Girl at Heart

by Kelly Oram

  “As long as you’re happy.”

  I smile into the camera so that he can see I’m telling the truth when I say, “I actually really love it.”

  “I do too. It looks great.” Dad swallows hard and clears his throat. He gives me a wobbly smile. “You look so much like your mother like that. She was almost as beautiful as you.”

  And just like that, I’m fighting emotions. Mom isn’t a taboo topic in our house. It’s been long enough that both of us have moved past her loss. But we don’t bring her up all that often, either. “Thanks, Dad.”

  I come out of the bathroom and shut off the light behind me. I’m about to leave the bedroom when the dress hanging on the back of the closet door catches my attention. I really must be a girl at heart, because I was so excited about being asked to the prom that I hung my dress on the back of the door instead of in the closet so that I could look at it while I fell asleep. “Oh, hey, check this out.” I turn the phone to the dress. “Look what I got.”

  Dad’s voice becomes serious when he says, “What is that?”

  I turn the phone back to me and waggle my eyebrows. “It’s a prom dress. Jace asked me to the prom!”

  Dad’s eyes widen, and I swear his face pales. “Heaven have mercy, she’s dating.”

  I roll my eyes and laugh. “It’s just Jace, Dad. Remember, you like him.”

  Dad narrows his eyes. “No eighteen-year-old boy is just anything. You watch him, and if he tries anything, you do those moves you learned in that self-defense class.”

  I snort. “Dad. I’m eighteen. I wouldn’t mind him trying at least a kiss. It’s about time, don’t you think?” (Sadly, I am eighteen and still have virgin lips.)

  This time Dad’s face really does pale. “No,” he pleads. “I don’t think it’s time. Can’t you put it off a little longer? Like, say, until you’re thirty? I’m not ready.”

  He’s joking, and he’s also not. “Sure, Dad. I’ll totally do that. Just for you. Don’t worry too much. The guys will be there the whole time. We’re all going in a limo together.”

  Dad sighs. “I suppose that’s a little better. The boys will keep Jace in line.”

  I roll my eyes, and Dad gives me a sheepish smile that’s half a grimace. “So the prom, huh? Let me see the dress again?”

  I love Dad. He may not know much about being a girl, but he definitely gets the dad thing right. I turn the camera on the dress again so he can get a good look. “It’s beautiful, honey. I love that color blue. It’s going to look great with your new hair. And the best part is it’s floor length, has sleeves, and a high neckline. Thank you for that.”

  I laugh again and turn the phone back to me. “Don’t relax too much; it does have a slit a little high on my thigh. Leila says it’s a shame to hide legs as long and toned as mine.”

  Dad looks worried for exactly two seconds, then he shrugs it off. “We can duct tape it.”

  I burst out laughing, and Dad gives me a goofy smile. “Sorry. Dad jokes. Real question, though. What about shoes? You’re not going to wear some ridiculously high heels and roll an ankle right before the state finals, are you?”

  Oh, crap. I hadn’t thought of that. The man makes a great point. I tried to walk in the shoes we bought yesterday. It wasn’t pretty. Leila told me to practice, but it’s not worth the risk. “Shoot. You’re right. I can’t wear those. I’ll have to figure something out. I’ll find some cute flats.”

  “I’m sure you’ll work it out. So when is the dance? Am I going to miss you all glammed up?”

  My face falls for a second. “It’s this Saturday. You’ll be home, but you’ll be at work by the time I get ready. We’ll take a ton of pictures, though. And you don’t have to worry about us partying all night, because we have the championship the next day. Assuming we make it to the finals, of course.”

  “You’ll make it.”

  I nod. “We’ll make it.” I hope. “And we’ll all be good at the dance. Promise.”

  “You’d better. But hey, let me make dinner reservations for you somewhere nice. If you guys come downtown for dinner, you can stop by the stadium really quick for a picture.”

  “There’s going to be ten of us,” I warn.

  “No sweat. Let me take care of everything.”

  “Thanks, Dad.” It’s time to leave, so I make my way downstairs. “Sorry. It’s getting to be that time.”

  Dad sighs. “Okay. I’ll let you go. Enjoy school with your new look. You’re going to give the boys heart attacks.”

