The Hope of Love

by Platt, Meara

  Adam laughed. “He didn’t get a word in edgewise. His wife and her friends had plenty to say. Felicity will have her Christmas goose. They have more in mind, if I know those three.”

  Angus arched an eyebrow in curiosity. “What more?”

  “In truth, I’m not sure. They wouldn’t tell me. I don’t think they’ve formalized any plans yet, but they will soon. Don’t breathe a word of this to Felicity. It’s meant to be a surprise.”

  “I won’t say anything,” he assured, more out of cynicism than cooperation. He knew Poppy, Olivia, and Penelope meant well, but they had their hands full preparing for their own celebrations and for those of their staffs and the citizens of Wellesford. He expected they would visit Felicity after Christmas, perhaps once the servants returned from their own family celebrations.

  “How are you holding up, Angus? You didn’t get any sleep last night and won’t be of much use to Felicity if you’re dead on your feet.”

  “I’m fine.”

  Adam shook his head. “You are stubborn, and that isn’t at all the same thing. Go home. Wash up. Rest a while. I’ll watch over her.”

  “Leave you alone with her?”

  “I’m the vicar. If you can’t trust me, who can you trust? Besides,” he said, frowning lightly, “you’re going to leave soon. So, don’t make yourself too indispensable to her if you’re going to abandon her once the week is out.”

  His friend was right, but that didn’t stop him from being angry and unreasonably possessive. Yet, what right did he have? He’d be no better than Lady Plimpton if he took himself off and left her behind. He would come back for her; he’d make her that promise. But Felicity would never take him at his word. She had no reason to trust him.

  Everyone had excuses at the ready for disappointing her, hiding the truth from her. She responded with such joy and gratitude for the smallest crumbs thrown her way. Truly, he couldn’t bear it. “I’m not going to leave her behind.”

  “What?”

  “If she’ll have me, I’ll marry her first and take her with me. I can put off my departure until after the new year. Perhaps longer. As long as it takes for her to heal.” He didn’t really have to leave immediately; it was nothing more than a plan. Plans could always be changed.

  After all, he hadn’t been home in over a decade.

  A few more days would not matter.

  He would still be the new Duke of Appin whether he returned home tomorrow or in a year…or never.

  He marched into Felicity’s bedchamber. He must have been stomping loud enough to wake her, for her eyes were open when he reached her side. “Oh, Angus.” She cast him the sweetest, hopeful smile. “I must have drifted off to sleep again. I’m so sorry. I love the sound of your voice, it’s so soothingly deep and resonant.”

  “Felicity, there’s something…” Her eyes were wide, and her gaze was more loving and gentle than he deserved.

  “What is it, Angus?”

  “Something I’ve been wanting to do the moment I set eyes on you.” He lifted her into his arms with exquisite care and then bent his head to hers, kissing her on the mouth. He kissed her deeply, keeping his lips planted on her soft, plump lips. While he had to be gentle because of her injuries, he hoped to convey the depth and intensity of his love.

  He ought to have drawn away instead of prolonging the kiss.

  But he wanted her to understand that he was not going to draw away from her ever again.

  His tongue teased along the seam of her mouth, tasting her sweetness and the trace of tea on her lips. “Felicity Billings, I am not leaving you.”

  He kissed her again with exquisite care.

  After settling her carefully back against her pillows, he rose. “Would you care for anything before I stretch out by the hearth and grab a nap?”

  She gazed at him for the longest time, seemingly confused and obviously trying to make sense of what had just happened. After what felt like an eternity, but could only have been a moment, she chuckled. “Yes, another kiss.”

  Chapter Six

  Today was Christmas Eve day and Felicity resolved that she was going to be merry even though she was about to miss the Sherbourne party. The citizens of Wellesford had begun to stir. She could hear their footsteps crunching in the snow outside her window as they hurried to run the last of their errands.

  Angus had drawn her drapes aside as the sun began to sink on the horizon. From her bed, she could just make out the pinks and lavenders of the particularly beautiful sunset that marked the end of another cold, crisp winter’s day.

