by M. L. Ray
“Of course. You’ve heard of PTSD?”
“Yep.”
“Well, there you go.”
It had been playing on his mind and he’d asked Anouk if she had ever felt like she was about to lose it like Martha had. Anouk nodded. “Sure.”
“Really? You never said.”
“Well, because I talked myself down. I was seeing Shawn everywhere, even though I knew it was impossible, that he was dead. A couple of times I really had to stop and talk to myself aloud.” She smiled at him. “So, I looked like a crazy lady anyway.”
He laughed but rubbed her back. “You can always talk to me, you know.”
“You too. We’ve both been through it.”
They heard Tabitha wail. She had been having nightmares lately and Anouk went into her and picked her up, bring her back to their bed. “Come on, snooky.”
They lay down with Tab between them, while she calmed down. Knox blew raspberries on her tummy which made her laugh and Nook stroked her daughter’s hair. “Bad dreams are just pretend, little one, that’s all, they’re not real. What was it this time?”
“Mommy went away.”
Nook and Knox exchanged a look. “I’m not going anywhere, baby. Not ever.”
Nook blinked back tears. “Is this because Mommy goes to work, snooks? Because you know I always come home at the end of the day.”
“I know.”
Nook chewed her lip and shot an anguished look at Knox. “Tab… is it the new baby? Because you know nothing changes how much I love you.”
“No, I want a baby brother.” Tabitha was convinced the baby was a boy.
Knox cleared his throat. “Tab… has anyone else said anything about Mommy going away?”
“No.” But there was hesitation in her voice.
They changed the subject then, distracting Tabitha and when she’d fallen back to sleep, Knox took her back to her own bed.
Nook lay back and stared up at the ceiling. She really didn’t want to think about what Tab had innocently implied. No, that was madness.
Knox came back to bed, closing the door quietly. He stretched his long body next to Nooks and drew her to him. He kissed her then studied her eyes. “What?”
“What if… what if Tab is hearing that Mommy is going away from someone else? Someone with an agenda?”
He stared at her then rolled away. “Nope, nah-uh.”
“What?”
He looked back at her. “We’re not going down Paranoid Avenue again. Martha is fine. She adores you.”
“I know she does but maybe, I don’t know, a filter is broken, and she means one thing but says it in such a way that Tab thinks…”
“Could that sentence be more convoluted?”
“You know what I mean, smartass.” Nook swiped at him but she had to smile. He was right. She refused to be one of those mothers who saw evil around every corner, or in this case, the recovering mental health patient who looked after her child. Whoops. She chuckled.
“What?”
“I’m a crazy lady.”
“Yes, yes, you are.”
Nook smiled at him and Knox kissed her and splayed his fingers over the small bump in her belly. Nook grinned. “Lower.”
He shifted his hand to just above her groin and she scowled at him. “Lower, boy.”
Knox moved his hand to her thigh and she growled and rolled him onto his back, straddling him. She peeled her camisole top off, Knox’s hand immediately cupping her breasts as she grinned down at him.
“What about these?” Knox tugged at her panties and she shrugged then yelped as, with a wicked chuckle, Knox bunched the fabric up in one fist and yanked them from her.
“Ow!”
“Suck it up, woman.”
Anouk snickered as he moved her onto her back and pressed her legs apart. She hooked a leg over his back as he pushed inside her and she shivered with pleasure.
She smiled up at him as he began to move and they rocked together, their lips hungry for the others.
“I love you so, so much,” she murmured, and he chuckled.
“Well, you’d better…”
Nook giggled then gasped as Knox quickened his pace. Her fingernails clawed down his heavily muscled back and dug into his buttocks, urging him deeper and harder with every thrust until they were both breathless and panting.
Nook moaned as her orgasm built and built then exploded through her body, every cell in her body electrified, fire in her blood as Knox came too.