  He’s biased, but I can’t help my grin. “Thanks, Dad.”

  “Oh, hey,” he says before I can hang up. I keep him on the line as I make my way to the garage. He gives me a huge, excited smile. “Turns out Sunday is an off day for the team, so I’ll already have the day off for the championship.”

  I set my phone on the center console in my car. Dad can’t see me anymore, but we can still talk while I drive. “Awesome. Makes things easier.”

  “Speaking of easier, do you think we can have the team party right after the game since it’s already an off day? I know that’s a big weekend with prom the night before the game, but do you think the team will mind packing in one more event into the weekend?”

  I snort. “The team won’t mind. Promise. If I open up the house to them, they’ll show no matter when it is. They’re all dying to come here.” I pull out of my drive and head toward the school.

  Dad’s laugh fills the car. “Should have done it years ago.”

  I sigh. “I know. I should have done a lot of things years ago.” That sounds a little melancholy, so I quickly bring us back on topic before Dad can ask what’s wrong. “Anyway, it’ll be like a great victory party if we win. Again, assuming we make it to the finals.”

  “Of course you’ll make it. And you’ll win, too. You’re my kid.”

  Dad logic. Hopefully he’s right.

  There’s a pause, and then Dad cautiously says, “So…I was thinking of inviting the team to the party. Is that lame?”

  I laugh. “Is having a bunch of Major League baseball players show up at a high school baseball team party with a bunch of fanboys lame? Dad. That’s awesome. The guys will freak.”

  “Okay, good, because I already invited them. Don’t say anything, because I’m not sure how many will show.”

  I shake my head. Dad and his surprises. “My lips are sealed. It’ll be fun to watch the looks on their faces when they show up and realize they’re partying with the Pittsburgh Pirates. Five bucks says Reynolds pees himself.”

  Dad laughs. “Well, I guess that’s what the shower in the pool house is for. I love you, baby girl.”

  “I love you too, Dad.”

  “I’ll call you after the game tonight. You’ll have to tell me all about how your first day at school with the makeover works out.”

  I grin. “Looking forward to it.”

  . . . . .

  My nerves hit me when I reach the student parking lot and have to get out of the car. For some reason, I can’t do it alone. I shoot off a quick text to both Jace and Leila.

  Charlie: Freaking out. Can’t get out of the car. Need moral support.

  Leila answers me right away.

  Leila: Waiting for you by the doors. You can do it. I’m sure you look gorgeous.

  Jace’s text follows right after.

  Jace: 10 seconds.

  I look toward the doors and see Leila waiting off to the side. Jace is jogging through the parking lot in my direction. When he taps on my window and gives me a bright smile, some of my nerves melt away. He opens my door for me and gives me his hand to help me out of the car. “Tell me the truth,” he says. “You just wanted me to open your door for you again.”

  I smirk. “You were on such a roll with it yesterday. Why mess with a good thing?”

  He laughs and shuts the door while I sling my backpack over my shoulders. Then he looks me over from head to toe. “I really do love this outfit,” he says.

  I went with the first out
fit I tried on yesterday—the denim skirt with the pink and white baseball tee and the pink hat. I left my hair down with the ends curled a little.

  Jace offers me his hand, and I take it. I don’t see the harm in holding it. I like it, and he seems to like it, so why not?

  Walking through the parking lot together, I realize I’m starting to like Jace. Like, like him. I don’t know what to do about it. Can I like two guys at once? Is that a thing? Or am I getting over Eric? How is that even possible, when I’ve loved him for years?

  As we make our way to Leila, I get a few curious glances, but I’m not sure if it’s the new look or if it’s the fact that Jace and I are holding hands. I haven’t seen anyone I know well yet, so no one is freaking out. Hopefully they don’t make a big deal out of it.

  Jace lets go of my hand when we reach Leila because she pulls me into a tight hug. “You look fabulous! Everyone is going to love it. Look, guys are already checking you out.”

  Leila points out a couple of guys who are indeed looking my way. I suck in a breath, trying not to blush or squirm. Jace doesn’t bother to hide his frown, and he takes my hand again, lacing our fingers together in a tight, and totally obvious, grip. Leila smirks, and I laugh. Jace just raises his eyebrows at both of us, daring either of us to say something. Leila and I share a look and burst into giggles.

