Real Fake Husband: A MM Contemporary Fake Married Romance

by Lily Light

  After I promised my mom we’d be there, she finally let me off the hook. I showered, dressed, and left the house. Noah was heading to the bar from his office.

  “I see you two are back to posting obnoxious pictures on social media,” Ian said.

  I knew he was talking about our latest batch of photos. They were pretty tame. Shots of Noah in his boxers, making me coffee. The photo looked natural. I wasn’t in it, although I was tempted to take a few selfies.

  Parker liked all of them. Thankfully, Parker hadn’t bothered me after the last time we met.

  Ian ordered us both drinks at the bar. I looked over his shoulder. Noah was making his way to us. He had a big grin on his face, which I returned.

  “Hey, babe. Looking good tonight,” he said, planting a chaste kiss on my cheek.

  He always looked good in that navy suit. We just saw each other that morning and yet I missed him.

  I yearned to feel his possessive hands all over my body. If Noah yanked me to the men’s room right now, I would’ve complied. I would’ve instantly dropped to my knees and sucked him off. Maybe even beg him to fuck me.

  Slow down, I reminded myself. I told myself earlier that I was going to behave. The twinkle in Noah’s eyes told me that he knew I was thinking filthy thoughts. Ian rolled his eyes at both of us as if he’d seen it all.

  “You can have Ryan all to yourself when you guys are at home. I need some best friend time here, so shoo,” Ian said. “Jordan’s shooting pool by the table. I think he was looking for you earlier.”

  “Later then?” Noah asked me, pulling me into his arms.

  I didn’t want to let him go. I nuzzled his neck for a while while he ordered two beers.

  “Yeah, go unwind a little bit,” I suggested. “Jordan looks like he could use a friend.”

  Noah raised an eyebrow. “Did something happen?”

  “The guy he was supposed to meet didn’t show,” Ian explained. “Don’t know why he seemed all torn about it. Jordan hooks up with random guys all the time.”

  “Ah, that sucks,” Noah answered.

  “He’ll probably take someone else home,” I said under my breath.

  I wasn’t too worried about Jordan. Flirting was as natural to Jordan as breathing.

  “Don’t be too hard on him.” Noah released me to grab the beers the bartender slid across the table.

  “I want him to find someone, a real boyfriend but I’m not sure my brother’s ready to give up his ways,” I told Noah.

  The happiness and contentment I found with Noah? I wanted the same for my brother and best friend. They didn’t know what the hell they were missing out on. Casual hook-ups was just a one way street to misery.

  “You never know. Just look at us.” Noah winked at me and with his beers, walked over to his best friend.

  The two guys bumped their fists together. I was happy to see they made up. We made up.

  I couldn’t believe how insecure I was about where our relationship was going. I let my inner demons take advantage of me. I nearly blew my chance at real happiness.

  “I should’ve trusted him to keep my heart safe,” I told Ian. “I never should’ve bailed.”

  “Hey,” he said, handing me my beer. “Take it easy on yourself. Sure, you might’ve screwed up a little but you fixed it right on time.”

  Ian was right of course. I silently swore to myself I’d never keep anything from Noah again. I promised him that the next time we had a serious disagreement, we’d sit down like proper adults and talk things out.

  My mom’s words earlier came back to me. Married couples fought all the time. That was a given. Relationships weren’t easy but I was willing to put in the work.

  “What’s going to happen next?” Ian asked me.

  “I’m looking forward to some peace and quiet. Resume our normal lives.” I paused. “We mesh well together.”

  “Yeah,” he said, clinking his beer bottle with mine. “You do.”

  “You think he’ll be alright?” I asked Noah.

  I watched him put a very drunk Jordan inside a taxi. Noah told the driver Jordan’s address and slammed the door shut. He turned to me.

  “Sure he will. He’ll probably have a nasty hangover the next day. That’s guaranteed. Don’t worry, I’ll check on him the first thing tomorrow,” Noah said. We watched Jordan’s taxi speed away. “He was really bummed out tonight.”