He buried his face in her neck as he groaned, his body spasming and jerking with the force of his climax. “I love you, God, I love you,” he murmured over and over, and Nook wrapped her arms around his head as he settled on her chest.
Anouk fell asleep shortly after Knox, and when she woke, in the middle of the night, thirsty, she had to extract herself carefully from Knox’s arms to go to the kitchen.
She snagged a glass of water and was carrying it back to her bedroom when she saw Martha’s door open.
Her friend was sitting on the windowsill, staring out at the night, and Nook could see she was crying. Martha was clutching a soft toy and Nook recognized it as the favorite of one of Martha’s own children. Nook’s heart ached for her friend. Shawn had murdered his and Martha’s children to rid himself of the responsibility of them and make himself free to pursue Nook.
Nook had always borne some guilt over their deaths and she knew they were never far from Martha’s thoughts. She wondered if she should go into her, but then she heard Martha’s feverish whisper.
I hate you… I hate you…
Anouk had no idea who Martha was talking to: herself, Shawn or Nook, but she decided it wasn’t any of her business. Not tonight, at least.
Still, the worry lingered, and it was another hour before Anouk finally went back to sleep.
***
Venice, Italy
Levi waved at Cat Papini as he approached on the vaporetto. She grinned at him as he disembarked with the rest of the passengers. “I would have thought a Zapata could afford a water taxi.”
He smiled. “I like the vaporetto’s. What can I tell you, I’m a touristy slut.”
Cat sighed dramatically. “Well, at least, you’re some kind of slut.”
Levi laughed. He knew it was a dig at his utter failure to follow through on their flirting that first night, but he also knew Cat was joking. There was definitely chemistry there, but something was holding him back from sleeping with her. Cat had made it abundantly clear she was available for carefree, no-strings sex and, he had to be honest, he was tempted. It had been months since he’d been laid and maybe a fling with Cat would take his mind off of Juno Martello.
He’d called her the morning after the dinner with Arturo and Cat and she had seemed down. She assured him she was okay, but refused to meet him for lunch. “I’m sorry, but I have practice all day.”
He knew he shouldn’t be hurt, but she hadn’t called him in a week and he wondered if something had happened with Arturo. He hated that the thought of Juno and Arturo together made him want to throw up. Wasn’t Arturo his friend?
“Hey, listen, we’ve got a full slate today. My realtor contact has really come through for you, big guy.” Cat’s dark eyes sparkled up at him and he nodded, gratefully.
“I really can’t thank you enough for doing this, Cat.”
“You’re welcome. You can pay me back in kind.” She stuck her tongue in her cheek and he laughed.
“Subtlety isn’t your greatest strength is it?”
“Nope, but time is too short to be coy about these things. I’d like to fuck you, Zapata.”
Levi chuckled, and Cat grabbed his head and kissed him, her tongue darting into his mouth. Levi didn’t pull away. The kiss went on a beat too long and Cat was smiling when they finally broke apart.
“Now we’ve got that out of the way, let’s go find you a home.”
***
If Juno had
been in a bad mood when she left the apartment to meet Arturo, she was in a worse mood now. She sat in the café across the canal from where Levi Zapata and Cat Papini were kissing and felt the pain deep in her belly. She couldn’t look away and was still staring after them as they disappeared out of view, hand-in-hand.
She looked down at the cooling hot chocolate in front of her and stirred it for something to do. Arturo was late. And Levi was obviously sleeping with someone else.
Juno rubbed her face. You don’t even know him. Stop obsessing.
Her cell phone buzzed. Arturo.
“Darling, I’m so sorry, my taxi got rammed by another boat and it’s turned into a thing. The polizia are asking for witnesses. I’m sorry, piccolo.”
“It’s okay.” It wasn’t okay, not at all, but it wasn’t Arturo’s fault. But she hadn’t needed to be here to see Levi and Cat kissing. Fuck.
“Juno, I am sorry.” Arturo had picked up on her tone. “You know I wouldn’t abandon you if it weren’t an emergency. Are you okay? Can you get home safely?”
