Filthy Beautiful: A Players Rockstar Romance (Players #2)

by Diamond, Jaine

  I glared at her for that.

  “Or… maybe I’m too good to have sex with you. In your mind, I’m this virginal white angel who can’t be sullied in any way?”

  I didn’t bother answering that.

  “You’re afraid that I’ll regret this or something and run home to my brother, crying about the big bad drummer who violated me?”

  I shook my head. “That’s—”

  “True. But what if you’re wrong about that? And what if it’s up to me to decide who gets to sleep with me, and I get to make my own mistakes, too? You know, like an adult.”

  “You’re an adult, Courteney. I get that. I’m not arguing that. But that doesn’t mean you’re ready for —”

  “For what?” She got to her feet. “For you?” She advanced toward me and I just stood there, trapped between her and the coffee table. “How much more ready could I be?” She put her hand on my chest again.

  I inhaled a deep, slow breath, just trying to calm my reactions to her.

  “You know how many times I’ve thought about it?” She ran her hand down my chest… down my stomach. “Hundreds,” she whispered, drawing closer, so I could feel her breath on my skin. “Actually… thousands.”

  “Thousands?”

  “Oh, yeah,” she said, her fingers drifting down to the waistband of my sweats. “I’ve wanted to have sex for years. Just because I didn’t do it yet didn’t mean I didn’t think about it.” She bit her lip, peering up at me.

  Holy shit.

  Her hand drifted down over the front of my sweats, and she squeezed my hard dick. I stiffened in her hand and adrenalin spiked through me.

  I didn’t pull away.

  “I know what I want, Xander,” she said softly. “Are you gonna give it to me?” She ran her hand up and down my shaft through the soft fabric of my sweats. “I want it to be you. I trust you…”

  Fuck. Her light, warm touch… her fingers drifting over the head of my cock, playing with me.

  “I’m so wet for you…” she whispered.

  Aaand that did it.

  I totally fucking caved.

  My whole body fell into her and I slammed my mouth down on hers.

  Soft. Wet. Amazing…

  I kissed her sweet mouth, stroking my tongue over hers, and she opened for me, kissing me back just as hungrily. Then she moaned into my mouth—and something tore apart inside me.

  Higher brain functions just seemed to cease.

  I pushed her down on the couch, climbing over her. Her thighs fell open and she wrapped herself around me as we kissed. I groaned and started grinding my dick against her thigh.

  Yeah, I fucked failed. Again.

  Just like she knew I would.

  Like we both knew I would.

  I couldn’t fucking resist this girl.

  I wanted her, and I couldn’t fight her on this anymore. I mean, I could… but what would be the point?

  She was right. At some point, sooner or later, I was gonna cave.

  If she kept coming around and flashing her pussy at me, telling me how much she wanted me… I was gonna fuck her, for sure. It was just a matter of time.

  And apparently, the time was now.

  I slid my hand up between her smooth, soft thighs as I kissed her. Maybe since we weren’t at Cary’s place, it wouldn’t feel so… wrong? She slid a hand down between us, too, and right into my sweats… and grabbed my bare dick.

  And yeah, it felt wrong.

  And so fucking right.

  I jerked in her hand, so hard and eager. I pumped my hips, fucking the soft sleeve of her hand as she squeezed me. Nudged my fingers up between her legs and stroked her soft pussy.

  She was wet.

  God, I needed into her…

  Condoms were all the way in the fucking bedroom, though.

  Shit.

  I tore my mouth from hers and looked at her as I panted for breath… lying under me on my couch, her hair all over the place, her lips all swollen and flushed. Her chin was pink from my stubble rubbing her.

  She was panting, too, her tits about to pop right out of her dress, and she was still squeezing my dick as she gazed up at me, waiting.

  Wanting.

  Jesus, she was fucking beautiful.

  I closed my eyes and took a breath.

  Calm the hell down.

  I didn’t want to rush this and lose control. She was right; she deserved better than that her first time.

  Hell, she deserved that every time.

