Here and Now and Then

by Mike Chen

  Old holo tech, probably from the turn of the millennium or before, back when it was more of a 3-D projection than a hologram. Despite the occasional visual hiccup or distortion, the woman before them was clear.

  It was Miranda.

  Not the Miranda he knew. Not the wily teen or the confident woman they’d saved. This was a Miranda with decades of life etched into the wrinkles of her face, her once-black hair withered into short gray waves. She smiled, her mouth pushing into well-worn crevices that only years and years of use could produce.

  She looked happy.

  No, it wasn’t happy. He’d seen her happy countless times, and her expressions repeated themselves throughout her life, despite age and maturity. This was more than happiness. He leaned in, allowing the image to burn into his mind until everything clicked.

  This Miranda, the elder version of the girl he once knew, was content.

  “Hello, Dad. When I left you and Penny, you saved my life. If you’re seeing this, then I’ve finally been able to return the favor.” She paused, taking a breath and looking off center. “I hope Penny is with you right now. Hi, Penny.”

  The awestruck stare on Penny’s face broke into something softer, something that matched the little wave she offered the glowing holo. “Hello, Miranda,” she said softly.

  “Miranda?” the man said.

  “Name change. Long story,” Kin offered while lingering on his daughter’s image.

  “And so here we are,” she said. The image talked straight into the camera, and although she barely moved, every syllable felt full of life. “It’s a Saturday. January 2, 2103. I lived to see the millennium. I’m in a little village outside Bath. This is where I lived after a few stops in London, Paris, Manchester, and London again. I even learned to like coffee with honey. Oh, and I want you to know my name. I know you said you couldn’t know it. Well, I’ve lived a full, good life. Ask the young man—well, I suppose he’s not that young anymore, but ask the man who brought this. My grandson, Julius, the doctor. He’s going to graduate from med school in a few months. Ever since he told me he wanted to be a doctor, I thought about this. I thought about you. I suppose I’ll never know if this actually gets to you. It’d be nice to get a simple yes or no answer. Guess you have to leave some things to mystery, right?

  “So now we meet again. The most important thing for you to know is that I was happy, I am happy, and I owe that to you. And any messages or money or whatever you might send my way might alter that, so please don’t do it. I don’t want to change a single thing. I only want you to know what I did with my life. You understand, Dad? I’m giving you a chance to learn who I was as long as you don’t try to rescue me. Not anymore. I don’t need it. And I think—I hope—that’s good enough for you. Deal?”

  The image of Miranda lingered, and it took several seconds for Kin to realize that the visual was on a short loop of her waiting. “Oh,” Julius said, “her note said that you had to make a decision. It’s programmed to detect your answer.”

  Everything taken from them, everything risked in a literal race against time, all of that was now on the table. Kin could learn her identity, and if fate somehow gave him the opportunity to jump one more time, he might see her again. Maybe even more than that.

  Except that wasn’t what she wanted. In fact, the very temptation might jeopardize the life she had lived. Her question pleaded to control her own path for once, to finally free herself from the external forces imposing their will on her fate. And it meant that by agreeing to her terms, he would let his daughter go.

  But in a way, he’d finally be letting her in.

  Wasn’t that the point all along?

  Kin let out a quiet “yes,” as if the projection was a portal across time rather than a recording.

  The holo resumed, Miranda offering a warm smile. “Thank you. I’m so glad. When I left you, I became Veronica Bamford. Bamford. I miss that dog.”

  Bamford. Of course—Markus picked the name.

  “I bought a ticket to London with nothing but a passport and cash. I’d always wanted to go to London, you know. That night I started fresh. I lived to see a cure for cancer, but unfortunately not those wonderful metabolizers you talked about. So you can’t win them all.” She gave a short laugh and looked off for a moment, perhaps wondering what those metabolizers might have done for her if she’d held on for another decade. “That day I began my second life, and here is how it unfolded...”

  * * *

  They stayed for the next hour, Kin, Penny, and Julius sitting around the glowing holo like an electronic campfire. “There’s one more thing,” Miranda said. “There’s only so much I can fit in this recording. But since we parted, I’ve wondered how I could tell you everything. Then it dawned on me. All those years ago, when I used your journal, I thought I did it out of spite. It wasn’t that. I realized that deep down, under all the hurt and anger, I just wanted to have a piece of you with me. Now it’s your turn. Julius, the box.”

  Julius stood up and motioned Kin over, then flipped open his bag before pulling out a small black cube, something that neatly sat in the palm of his hand.

