back to undo the clasp as he trailed fiery kisses from the pulse point in her throat all along the sensitive line of her collarbone. Every heated lick of his tongue, every tiny nip and nibble of his mouth sent Seren soaring higher. And when his hands found her breasts, cupping them – molding, kneading – she moaned, her nipples growing diamond hard. “Fuck, you’re perfect,” he growled, lifting her breasts, his mouth covering one nipple to suckle hungrily.

  Using lips and tongue, he pleasured her breasts until she writhed with ecstasy in his arms. All the time he was feasting at her grateful flesh, she cradled his head, touching his back and shoulders, conveying the love she felt for him in every touch. When his hands moved from her breasts to push the body suit farther down, alarm bells sounded within Seren.

  Canyon wanted to make love.

  She wanted to make love.

  As much as she craved this intimacy with him, she knew the act would complicate things in countless ways. Was she ready for this?

  Her chances to be with him like this were dwindling fast. Seren felt her whole being surrender to her greatest desire.

  Feeling her hesitation, Canyon placed a reverent kiss over her heart, then began to adjust her clothing. “You’re right. We agreed last night not to rush things. I’m sorry.” He rubbed his face over her bare chest. “You go to my head, beautiful.”

  Seren started to argue with him – but she didn’t. She’d always been taught things happened for a reason. “Don’t be sorry. I enjoyed everything about tonight, especially this time in heaven with you.”

  “Me too. This has been some Halloween.”

  She held onto him while he felt on the floor for her cape, placing it around her shoulders, then straightened her seriously askew ears. “Will you hold me just a little more before we go, please?”

  “Absolutely.” Canyon cradled her close. “I wonder what tomorrow will have in store?”

  “Anything’s possible, I guess.” She sighed with happiness, savoring the moment, her head buried in the solid warmth of his chest. After all, here they were, living in a fantasy, keeping the real world at bay on the other side of a closed closet door.

  * * *

  “No. Sorry. You can’t stay here by yourself. You’re coming with me.”

  As Canyon waited patiently at the door for her to gather her things, Seren wanted to stomp her foot in frustration. “I have to be on my own sometimes. I can’t stay with you forever.” She didn’t really know what she was saying, she wanted to be with him. She needed to protect him if she could. But – she also wanted to feel normal!

  Frowning at her logic, Canyon shook his head. Adamant. “Not willing to risk it. Come on.”

  Seren stood her ground. “Diego doesn’t know where you live!”

  “We don’t know what Diego does or doesn’t know.” Canyon tapped one booted foot softly. “You wouldn’t be so cantankerous if we’d had sex last night.”

  With mouth agape, Seren stared at Canyon. “I can’t believe you said that.” Yes, she knew she was being irritable, probably for the very reason he stated. She was also frustrated because of the extreme unfairness of her situation. Gone was her rosy outlook on life. Maybe the full extent of her humanity was kicking in. She’d barely slept a wink last night because she was too busy feeling sorry for herself. “For your information, I was ready to have sex with you when you called it a night in the closet.”

  Canyon froze. “What?”

  “Nothing.” Waving her hand in dismissal, Seren looked around the house. “Plus…if I stay here, I can have supper done when you get home. If I could borrow your computer, I could begin to make some plans. I’ve been thinking about taking Celine up on her offer and moving to Houston and…”

  “What did you say?”

  Seren almost didn’t hear the soft-spoken question. “I offered to stay home and cook supper and asked if I could borrow your computer.” She wasn’t sure she knew how to use it, but thought she might be able to figure it out.

  “Did you say you were ready to be with me last night?”

  Seren met his gaze. “Yea, I was ready. I want to be with you.”

  Canyon exhaled on a laugh. “Well. All right.” He grinned at her. “You should have said something. I laid in the bed and ached for you.” Seeing her dumbfounded expression, he gave her a wicked grin and held out his hand. “Come on. You can’t stay here by yourself. I wouldn’t get a damn thing done today for worrying about you. Besides, we’re going to the movies tonight. Remember? We’ll get something to eat while we’re out.”

