by Angela Mack
"No problem. We should do it again sometime." I raised my eyebrows at her. "Er, if you want to. I mean," she shrugged.
"Why?" She frowned at me.
"What do you mean?"
"Why would you want to spend lunch with me again? I wasn't exactly amazing company. I barely spoke the entire time." She didn't answer straight away and I wondered if she was going to at all.
"I...we're supposed to be friends, right? Friends get to know each other…" She looked away, her cheeks colouring faintly pink.
"I don't think you'd like me very much. If you got to know me." Now it was her turn to look surprised.
"We won't know until we find out." Not likely. If I spent much more time around her, she'd figure out that I really was a dick and definitely go blabbing.
◆◆◆
After eating some actual decent food at lunch, I was feeling pretty pumped about going to a double session of art before the end of the day. Jess had walked with me to class, nattering away the whole time. I was relieved that she took her usual spot at the front, whilst I shuffled to the back. That girl was exhausting and I'd only spent five minutes with her.
Mrs DeLaney, a scatty, eccentric woman, set us our project for the year. She reminded me of Professor Trelawney from the Harry Potter films (yes, I'd watched them all. And yes, I can unashamedly admit I love them just as much as Georgie).
"Inspiration!" She clapped her hands twice, her long skirt swishing around her legs as she swayed a little. Her short, greyish-brown hair was sticking up in all directions and she had ridiculously large hoop earrings in.
"That's the theme for this year. It can be something that inspires you or something you want to inspire other people." Urgh, great. I didn't have a whole lot of experience with that.
"Before you start thinking about your final piece, I want you to research a range of different artists. They can be any style and any medium. But I want you to fill your sketchbooks with little testers. Try out some of your ideas following another artist's style. Show me your journey…" she proceeded to hand out some example sketchbooks from previous years. Wow, some of these people were seriously talented.
"And get out of your comfort zone. Don't fill your sketchbooks up with all sketches or all watercolour. Experiment with oil paint or charcoal or collage…" Well, I guess my idea of spending the year sketching had gone out the window. I had no idea what my final 'piece' would be. I spent the rest of the session flicking through books and biographies of different artists that Mrs DeLaney provided, noting down which ones I could try tester pieces out for during our next class. By the time the final bell rang, I was a little disappointed. I had been enjoying looking at other people's methods for escaping reality.
On the days I wasn't working, Ryan and I would meet over the road outside Georgie's school. With all the hours I worked, I felt like I didn't get to see either of them much, so I made the most of spending as much of my spare time with them as possible. After the incident at the weekend, Big Mike hadn’t come home for three days. It was pretty normal for him to be absent a lot, as he worked long shifts at all sorts of hours. However, three days was the longest he’d not come home for in a while. I tried not to get my hopes up that this time, he wouldn’t come back at all.
On a typical day, it was rare for him to be home much before 10 p.m. Even if he’d worked an early morning shift, he’d stop by the betting office, or the pub, or both, and not come home for hours. Not that I cared. If anything, it made me feel more comfortable about working so late while the boys were home alone. Rarely would I come home and find Big Mike had gotten home before me, and even if he had, Ryan and Georgie had plenty of practice staying out of his way and locking themselves in our room.
“Hey. How was art?” Izzy jogged to catch up with me as I crossed the road. My God, this girl didn't give up. Surely she was sick of me by now?
“Fine. Where are your sidekicks? I didn’t think you went anywhere without them.” Shit. That didn't sound very nice at all, my true colours starting to show. Thankfully, she seemed to think I was joking and laughed.
“Who, Jess and Sophie? Sophie went straight home after lunch, said she wasn’t feeling well, and Jess is staying late to work on her fashion project for textiles.”
“On a Friday night? She doesn’t seem the sort to stay late on a Friday.”
“You’d be surprised. She wants to be a big designer one day and once she’s in ‘the zone,’ she tends to stay late to work on a project.”
