Chasing a Familiar Shadow

by Aman Gupta

  “Back to the cell,” said Sam.

  “Vira says you’re on laundry duty starting today. You’ll spend the next two hours washing uniforms,” said the woman.

  “Okay,” said Sam.

  The woman escorted Sam to the laundry room in the next building. She gave Sam a uniform to change into and pointed her to her station. 7 women and 5 men were already doing their load when Sam arrived. Every uniform had to be dusted, washed, ironed, and folded manually. The inmates used to trade washing machine parts for contraband, so the warden made the entire process manual, except steam ironing, which was done in a closely monitored room.

  Sam was given 50 prisoner uniforms in a bag and told to complete it in the next 2 hours, before yard time at 1 PM. She was told she would miss her yard time if she doesn’t complete her share.

  The inmates working in the laundry room barely spoke to each other, but Sam realized there was a mutual understanding between them. They didn’t need to use their words to ask for something or tell something. Just gesticulating with their fingers and hands was enough. Sam saw a couple of women who were also doing prison clothes and tried to keep up with them. Though they had a much larger share to work with, they were still beating Sam.

  The process was linear, which caused an operational inefficiency. After Sam had finished washing the clothes in the first hour, she had to wait a long time for a steamer to be available. Nevertheless, she managed to complete it just before inspection. She was breathing heavily, as the mental and physical stress was extremely taxing.

  She went to the yard after changing her clothes. She looked for Gale, but couldn’t see him anywhere. She walked alone in the yard for the next hour, noticing the prisoners from both North and South wings. The Brotherhood wasn’t hard to spot. The words ‘Brotherhood Forever’ was written on the collar and the forearm. Literally. The leader was hard to spot as everyone looked like one.

  As she was lurking, she came too close and was stopped by one of the members. Sam tried hurtling away, but she was surrounded by two others.

  “Sorry, I shouldn’t be here,” said Sam.

  “Come with us, darling,” said the tall guy, smirking.

  The guards on the top of the tower usually faced the other way when it came to the Brotherhood. This time wasn’t different, either.

  Sam walked with them as they took her deep into their portion of the open yard. Pretty soon, Sam figured out there were over a hundred members in the Brotherhood, comprising of both males and females. Past the heavyweights who were bench-pressing using other inmates as weights, Sam walked ahead, observing everyone.

  Cutting through the crowd that had gathered, Sam was taken to a bench where four old inmates were sitting, two on each row.

  Sam stood straight as confidently as she could.

  “She was spying on us,” said the guy, who was holding her.

  “I wasn’t. The crooked face’s lying,” said Sam.

  “You dare speak,” said the guy, and smacked Sam on her face.

  Her lips started to bleed, as she fell. She gathered herself and stood up again.

  “What’s your name?” asked the bearded guy on the front row. He looked around 50 years old, the youngest of the 4, including a woman.

  “Sam,” said Sam.

  “Full name,” said the guy.

  “Sam Stone,” said Sam.

  “From where?” asked the woman.

  “Relax, Mart. She’s not a younger version of you,” said Fort, the oldest guy, sitting on Mart’s right.

  “Bunch of foster homes,” said Sam.

  “What’s your father’s name?” asked the woman.

  “He’s dead,” said Sam. “At least that’s what the cops said.”

  “Still, what’s his name?” asked Mart.

  “Where’s Gale?” asked Sam. She didn’t like talking about her father.

  “Is that why you were spying on us?” asked the fourth guy.

  “I was looking for Gale. I wasn’t spying on you,” said Sam.

  “Gale is currently busy,” said Mart. “You might see him in 3-5 days.”

  “Take her away, Daffy,” said Fred, stroking his beard.

  Daffy grabbed Sam and started dragging her away.

  “Hey, let me go. I’m not done talking,” said Sam.

  “Stop!” said Fort.

  Daffy released Sam. Sam brushed her hair and walked up to them.

  “I can help you break the Alliance,” said Sam.

  They laughed simultaneously.

  “Nobody likes a rat, sweetheart,” said Mart.

