The Defector

by J. C. Andrijeski

  “Is that really all you want?” Revik asked him, gruff.

  When Revik sat down next to him, Dalejem wrapped a muscular arm around his back.

  You don’t have to worry about me, brother, he told him softly. Truly.

  Revik nodded, forcing his shoulders to relax.

  Balancing his arms on his thighs, he exhaled again, then forced himself to let it go.

  He hated how fucking young he felt in his reactions to this.

  He hated wondering if Dalejem had slept with every seer in the camp, male and female, given that he’d worked ops with all of them over the years.

  When he glanced across the fire, he saw Mara watching them, a hard look in her hazel eyes.

  Revik didn’t let his gaze rest there for long.

  Even so, he felt Dalejem stiffen slightly.

  “Don’t play these games with me, brother,” Dalejem murmured, gripping him tighter.

  Revik shook his head, clicking softly. “I’m not.”

  “I mean it––”

  “I’m not,” Revik cut in, looking at him seriously. “I promise you. You don’t need to worry about me, either. I swear it. No games.”

  Dalejem studied his eyes, then nodded, visibly relaxing.

  “Okay.”

  Revik watched the seer drink the chikre, and a sliver of pain touched him again. He looked away, feeling that they were being watched by others in the construct. He didn’t look away in time, though… at least not before Garensche burst out in a low chuckle from a few yards away.

  “They are disgustingly cute,” he boomed in his deep voice, ostensibly talking to Vikram, but grinning directly at Dalejem and Revik. “I wholeheartedly agree, brother. It is quite vomit-inducing. We should seriously consider banning them from sitting with the rest of us.”

  From the other side of the fire, Ontari laughed.

  “That is not too extreme, brothers?” Ontari called out, winking at Revik when he caught his eye.

  “I do not think so,” Garensche said, his voice still loud. “If they won’t share, then I think they should take their toys into the other room.”

  “Don’t call the ex-Rook a toy in front of Jem,” Mara said, her voice holding a darker bite. “He tends to get touchy about that kind of thing.”

  Revik saw Ontari put a hand on her thigh when she said it, shaking his head perceptibly, and she gave him an annoyed look, pursing her lips.

  Dalai smiled at Revik from the other side of the fire.

  “Now that the Bridge is born, maybe the fact that Dalejem has given himself to an exclusive companion is another sign of the impending Displacement?” she teased, leaning against the chest of Nurek, who sat on the log with her. “I never thought I’d see the day, myself.”

  Revik frowned a little, glancing between her and Dalejem.

  He fought with whether to ask, when Dalai looked at him, laughing.

  “He was quite the rogue, your Jem,” she joked. “I think I can say, entirely without hyperbole, that Jem here had the absolute worst reputation of just about any in––”

  “Shut the fuck up, sister.” Dalejem leaned forward, resting his arms on his thighs and meeting her gaze with a predatory stare. “Now.”

  Revik heard the bite behind his light-seeming words, and glanced at him, frowning.

  “Worst reputation,” he muttered.

  Dalejem flinched, but didn’t take his eyes off Dalai.

  “We might need to have some words later, sister Dalai,” he said, his tone the same as before. He glared around at the others. “I might have to have words with more than one of you, in fact… since you all seem to have forgotten your manners.”

  His eyes rested for a beat too long on Mara’s at the end.

  Dalai herself only laughed, clicking at him.

  Revik could feel that Dalejem wasn’t amused.

  He no longer wanted to ask. Maybe in part to distract himself, he turned his mind to the other thing Dalai had said, turning it over in his mind. Glancing at Dalejem, he contemplated asking, and found the green-eyed seer watching his face, his gaze cautious.

  “The Bridge?” Revik cleared his throat. “That is confirmed then? The elders have finished their assessments of her light?”

  Dalejem nodded, making a “more or less” sign with his hands.

  His fingers dug into Revik’s back, massaging the muscles there deliberately, putting light into his hands, working it into Revik’s skin.

  It didn’t help Revik’s concentration much.