“I’m fine, Arturo. I’m probably just going to go to the company and rehearse.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah. It’s no biggie, really, Arturo. I’m fine.”
“Good. So, can I call you later?”
“Of course.” She hesitated. “You can come to my place this evening, if you want, I can cook.”
“I’d like that. I’ll bring wine and dessert.”
“Deal.”
She ended the call and got up, leaving some money for the hot chocolate on the table. The waiter, young and extremely good-looking, nodded pleasantly at her as she passed him, and she could feel his eyes on her as she walked along the street. She knew he was only paying her a compliment, and he seemed nice enough, but she hated it.
Girl, you dance around practically naked in a leotard and tutu. You should be used to people looking at your body. Juno was so distracted, berating herself that she didn’t judge her step right and she slid onto her bottom in an ungainly way. A young man darted to help her up, and she thanked him, embarrassed and with a bruised tailbone. She limped a couple of steps then sat down on the side of a bridge.
She rested for a moment then set off again, wincing as her sacrum protested. Hell, if she’d seriously bruised it…
No. Walk it off. So, she set out, following the tourists around the city, choosing random pathways. She knew this city so well that she didn’t care that she had no route planned, it was enough to just keep moving and ease off her aching back.
An hour later, she was getting hungry and decided to head back into the middle of the city. She would go to the company and see if Moriko or Jake or preferably both were around for lunch then she’d go to the market and get some ingredients for dinner tonight. A good meal was the least she could do for Arturo after being off with him.
She turned the corner and decided to head down to the canal to catch a vaporetto back to where the ballet company building was.
As she turned the corner, she stopped, her heart thudding so wildly she thought it must be audible to everyone streaming past her. Ahead of her she saw a tall man, his back to her, but she recognized that dark auburn head anywhere… but no, it couldn’t be.
Please, please, don’t let it be him…
As she watched in horror, the man stepped into the queue for the vaporetto, chivalrously allowing a group of women to go ahead of him.
Except Juno knew there was nothing chivalrous about this man, nor would there ever be. He was a predator, a creep, a man whose evil radiated out from his pores. A man who thought violence was the way to get what he wanted, and whom he wanted.
Tudor Welch.
Chapter Eleven
Venice, Italy
The moment Levi walked into the apartment in Santa Croce, he knew it was the one. The penthouse in the building, the wide, spacious rooms with high ceilings, the balcony with the floor to ceiling windows—yeah, he was sold as soon as he walked in.
Cat was watching him, a slightly smug expression on her beautiful face. “Told ya.”
“You nailed it.” Levi walked slowly through the apartment, breathing in the atmosphere of the empty rooms. Already he could see how he would decorate the place to his personal taste, but still keep the classic features of the paneling and the cornices.
Levi could picture a life here and he wondered whether he could ever be persuaded to go back to the States if he lived here. It was perfect.
He talked with the realtor who was delighted she’d made such a large commission, and then Cat bore him off to her own apartment on the Lido. Levi was cautious, wondering if she’d make a move on him as soon as they stepped into her home but to his relief, she headed for the kitchen. “Nothing fancy, I’m afraid, but we do have homemade bread and some cheese. I grabbed some fresh peaches from the market so we’re set. Take a load off while I get it ready, Levi.”
“Sounds good.”
He wandered through the apartment looking at the Papini sisters’ artwork adorning every wall. It wasn’t just the artwork that was a riot of colors; books on every subject were stacked high, vinyl records spread across the coffee table, and elaborate throws and cushions across the chairs and couch. It was comfortable, homey. Levi nodded. His design sensibilities liked this kind of chaos—it meant there was life here.
Lunch was a fun, flirty way to spend the afternoon, and it wasn’t until the apartment door opened and closed that Levi realized that it was almost evening. Cat looked up and smiled as her sister came into the room. “Hey, kiddo.”
