A Hare in the Wilderness

by S E Turner

  'I was married to that man back there,' she began, her voice was a little over a whisper. 'It seems like a lifetime ago, and I have had to put it to the back of my mind. But the truth is, that monster is my husband and Ajeya's father.'

  'But there were a lot of men, Eujena. Which one are you talking about?'

  She looked at him bravely. She was trying so desperately hard to conceal her fear and the mere mention of his name made her want to vomit. 'The one on the grey mare. The one in the golden helmet and red cape. The one standing back and giving the orders.'

  'The Emperor?' His voice was incredulous.

  She nodded meekly.

  Hagen looked at her unable to conceal his shock. 'The Emperor is your husband?'

  'Estranged husband, but yes, he is.'

  'So, you are an Empress?' His tone was still one of bewilderment, but still he kept a tight rein and Coal plodded onwards.

  'Not any more, I am not. Most certainly not any more, and Ajeya must never know about this. Her past is in the past. It is forgotten and of no importance to anyone. I am only telling you because of our circumstances and what has just happened. But Ajeya is a clan girl now with the totem of a hare to protect her. She must never know, Hagen. Please give me your word.'

  'I give you my word. She will never know of this from me,' Hagen's voice was low and sincere.

  'Thank you,' the sound was breathless with emotion.

  'But I need to know what happened to you. Why were you on your own with a young child when you had such privilege, wealth, and safety in the city. You were an Empress, Eujena. What happened?' He wasn't entirely sure that he needed to know, or indeed wanted to know. Sometimes ignorance is the best policy. But he had opened this pot of worms and he couldn't stop it now.

  Eujena found her strong voice and began to tell her story. 'That man cast me out. When you found me, I had been wandering for months in the wilderness, trying to survive, trying to keep my child safe. I don't even know how long for. I honestly can't recall very much. The days and nights all roll into one. All I know is how alone and vulnerable I felt and many times I wished that I was dead.'

  His face saddened but still his inquisitive side searched for answers. 'But why did he cast you out?'

  She sighed heavily. 'He said that Ajeya wasn't his, that she had been born from a devil's seed, that no offspring of his would take on a form so hideous. He told me that no decent man would ever want her because of her disfigurement, and that she would discredit the dynasty. He accused me of sleeping with the devil and told me to take her and live in the caves or he would make us end our days in the dungeons.' Her throat was tight and she struggled to speak; she needed a few moments to find her composure.

  'But what made him wait until she was two years old? He must have loved her before then.' Eujena threw him an unsavoury look and bit her bottom lip as she breathed deeply. 'He never loved her. He told me to let her die when she was born. After two years, he said that he couldn't bear to look at her anymore. That she made him feel sick,' she dropped her gaze to the ground.

  Hagen found a rage burning inside of him and needed time to control his fury.

  'We had been travelling for months when you found me. You were my saviour then and still are. Hagen, please don't be angry with me and cast me aside now. I know I lied to you about my past, but I was scared. I thought you would abandon me, and I couldn't bear the thought of being out there on my own again. Please forgive me. Please, I beg you.'

  He stopped the cart. A strange silence descended. The predators were no longer hungry, their prey were no longer unsafe. The only sounds were those of the sleeping children still immersed in their own innocent dreams and a dragon moth fluttering by taking advantage of the cool night air.

  A chaos of emotion surged through his body at once: love and sadness, fury and fear. He relived the moment that he found her bloodied body, barely alive but still hanging on to something so strong. He felt the joy when Thorne gave them his blessings and allowed them to part as the family he had always yearned for. He could still taste her kiss from the evening of the Spring Festival when Ajeya had been given her totem and the energy that he had felt when they had danced until dawn. He longed for the warmth of her body as they slept together, and he knew that it was her skin that gave him comfort, not the bed or the covers that had been so lovingly made. He heard the screams of the clan he had just left behind, and he felt an anger so strong because the Emperor had tried to destroy the people he loved most in this kingdom. He wanted to cry out, but nothing came out. His voice was dry, but his tears flowed silently because the strongest emotion of them all was the love he had for this woman.