  “I’m not one. If I help you break down the alliance, you get me a seat in this bench of yours, while I look at the South wing for you,” said Sam.

  “Beautiful and ambitious. Shame, she doesn’t have any brains,” said Fred. “And what is this Alliance you keep talking about?”

  “I got more brains than you. One of the reasons I’m here,” said Sam.

  “Why, you good with computers or something?” asked Mart.

  “Yes,” said Sam.

  “I suspected as much. We got a hacker with us. Daffy, get Trista,” said Ford, the fourth guy.

  Daffy went into the crowd and returned with Trista a couple of minutes later. Sam hadn’t blinked since then, as she was determined to stamp her authority.

  “So Sam, you see, there’s only one spot for a hacker in our family. Trista got into the Brotherhood after she defeated our old friend in a fight. Now, if you wish to get into the Brotherhood, you need to defeat her,” said Mart.

  “Sure,” said Sam.

  “Then it’s settled,” said Fred.

  “Death Match will take place tonight,” said Mart.

  “Wait a minute, Death Match?” asked Sam.

  “Yeah,” said Trista, a blonde woman sporting a pixie haircut with shades of purple, wearing a sleeveless top and track pants underneath the orange prison uniform.

  “I thought we were going to showcase our hacking skills,” said Sam.

  “You both will. The winner will kill the loser,” said Fort.

  “No, I can’t kill her. I don’t want to be a part of it,” said Sam.

  “What a coward,” yelled someone from the crowd. Pretty soon, they all started yelling, ‘Coward!’

  “Daffy, take her away,” said Mart.

  Daffy dragged Sam away as she shared eye contact with Trista. Trista blew a kiss as Sam was being taken away. Daffy pushed Sam onto the ground when they got out of the Brotherhood’s virtual territory.

  Sam got up and walked away to the other side of the yard. Several inmates noticed Sam walking away from the Brotherhood’s portion of the yard. She made more enemies that day. Some thought she was a rat deployed by the Brotherhood to get them to join, but the others thought she was on Brotherhood’s radar, which was a dangerous place to be in.

  Sam was glad she was able to fake enough confidence to make it out of there without losing anything. She played the best hand she could out of the cards she was dealt. She made it a point to tell Brotherhood about her abilities so she could earn some protection if they ever get tired of Trista.

  During lunch, Sam decided to sit with Vira, who objected. Sam was forced to sit at her old seat, where Deathra and her sidekicks joined. Sam could barely eat. Every time Deathra or her puppets moved a muscle, Sam would move her hands to defend herself. They were living in her mind, and they were enjoying every minute of it.

  At the end of the meal, Sam knew she couldn’t let Deathra dictate terms much longer if she was to survive in prison. She already was in one, and she couldn’t let Deathra put her into another.

  Sam stayed in her cell the entire day, while some woman left to see their visitors. Sam didn’t know if anyone cared enough to visit her anymore. She lost her mother pretty soon after 1/1, and since then, she had been truly alone. She had recently found Jay but had lost him too. She didn’t know if she wanted him to visit her again, let alone if he actually would.

  While returning from the dinne
r service, Sam was cornered by Deathra and her puppets. They isolated Sam in an old room and beat her mercilessly. Several kicks, punches, and knife cut later, Sam was lying unconscious on the floor as Deathra took off.

  A couple of guards found Sam lying in the room, bleeding from her nose and mouth. They took her to the infirmary.

  **********************************************************

  The next day, Vira didn’t see Sam in the yard or the breakfast service. She saw Deathra smiling and laughing while licking her food. Deathra would always do that. She loved her revenge dish, even if it was made by unhygienic prisoners who couldn’t care less about what they were serving.

  “Where’s your friend?” asked Vira as Deathra walked outside the hall.

  “Right here,” said Deathra, as her two sidekicks walked up to her.

  Deathra tried to stare Vira away but slowly realized she was signing her death sentence. She lowered her eyes.

  “Where’s Sam?” asked Vira.

  “Infirmary. She fell,” said Deathra.

  She slowly walked away. So did her friends.