“I wish I knew what I wanted to do and had that much conviction about being able to do it.” Why the hell did I just say that? She didn't need to know that. Besides, with my background, my best bet would be for Martin to take me on full-time at the shop and that would be it. What a career.
“Me too. I honestly have no idea what I’m going to do after sixth form. I’d like to go to university, but I haven’t decided on what course to study.” It was a little unnerving at how quickly I found myself opening up to her. Within moments, she had me telling her a little bit more about myself and I could almost see the gears turning in her head, trying to fit the pieces of me together like a giant game of Tetris. I had to keep reminding myself that I was only talking to her so she wouldn’t reveal my pathetic life to the rest of the world.
“Izzy!” Georgie saw us approach and came running over from where he was standing with Ryan, a big grin on his face.
“Hey buddy, how you doing?” She appeared genuinely happy to see him and ruffled his hair. I still didn’t understand how or why she had formed some sort of bond with Georgie, but I was grateful for someone putting a smile on his face nonetheless.
“Guess what?” she asked him as Ryan caught up, nodding hello to both of us as we all began walking together towards Martins. Unlike Georgie, Ryan didn’t seem quite as trusting of Izzy. It was more like he'd just make the most of anything good that came from her hanging around.
“We went out for lunch today and Josh brought you some extra food back.” She thrust the takeaway bag from Nando's at Georgie. “Oh, there’s my bus. I better go.” She ran off, completely avoiding my eyes.
“Thanks so much, Joshy,” Georgie’s face lit up, rummaging around the bag and peeking through the wrapping, trying to see what food it contained. Ryan leaned over, licking his lips in anticipation. I was stunned. What the fuck had just happened? How did she know that I had wanted to bring the boys some food back? My ego was definitely taking a kicking with this girl. She kept buying us food and helping me and trying to be friendly. I didn't understand why.
After shaking off my bewilderment, I started ushering the boys home. Georgie swung the takeaway bag back and forth by his side, a noticeable spring in his step. I spied a slip of paper at the top and snatched it out, smoothing it in my hands. It was the receipt from the order. The waitress must have stuffed it in there, and it was broken down into two sections. One for takeaway and one for eat-in. Under takeaway, there were two chicken burgers and chips, a portion of Roulette wings (hell yeah!) and three lots of corn on the cob. There was probably enough for me to have dinner with them too. I was about to crumple it up when I noticed what was under the eat-in section; chicken burger and chips and an extra chicken burger by itself. I frowned. No way. Izzy hadn’t actually purchased the extra burger for me and told the waitress to lie? No. She wouldn’t have. Would she?
As soon as we got home, we heated the food up and demolished the lot of it. We had all learned pretty quickly what ‘roulette wings’ were; you had no clue how spicy each one would be. Georgie ran around the kitchen, eyes streaming and repeatedly gulping down mugs of water at one point. It was hilarious.
"Fuck me, that was awesome," Ryan beamed, sauce from the wings smeared around his lips. Georgie nodded his agreement with a big toothy grin. He had bits of chicken stuck in his teeth and some kind of mayonnaise streaked across his cheek. They looked like kids for a change, carefree and with full bellies. I was conflicted; part of me was happy to see the boys smiling, but the other part wa
s irritated that it was because of Izzy and not me. I could feed my brothers just fine without her. I'd managed this long without any help.
I thudded upstairs to our room, pulling out my phone and crashing onto my bed. I do feed them, you know. I hadn't used Izzy's number before today, but right now the overwhelming urge to message her was too fierce to ignore.
Who is this?
Josh.
I know you do.
So why do you keep buying them food? She didn't answer straight away. I could almost feel her hesitation through the phone. It makes me feel good to do something nice. Well shit, how was I going to respond to that?
You paid for my burger today too, didn't you? The one the waitress said they'd made by mistake.
What makes you think that?
Your receipt was left in the bag.
Ah. No point me denying it then.
Why would you do that? I could have bought myself a burger if I wanted one.
