Psmith, Journalist
Page 15
CHAPTER XV
AN ADDITION TO THE STAFF
Penetrating into the Kid's dressing-room some moments later, theeditorial staff found the winner of the ten-round exhibition boutbetween members of the club seated on a chair, having his right legrubbed by a shock-headed man in a sweater, who had been one of hisseconds during the conflict. The Kid beamed as they entered.
"Gents," he said, "come right in. Mighty glad to see you."
"It is a relief to me, Comrade Brady," said Psmith, "to find thatyou can see us. I had expected to find that Comrade Wolmann'spurposeful buffs had completely closed your star-likes."
"Sure, I never felt them. He's a good quick boy, is Al., but,"continued the Kid with powerful imagery, "he couldn't hit a hole ina block of ice-cream, not if he was to use a hammer."
"And yet at one period in the proceedings, Comrade Brady," saidPsmith, "I fancied that your head would come unglued at the neck.But the fear was merely transient. When you began to administerthose--am I correct in saying?--half-scissor hooks to the body,why, then I felt like some watcher of the skies when a new planetswims into his ken; or like stout Cortez when with eagle eyes hestared at the Pacific."
The Kid blinked.
"How's that?" he inquired.
"And why did I feel like that, Comrade Brady? I will tell you.Because my faith in you was justified. Because there before mestood the ideal fighting-editor of _Cosy Moments_. It is not a postthat any weakling can fill. There charm of manner cannot qualify aman for the position. No one can hold down the job simply by havinga kind heart or being good at farmyard imitations. No. We want aman of thews and sinews, a man who would rather be hit on the headwith a half-brick than not. And you, Comrade Brady, are such aman."
The Kid turned appealingly to Billy.
"Say, this gets past me, Mr. Windsor. Put me wise."
"Can we have a couple of words with you alone, Kid?" said Billy."We want to talk over something with you."
"Sure. Sit down, gents. Jack'll be through in a minute."
Jack, who during this conversation had been concentrating himselfon his subject's left leg, now announced that he guessed that wouldabout do, and having advised the Kid not to stop and pick daisies,but to get into his clothes at once before he caught a chill, badethe company good night and retired.
Billy shut the door.
"Kid," he said, "you know those articles about the tenements we'vebeen having in the paper?"
"Sure. I read 'em. They're to the good."
Psmith bowed.
"You stimulate us, Comrade Brady. This is praise from Sir HubertStanley."
"It was about time some strong josher came and put it across to'em," added the Kid.
"So we thought. Comrade Parker, however, totally disagreed withus."
"Parker?"
"That's what I'm coming to," said Billy. "The day before yesterdaya man named Parker called at the office and tried to buy us off."
Billy's voice grew indignant at the recollection.
"You gave him the hook, I guess?" queried the interested Kid.
"To such an extent, Comrade Brady," said Psmith, "that he leftbreathing threatenings and slaughter. And it is for that reasonthat we have ventured to call upon you."
"It's this way," said Billy. "We're pretty sure by this time thatwhoever the man is this fellow Parker's working for has put one ofthe gangs on to us."
"You don't say!" exclaimed the Kid. "Gum! Mr. Windsor, they'retough propositions, those gangs."
"We've been followed in the streets, and once they put up a bluffto get us where they could do us in. So we've come along to you. Wecan look after ourselves out of the office, you see, but what wewant is some one to help in case they try to rush us there."
"In brief, a fighting-editor," said Psmith. "At all costs we musthave privacy. No writer can prune and polish his sentences to hissatisfaction if he is compelled constantly to break off in order toeject boisterous hooligans. We therefore offer you the job ofsitting in the outer room and intercepting these bravoes beforethey can reach us. The salary we leave to you. There are doubloonsand to spare in the old oak chest. Take what you need and put therest--if any--back. How does the offer strike you, Comrade Brady?"
"We don't want to get you in under false pretences, Kid," saidBilly. "Of course, they may not come anywhere near the office. Butstill, if they did, there would be something doing. What do youfeel about it?"
"Gents," said the Kid, "it's this way."
He stepped into his coat, and resumed.
"Now that I've made good by getting the decision over Al., they'llbe giving me a chance of a big fight. Maybe with Jimmy Garvin.Well, if that happens, see what I mean? I'll have to be going awaysomewhere and getting into training. I shouldn't be able to comeand sit with you. But, if you gents feel like it, I'd be mightyglad to come in till I'm wanted to go into training-camp."
"Great," said Billy; "that would suit us all the way up. If you'ddo that, Kid, we'd be tickled to death."
"And touching salary--" put in Psmith.
"Shucks!" said the Kid with emphasis. "Nix on the salary thing. Iwouldn't take a dime. If it hadn't a-been for you gents, I'd havebeen waiting still for a chance of lining up in the championshipclass. That's good enough for me. Any old thing you gents want meto do, I'll do it. And glad, too."
"Comrade Brady," said Psmith warmly, "you are, if I may say so, thegoods. You are, beyond a doubt, supremely the stuff. We three,then, hand-in-hand, will face the foe; and if the foe has good,sound sense, he will keep right away. You appear to be ready. Shallwe meander forth?"
The building was empty and the lights were out when they emergedfrom the dressing-room. They had to grope their way in darkness. Itwas still raining when they reached the street, and the only signsof life were a moist policeman and the distant glare ofpublic-house lights down the road.
They turned off to the left, and, after walking some hundred yards,found themselves in a blind alley.
"Hullo!" said Billy. "Where have we come to?"
Psmith sighed.
"In my trusting way," he said, "I had imagined that either you orComrade Brady was in charge of this expedition and taking me by aknown route to the nearest Subway station. I did not think to ask.I placed myself, without hesitation, wholly in your hands."
"I thought the Kid knew the way," said Billy.
"I was just taggin' along with you gents," protested thelight-weight, "I thought you was taking me right. This is the firsttime I been up here."
"Next time we three go on a little jaunt anywhere," said Psmithresignedly, "it would be as well to take a map and a corps ofguides with us. Otherwise we shall start for Broadway and finishup at Minneapolis."
They emerged from the blind alley and stood in the dark street,looking doubtfully up and down it.
"Aha!" said Psmith suddenly, "I perceive a native. Several natives,in fact. Quite a little covey of them. We will put our case beforethem, concealing nothing, and rely on their advice to take us toour goal."
A little knot of men was approaching from the left. In the darknessit was impossible to say how many of them there were. Psmithstepped forward, the Kid at his side.
"Excuse me, sir," he said to the leader, "but if you can spare me amoment of your valuable time--"
There was a sudden shuffle of feet on the pavement, a quickmovement on the part of the Kid, a chunky sound as of wood strikingwood, and the man Psmith had been addressing fell to the ground ina heap.
As he fell, something dropped from his hand on to the pavement witha bump and a rattle. Stooping swiftly, the Kid picked it up, andhanded it to Psmith. His fingers closed upon it. It was a short,wicked-looking little bludgeon, the black-jack of the New Yorktough.
"Get busy," advised the Kid briefly.