  “I’ve worked on sixteen video games in my career. Taught programming for eight years at two different schools. Yet I think this is my greatest accomplishment. Not just to hear me tell it or to see holograms, but an interactive experience so that you can live it. My life after my life ended, that is. Almost like being there.” Miranda smiled, the creases in her face seemingly lightening with the gesture, then faded out of existence, leaving them only with the pinks and blues creeping into the light above them.

  Kin took the cube from Julius. A single button sat at the base of one side, and when he pressed it, a floating image illuminated the space around them.

  An airport terminal.

  Near the bottom of the holo sat glowing blue characters: 11:59 p.m. August 28, 2030. An arrow appeared on the image, and Kin tapped it with his finger, setting forth a virtual walk toward the gate. The holo moved through Miranda’s virtual eyes, and Kin angled the view around, pausing on the sign next to the window.

  Departure for London, England / HEATHROW.

  Penny crouched down next to him, one arm wrapped around his shoulders. Her cheek brushed against his, and he could hear her suck in a breath as she looked.

  “We went through all of this to give her a chance to live,” Kin said. He hit the cube’s power button again, dismissing the hologram before clutching the black box against his chest with the delicate tightness of holding a newborn baby. “And because of it, I’ll finally discover who she really is.”

  They remained in silence, sinking into the moment: a quiet morning on a hillside, the culmination of moments that spanned a century and a half. But now, finally, it was finished.

  Julius turned to Kin, his voice dry. “That was her story. But that doesn’t explain you. She called you ‘Dad.’ You’re younger than me. And how did she know to send me here?”

  “This is where Markus usually says something about the rules,” Penny said, her head still on Kin’s shoulder.

  “I think we can throw the rules out this time.”

  “The rules.” Penny’s nose wrinkled as she looked Kin’s way. “We heard Julius’s voice before we made the jump. So he was already here before we went there. Isn’t that some sort of paradox? The grandfather thing?”

  Kin scanned the scene before them: a clear view of skycar traffic in the distance. The last gasps of darkness before dusk. City lights twinkling away below them. No giant holes ripping open the space-time continuum, no implosion of the universe or the destruction of everything they knew, no sudden appearances from TCB’s Paradox Prevention squad. “Well, either the space-time continuum is about to collapse or things are going to be okay. Who knows?” A breeze ruffled through the air, causing the blades of grass and thin weeds to sway around them. “Either way, don’t tell Markus.” From
the wisps of light over the horizon, Kin guessed it was coming up around six o’clock. “Sorry I tried to choke you out.”

  “He did that to my brother, too,” Penny said with a smirk. “Welcome to the family.”

  CHAPTER 35

  Kin used to be a time-traveling secret agent.

  That was easy compared to the task he had to complete tonight.

  Veronica’s eyes opened with an intensity that belied the far-too-early time. She’d squirmed for a few minutes, rolling left and right with limbs doing everything except staying still. When Kin tried to get one leg down, the other kicked up; when both settled down, arms flailed up. The act of putting pajamas back on after changing a diaper proved to be as tough as chasing criminals across time. And no amount of planning or visual scanning would help.

  This little one had some fight in her. And a grimace to match.

  Kin knew the expression well. She’d only been around for five weeks, though he and Penny had learned Veronica’s cues and tics, and the big, bright stare meant that the newborn was mere seconds away from a hunger cry.

  Above her bassinet, an image of Miranda watched over Veronica—her half sister, technically. The old-fashioned picture frame reflected the moonlight creeping in from the angled window blinds—vintage, they called it these days, with physical prints trendy again. Two images of Miranda greeted him; the left frame holding her high school portrait, the Miranda that he’d left; and in the right frame was an old woman, life aged into her wrinkles and smile, the image captured off the holo she’d made during her final days. In between the two sat a weathered old coin. The sight of it relaxed him, and on instinct, he kissed two fingers and planted them on the penny, just for luck.

  Some things hadn’t changed since the first time he became a father. For him, only about sixteen years had passed since he first gave bottles to Miranda as a baby, but from the perspective of the world, a century had come and gone. Kin tested the bottle’s temperature on the underside of his wrist before setting it on the dresser and peering into the crib.

  Veronica wriggled on her back, gurgling noises swapping in and out with the heaving of infant cries. “I know, I know,” he said, picking her up and giving her a little bounce. “I’m not Mom. But it’s my turn, and bottles are almost as good as the real thing.” His words didn’t seem to satisfy Veronica, and the volume turned up on the tears. “Shh, come on. This move worked all the time on Miranda.”