  I didn’t want to hurt her, either. If I did that, I’d never forgive myself.

  And I really did not want her to have some fucked-up memory of the time she lost her virginity. One where she seduced me in a tight dress and begged me for it, and then I broke down and lost my head and fucked the shit out of her on my bedroom floor… and then, what? Tossed her out the door?

  Which was pretty much where this was heading right now.

  “Wait,” I gasped, opening my eyes. “Hang on, babe.” I pulled her hand off my dick. “If we’re doing this… We’re doing it right.”

  Chapter Nineteen

  Courteney

  Xander unlocked the door for us, and we stepped into the fanciest hotel suite I’d ever seen.

  “What is this?” I asked him softly, as he shut the door behind us and flipped the lock.

  I actually hoped he’d say something like, You’re a princess, so you get a suite for a princess.

  But he just said, “Neutral ground.”

  Then he walked ahead of me into the suite and turned on a lamp.

  “Oh.”

  I took that to mean… he didn’t want to fuck me where he lived… or where I lived either?

  I followed him into the room. It was a series of rooms that were all open to each other, with big sliding doors. A living room, kitchen, and a giant bedroom in the middle, with what had to be a king size bed.

  And a huge wall of windows that looked out over the water. I could see mountains across the way, over the sparkling lights of North Vancouver.

  After taking it all in, I found Xander looking at me. He was standing by the bed.

  I took a few more steps into the bedroom. Then I slipped off my shoes, setting my bare feet on the carpet.

  Without breaking eye contact, I took a deep breath, reached up and slipped the strap of my dress off my shoulder.

  But Xander walked over to me and laid his hand over mine, stopping me.

  “Not so fast,” he murmured. “Come here.” He took my hand and drew me into the adjoining bathroom, where he turned on a light. “You should have a bath first.”

  I stood in the middle of the big, sparkling-clean room while he knelt by the giant bath and started filling it with water.

  “Why?” I said, looking around. “Because I’m so filthy?”

  He shot me a dirty look. “Because it will help you relax.”

  I stood by the bathroom door, watching, as he left the bathroom and went over to the bar. He searched through the fridge, and pulled out a bottle of wine. He opened it and poured two glasses.

  Then he brought them back over to me and handed me a glass.

  “Hmm,” I mused, taking it from his hand. “You serve minors in this establishment?”

  “Don’t make it twisted.”

  “It’s already twisted,” I said.

  Yet neither of us was stopping it.

  I took a sip of my wine as we stared at each other. He definitely wasn’t fighting me anymore. I wasn’t sure what had changed. If it was the white dress, or the compelling argument I’d made? I’d practiced it for days, after all; I’d been groomed for pre-law studies and I was determined not to give in.

  Somehow, I’d gotten what I wanted. Or at least, I was pretty sure I was about to get what I wanted.

  But he still wasn’t touching me.

  He moved past me, setting his wine on the bathroom counter. Then he went to get the shopping bag he’d left by the door; we’d stopped at a drug store on the way here, and he’d ru
n inside while I waited in his car. I’d assumed he was getting condoms. Instead, he pulled out a bunch of candles and a lighter.

  I watched him light each one, and set them up around the bathroom. Then he turned off the bathroom light. The warm, flickering glow of the candles glowed off the gleaming walls.

  I bit my lip.

  This was so not what I’d expected from him.

  It was kind of making me more nervous.

  I drank more wine. It seemed to be going straight to my head—and my body. Everything felt warm and soft… and horny.

  When he came back over to me, I told him, “I’m already relaxed…” I looked up into his eyes, which looked unusually dark.

  “Good,” he said, his voice low. So low, it gave me tingles all over. “Stand still.”

  Then he started undressing me.

  He slipped the thin straps of my dress off my shoulders, then reached behind me and slid the zipper down my back. Tingles drifted down my spine in the wake of his touch. He peeled the dress down and pushed it over my hips, where it dropped to the floor. Then he took off my bra, unhooking it smoothly in back, like he unhooked bras every day.