  Vira inquired about Sam through her sources in the infirmary. She was told that Sam was badly beaten, and would return only after a week.

  “Maybe we judged Sam too quickly,” said the woman who accompanied her.

  In the evening, Vira arranged a visit to the infirmary through her friend that cleaned floors in the infirmary building.

  She saw Sam was lying in the bed in the intensive care unit. Almost 30% of her body was covered in bandages, including her forehead and her neck. Her condition looked like it would take at least a month for her to recover fully, but the warden never kept any prisoner longer than a week in the infirmary. If it were to him, he would get rid of the department. The doctors in the department also didn’t care much about the inmates they treated.

  A couple of days later, when Vira visited again, she saw Sam smiling and talking to someone through the window. She noticed the guy was Gale. The entire prison knew the Brotherhood used to bully Gale around for their pleasure. Vira felt Sam must’ve visited the Brotherhood to ask about Gale.

  Vira knocked on the other window, and Sam turned around. She saw Vira standing outside the room. Vira looked at her for a second and left. Sam was confused but didn’t say anything.

  A couple of days later, Sam was released into the general prison ward early morning. She pleaded she was injured, but the warden and the guards didn’t care. Her expenses were creating a hole in the warden’s profit.

  It was around 10 AM when she was escorted to the breakfast hall. Sam saw Deathra looking at her. She could almost see Deathra planning with her sidekicks to put Sam into the infirmary again. She looked at Vira as she grabbed her tray. Vira shook her head. Sam was sad. The entire room had once again banded together and pushed Sam away. The meal wasn’t the most terrible part of the morning. Sam sat next to the only person who let her – the guy with the insatiable lust. He would touch Sam’s hands and thighs every time he ate a bite. His group of ten would smile every time he winked.

  As he got up, he whispered in Sam’s ears, “See you tonight.”

  There was genuine terror in Sam’s eyes as he and his friends walked by.

  Later, after completing her laundry work, she returned to the hall for lunch service. She was a little late due to a hold up for inspection. As she was looking around the room, which was nearly full, she could see Deathra had purposely left a seat next to her and her sidekicks empty. She was almost inviting Sam to sit next to her.

  Sam’s other option was to sit next to the one who whispered into her ears with his foul breath a few hours ago. Sam was distressed. The lunch lady noticed her.

  “If you let them eat you, you can’t blame them afterwards when they do,” said the lunch lady, who served her mashed potatoes.

  “It didn’t end so well the last time I stood up for myself,” said Sam.

  “The first time is always hard,” said the lady. “Sometimes, eighth time is the charm.”

  Sam nodded and left.

  Sam sat next to Deathra as Vira noticed. Deathra started playing her games with Sam. Sam kept eye contact with the lunch lady who reciprocated. Soon, Deathra was pissed as Sam wasn’t giving in to her antics.

  “See you tonight,” said Deathra as she got up.

  “Get in line!” said Sam as she threw Deathra’s tray.

  The guards looked at Deathra, who picked up the tray and apologized to the guards. Sam smiled as the guards took Deathra away to teach her some manners.

  “These two pushed her,” said Sam. “I saw it with my own eyes.”

  Sam had gotten rid of Deathra and her two sidekicks for the rest of the day, at least. It made her smile. The lunch lady smiled too when Sam looked at her.

  During the evening yard time, Sam was sitting alone in the yard when she saw Vira walking up to her. Vira sat next to her, but she didn’t say anything. Neither did Sam. She was still upset Vira abandoned her when Sam needed her.

  After a couple of minutes, Sam got up and started walking away.

  “You did well today,” said Vira.

  Sam stopped and turned around.

  “No, thanks to you,” said Sam.

  “Good. Nobody is here to protect nobody,” said Vira.

  “Sorry if I sound racist, but I don’t know what’s darker – your face or your heart,” said Sam.

  “Definitely my heart,” said Vira. “And for good reason. A hard learnt lesson.”

  “What are you talking about?” asked Sam.

  “When I first came here ten years ago, I had a spotless face and body for a 35 year old,” said Vira. “And now, when I look into the mirror, I don’t see anything but scars. On my face. On my body. On my soul.”