  Bounces and sweet talk didn’t offer any consolation to the crying baby, so Kin went straight for the good stuff and grabbed the bottle off the dresser. “I don’t take offense. I cry when I’m hungry, too.” Thirty minutes passed, the only noise coming from the baby swallowing each gulp. “You think that’s good,” he said halfway through, “wait till you start eating solid foods. There’s this restaurant that books tables weeks in advance but I know the chef. I can get you a good spot.” Before the bottle was empty, Veronica passed out, mouth half-open and hand clasped around Kin’s pinky finger.

  Penny appeared, or at least her pajama-wearing holo did in the nursery’s communication panel. She pointed to Kin and offered an inquisitive yet silent check-in, eyebrows raised with a hopeful thumbs-up. Kin nodded and mouthed “go back to sleep.” Penny smiled and mouthed the words “love you” before disappearing.

  He could put her back down in her crib; Veronica was thankfully a sound sleeper, unlike Miranda at the same age. But Kin had learned to appreciate these little moments in time, even middle-of-the-night bottle-feedings. The baby moved in his arms, shifting her weight and turning up over Kin’s shoulder as if she wanted to see the lucky penny. Her eyes opened and shut in a flash before she returned to sleep, though he felt wide-awake despite the hour.

  Perhaps he’d finally watch Star Trek II.

  Yes, perhaps he would.

  He chuckled to himself, just loud enough for the infant’s eyes to flutter. With the past and future surrounding him, Kin leaned back in the chair, Bartók’s Rhapsody No. 1 playing softly. A smile emerged as he rocked back and forth with Veronica.

  After all, the here and now was a fine place to be.

  * * *

  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

  First off, thank you for reading!

  Books aren’t created in a vacuum, and that’s doubly true for debuts. It’s a long road from idea to agented to published with many people to thank on this journey...

  To Mandy, my companion in the TARDIS, thank you for putting up with me in so many ways, including the strange solitude required for writing and editing. Also, thank you for being awesome. You are truly an N7-class partner.

  To Amelia, thank you for simply being you. I hope you inspire stories forever.

  To my nonwriter friends and family, I know I hardly talk about book stuff but thank you for your support during our awkward conversations about it. Guess I’m gonna have to get used to it.

  This book would not exist without two great publishing professionals: my agent, Eric Smith, who believed in this book even when I didn’t (and who sends me coupons for video games), and my editor, Michelle Meade, who had an infectious enthusiasm for this story from day one while pushing the manuscript further (and rightly having me cut subplots).

  Thank you to my writing support team: to Sierra Godfrey, who has been there since the beginning and suffered through some truly terrible manuscripts. To TeamRocks past and present in all our waterfall glory—laughs, venting, advice, Seinfeld gifs, and Canadian candy (the last two courtesy of Rebecca Phillips). Also, extra thanks to Diana Urban, Sangu Mandanna, Laurel Amberdine, Dave Connis, Rebecca Enzor, and Samira Ahmed for fast reading and feedback. To my gripe-and-write pals, thank you so much for listening and supporting, particularly Jessica Sinsheimer, Kristen Lippert-Martin, and Randy Ribay (and our weekly In-N-Out cheeseburgers).

  Extra special thanks to Kat Howard, whose impeccable insight really unearthed the heart of this story.

  To Idris Elba, Jenna Coleman, Karen Gillan, Arthur Darvill, River the Dog, and Akasha the Cat, thanks for starring in the movie of this, at least the one in my mind.

  To everyone behind the sci-fi stories that have powered my thoughts and dreams my entire life, thank you. Allons-y!

  Finally, years ago in Olson Hall at UC Davis, my creative writing teacher Wendy Sheanin encouraged me to switch majors from Mechanical Engineering to English after the quarter. I didn’t, but she still offered one more nugget: “Keep writing.”

  Thanks Wendy, I took your advice. Hope you’ve enjoyed the result. (Go Ags.)

  ISBN-13: 9781488099588

  Here and Now and Then

  Copyright © 2019 by Mike Chen

  All rights reserved. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the nonexclusive, nontransferable right to access and read the text of this ebook on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereafter invented, without the express written permission of the publisher, Harlequin Enterprises Limited, 22 Adelaide St. West, 40th Floor, Toronto, Ontario M5H 4E3, Canada.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental. This edition published by arrangement with Harlequin Books S.A.

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