  It also didn’t help him with his light, which again seemed to be twisting out of his control. He felt Dalejem pulling on him, grounding him in a way, but while it reassured him on one level, it also made the pain worse, and made him more aware of his own instability.

  A part of him didn’t care about any of it.

  That same part was so wound into Dalejem’s light, he knew the others could see it, and could see the possessive pulling of it, the way that vulnerability practically shone in the space.

  Dalejem’s fingers grew stronger, more filled with light.

  Do not worry about me, brother, he murmured in Revik’s mind. Do not worry… please. They are giving us shit because it is the seer way to give shit to new couples, if only when those couples are serious enough to warrant it. You know that.

  When Revik only nodded, Dalejem gripped him tighter with his free hand.

  They also know we are both easy marks right now, which is an additional source of amusement.

  Revik felt his jaw tighten slightly, but he didn’t answer.

  He was an easy mark. A little too easy right now.

  Dalejem answered his other question aloud, after the too-long pause.

  “Yes,” he said neutrally. “They are saying it is her now. The Bridge.”

  Revik nodded.

  That information twisted his mind in other directions though, making him wonder at just how fucked up his light truly was right then. Staring into the fire, he fought to ground himself, trying to think through his reactions logically.

  There was no logic to this, though, not now.

  Remembering what Kali said to him by that swimming pool in Saigon, Revik fought with a sharper pull in his light, what felt almost like claustrophobia, mixed with a darker feeling he didn’t want to probe closely enough to see what it meant.

  Whatever it was, he couldn’t quite shake it off… nor could he eradicate the memory of Kali’s serious eyes, how sure she’d sounded when she told Revik that he’d have some kind of relationship with her daughter.

  Those words felt more like prophecy now than they ever had then… and they’d upset Revik at the time, too, for multiple reasons.

  That feeling of prophecy didn’t make him feel special, though.

  More, it felt like a train bearing down on him in the night, one he couldn’t see, couldn’t outrun… couldn’t avoid by changing direction.

  Revik felt Dalejem’s hands grow stronger on him once more, massaging his back, trying to get him to relax. Avoiding the seer’s gaze, Revik looked into the fire, following the sparks and flames with his eyes.

  He didn’t look up until Yumi spoke.

  Even then, he looked up only in reflex.

  She was watching him shrewdly when he raised his eyes. The tattoo on her face appeared to move strangely under the liquid orange of firelight.

  “It won’t be long now, brothers and sisters,” she intoned softly, her voice more serious than the others. “It won’t be long… so we should enjoy this time, this quiet before the storm. It won’t be long now. I feel it very strongly tonight. Since we got here, really.”

  There was a silence after she spoke.

  Then Ondati broke it, smiling at her, a cup of chikre clutched in his muscular hand.

  “It won’t be long for what, sister Yumi?” he said.

  “Before our lives change again.” Yumi turned her eyes to his, that seriousness even more prominent on her face, in her voice. “With the Bridge here, nothing is certain any more,
my brothers and sisters. Nothing.”

  She made an elegant gesture with one hand, then looked back at Dalejem and Revik.

  That time, a smile reached her eyes.

  “Only love is certain,” she said, her voice warm, along with her light. “Only love can take us through these times. Remember that.”

  Revik tensed at her words.

  He tensed before he even fully understood them, feeling them lodge somewhere in his chest, along with Kali’s words from five years before.

  Yumi continued to smile at him as he sat there, that deeper meaning shining out from her dark eyes.

  “Only love is always,” she said, quoting the same passage as Dalejem had, earlier that day.

  Revik sucked in a breath, staring at her.

  Next to him, he felt Dalejem’s light react, too.

  Yumi only smiled, her eyes flickering away, roaming over the rest of them.

  “Treasure it, brothers and sisters,” she said then, speaking to all of them. “Treasure all of it. For this world is not long for us now.”

  She raised her mug in a toast.

  Revik watched, unmoving, as the other seers around the fire followed suit, raising their mugs as she did, their faces as serious as hers.

