Do What I Want: A High School Bully Romance (Dirty Little Secret Book 2)

by Kai Juniper

  Chapter Two

  Briggs

  Ella pushes me away. "I can't believe I fell for another one of your lies!"

  "What lies? What are you talking about?"

  She puts her hands on her hips. “You saying you see me differently now? Pretending you're attracted to me? It’s all lies, and I fell for it!" She throws her hands up. "What is wrong with me?"

  I grab her arms and hold them at her sides, looking in her eyes. "I wasn't lying. Why are you acting like this? How'd we go from kissing, to you yelling at me?"

  "That's another thing," she says, trying to yank away from me. "You have a girlfriend. You shouldn't be kissing me when you're with someone else."

  I let her go and take a step back. "You're right. I'm still with Aubrey, but it's not because I want to be."

  "Then what's the reason?" Ella asks, folding her arms over her chest. "Why are you still with her?"

  "Because she was getting suspicious. So was Scarlett. They've both been asking why I haven't been harassing you, and when I told them I didn't want to waste my time on you, they didn't believe me."

  "And that's enough of a reason to stay with someone you don't want to be with?"

  "If it means protecting us, then yes."

  "Aubrey has no idea what's going on with us, and she'd never figure it out. Breaking up with her is not putting us at risk."

  "Not right now, but it could be a problem later on. If the cops ever suspected we were involved, they'd start asking our friends about us, asking where we were that night and if they noticed any changes in us after that night."

  "That wouldn’t matter. It doesn't prove anything."

  "No, but it'll make the cops look into it more, and the more they look into it, the more we're at risk of being caught."

  Ella glares at me. "Just admit it. All that stuff you said just now was your attempt to make me finish what we started in your room that day. You're trying to use me like you've used half the girls at school."

  "That's not what I was doing. And I haven't been with half the girls at school. I'm not Finn. I'm more selective than that." I lean down to her face. "I said all that because I meant it. And I didn't want to say it. I only did because you asked, and because I thought maybe..." I shake my head, deciding not to say it.

  "What? Finish what you were saying."

  "Let's get out of here." I turn to leave.

  "Wait!" She races up to me, grabbing hold of my arm. "What were you going to say?"

  "Forget it. I already know the answer. I don't need to ask."

  "Ask what?" Her expression softens and she looks regretful. "I'm sorry, okay? I shouldn't have accused you like that. I should've let you explain. Now will you please just tell me what you were going to say?"

  I hate it when she does this, when she shows that side of herself that's kind and forgiving and caring. I'd rather have angry Ella, yelling at me for shit, than the kind, sweet Ella that confuses me and makes me feel guilty for being an ass to her all these years.

  "We need to go," I say. "They'll be here any minute."

  "They can wait. Briggs, tell me what you were going to say."

  I face her, wanting the answer but not wanting to ask.

  Fuck it. If she laughs at me, who the fuck cares? Even if she does, I know she's lying. The way she kissed me just now? There's no way she doesn't feel something for me.

  "I was going to ask you the same question you asked me," I say.

  "What question?"

  "If your feelings about me had changed, or if you still think I'm an ass after getting to know me."

  She pauses to think, chewing on her lower lip, drawing attention to it and making me want to kiss her again. I really like kissing her. I don't usually like kissing. In fact, I usually try to avoid it and skip to the other stuff, but with Ella I don't want to stop. I love the feel of her lips and the way she grabs hold of me when I slip my tongue in her mouth. I want to do so much more to her, and I would if I wasn't still chained to Aubrey. I want to break up with her, but I don't trust that bitch. If the cops questioned her after I broke up with her, she'd tell them whatever story would land me in jail. She'd lie to get revenge. She doesn't care about me, and never did.

  "Yes," Ella finally says.

  "Yes, what?"

  She stands up straighter. "Yes, I still think you're an ass."

  "Why? Do you have a reason?"

  "I have many, but for one, you treated me like shit at school today, as if nothing had changed between us."

  "It was an act. I didn't want Aubrey getting suspicious."

  "You could've just walked away. You didn't have to treat me the way you did. And I still don't believe Aubrey is a threat."

  "She could be, if the cops ever question her."

  "I doubt that they would, but even if they did, what's she going to say? That you were out getting pot that night? My dad would tell the cops the same thing. One way or another the cops will find out we were all on the road that night so the only new information Aubrey can give the cops is that you stopped seeing her as much after that weekend, but that doesn't prove anything. You could just tell the cops you were trying to end things with her, in which case staying with her is actually the riskier choice. Your story will only make sense if you actually break up with her, and soon."