I saw you outside Nandos looking in your wallet. You looked stressed so I thought maybe you didn't have enough on you. Oh for fuck sake, she was annoyingly perceptive.
Plus your stomach was rumbling the entire walk there, so you can't tell me you weren't hungry ;) Great. Just great. She's seen where and how we live, so the rational part of me knew it was obvious that we don't have a lot of money. But it irked me to know she pitied me.
I didn't mean to offend you. I was just happy that you agreed to come and I didn't want you feeling awkward or uncomfortable. I kept rereading the text. I had made her happy? I didn’t understand this girl at all.
At that moment, my brothers came bundling into the room, both jumping on my bed and I smiled as we settled in for another movie night. I pushed all thoughts of Izzy right to the back of my mind.
Chapter 9
Isabel
“Izzy, you’ve had a death grip on your phone for the past twenty minutes. Who are you messaging?” Jess threw a cushion at me and it smacked me right in the face.
“Hey!”
“Well, come on. Who’s distracting you from the Twilight movie marathon we have going on right now?” Jess gestured to the TV, currently showing the first film. It was up to the part where Bella and Edward won the golden onion. I really did love these films. Usually the three of us were chattier when we stayed over Sophie’s, but she’d been rather quiet, so Jess had stuck the films on instead.
“I think I’ve upset Josh…” I wasn’t sure how much I should confide in them, but Josh hadn’t replied to my last message for almost half an hour and I was fretting a little.
“How do you have Josh’s number? How does he have yours?!” Jess squealed, hitting pause on the film and turning towards me on Sophie’s bed. The three of us were sprawled across the huge king size mattress, Sophie and Jess at the end nearest the TV and me propped up by the pillows. I had been alternating between staring at the screen and staring at my phone, willing a new message to appear.
“I can’t remember exactly. We swapped a few days ago,” I shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant. Jess frowned, clearly not believing me.
“Why do you think you’ve upset him?” Sophie asked, hugging a pillow to her chest and pulling her knees up. She definitely didn’t seem herself tonight. Maybe if I shared a little bit, she’d feel encouraged to do the same.
“You know today at lunch, when the waitress brought him over that free burger?”
“Of course. How could we forget the waitress that practically shoved her tits in his face?” Jess rolled her eyes and I frowned. She had been annoyingly flirty, alright.
“Well, it wasn’t actually free. I had paid for it but asked the girl at the till if she wouldn’t mind lying about it.”
“Why the hell would you do that?” Jess tilted her head, confused.
“I don’t think Josh had realised we were going to a restaurant. I got the impression he didn’t have much money on him and then when I heard him only order chips and tap water, I was pretty sure he was a bit strapped for cash. I felt bad for asking him to come and not telling him where we were going first," I sighed.
“I must admit, I was shocked you invited him in the first place,” Jess said.
“I think it was nice. He only ever sits with that other guy and I don’t think he was in today.” Sophie didn’t have a bad bone in her body and she always knew how to make me feel better about something.
“Yeah well, I guess he found out somehow that I paid for it and he was texting me earlier. But when I tried explaining, he stopped replying.”
“OK, so you bruised his male ego a little. So what? I’m not even sure he’s that nice a person, Iz.”
“What makes you say that?” I turned to Jess, interested to hear what she had to say.
“Well, you’ve seen the bruises he’s covered in. He’s always starting fights. I heard he broke some kid’s nose because he accidentally knocked a sandwich out of his hand. I was so nervous walking to art with him earlier that I kept blathering on like an idiot!”
“That can’t be true. Mr Tapps would have expelled him for that.” No way would the Head of Gilleford School have allowed him back to sixth form if he’d broken someone’s nose.
“It must have been outside of school or something…”
“I don’t think I have ever seen Josh start a proper fight at school,” Sophie interjected and she was right. A bit of shoving and yelling, but never an actual fight.
“He’s obviously careful about it at school. But I know for a fact that he and that Ollie kid beat up some students from the private school on the other side of town last summer.” Jess crossed her arms, disapproving.