  He looked at her and managed to whisper. 'I love you, Eujena, and I love Ajeya as if she were my own. You make me laugh and you make me happy and I would do anything for you.' He kissed her hands. 'I am sad that you think I could be angry with you and cast you aside like a monster with no feelings. We are on this journey together, and we face everything together.' He took her face in the palm of his hands and kissed her passionately.

  She held on to him and whimpered. 'I love you, too, Hagen. I always will.'

  He held onto her tightly and let those words of love fill the air; then something entered his mind and he spoke out what he was thinking. 'Is there anything else you need to tell me?'

  She thought for a while and decided that she should have no secrets. She had to tell this gentle man everything. 'I have a son called Cornelius. He is three years older than Ajeya and is not disfigured. In fact he is a very handsome boy, so the Emperor acknowledges him as his own. But I worry for him, Hagen. He does not have a good father like you or any honourable father figure to look up to or aspire to. He is surrounded by hatred and greed and I fear for him.'

  Hagen didn't say anything. There were no words to say. This poor woman had suffered so much. He pulled her close to him and held her there. He kissed the top of her head and made her feel protected. 'You are safe now. I will look after you. To everyone we meet from now on, we are husband and wife. Ajeya is our daughter and Keao is our son. Keao will be told in the morning. Ajeya is too young to remember much, but she will grow up believing that Keao is her brother. We are a family now, looking for work.'

  Her sigh was long as she nodded with relief.

  'But in light of what you have just told me, do you think we should change your name, just in case he comes looking for you again and asks if anyone knows Eujena?'

  'You are right, Hagen. I hadn't thought about that. He didn't find me back there so he might continue his search,' her voice became anxious. 'I shall change my name to Jena. Perhaps we could tell Keao that I have decided it is a more appropriate clan name.'

  'That's a good idea.' he smiled.

  'What about Ajeya, should we change her name?'

  Hagen took in a deep breath through his nose and let it out slowly through pursed lips as he thought about it. 'I'm hoping it won't be necessary. It is you whom he wants to silence. Ajeya is a child and is no threat—she will have no memory of him. You, on the other hand...' He let Eujena work it out for herself.

  'You are right. Ajeya shall continue to be called by her name, and from now on, I shall be known as Jena.'

  He kissed her hand as if to seal the pact.

  A stirring came from the back of the cart and Keao popped his head up. 'Is everything all right, father?'

  'Everything is fine, Keao. I was just checking that we were on the right path and now I know we are.'

  'All right, just shout if you need me.' The boy snuggled down again and pulled the covers back over his head.

  Hagen nodded his approval and snapped the reins over Coal's back.

  It was almost dawn by the time they reached the next village. People were waking, shutters were opening, spilled voices still hushed from sleep. Further off came the creaking sound of the waterwheel and the droplets glistened under the rays of a rising sun. It was midsummer day and the woodsmoke hung lazily over squat flat roofs.

  'W
e shall try this clan,' Hagen's voice was more optimistic now, and Eujena's remorseful eyes were brighter.

  The village was surrounded by fields and a stream whispered beneath a wooden bridge. Beyond that were about a dozen houses stood proud around a common green and a beautiful oak tree festooned with different coloured ribbons dangling like rainbows from the gnarled and twisted branches. A dog started barking at the sound of the wagon, and a flock of geese started honking and hissing at the approaching horse. Hagen steered the party through the village, following the twisting lanes between the homes. People were emerging and setting about their work. One group of lads were armed with sickles and headed off for a day in the fields. Another group were off to the barns to see to the horses. Women with baskets of grain were feeding a gaggle of geese followed by young girls throwing seeds to a brood of hens. Gates were being opened, doors unlocked, and wagons and carts wheeled out ready to take their loads. A hive of activity spread out before them, and the sun blazed down as though the colour stolen by the night was returned in an even brighter hue. Most people tipped their heads at the young family making their way through the peppered bridle ways. It was a peaceful spot, still and tranquil and lovely to behold.