  “Because his date didn’t arrive? He’ll recover. Jordan always gets up after being knocked down. He’s tough that way.”

  “Yeah, that’s true.” Noah slid his shoulder over my arms. “It’s such a nice night. Want to walk instead of taking the train?”

  Our apartment was five blocks away but I didn’t argue. Noah was right. The air was cool but not freezing. I inhaled the familiar scent of him as walked home. With Noah, I always felt safe. Happy.

  “So my mom reminded me there’s a family barbecue this weekend.” I pointed out.

  “Janice called me, too.”

  She did?

  “Wait a second. Since when are you and my mom on a first name basis?” I demanded. I shot Noah a suspicious look.

  “We’ve gotten close. I drunk dialed her a few times during our short break-up period. Now before you get all worried, I basically just told her how much I missed you. I didn’t give anything away.”

  “She never told me any of that,” I said, frowning. “So you guys are best friends now?”

  “Do I detect jealousy in your voice?”

  “No,” I said quickly. “I just wished she mentioned it. Mothers aren’t supposed to keep any secrets from their sons.”

  I sounded a little grumpy to my ears. Noah kissed me on the cheek and just like that, I felt like I was on cloud nine.

  “Don’t worry. Our secret will die with us,” he told me with a smirk.

  “Our pretend marriage is no longer a secret. It’s been real for a long time now,” I said.

  This time, Noah did kiss me on the mouth. I clutched the lapels of his coat. I lost myself in him, in the press of our lips and the heat of our bodies. We had to pull up for air eventually. I couldn’t wait to get home so Noah could fuck me senseless.

  We walked back to our place, holding hands.

  “Jordan and you looked like you were discussing something serious earlier. Anything I should know about?” I remarked.

  We settled in the kitchen and Noah made us both coffees. He pushed my cup across the counter. I picked it up and took a sip.

  “Nah, Jordan just needed to vent.” He explained.

  “You’re not keeping anything from your husband, are you?”

  Noah pretended to look shocked. “Why, babe. I’d never keep secrets from you.”

  “Good, just checking.” We finished our drinks.

  I felt a little sleepy while Ian and I were chatting in the bar, but now, I was wide awake. Sleep wasn’t on the agenda yet.

  “So, are you tired, or are you in the mood for some extracurricular activities?” Noah asked with a wiggle of his eyebrows.

  “I was thinking about showering together. You know, to save water.” I suggested.

  “It’s been a while since I fucked you in the shower, huh?”

  I could feel my cheeks and neck heating up. No surprise there. Noah could easily make me embarrassed and aroused.

  My brain conjured up the image of Noah kissing me against the tiled wall, his dick rubbing against mine. Me dropping to my knees, about to give him the best blow job of his life.

  “Race you there,” I said, tugging off my shirt.

  My jeans and boxers came next. I was feeling playful and mischievous.

  Noah overtook me easily with his long strides. He enveloped me in his arms and kissed me until I couldn’t string a proper sentence together.

  The familiar knowing gleam in his eyes made my heart flutter with anticipation.

  “My turn,” he said, beginning to peel off his clothes.

  I licked my lips at the sight of his broad chest, hi
s six-pack abs, and the trail of hair leading to his dick. How was I able to survive without him, I’d never know.

  20

  Ryan/Noah

  Ryan

  I frowned when I saw Noah’s text that morning.

  Noah: Gotta run some errands. See you at the barbecue. Don’t be late.

  “What errands?” I said out loud.

  I dragged myself out of bed. Maybe Noah had to make a quick trip to the office because he needed to get more work done. If that were the case, Noah would’ve told me. My husband didn’t keep any secrets from me.

  I wasn’t feeling particularly optimistic today. I wanted to spend the Saturday morning, rolling in bed with Noah. I was almost tempted to skip out on the family gathering. I’d have Noah all to myself. On second thought, my mom would definitely be upset if we didn’t show.

  I wandered to the kitchen, pleased Noah left a pot of coffee brewing for me. I poured myself a cup and called Ian. He picked up after three rings.