  “Well, hello, lovely ladies. Jace, who’s your beautiful new friend?”

  I recognize the voice and snort when I turn to face Reynolds, because he doesn’t even recognize me. When he holds his hand out for me to shake, his eyes nearly pop out of his head. “Hastings?” He steps back and does an elevator look, running his eyes up and down my body from head to toe and back up again. “Dang, girl! Where you been hiding all that sexy?”

  I roll my eyes, but my cheeks heat up. If this is how people are going to react, I have a feeling I’ll be blushing all day.

  Mark grabs a lock of my hair and slides it through his fingers. “Love the blonde.”

  I slide Jace a bemused look. “Guess hair petting is a guy thing, too.”

  He laughs. “Nah, Mark’s just a freak.” He swats Mark’s hand away from my head. “Quit touching her.”

  “So you can, but I can’t?” He looks pointedly to our clasped hands.

  Jace pulls me closer to his side. “Yes.”

  Mark grins like the cat that ate the cream. “I see how it is.”

  And cue the blushing again.

  “So…” Mark rubs his hands together. “Who’s responsible for this?” He gestures vaguely toward my body.

  “Leila helped me.” I look down at my outfit and fiddle with my hair. It feels so strange to have it down. “Is it too much?”

  Mark shakes his head. “No way. You look awesome.”

  “Thanks.” I let out a breath. This isn’t so bad. Mark will probably be the most outspoken of anybody about the makeover next to Eric, Diego, and Kev. If this is the worst it gets, I’ll be fine.

  The warning bell rings, startling all of us. I didn’t realize we’ve been standing here so long. “Come on, sexy,” Reynolds says. “Let’s get to class. I can’t wait to see the looks on Cabrera’s and Springer’s faces.”

  Leila gives me one last hug and wishes me luck. Jace shocks me with a kiss to my cheek. My breath catches when he leans in so close, and my cheek tingles where his lips brush over it. He holds himself there for just a second, as if he’s purposely trying to drive me crazy. “See you in third,” he whispers in my ear. “You look beautiful.”

  Those butterflies escape my stomach and find their way to my heart, making it flutter a million miles a minute. Jace lets me go, and like the huge wuss that I am, I mumble “see you later” and practically run away from him to my first class. Reynolds hurries after me, laughing at me the entire way. My heart rate doesn’t slow down for a good ten minutes.

  Halfway through first hour, my phone buzzes in my back pocket. I can’t remember the last time my phone went off in class. I’m glad I have it on silent. I carefully take my phone out and hide it under the desk. Luckily, Mrs. Kendrick is playing a video, so it’s easy for me to not be seen. When I open my phone, I find a text from Eric on our group chat.

  Eric: Hastings, you okay? You bailed on the game yesterday, and I didn’t see you this morning. I waited by your locker. You’re not sick, are you?

  My chest warms. He waited to see me this morning. I miss him, too. I had to cancel watching the game at my place yesterday because of the mall adventure, so I haven’t seen the guys since Saturday. I know that’s only like two days, but Eric and I rarely go a day without seeing each other, and I feel like we haven’t been ourselves since he asked Shelly Turner to the prom.

  Charlie: I’m here. I was late getting inside this morning. Didn’t have time to go to my locker. I’ll be there at lunch.

  Eric: Everything okay?

  Charlie: Yup. Just running late.

  Charlie: P.S. Congrats (officially) on the prom court nomination!

  Eric: :)

  I barely get my phone back in my pocket before it goes off again. This time it’s Diego. Guess Eric and I aren’t the only ones not invested in class this morning.

  Diego: That was all Shelly. She’s like a promqueenzilla. She had to campaign hard for his unpopular, sorry butt.

  Eric: Whatever. You’re dating a freshman.

  Diego: WE’RE NOT DATING!

  Kevin: You losers almost got me detention. Talk about this crap at lunch.

  Kevin: Charlie, why’d you bail on us? Where were you?

  I shake my head. Of course he’d tell us all to shut up, then keep the conversation going.