  Hagen jumped down from the cart. 'This is good land and good soil,' he said, picking up a handful of dirt and rubbing it between his fingers. 'Fertile and rich. This is an excellent settlement.'

  'I'm glad you think so,' came a booming voice.

  Hagen stood up and smacking his hands together, dusted himself down.

  A tall man stood before them with long white hair that reached his shoulders. His eyes were kind and his mouth arched into a gentle smile. His breeches were worn, and his white shirt crumpled, but a strong hand was held out as a sign of friendship. 'My name is Colom and I am the leader of the Hill Fort Tribe.'

  Hagen responded with a firm handshake. 'Good morning, Colom. I am very pleased to make your acquaintance. My name is Hagen, this is my wife Jena, my son Keao, and my daughter Ajeya is still sleeping in the back, I believe.'

  As Colom walked over to greet Jena, they couldn't help but notice he had a slight limp, whether it was one leg slightly shorter than the other, or a deformity, they couldn't tell, but as it didn't really seem to bother him, they decided that it shouldn't bother them either.

  'Have you come far?' asked Colom after shaking hands with Jena and Keao.

  'About a day’s ride,' said Hagen sincerely. 'But I am looking for work and I would require accommodation for all of us if you can spare it.'

  Colom turned around and looked over the settlement. He rubbed his chin between his thumb and fingers and grunted to himself. Hagen looked back at Jena and shrugged his shoulders. Jena began to look uneasy.

  'I'm a good worker,' he chipped in, hopeful that his aptitude would make a difference. He looked at the children in the back. 'My son Keao is fourteen years old and he can put his hand to anything, and we have a cart load of rabbit and grouse aboard. We would be happy to share it with everyone.' Fumbled words seemed to fall on deaf ears.

  Jena looked to the ground despondently. But then her eyes lifted to see a woman walking towards them. She was wiping her hands on a white apron that fell over a long woollen dress.

  'What's all this, Colom?'

  'It's a young family, Peira, they are asking for work and lodgings.'

  'Well, we can accommodate them can't we? I mean we have a lot of work at this time of the year, and we can always do with the help.'

  'Of course, we have work, my love. I was just thinking which lodge we could put them in.'

  'That one over there father. That one's empty.' A young boy appeared from behind his mother. Both his legs were in wooden splints and held in place with thick leather straps. They had been made by an expert craftsman and were designed to fit him perfectly. Apart from his legs, he was a sturdy lad, and with a mop of golden curly hair he looked like a little god sent from above. Jena was taken aback by his beautiful face.

  'You wouldn't think he was only six years old, would you? He's got a good head on those shoulders, always telling us how things should be done.' His mother laughed and hugged the boy affectionately.

  Colom took his hand. 'I believe you are right, young Dainn. Come, let us show our guests to their accommodation.'

  Chapter Twenty

  Colom whistled to a stable lad to take the horse and wagon. Hagen lifted the sleeping girl out of the back of the cart. Jena carried the blankets.

  'Where are your belongings?' Peira asked in a perturbed tone, looking for their bags.

  Jena looked to Hagen to answer.

  'We had to leave in a hurry. Some of the children were being unkind to Ajeya.'

  Jena rolled her eyes at him. Hagen shrugged his shoulders in response.

  The look didn't go unnoticed by Peira. 'Why were the children being unkind to her?' Hagen showed Peira the child's face. She threw her hands to her mouth and gasped. 'The poor lamb! Children can be so cruel. My own boy has suffered taunting from an early age, what with his legs and walking, but I soon put a stop to it, with the help of his father, of course. He cannot abide it either and suffered extreme mockery himself. But it must have been so hard for you.'

  Jena bit her bottom lip and shook her head discreetly. But what was the alternative? Tell them the truth, that they fled the Clan of the Mountain Lion when it was being attacked by the Emperor and his army! No, Hagen had probably come up with the best and only explanation.