  “Angus, you really ought to go to the party. Take the vicar with you. I’m feeling much better and can manage on my own this evening.”

  “No.”

  She sighed in exasperation. “You cannot offend the Earl of Welles and his family. They’ll be expecting you to dine with them at Sherbourne. It is unpardonably rude of you not to attend after accepting their invitation.”

  Angus cast her another stubborn look. Honestly, he gave new meaning to the expression ‘stubborn Scot.’

  “I will not leave you alone in your condition, so don’t think to push me out the door. They won’t miss me at all. But you will.”

  She laughed. “Are you that confident? What if I were to tell you that I find you quite irritating?”

  He leaned over and kissed her lightly on the cheek. “I wouldn’t believe you. It’s obvious you adore me and are itching to get your hands on my body. The feeling is mutual.” “Angus!”

  “Don’t chide me for saying such things. I should have said them years ago.”

  The change in him ought to have delighted her. Well, it did very much. But it also frightened her as never before. The years had taught her to protect herself, build up those walls of stone around her heart so it wouldn’t break as people she cared for moved on with their lives and forgot about her.

  The vicar had said a surprise was coming yesterday, but nothing out of the ordinary had occurred. He had led her to believe her friends would come by to visit. She’d waited. But neither Poppy, Penelope, nor Olivia had come. Nor had any of them sent word.

  She tried to pretend their silence didn’t hurt.

  But her heart was breaking. Those three had pierced the thick walls she’d built around herself, smashed them wide open with their kindness and friendship. She should have known better. She wasn’t a beloved sister to them.

  How could she, a simple bookshop owner, ever be more?

  Angus’s insistence on remaining by her side was only making matters worse. He looked at her as though he cherished her. Not for an hour or a day but for a lifetime.

  I’m not leaving you he’d said to her.

  Which meant he had been planning to do exactly that. He was going to leave Wellesford, and he was going to do it soon. She’d overheard him and the vicar whispering about it. So why build up her hopes?

  Those protective walls she’d built around herself were now battered and shattered. She couldn’t bare it if he kicked down those last, lingering stones.

  She loved him, but did not dare admit it to him.

  “Felicity, you’re frowning again. Are you in pain? Where does it hurt?”

  My heart.

  “I am in the pink.”

  “You are a dreadful liar.”

  But he wasn’t. He was very good at it, hiding his love for her, and now suddenly showing her how much he cared. Which was the truth, and which was the lie? He was very convincing at both. So were her friends. Why hadn’t they come by yesterday? Not even a word. She would have taken any crumb they’d bothered to toss her way and been cheered by it.

  No, there had to be a reason for their silence.

  They were kind and generous, and she knew they liked her and considered her a friend…just not a sister.

  They had important lives to lead. Poppy was hosting the traditional Sherbourne supper party this very evening. Penelope and Olivia would join her and were probably helping her prepare. She couldn’t blame them for refusi
ng to toss their plans aside for her, for this Christmas was special for them, too. It would likely be the last one those three inseparable friends ever spent together.

  Olivia’s husband, the Duke of Hartford, seemed to be indispensable to the royal family, so he and Olivia would likely spend next Christmas in London. Penelope and her husband Thad, heir to the Earl of Hume, would likely be in Scotland hosting Christmas for their clan next year. Poppy would remain here, but if the hot looks exchanged by her and her husband were any indication, the Earl of Welles would have his little heir before next year was out and Poppy would have her hands full with the little viscount’s arrival.

  “Bollocks, how many times must I kiss you to get you to stop frowning?” Angus teased, stoking the fire in her bedroom hearth and tossing on several more logs before it sputtered out.

  The fire cast a rich, golden glow about the room and seemed to illuminate Angus as he strode to her side like a valiant warrior and gave her a shockingly delightful kiss on the mouth.

  She forced a smile when he drew away. “This Christmas Eve supper has me overset. I wanted so badly to be at Sherbourne Manor and wear my new gown. I wanted to be with my friends, although it is presumptuous of me to consider them as that. They are so high above my station.”