  Sam sat back on the bench.

  “You mean they did it to you?” asked Sam.

  “At first I thought that too, but later I realized they didn’t do anything. I did,” said Vira.

  “I don’t understand,” said Sam.

  “You think Deathra is bad? Wait till you face the Brotherhood. Your pretty little scars and facial wounds given by Deathra, would heal. These scars on my face, my hands, and my body won’t heal because they cut it that way. They want you to remember every single moment, every single thing that happened to you,” said Vira. “Seven times, it happened to me. Terrifying 7 years. Every day when I felt that they had stopped, they would start again. I waited every day for someone to help me, but no one came forward.”

  “So just because no one stood up for you doesn’t mean you can’t stand up for someone else. I thought we were friends,” said Sam.

  “Friendships, relationships. These things make you look weak. Listen to me while you still have your nose. In the end, you’re all that matters. Your body. Your blood. Don’t let anyone take it if you don’t want them to,” said Vira.

  “No, I don’t believe that,” said Sam.

  “How did you end up here? I bet you anything that someone close to you, betrayed you,” said Vira.

  Sam went quiet.

  “You think I didn’t help because we were friends for 1 day. My mother didn’t help me even though she was my mother for 35 years. Every day, she saw the terror in my eyes and the pain they put me through. But she didn’t lift a finger. I begged, I pleaded. If she wanted, she could’ve put a stop to it. But she didn’t,” said Vira.

  Sam made the connection.

  “The lunch lady. She’s your mother, isn’t she?” asked Sam.

  Vira nodded.

  “We haven’t talked ever since,” said Vira. “So tell me again how I am salty because no one stood up for me. I didn’t deserve to be here. A couple of unpaid parking tickets and a false charge for battery and assault. That’s all it took for the judge to decide, I deserved rehabilitation at Clarence, the place which the world’s most famous scum consider heaven.”

  “I’m good with computers. The reason that I’m here,” said Sam.

  “I suck at computers,
” said Vira. Sam chuckled.

  “Why didn’t your mother help you?” asked Sam.

  “I didn’t know. She always said one thing,” said Vira.

  “If you let them eat you, you can’t blame them afterwards when they do,” said Sam.

  Vira looked at Sam and nodded.

  Sam held Vira’s hand. Vira didn’t squat it away.

  “The Brotherhood did it to you?” asked Sam.

  “Yeah,” said Vira. “They tried again. But when they came for the eighth time, I defended myself as my life depended on it. I knew I would die trying that day before I let them get to me.”

  “And you won,” said Sam.

  “And I won,” said Vira. “It took me 7 years, but I finally won.”

  “Didn’t the Alliance help you?” asked Sam, inquisitive.

  “You know about the Alliance?” asked Vira.

  “Yeah,” said Sam.

  “No, the Alliance didn’t help me because it didn’t exist. Till I started it,” said Vira.

  “You’re head of the Alliance? No wonder they’re scared of you,” said Sam.

  Vira stood up and started walking away.

  “They’re scared of the Alliance because I’m the head,” said Vira. “And they’re scared of me because they know I don’t need the Alliance to face the Brotherhood. Only a couple of others know I’m the head, and they speak for me.”

  Vira left.

  Sam realized her mistake. She also realized gaining entry in the Alliance wouldn’t protect her if she wouldn’t protect herself.

  Chapter 24: Freedom

  During dinner, Sam sat at her old seat. The dinner service went smoothly as Deathra wasn’t around. There was one other hiccup. The guy with the lusty eyes, who was referred to his friends as Charlie, was looking at her every other second. She kept ignoring him. He got up and came up to Sam, sitting next to her.

  “In a few hours, I’ll be on top of you. Any special requests?” asked Charlie.

  “The last guy who tried that, woke up without his favorite part attached to his body,” said Sam. “You’re welcome to try.”

  Charlie didn’t relent, rather caressed her thigh with his rough hands. She tried to inhibit her anger. She was successful for a full three seconds before she couldn’t take it anymore.