  “Noah’s acting weird this morning,” I complained to my best friend.

  “Weird how?” Ian sounded out of breath which was odd. Ian never exercised a single day in his entire life.

  “He left me with a text, asking me to meet him later. We were supposed to head to Long Island together,” I told my best friend. “I wondered if he had to do something at the office but he would’ve told me earlier.”

  “You have nothing to worry about. Noah’s crazy about you.”

  “I’m not worried about anything. I just thought it was odd,” I grumbled.

  I wasn’t worried at all. I knew Noah would never cheat on me. Ever. Noah once told me that ever since we got together, he never checked out other guys. I was it for him.

  “Boy, I forgot how grumpy you are in the morning without coffee and sex with Noah.”

  “Damn right.”

  I expected to wake up like I always did, snuggled next to my husband, with my back pressed against his chest.

  Noah would almost always deviously line his dick against my ass. We’d fuck even before getting out of bed. I smiled at the image.

  “No, the arch doesn’t go that way,” I could hear Ian yelling to someone in the background.

  “Ian? What’s up with you?” I asked, frowning. “I heard something about an arch.”

  “It’s nothing,” Ian said quickly. “Just horsing around with my brothers.”

  “Horsing around?” I asked skeptically. Since when did Ian ever use those words?

  “Listen, Ryan. Sorry, but I can’t chat. I’ve got things to do this morning. Damn it, Rory. Have you called Father John?”

  Father John? What? Ian ended the call before I could ask any more questions. Damn it. Why was everyone acting out of character today? I ate some cereal and because I had some time to kill, I fired up my computer.

  I answered some of my emails but I wasn’t really in the mood to look at work stuff. Weekends were for rest. Even though I was a freelancer, I worked only on the weekdays and kept my Saturdays and Sundays free.

  I looked at my phone occasionally but there were no new texts from Noah. That worried me a little. Calm down, I told myself. There must be a reason why Noah was eager to rush out of the house so early this morning.

  “He might just be busy with work or he could have a meeting,” I told myself.

  However, I knew that Noah’s boss didn’t call his employees to the office on weekends. Maybe they had an emergency meeting or something. For a second, I wondered if I should ring him up. I scowled.

  That would make me seem like one of those insecure guys who needed to know where their husbands were every single second of the day. I wasn’t like that at all. I decided if it was really important, Noah would tell me.

  When noon rolled around, I finally took a shower. I left the house and headed for the ferry station that would take me to Long Island. Was Noah even going to turn up? I texted him.

  Ryan: Where are you? Are you still coming to the barbecue?

  Noah: Already here, babe. See you soon.

  I blinked, not expecting that. I decided I’d just have to grill my husband for answers when I saw him again.

  Noah

  I sweated profusely in my suit. I didn’t know why. I had no reason to be nervous. Ryan and I fixed whatever was broken between us.

  I stood in the Murphys’ yard, under a freaking flower arch. You heard that right. An actual wedding arch entwined with red and white roses.

  Ryan thought he was meeting me here for the barbecue. He had no clue I’ve been planning this for an entire week. He gave me a suspicious look earlier that morning when I told him I’d just meet him on Long Island.

  I came prepared. I didn’t arrive here wearing my tux just in case I vomited on the ferry. I didn’t by the way, but it was always better to be prepared.

  Jordan slapped my shoulder. “Dude, you look nervous.”

  I glared at my best friend. “Why are you and your cousins laughing at me?”

  “Because it’s so funny. You’re renewing your vows. You’re married already,” Jordan said like it was no big deal but it was, at least to me.

  I didn’t know why I pictured Ryan arriving and taking a look at the ridiculous arch and our small group of family and friends standing on either side of the aisle.

  What if took one look and bolted? I pushed that thought away from my mind.

  Ryan would never do that. He told me he got scared that time I confessed I was falling for him for real. He promised me it would never happen again.

  I believed him.

  “Noah, he’ll be here soon,” Ian said. “He called me, asked me what you were planning. He knows something’s up.”