  His gaze turned thoughtful. “Perhaps not for long.”

  She frowned, not understanding what Angus meant by the remark. However, she shrugged it off. Her brain was too dulled with laudanum to think clearly. “Did you manage to get some sleep last night? You couldn’t have been comfortable stretched out in front of the bookshop’s fireplace.”

  “I slept like a log. When I awoke, I stole away home to wash up and change into clean clothes. I also checked the infirmary to make certain no one had come by looking for me. All quiet, thank goodness. But I expect young Walter Fitch will manage to get himself into a scrape soon enough, and his father will come running into town to find me.”

  “Oh, that boy!” The mere mention of Walter, that scamp, cheered her. “He has a knack for mischief. But he is good hearted and always means well. He’s clever, too. He already knows his letters and can count faster than his older siblings. And what a sense of adventure he has! I’ve been reading to the children at the schoolhouse, stories about wizards and kings, pirates and their sailing ships. Knights of valor. Walter sits wide-eyed and hangs upon my every word. All the children do. It’s quite splendid to see them so excited about learning and their young minds spinning with ideas.”

  She rolled her eyes. “Walter told me he has decided to become a wizard…or a pirate, he hasn’t made up his mind yet which. However, he has not ruled out becoming a king. Or Hercules. But he feels he has to eat a lot to build up his muscles, and he can’t do it because his mother’s cooking isn’t all that good.”

  Angus chuckled.

  She blushed suddenly. “You should have stopped me. I didn’t mean to go on about the children.” Especially since she would have none of her own, and she supposed the ache showed. Seems she could not hide anything from Angus lately.

  “You’ll make a wonderful mother, Felicity. Kind and patient and inspiring.” He sighed when she turned her head away and said nothing. “You will. I–”

  He was about to say something more when interrupted by the tinkle of the bell above the bookshop door. It must have shut and opened again, for it continued to ring. First, light footsteps skittered across the shop. Then it sounded as though an entire army was marching in. “I’ll go see what’s happening. Don’t you dare climb out of bed.”

  She sorely wanted to, but her body would not cooperate. Her left arm was broken and her right ankle was still swollen from its sprain. It made walking impossible for the moment. “Angus! Is it the laudanum addling my senses, or is that the aroma of roast goose wafting through the kitchen?”

  Angus was staring at the goings on in her bookshop, too busy grinning at her visitors to respond.

  Felicity bolted upright upon recognizing the cheerful voices…but it couldn’t be. “Poppy, what are you doing here? Your guests will be arriving at any moment! Oh, I was supposed to return The Book of Love to you this evening. It’s right there, on my bureau. I’m so sorry.”

  Poppy glided into her bedchamber, her dark woolen cloak swirling about her booted ankles as she came to Felicity’s side and plunked herself down at the edge of the bed. Her smile was as incandescent as the fire glowing in the hearth. “I’m not here because of the book, but I hope you had the chance to read it.”

  “I did. Several times over.”

  Olivia and Penelope traipsed in soon after, their noses and cheeks pink from the cold. Pip, who was Penelope’s impish cousin, was with them. Despite his penchant for mischief, he was a sweet boy, and Felicity liked him very much.

  Olivia took off her bonnet and set aside her muff before taking the chair near her bed. Penelope shrugged out of her cloak and sat on the other side of her bed.

  Pip hopped over her three friends and knelt beside Felicity, resting his arms on the mattress, his big eyes peering over it as he looked at her with a big grin on his face.

  Poppy took her hand, her touch warm and gentle. “We’ve reshuffled.”

  Felicity blinked. “What do you mean?”

  Olivia’s smile was also angelic as she spoke up. “It was to be a small Christmas gathering anyway. And our husbands could do with a night away from us. So the aunts, Lavinia and Matilda, will serve as hostesses at Sherbourne while we dine here with you.”

  Felicity gasped. “You can’t!”

  “We can and just did,” Penelope said with a nod. “You won’t be rid of us so easily. Olivia’s staff is setting out our meal on the long table in your bookshop. You needn’t fret, we have it all in hand. Can you walk? You look terribly banged up.”