  Charlie: I was at the mall.

  Kevin: Funny. Where were you really?

  Charlie: No, really. I was at the mall. I went shopping with Leila King.

  Kevin: You? Shopping???

  Diego: Leila King, Jace’s twin? The cheerleader? Dude. Hook a brother up.

  Charlie: Ha! What would your freshman girlfriend think?

  Diego: I HATE YOU ALL!

  Kevin: Hey, Hastings, you okay with the whole Jace thing? Because we’ll kick his butt if you need us to.

  The subject change is jarring. I have no idea what he’s talking about. There’s no way something could have happened between now and this morning that would merit the guys wanting to beat him up for me.

  Charlie: What Jace thing?

  The text thread goes quiet for a second, but the little dots are on the screen showing that someone is typing a message. After an eternity, Kevin’s message pops up, and I let out a soft gasp that has Reynolds, Springer, Cabrera, and Mrs. Kendrick all glancing in my direction. I bury my phone in my lap and wait a few minutes to take it out again. I stare at the text with no idea how to respond.

  Kevin: Everyone’s trying to figure out who Jace’s hot new girlfriend is. I guess a couple guys on the team saw him kiss her this morning before school. I thought he was chasing your tail. Never figured him for a player. Are you mad? Just say the word, and we’ll mess him up.

  What the what??? There’s so much going on in that text that my brain shuts down. I should say something. He’s talking about me. I’m totally the “hot new girlfriend” that Jace “kissed” this morning. But how can I explain that? Especially over text?

  And I’m not even going to think about the fact that he’s insinuating that there’s something going on between Jace and me. I mean, there kind of is, but I didn’t realize the guys saw it. I wonder what Eric thinks about it. Is that why he’s being quiet now? Is he mad? Is that why he texted me earlier? Was he worried that I was upset over Jace? Does he think we’re a couple?

  I don’t ask these questions. Nor do I explain the truth. I will. At lunch. I swear.

  Charlie: Everything’s fine. Don’t mess with Jace. We’re cool. He asked me to prom. Gotta go. Mrs. Kendrick keeps giving me the stink eye. See you guys at lunch.

  I’ll have to tell them at lunch—they’ll see it for themselves then anyway—but I need that long to fi
gure out how I’m going to explain myself.

  The world doesn’t revolve around me, and by the time lunch rolls around, I finally believe that it’s not going to stop spinning just because I got a makeover. The ripples I’ve made this morning are small. I wasn’t popular before, and I’m not now. I’ve turned a few heads and have had several people I hardly know come up to me to tell me they love the new look, but mostly, life has gone on like normal. It’s a relief.

  The only people who really seem to care are my fellow baseball players. Thanks to Reynolds setting people straight about the “hot new girl dating Jace,” the news of my makeover spread through the entire team by third period. Diego even risked detention again to text and ask what the heck everyone’s talking about. I sent one message to the group chat that simply said, “I’ll explain at lunch.” Eric is still being quiet, but maybe he was just in classes where he couldn’t sneak in any texting.

  The bell rings, letting us out for lunch, and Jace turns to me with a smile. “So, are you ready to face the team?”

  No. “Yup.”

  Jace laughs like he knows I’m lying. When I stand up and sling my backpack over my shoulders, Jace holds out his hand to me. This time I hesitate to take it. Jace drops his hand, but the smile doesn’t leave his face. He’s still as easygoing as ever when he escorts me out of the classroom and says, “You don’t want to hold my hand anymore?”

  I grip the straps of my backpack and focus on the chaos of the hallway. I can feel him watching me; I just can’t look at him. “I don’t know. It’s not that.” I force myself to meet his curious gaze. “I’m just nervous. I don’t like being the center of attention, and the whole team’s been talking about us, saying that you and I are…that we’re…you know…” I can’t get the words out, so I just gesture between us and hope he gets the point. “I don’t know what’s going on here, but I’m not sure I can deal with everything at once.”

  Jace places his hand on my lower back and gently guides me to a stop by a bank of lockers just outside the cafeteria doors. He waits until I look at him, then gives me a soft smile. “What’s going on here is that I like you, Charlie.”