  Seren didn’t know which one of his revelations to react to first. Deciding to go with the flow, she brightened. “I forgot about the movies.” Taking her purse, she moved toward him. “Is this a date? I’ve never been on a real date before.”

  “That’s impossible.” Canyon locked the door behind them. “Were you raised Amish or something?”

  “I lived in a…religious atmosphere, you might say.” Seren lifted her face to inhale the spectacular fall air, smiling at her own inside joke.

  “And what about this guy you care about? What’s up with him? I don’t understand your relationship with this moron.” He was so envious of the man he didn’t know what to do.

  Seren couldn’t help but smile at his grumbling. “Don’t judge him. It wasn’t his fault. Everything that went wrong can be laid at my feet.”

  Helping her into the truck, Canyon mumbled, “I don’t believe that for a minute. I bet you’re being far too generous.”

  Knowing this conversation was going nowhere fast, Seren leaned over to open his door, then introduced a new topic. “So, what movie will we see?”

  Canyon didn’t get a chance to answer one question before she asked another.

  “And where will we eat?” Her eyes grew big as she had another thought. “Will we come back here to change clothes? I don’t have anything really snazzy to wear. Can we dress casually?”

  Catching on to her ploy, he started the engine, then held up his hands in surrender. “All right. You win. I won’t speak ill of Saint George.”

  “Saint George?” Seren crossed her arms over her breasts, not because she was upset – sparring with him excited her. “His name isn’t George.”

  Canyon shrugged. “He’s perfect, or you think he’s perfect. From everything I’ve heard, George Clooney is considered to be the perfect man. Hence…George.”

  “Pfft.” Seren made a scoffing noise. “You’re a funny guy.”

  Raising one eyebrow, Canyon gave her a look so heated her panties got soaked.

  “Funny, huh? Just wait until tonight. I bet you won’t be laughing then.”

  “I guess we’ll see,” she told him with a straight face. Inside, she was jumping up and down. She could hardly wait to be with him again.

  Later that day

  Reaching across the table to touch her hand, Canyon whispered, “Are you okay?”

  “Oh, I’m fine,” she assured him. “This is wonderful. The restaurant is perfect. The food is perfect.” Yet…she wanted to cry. Keeping the smile on her face, keeping her voice even was difficult. You’re perfect.

  “Okay.” He didn’t look completely convinced.

  What she told him was true. Like the old song said, if she could save time in a bottle, she’d save every moment of this perfect evening for eternity to relive again and again. “Seriously, I’m having a wonderful time.” Seren looked around at the Legends Steakhouse. “I feel so special.” She smoothed the lace top she wore, hoping he thought she looked nice. “I don’t want the evening to end.”

  Canyon ran his thumb over the linen napkin he’d laid by his plate. “I’m glad you’re enjoying yourself.” He couldn’t explain the way he felt – sort of desperate, full of anticipation. In a weird way, he felt like time was slipping through his fingers. He needed to do something to hold onto it, and he wasn’t sure what that could be. “So…tell me someth
ing about yourself. How did you end up in Kerrville? Just a convenient stop in the road? Destiny, maybe?”

  Seren fiddled with her own napkin. “I was walking down the interstate and stopped when I was too tired to go on.” Mostly true.

  Canyon’s face darkened like a thundercloud. “Are you glad you’re here? Is there anywhere you’d rather be?”

  Reaching out to cover his hand with hers, she assured him, “There’s nowhere I’d rather be.”

  “Who’s better looking?”

  His question caught her off guard. “What?”

  Canyon pressed his lips together, feeling foolish. “I asked who was better looking. Me or George? And I don’t mean Clooney.”

  Him seeking reassurance from her made Seren’s heart clench in her chest. “I think you know how handsome you are. You have no reason to ever doubt your appeal.”

  “My wife turned to someone else.”

  “Your wife made the wrong choice.” For the wrong reasons. “Grief will do funny things to us.” Wanting to see him smile, she squeezed his hand. “Tell me what makes you laugh.”