  Five minutes later I could hear Ryan grumbling under his breath with another of his cousins. I think it was Rory.

  Rory led Ryan to the yard. My husband stood there, gawking at the group congregated there for a second. Then Ryan zeroed on me. He hurriedly walked down the aisle and grabbed my arm.

  “What’s going on here?” He demanded. Ryan waved at the arch and the wedding decorations. “What is all this?”

  Before Ryan had a panic attack, I pressed my hand against his cheek. I kissed him gently and tenderly. One of his cousins remarked it was too early to kiss the groom. Ryan and I both ignored him. Ryan looked at me and only me.

  The tension in his shoulders disappeared. Ryan relaxed.

  “This is why you wanted to meet me here instead of going together?” He asked. “Because you were preparing this surprise for me?”

  “Let’s renew our wedding vows. The priest is running a little late, but he’ll be here soon.” I reassured him. “Back in Vegas, it all happened so fast. Your mom was on board with this plan. So were Ian and Jordan, and the rest of your huge family.”

  I wouldn’t have been able to get everything ready without the help of Ryan’s family. I told Janice about my plans and she hollered orders at everyone like a drill sergeant.

  “I don’t even have a suit with me,” he began, looking worried. “I’m wearing a ratty t-shirt and my old jeans.”

  “Don’t worry about that, son. Your mother’s got it covered,” Ryan’s dad said.

  I grinned at him. Of course, Janice and I thought of everything.

  “Father John’s here,” Jordan said by my side. “He’s just parking his car.”

  “Let’s get you all suited up,” Janice Hall said, pushing her son towards the house.

  Ryan began to protest, but then seemed to thought better of it. I was really glad I asked Janice for advice. She came through for me. She became all gushy when I told her what I had in mind a week ago.

  Father John gave me a nod as he took his place. Ryan took longer than I expected to get ready. I wondered if this surprise was too much for him.

  Maybe I should’ve given him a heads-up. He looked stunned, like he never expected this. Jordan didn’t think I had a single romantic bone in my body either. I certainly took everyone by surprise.

  When Ryan emerged wi
th his mom in his suit, he looked so damn spiffy. Janice had his exact measurements down so his suit fitted him like a second skin.

  I had eyes for no one else but him. The wedding march started to play from the speakers in the yard. I didn’t know which of his cousins was responsible for the music but I was thankful for it.

  Ryan walked down the aisle accompanied by his dad. Janice was happily taking photos of him and the ceremony.

  I made a mental note to myself to ask her for copies of her photos later on. Ryan’s dad stepped back once they reached Father John and me.

  I took Ryan’s hands in mine. Father John spoke, but I barely heard what he said. Both of us stumbled along with our vows but it didn’t matter, because we felt the same way for each other.

  “I love you,” he whispered.

  “Love you back,” I answered automatically.

  Hearing those three words from Ryan’s lips, made my heart thunder. I was all warm and fuzzy inside.

  “You may kiss the groom,” Father John said.

  I closed my hand behind Ryan’s neck and leaned in close for an all-consuming kiss. I didn’t know how long we locked lips.

  I even slipped in a little tongue action. Father John politely cleared his throat. I could hear Janice in the background, asking him if he wanted to stay for the barbecue.

  “God, get a room,” someone yelled.

  Ryan gripped my shoulders and we continued sucking face. When we pulled up for air, both of us are were grinning like idiots. His family members were already working hand-in-hand to clear the space for the barbecue.

  “I have another surprise for you,” I told him.

  “Another one? Is this going to give me a heart attack?” Ryan teased.

  “I’m not sure,” I admitted. “When I was planning all this, I kept thinking if I should go big or small with the ceremony.”

  “Oh, Noah. Renewing our wedding vows here is perfect,” he said.

  “I went cheap,” I continued, “So I can take you somewhere far for our honeymoon.”

  I pulled out the envelope from my jacket and handed it to him. Ryan frowned at me suspiciously, before snatching the envelope. He opened it and two plane tickets slipped out. Ryan squealed, covering his mouth with his hand.