  “She is,” Angus said from the doorway. “I’ll carry her in. She isn’t steady on her feet yet. She’ll just topple if she tries to walk.”

  Felicity’s eyes were bright and gleaming. “Why would you do this? Leave all your important guests to come to me?”

  Penelope arched an eyebrow. “Wouldn’t you do the same for any of us?”

  “Yes, of course. But I’m no one of importance.” She looked up at Angus as he approached her bedside.

  His eyes were glinting with affection as he approached and bent on one knee beside her. “Seems your friends hold a different opinion.”

  Olivia withdrew a little packet from her cloak. “We’ve brought you some gifts. We’d planned on exchanging them tomorrow, but I think Beast, Nathaniel, and Thad will howl if we abandon them on Christmas day as well.” She handed Felicity the packet. “Here, open it now if you like.”

  She took it with a whispered ‘thank you’ and unwrapped it. “They’re beautiful,” she said, holding up a set of embroidered, lace handkerchiefs.

  Penelope dipped into her cloak and withdrew her own packet. “This is from me and Lavinia. We were in Oxford and came across the loveliest perfume shop. This scent is frankincense, it’s a little pine and lemon and fragrant wood. And this one is myrrh.”

  Smiling, Felicity opened the decorative bottle and inhaled lightly. “This one reminds me of black licorice. My favorite!”

  Poppy reached into her muff and withdrew her own packet. “This is from me and Nathaniel.”

  Felicity opened it and gasped. “A locket! Oh, Poppy, it’s beautiful.” It was too much, a gold locket in the shape of a heart. She held it up to show the vicar who had just come into the room and was now staring at them all with a look of utter confusion on his face.

  “Blessed saints,” he said hoarsely, continuing to stare, now with his mouth agape.

  Felicity smiled at him. “Vicar, isn’t it wonderful? I think this shall be my best Christmas ever.” She held up the locket, smiling as it shone brilliantly when caught in the glow of firelight. She showed him the other gifts, then opened up the locket. Tears welled in her eyes, for painted inside were miniature portraits of the three ladies.

  “Blessed saints,�
�� the vicar repeated in a breathless whisper, still staring at them so oddly, Felicity was beginning to worry that he’d bumped his head and was now dazed.

  Angus frowned. “Adam, what’s wrong? You’re pale as the snow and your hands are trembling. You’re starting to worry all of us. Say something.”

  He shook his head. “Do you not see what I see?”

  They all glanced at each other before turning back to him, still at a loss. Angus cleared his throat. “Apparently, we don’t. Care to explain?”

  “The Nativity. You,” he said to Angus, “and Felicity. Yes, she’s in bed because of a broken arm…but you’re by her side. And the child, Pip, is… And the three Magi.” He smiled at Poppy, Penelope, and Olivia. “The three wise women in this instance. Bearing gifts. Bearing gold, frankincense, and myrrh. Oh, Lord.” He raked a hand through his hair. “Truly. Oh, Lord.”

  Angus rose to go to his friend, but Adam waved him away with a tearful smile. “Your place is beside Felicity. Happy Christmas, my friend. I need to take a long walk and think. You need to think as well, but not too long. She’s a jewel. Don’t let her get away.”

  “I won’t, Adam. I’ll take care of it tonight. Are you sure you’ll be all right?”

  “Yes.” He turned to look at Felicity, nodding a silent farewell to her. “Yes, my friend. Better than all right.”

  Felicity cast Angus the sweetest, loving smile. “What are you going to take care of tonight?”

  Chapter Seven

  “I’d appreciate it if you all stopped gawking at me,” Angus said, approaching Felicity and ignoring her gasp and that of their audience as he slowly bent on one knee and reached into his breast pocket.

  He’d wanted a moment of privacy, but doubted it would happen tonight.

  Everyone in Wellesford would learn the news within five minutes anyway, so he decided to plunge in now. “Felicity…love.”

  She put a hand to her throat. The pulse at the base of her neck appeared to be beating wildly. “Oh, my.”