  Canyon could see what she was doing. “Oh, I don’t know. My friend Bull can usually crack me up. His sense of humor is so dry.” He shook his head. “I’m not much for slapstick. I don’t like silly movies or comedians.”

  “I bet you like kitten videos.”

  This made Canyon laugh. “I do, actually.” Pinning her with a stare, he whispered, “You’ve been spying on me, haven’t you?”

  Recalling their conversation right after he brought her home from the hunting trip, she laughed. “Oh, yea, I have cameras and bugs rigged up all over your home. I know everything about you.”

  “And I know next to nothing about you.” This thought sobered Canyon. “You dole out smidgens of information like rare coins. Did George know everything about you?”

  Seren’s face fell. “Yea, he did. And that’s why I couldn’t stay.” The moment the words left her lips she knew they were a mistake. He wouldn’t let this go.

  “What do you mean?” He leaned forward across the table, recapturing her hand when she tried to pull it away. “What could he possibly know about you that would force you apart?”

  “Don’t do this,” Seren muttered.

  “So, why aren’t you with him? Are you over him? Will you ever be over him? If we’re together tonight, am I just a substitute?”

  “God, no.” The irreverence slipped out easily. She could never let him believe that. “Don’t ever think that. I think you’re absolutely wonderful. I am so attracted to you. I want you for yourself, don’t ever think otherwise.”

  Yes, she was saying all the right things. But what wasn’t she saying? “So…why?”

  Seren closed her eyes and hung her head. What could she say? She swore she wasn’t going to lie to him – not about this. And she couldn’t tell him the truth. “He knew everything about me and he loved me anyway. But because he knew everything…I couldn’t stay.”

  “Well, that makes perfect sense,” Canyon grumbled. “What did he find out about you?” Narrowing his eyes, he studied Seren’s face closely. “What? Are you married?”

  “No,” she scoffed, wondering why this didn’t feel awkward. If there was another man, she’d feel differently, she supposed. But there wasn’t…Canyon was her all in all. “No, I’m not married.”

  “Are you a thief?”

  “Oh, yea. A jewel thief.” She tugged on her top. “That’s why I have so much money to spend on clothes.”

  “Are you an alien?” His voice dropped to a conspiratorial level. “Come on, you can tell me.”

  “I didn’t cross the border illegally, no.”

  He gave her a disarming grin. “Are you an ET?”

  She spread her hands. “Bingo. You got me.” Sometimes the truth is the best policy, especially since there was no way he would believe it.

  “I knew it.” Canyon raised his hand to call the waitress over. “I think we have time for dessert before the movie. I can’t believe you chose the horror film.”

  Seren breathed a sigh of relief when he seemed to let the subject go. He seemed relaxed now. “The type of movie didn’t matter. I just want to make out with you.”

  Her words pushed the idea of dessert completely out of his mind. When the waitress came, all he had to say was, “Check please. We’ve got to hurry to the theater. I want to get good seats.” He winked at Seren. “In the back row.”

  …Despite her bravado, once they were seated in the theater, Seren stared straight ahead. She was nervous and she didn’t really know why. Canyon was as familiar to her as the back of her hand. Yet…after existing in the background for so long, being the focus of his attention was still new to her and very overwhelming. Before the house lights went down, as the moviegoers were filing in, she took deep breaths to calm herself.

  “Can I get you anything? I should’ve asked on the way in, but you had me distracted.”

  Canyon’s whispered admission was welcome. “I could use some water or a soft drink.” Her stomach felt a bit uneasy. Seren didn’t know if it was from the previous conversation – or from the baby.

  “No problem. I’ll be right back.” He gave her a kiss on the cheek. “Don’t go anywhere.”

  “I won’t.” She eased to one side as he moved by her. Once he was gone, she immediately missed his comforting warmth. Closing her eyes, she counted to ten. The prospect of the baby was never far from her mind, but she still needed to go to the doctor. Seren remembered there was a free clinic in Kerrville. Tomorrow when Canyon was occupied, she’d make an appointment and beg a ride from Doris. She didn’t really need confirmation, Seren could sense the baby’s presence, a part of Canyon residing beneath her heart.