“Look, I know he doesn’t scream Mr. Nice Guy but maybe he’s a bit misunderstood. You know, like how I was last year,” I said pointedly. I knew Josh didn’t have a squeaky-clean history, but I was getting a little irritated by Jess’ judgemental glare.
“Just be careful, Izzy, yeah? We don’t want you getting hurt,” Sophie smiled at me.
“It’s not like I fancy him or anything. I'm only trying to be nice.” Jess snorted at me.
“Yeah, yeah. You keep telling yourself that.” She rolled her eyes and I ignored her, shaking my head.
“Don’t tell anyone about the extra burger at Nando's please? Last thing I need is Jack or Ed finding out and making some inappropriate joke to him. I was trying to be discreet," I begged and they both nodded.
“So, what’s up with you, Soph? You’ve been a little quiet. I wasn't sure tonight was still going ahead after you left early today.” I turned to her, changing the subject but hoping she’d open up. It was unlike her to be so stand-offish, like she had the past week or so. She rested her chin on the top of her knees and I wasn’t sure she was going to answer.
“I kissed Jack…” she whispered.
“What?!”
“Oh my God, when?!” Jess and I both gaped at each other, shocked that neither of us had heard about this sooner.
“Earlier this week. His family own the next farm over, but I hadn’t really spoken to him much before this year. We hit it off when we all went to the cinema. He was easy to talk to.” She smiled, staring at her toes. “He started hanging around the farm, helping me out with the horses and chatting.” She shrugged, going quiet.
“Okaaay…go on…” Jess encouraged and Sophie huffed, her shoulders sinking even lower than they already were.
“Well, on Wednesday when he came by, we kind of ended up...kissing. It got pretty heated…” Sophie started turning red and Jess wolf-whistled.
“Sophie! You’ve been holding out on us.” She smiled for the first time tonight but then immediately looked sad again.
“Yeah, well, it clearly didn’t mean anything to him,” she mumbled.
“Why do you think that?”
“Yesterday I saw him walking down the road with some other girl. He had his arm slung around her shoulders. And she was gorgeous, Iz. Tall, stick thin with huge boobs and long blonde hair. The complete opposite of me.”
&nbs
p; “Oh, shut up, Soph. You are seriously hot and if he can’t see that, he’s a moron,” Jess said and I nodded in agreement.
“Maybe she was just a friend?” I offered.
“I was naively hoping for the same thing too but after Ed’s comment today about stamina…” she rolled her eyes, her mouth straightening into a thin line.
“Have you asked Jack about it?” She shook her head.
“Nah, been ignoring his texts. I was starting to like him, but I am not going to be messed about.”
“Good on you! You’re right. If he’s going to dick about with some other girl, then he’s not good enough for you anyway.” Jess threw her arm out, pulling Sophie closer to her and squeezing her tight.
“Yeah. You deserve better than that,” I echoed.
“Thanks girlies,” she smiled.
“Right, come on. You know the last film is my favourite and we’re never going to get to it if we keep pausing it.” Jess grinned at us both and I felt better now that we had all cleared the air.
“I am not staying up all night again. I have work tomorrow,” I laughed, throwing the pillow from earlier back in her face.
“We’ll turn the volume down low and you can doze off.”
“Fine.” I shook my head at her, laughing. I knew full well I wasn’t going to get much sleep and I would be a walking-zombie tomorrow.
◆◆◆
"You seem a lot happier lately, dear," Mary beamed at me, watching me work as I arranged one of the largest bouquets I'd done yet. Mary had lots of laughter lines around her eyes, which were magnified by her round, thick-rimmed glasses.
"I have made some really great friends this year," I grinned. She came closer, inspecting my arrangement as I wrapped it in cellophane and tied it off with a yellow ribbon bow. I caught a whiff of her lavender perfume as she leaned over, her long dark plait falling forward on one side as she examined the flowers.