  “Treasure the always moments,” Yumi said. “For they are rare. And while forever, they are fleeting, too. Especially in these uncertain times.”

  A more serious mood fell over the small group around the fire.

  Revik watched as the Adhipan infiltrators raised their cups in a silent salute, drinking to seal Yumi’s words within their hearts.

  Even Dalejem joined them, his mouth and eyes as serious as the rest as he took a long drink of the chikre Revik brought him.

  Only Revik sat there, unmoving, his fingers clamped around his own metal cup.

  He watched them all drink, feeling that dread settle deeper into his light.

  Twenty-Five

  Summoned

  “…Because she wishes you there, brother,” the Adhipan leader said, frowning down at Revik where he sat at a wooden table.

  Balidor glanced at Dalejem, who sat next to Revik and somewhat behind him on the long bench, then back at Revik himself.

  “She wishes you there,” he repeated. “So you will go.”

  Revik shook his head, without raising his eyes.

  He stared down at the plate in front of him on the table. Resting his arms on the wooden planks, he shook his head a second time.

  Or possibly the third time.

  “I don’t think it’s a good idea,” Revik said. “I don’t want to go.”

  “She asked for you,” Balidor said, exasperated. He looked at Dalejem again. “She wishes to speak with both of you, actually.”

  Revik looked up at that, face taut. “What?”

  He’d moved his body in the pause, almost without knowing he’d done it, inserting himself between the Adhipan leader and the man sitting next to him. He’d done it with his light even more than his body, and from behind him, Revik felt Dalejem smile, even as his fingers gently squeezed Revik’s shoulder, rubbing the muscles in his back.

  It’s all right, brother, he murmured. Relax.

  Revik glanced at him, feeling his face warm.

  Then he looked away from both of them, gazing off into the jungle without really seeing it.

  “What does she want?” he said finally.

  “She wants to see you,” Balidor repeated, his voice holding more of an edge. “It is a great honor, Dehgoies, to be asked for by name like this. She has given birth to an intermediary being. Moreover, she is an intermediary being herself––”

  “I understand that––”

  “Do you?” Balidor retorted. “Because this window is closing, brother. It has been over a month, and she is finally safe to be moved. She wishes to see certain people before she goes. She asked for you specifically, brother. You were the very first name on her list.”

  When Revik didn’t look up, or change expression, Balidor’s voice grew openly exasperated.

  “Brother!” he said. “She will go into hiding after this. You must know that. Do you have any idea how many seers would jump over any obstacle to be granted the honor you have been given? It poses a risk for her to stay here now. Extending her time here by hours, much less days, only increases that risk. Do you really not understand the gravity of that, given what this birth means… not just to her, but to all of us?”

  Revik felt his jaw tighten more.

  He didn’t look over.

  “They really do think it is her?” he said. “The Bridge?”

  “Yes,” Balidor said, impatient. “Yes, they think it is her. Kali has said so all along. Now the Council is saying it too. And Tarsi.”

  “What about Vash?” Revik said.

  “Vash is the Council,” Balidor said, exasperated. “Of course he agrees with this. If you ware waiting for an official pronouncement of some kind, you will be waiting forever… he cannot risk such a thing, given the target this will place on all of their backs. For you to even know these things is a huge honor.”

  Revik nodded, his jaw hardening. “Vash is absolutely certain then? Or is he merely deferring to Kali, given who she is?”

  Balidor rolled his eyes. “When have you known Vash to defer to anyone, solely because of who they are?” Exhaling, he put his hands on his hips. “And if you are looking for more precision than that, I am not at liberty to share his impressions, brother.”

  “Do you believe it?” Revik said, looking up at him almost accusingly.

  Balidor clicked at him, but some of the charge dissipated from his light.

  “Yes,” he said, his voice more subdued, more sincere-sounding. “Yes, I do believe it. Apart from Vash and Tarsi believing it, I have also seen things that convince me, yes.” Pausing, he added, “And I am learning to trust her… your Kali.”