  Placing a hand over her belly, she acknowledged the inevitable. Soon, she would need to leave. As badly as she wanted to stay, explaining the unexplainable to him would be impossible. With a sigh, she wondered at all that had transpired. If she could, would she wish none of this ever happened? Would she be happier as Canyon’s watcher, never having known the miracle of his love?

  “No.” As sad as it made her, she wouldn’t have missed this for the world. Lord Tennyson was right. Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

  When the time was right, she’d know it. Walking away from him would be hard, but knowing – that even then – she would be protecting him would make the pain easier to bear. She could also take comfort that it wouldn’t hurt him – not like it would hurt her. Canyon wouldn’t fall in love with her this time. She couldn’t expect – nor did she deserve – a second such miracle.

  “Here you go.”

  When he rejoined her, Seren took the cup and gratefully sipped the soft drink. “Thank you so much.”

  “I got you some chocolate covered raisins too.”

  With a surprised giggle, she held out her hand. “This makes up for the missed dessert.”

  “Huh. I thought my kisses would be sweet enough.”

  He was right – they were. When the lights went down, he took the half-emptied cup and candy from her and set it aside. “I can’t wait any longer. I need you now.”

  Seren melted into his arms. “Will anyone notice?”

  “Yea. And they’ll be so-o-o-o jealous.” Placing a hand on the side of her face, Canyon was aware of her excitement. Her breath was coming fast and those amazing tits of hers were rising and falling in an erotic rhythm. He would’ve stared at the enticing sight, even if it hadn’t been rivaled by her beautiful face and gorgeous eyes. “You’re unbelievable. I can’t look at one part of you without worrying about what I’m missing.”

  “You aren’t missing anything. We have all night.”

  Her soft breath on his cheek convinced him she was right. “I know and I’m going to make every moment count.” Covering her mouth with his, he parted her sweet lips with his tongue and kissed Seren the way he’d dreamed of doing all day. When she let out a soft little moan, his cock came roaring to life
. No one had ever done it for him like this woman. Without even trying, she made him feel like a raging bull. His body craved her like a drug, like he already knew how fuckin’ unbelievable it would be to make love to her. “Closer,” he mumbled, pulling her tighter into his embrace. Pushing his tongue roughly into her mouth, he gripped her hair in his balled fist. Kiss followed kiss, each one deeper and hotter than before. Canyon intended to make damn sure this woman never forgot him.

  When they needed to breathe, he feathered kisses down her neck, easing up on the pace a little. Seren rested her hand on his chest. Canyon knew she could feel his heartbeat. “You taste so good.” Her mouth had been sweeter than wine, but her skin was extraordinary. Creamy. Delicate. Feminine. Grazing his teeth over the tender cords of her neck, he nuzzled the soft spot beneath her ear. When she shifted restlessly in his arms, letting out another of those desperate little moans – he knew making love with Seren would be the highlight of his life.

  Returning to her face, Canyon kissed her again – sucking on her lips, tracing the delectable bow, drawing her bottom lip into his mouth and biting it gently. “Oh, Canyon,” Seren moaned softly as she ran her hands over his shoulders, his arms, and his chest. “Take me home.”

  “You don’t want to see the rest of the movie?” he asked with a teasing tone.

  “What movie?” She nipped him on the chin. “The only thing I want to concentrate on is you.”

  That was all he needed to hear. “Let’s go.” With a few mumbled excuses, they made their way out of the back row and down the aisle to exit the theater.

  Once they were in the truck and headed home, Canyon chuckled.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked with a hint of uncertainty in her voice. She knew he didn’t remember them from before, so for Canyon this was his first time in a long time.

  “Not a damn thing.” He reached over to take her hand. “This should probably be awkward, but it’s not. It feels right.”

  “It is right.”

  “You won’t be sorry,” he muttered as he managed to keep the truck between the ditches. He forced himself to slow down. Getting them there in one piece was necessary to the success of the rest of the evening. “This is going to be perfect. I promise.” Canyon took a deep breath. The way he was shaking, he just hoped he lasted long enough to give her the pleasure she deserved.