  'Your boy walks well though,' noticed Jena.

  'He does now,' replied Peira. 'But it wasn't always like that.' The mother looked at him lovingly, reminiscing and remembering a more difficult time. 'The splints will be coming off soon, he only has them on for a couple of hours a day now.' She nodded. 'He doesn't really need them. It's his father. He just wants to make sure.'

  'Really, that is good news,' enthused Jena.

  'And then he will be able to play with Ajeya.'

  The two women smiled at each other and watched as Coal was led off to a stable and the wagon was stabilised under a lean-to.

  'Your horse will be well looked after,' said Dainn. 'I go to the stables every day to help. Maybe Ajeya would like to come with me one day.'

  'She would like that very much, Dainn, thank you.'

  They followed their hosts to a comfortable sized building that had a long veranda at the front and a wide porch leading into a spacious family room. The veranda had a seating area and a wood pit. Various kitchen utensils were stacked in a bowl on a small wooden table. Inside the family room there were curtains up and rugs on the floor and a huge wooden table ran along one side with two long benches underneath. Cupboards, drawers and shelves were scattered opposite. There were three doors leading off into the bedrooms. Each subsequent room had wooden beds strung with timber slats. Goose down mattresses lay on top of the slats and pillows full of eider feathers were at the head. A neat pile of blankets and finely woven sheets were stacked at the other end.

  'This is perfect,' trilled Jena.

  'We get our own rooms, at last,' hailed Keao.

  Hagen laughed and put an arm round the lad's shoulder.

  'I am glad you like it.' Peira was pleased.

  Jena quickly made up a bed and laid Ajeya down. Peira helped her cover the child with blankets and as she did so, the amber necklace was exposed and glinted in the sun.

  Peira gasped in astonishment. 'Where did you get that?'

  'She was given it, Peira. It was a gift. It's beautiful, isn't it.'

  'It certainly is, but who gave it to you?'

  'By a great man called Thorne, leader of the Giant's Claw.' Jena's voice was full of pride.

  'But she is disfigured. Why would Thorne do that?'

  Suddenly Jena became concerned. This was more than admiration of a trinket. Peira knew something. She knew Thorne.

  'I think it's time we went,' said Colom to Hagen and Keao, peeping round the corner. 'I can show you where you will be working. And you, young Dainn, you come along t
oo.'

  'Can't I stay here? Mother is upset.'

  'No, you can't stay. You come with us. I need you to help me. Mother is fine, she just needs to talk to Jena.'

  'But...'

  'No buts—come along!'

  The men left. The women looked at each other.

  'Come and sit down, you look shocked.' Jena led Peira to the long table and sat down next to her on the bench.

  'I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have alarmed you,' croaked the older mother... 'But the necklace brought back memories.'

  Jena was still in the dark about the meaning. 'Thorne gave it to Ajeya. It was a gift.'

  Peira started to weep.

  'What's the matter, please, I don't understand?'

  Peira composed herself and lifted her head high. 'Thorne was my husband. I was married to him.' She sniffed back the tears. 'For years I tried to have a baby and each one I lost. It was either still born, or I lost it in a pool of blood. There were so many that I lost.' Her voice trailed off.

  Jena put her hand on the woman's knee.

  'When I gave birth to Dainn, he was born with twisted legs and I was told I would have to surrender him to the weeping caves.' She started to cry and then composed herself again. 'I'm sorry.'

  'Please don't be,' said a compassionate Jena.

  'I was a much older mother, Jena. It would have been my last chance to have a baby. I know that. Everyone knew that. So, before they could take my baby from me, I ran away.'

  Jena held her hands up to her mouth. 'You poor woman.'

  'I remember being weaker than I realised, and certainly older than I gave myself credit for. A much younger version of myself would have moved much faster and been far more nimble in any type of terrain, but creaking bones and stiff muscles added to the trauma of just giving birth, and it made the journey nearly impossible. The wet weather added to my burden further, creating mud pools where I trod, and the winds tried hard to beat me back.'