  He dropped the bra on the floor. My nipples were already hard, and it wasn’t cold in here.

  Xander’s eyes moved slowly over my body. He’d stripped me completely naked, and he did it all very… calmly.

  He didn’t say anything, either.

  And he didn’t touch me again.

  He went to turn off the bath water and said, “In.”

  I walked over and got carefully in the full bath, kinda thankful for the candlelight. He was still watching me. I’d never been totally naked in front of any man but him.

  The water was nicely warm, not too hot, and I sank in up to my chest, holding my wine above the water. There were no bubbles or anything, so he could still see all of me.

  He stood over me, just watching.

  “Okay… I’m in.” There was easily room for two people in the bathtub, but he made no move to get in. He picked up his wine glass. “What are you doing?”

  He sat down on the side of the tub. “Drinking.” I watched him take a slow sip of his wine, his eyes on mine.

  Then he just sat there, studying me. Though he kept his eyes on my face.

  “Uh… can you get undressed?”

  His eyes met mine. “Why?”

  “Because. I want to look at you.”

  He didn’t move, just sat there studying me with that same unblinking look.

  Then he got up and set his wine aside. He reached for the button on his jeans. Heat shot through me as I watched him undo the button and unzip. When I looked at his eyes again, he was still watching my face.

  He reached behind his head and gathered up his shirt, then pulled it over his head and dropped it on the floor. Then he hooked his thumbs in his jeans and eased them down over his hips. If he was wearing underwear, I couldn’t see it. Everything was on the floor and he was stepping out of his jeans.

  He was naked.

  And so fucking hot.

  His whole body was all sculpted and manly. His chest, his hips… everything about him was glorious and sexy. All his dark tattoos… the one down his right thigh. I saw the dark hair between his legs, neatly trimmed…

  I saw his dick. It was sticking out, not fully erect, but definitely kinda hard. It was big and thick. His balls were big, too.

  I looked away. My face was burning. My whole body was burning.

  I could feel my pulse beating between my legs.

  He picked up his wine and sat back down on the side of the tub.

  I looked at him as he took a sip. He was still watching me. I couldn’t see his dick anymore; his thigh was in the way.

  “Are we really having sex?” I asked him, sipping my wine. Just trying to be cool. “Or did you put sleeping pills in here or something? You know, just to shut me up about it?”

  “Good idea,” he said.

  I laughed a little, nervously, but he didn’t.

  “If you want to, we’ll have sex,” he said. “If you don’t, we won’t.”

  Okay. That was the exactly right thing for him to say.

  Definitely made me relax a little more.

  Though I definitely wanted to have sex.

  I glanced down at his muscular body, all sculpted and strong in the glow of the candlelight. He looked all statuesque, the shadows accentuating the curves and hard planes of his physique.

  He was such a man.

  “I never would’ve thought you’d be shy,” I said softly.

  “I’m not shy.”

  “You won’t let me see your dick.”

  “Where did you get that dirty mouth?”

  “I don’t know. Just always had it.” I smiled a bit.

  He didn’t smile. “I just undressed in front of you. If you wanted to see my dick, you had your chance.”

  “That was it?” I said innocently.

  “Drink your wine,” he said.

  “I don’t need to be drunk, Xander.”

  “You’re not getting drunk. You’re having one glass of wine.”

  “I’m relaxed,” I told him again.

  “Good.” He took another sip of his, then put his glass down. He slid over toward me, so he was sitting on the edge of the bath right above me. He took my wine from me and put it aside.

  Then he reached a hand down into the bath, right between my legs. His fingers slid down, gently, over my pussy.

  “Ahhh,” I gasped. I couldn’t help it. Warmth tingled through me. I melted, and his eyes darkened.

  He was studying my face, watching me as he touched me.

  His fingers drifted back up, then down again. He did it over and again, increasing the pressure just a little… This was way more gentle than he’d touched me before. He started moving his fingers in little circles over my clit, and I shuddered.