  Revik winced at his phrasing, but Balidor ignored it.

  “She is definitely a seer of far-reaching sight,” Balidor added. “I feel no duplicitousness in her at all. Moreover, her daughter’s light is…” He trailed, his eyes growing distant. “…It is unique, brother. It is beyond unique. I believe Kali is telling the truth.”

  “Assuming she knows the truth,” Revik muttered.

  Dalejem squeezed his shoulder, exuding reassurance.

  Clicking to himself, Revik fought with his own light.

  He was still sitting there, silent, when the green-eyed seer pulled him even closer, wrapping his arms around Revik’s waist. Revik felt Dalejem look up at Balidor, but he still jumped when Dalejem spoke.

  “We will go,” he said, ignoring Revik’s flinch.

  His words were decisive, uncompromising.

  “We will?” Revik retorted, looking at him.

  “Yes,” Dalejem said, smiling at him. He winked, then his eyes flickered back up to Balidor. “When does she want us?”

  “Two hours,” Balidor said at once.

  Balidor hesitated, looking between them, as if about to say more.

  Then he seemed to think better of it, and simply walked away.

  Revik watched him go.

  Once he could no longer see the Adhipan leader, Revik turned his head, frowning at the green-eyed seer who sat beside him. His anger lost some of its charge when he saw the other’s face. He found himself studying the seer’s eyes instead, tracing the violet rings around the cooler shade of green in that sharp, intelligent gaze.

  “You are speaking for me now, brother?” he said finally.

  Dalejem chuckled.

  Leaning past him, he tugged Revik’s fork out of his hand, scooping up and then taking a mouthful of the pile of refried beans, cheese, and salsa Revik had on the plate in front of him. Revik couldn’t help reacting a little, watching the seer eat his food.

  In the end, he just watched him, silent, trying to decide if he was angry or not.

  Chewing and swallowing, Dalejem paused to kiss Revik’s neck.

  “Don’t be afraid,” h
e said. “You’ll be fine, brother.”

  Feeling what the other meant, Revik tensed.

  Turning, he gave Dalejem a harder stare.

  “You think I don’t trust myself with her?” he said angrily.

  There was a pause.

  In it, Dalejem studied his expression cautiously.

  Then he shrugged, placing the fork back on Revik’s plate.

  “I think you are worried about offending me, yes,” he said, matter-of-fact. “I think you are a little worried about her husband, too.”

  Feeling Revik’s anger sharpen, Dalejem wound his arm further around him, pulling him tighter against his body. He silenced him also with his light, even as he sent warmth into his limbs, massaging his chest.

  “I think you are happy,” Dalejem said, his voice a murmur against his neck. “I think you have not been happy for a long time, brother, but you are now. As am I. I think you do not want to do anything to fuck that up. And I don’t, either.”

  Revik stopped struggling at that.

  He stared into the jungle, thinking about Dalejem’s words.

  He couldn’t help but hear the truth in them.

  He lost his train of thought when the other male started massaging him more deliberately again, his hands moving lower on his body.

  “You won’t,” Dalejem murmured, kissing him. “You won’t, Revik.”

  Revik frowned, thinking about that, too.

  “How do you know that?” he said finally.

  He heard the bitterness in his own voice.

  He didn’t look back to see if Dalejem heard it, too. Even so, he felt the other seer’s smile, right before Dalejem pressed his face against Revik’s neck.

  “I won’t let you, brother,” he said, kissing him again.

  Thinking about that, Revik found himself sighing, relaxing into the other male’s chest. After another pause, where they simply wound into one another’s light, he sighed again, nodding that time, even as he closed his eyes.

  “All right,” he said, reluctant.

  “All right?”

  “Yes,” he said.

  Dalejem laughed quietly, kissing Revik’s shoulder as he slid his hands under his shirt. Revik felt the other seer wanting sex. He knew they were supposed to help Ontari and some of the others scout a Barrier anomaly Balidor had observed, what looked like a larger force coming out of a hidden base somewhere deep in Argentina.