Levi stood to welcome the newcomer. Isabella smiled a little warily, looking at her sister for an introduction. “Isa, this is Levi Zapata. You know Knox, this is his brother.”
“Hi, good to meet you.”
He was a little surprised when she hesitated before shaking his hand, and he noticed her smile had dropped. “Hi.”
Isabella Papini shot her sister a dark look and disappeared into the labyrinth of rooms towards the back of the apartment.
Cat sighed. “Friendly, isn’t she? Don’t take it personally. Isa can get very insular when she’s working.”
“What about you?”
She grinned at him. “Oh, I think you already know how I can get.” She got up, grabbed her pack of cigarettes and nodded for him to follow her out onto the balcony. The balcony looked over the water and the lights of the city were just blinking on. It was stunning.
Cat lit a cigarette and drew in a lungful of smoke. She studied Levi. “Is it the ballerina?”
Levi smiled. “Is what Juno?”
“The reason you won’t fuck me.”
“Who says I won’t?”
Cat grinned, no malice in her expression. “Because I can tell. You’ve friend-zoned me.”
“It’s not personal.”
Cat shrugged. “It’s okay, I won’t take it as such. Not many people turn me down.”
“I didn’t.”
“Not out loud.” She crinkled her eyes as she smiled at him. “It’s okay. I’d like to be your friend.”
“Already done.” He offered her a fist bump, and laughing, she punched it back.
“But tell me… Juno Martello. She’s a good kid. Beautiful too.” Cat blew out her smoke. “But one thing I did notice about her.”
“What’s that?” Despite his hesitation, it was nice to be talking about Juno to someone. Someone other than Arturo…
“She has walls.”
God, she was right on the money. “I get that too.”
Cat looked at him, a smile in her eyes. “But she likes you. A lot.”
Why did that make him feel like some love struck teenager? “I made a promise to her brother years ago that I would take care of her. That’s what my job is now.”
“You really are the picture book white knight then?”
Levi rolled his eyes, grinning. “Not exactly. But I want to take care of her. She seems vulnerabl
e.”
“Careful, Zapata. You might be treading on some serious feminist toes. Juno doesn’t strike me as someone who asks men for help often. From what Arturo has told me about her, she was pretty much fucked over by her brother.” Cat made a face then, looked apologetic. “I know he was your friend, I’m sorry. Some of the guys from art school, they went down the drugs route and wasted their talent. I’m with Juno. Fuck that shit. These,” she held up her cigarette, “are my only vice.”
Levi couldn’t help raising one eyebrow at her. “Your only vice?”
“Stop flirting with me if you’re going to keep it in your pants, Zapata.”
Levi grinned at her, liking this woman and her open personality. “I have to shut it down now?”
“Yup.”
“Got it.”
***
Juno lifted her head, feeling her body creaking from stiffness. She had run home after seeing… him… and had crawled into a corner of her bedroom, pulling her knees up to her chest and burying her face in her folded arms. No. No, he couldn’t be here. She’d got it wrong. She was seeing ghosts.
But you haven’t seen or imagined you’ve seen Ferdie… so why the very much still alive Tudor Welch?
She gave a moan. Her head was thumping now, and she realized she had not eaten or drank anything since before she was supposed to meet Arturo this morning. Now, she was unreasonably angry at him for missing their date—if that damn stupid water taxi hadn’t collided with that damn stupid gondola…
“Fuck you all,” she muttered now, rubbing the heel of her hands in her eyes, “fuck everyone and everything.”
This was ridiculous. She wasn’t a little girl anymore and Tudor Welch wasn’t going to wreck her life. Well, not this evening. She got up, stretching her aching limbs out. She’d been sitting there for hours. “Damn stupid woman.”
Her stomach gave an ominous growl, and she went into the kitchen and grabbed some leftover pasta from the fridge, shoving it unceremoniously into the microwave, and while she waited for her food to heat, she threw back a pint or two of water and some aspirin for her pounding head.