  I slid deeper into the tub. I grabbed onto his arm so I didn’t slip right under. I was probably making all kinds of weird faces. I was definitely making some embarrassing gasping noises.

  He just watched me, his fingers moving slowly over my flesh… seeking out all the places where it felt the most intense.

  Like he knew me.

  Just like the other night, in my bed, when he put his finger inside me and sent me to fucking Jupiter.

  He’s thirty. He’ll know what he’s doing.

  Holy God, Shay was right.

  “Oh, God,” I blurted. “I don’t want to come in the bath. I want to… ah…” I kinda choked on the words. Now that he was naked, and we were really doing this, and I wasn’t having to beg him for it anymore… it felt harder to say it.

  Or maybe it was the wine melting my brain.

  Or the pleasure making it hard to find the words.

  “Fuck.” Okay, I found the word. “I want to do that. Um. I want you.”

  Xander’s eyes looked all soft and spacey, like he was in a trance. He was looking at my mouth, but his eyes drifted up to meet mine.

  “I’m not gonna make you come,” he said. “If I make you come now, it defeats the purpose.”

  “Wha…?”

  “I want you hot before I fuck you.”

  “I’m… already… hot…”

  “It’ll hurt less, the more aroused you are,” he murmured, almost to himself. “In theory.”

  “What do you mean… ‘in theory’?”

  “I mean, it’s probably gonna hurt no matter what.”

  “Oh…”

  I knew that, right? Everyone knew it hurt your first time. But now he was kinda making a big deal out of it with all this preparation.

  If he was worried about hurting me, should I be worried…?

  “Are you worried?” I asked him.

  “I’m not worried. I want it to be good for you. As good as it can be.”

  Yeah… If it was gonna feel anything as good as what he was doing to me right now with just the tips of his fingers…

  Ohmygod.

  “Wh
at about you?” I gasped.

  “It’ll be good for me.”

  “How do you know?”

  His hand stopped moving between my legs.

  Uh-oh. Said the wrong thing.

  “What?” I whispered.

  His gaze drifted over my body, then met my eyes again. “You’re ridiculous,” he murmured. Then his hand drifted up my stomach, between my breasts, and up my neck. He cupped my chin, gently, making me meet his eyes. “Do you have any idea?”

  I didn’t really know what he was asking. So I just didn’t answer, hoping he’d say more.

  He didn’t.

  He handed my wine glass to me. “Drink.”

  I took a gulp of wine, then handed it back to him. “I’ve had enough.”

  He set the glass aside. “Then stand up.”

  I got to my feet, carefully, as he did; he took my hand and guided me up. He stood right in front of me, naked. I wanted to look at his dick again. I wanted to know if he was still hard. Or… harder.

  I didn’t look.

  I just looked up at his eyes. But then they drifted down my body, and I glanced down.

  Oh, yeah. He was hard.

  I looked away, not really sure what to do with that information.

  I just saw Xander’s dick.

  Again.

  It seemed very… large. At least, it seemed large in comparison with where he was planning to… put it.

  Like how was that supposed to fit inside me?

  I wasn’t totally ignorant about sex. I mean, just because I’d never had it, or ever actually touched a guy’s bare dick… or given a blowjob or anything… I was a modern girl. There was this thing called the internet.

  So I’d seen.

  I’d seen plenty. Plenty of dicks, in pictures and stuff. And I’d seen porn.

  I knew what was supposed to happen.

  And I knew every part of me wanted it to happen.

  It just seemed kind of… unfathomable. Physically speaking.

  “I think maybe we should just do this, quickly,” I suggested, as he reached out and pulled me to him, slow. It might’ve been awkward with the side of the bathtub between us, but he was so strong, he just kinda leaned in and wrapped his arms around me, and lifted me over it.

  He had my wet, naked body pressed right up against his naked body. My whole body slid against him as he set me on my feet, gently. But he didn’t let go. He was so big and hard against me—all of him. My breasts squished against his chest. My whole body felt kind of soft against his. And delicate, in a good way.