  I hadn't thought about that, but Ella's right. All Aubrey could really say is that I was a shitty boyfriend after that weekend. The cops won't care about that. They'll just assume she and I weren't getting along, a story that would be even more believable if I broke up with her.

  "You can do what you want," Ella says with a shrug. "I don't really care. I'm just saying that it's not helping our situation to stay with her, and it might even end up hurting us."

  "I agree," I say, walking up to her.

  "You do?" she asks, sounding confused.

  I wrap my arms around her waist. "Thanks for clearing that up. You just saved me from several more weeks of hell with that bitch."

  "Wait—what?" Ella rears back, but I keep her in my arms.

  "I don't want Aubrey. I thought I made that clear with that kiss just now, but since you didn't pick up on it, I'll just have to do it again." I lean down and kiss her. She tenses up at first, but then I feel her relax, her body melting into my arms.

  She slowly pulls away, her eyes searching my face. "What's going on here?"

  "I think it's pretty obvious."

  "That you're trying to trick me again? Act like you like me and then tomorrow at school you're back to bullying me and dating Aubrey?"

  "I'm done with Aubrey. She annoys the shit out of me and spends way too fucking long staring at herself in the mirror."

  "How do I know you're not just saying that?" Ella asks, looking at me with suspicion.

  "You don't. You just have to trust that I'm telling the truth."

  "And why would I do that?"

  "Because it means we get to keep doing this." I kiss her, thinking she'll push me away, but instead she grabs hold of my shirt, which seems to be her thing. She grabs my shirt whenever we kiss, which I'm taking to mean she doesn't want me to stop.

  I back her against the wall and instantly think of all the times I've had her backed up like this at school, at her locker, by the bleachers. All those times I was doing it to intimidate her, to show her who's boss, but a part of me also wanted to do what I'm doing right now. To kiss her, and touch her, and have her respond with that soft, sexy moan.

  "Briggs.” She tips her head back against the wall, her chest rising and falling as she catches her breath. "Why are you doing this?"

  "Because I want to." I kiss her neck and skim my hand over her breast just to see how she'll react. She does this little shiver that makes me smile. I love how everything seems so new to her. How even the slightest touch makes her react. Other girls barely respond when we're doing shit. Aubrey acts bored. Once she even looked at her phone. It got to the point where I didn't even like having sex with her.

  Ella pushes me back.
"I mean, why are you doing this when you know it's all an act?"

  "It's not an act. I want to keep doing this. I thought you did too."

  "I do. I just—I don't trust you. I thought we were becoming friends last week and then you turned on me."

  "I didn't turn on you. I was trying to protect you, to protect all of us. But you're right. Breaking up with Aubrey would explain why I've been avoiding her the past couple weeks. The cops wouldn't think it had anything to do with what happened that night."

  "So you're really breaking up with her?"

  "Yes. Why do you keep asking me that?"

  "Because I don't believe you."

  I bring her in my arms. "Or maybe you want to make sure I'm done with Aubrey so you can have me for yourself."

  Ella rolls her eyes. "Yeah, because every girl wants you."

  "They do, actually. But there's one I'm still not sure about." I lean down to her ear. "From the sounds she makes when I kiss her, I think she likes me, but she won't admit it."

  "I don't make sounds," she insists.

  "You do," I whisper over her mouth. "And it turns me on." I kiss her, but keep it short, wanting to see if she'll kiss me back or push me away. I can tell she's struggling with what to do. There's a part of her that wants me, and a part of her that's telling her to stay away.

  She's breathing heavy and looking at me like she still doesn't trust me. I don't blame her. I wouldn't trust me either, but I'm not lying to her. I am going to break up with Aubrey. And the thing I told Ella about wanting to keep doing this? Kissing her, and maybe doing more? That's definitely not a lie.

  "Do you still hate me, Ella?" I ask, slipping a piece of her hair behind her ear.

  "No," she says with a sigh. "But I should. And I did, before I got to know you."

  "Are you saying you're starting to like me?"

  "Maybe. I don't want to, but it's happening anyway," she says, sounding annoyed with herself.

  "And that's a problem?"

  "Yes, because I'm not supposed to like you. And you're not supposed to like me."

  "And yet here we are, kissing in my bathroom."

  She smiles. "Yeah, I'm not sure how that happened. I just came in here to fix your face." She reaches up and gently touches it. "The bleeding stopped."

  "It'll be fine. I'll just have to stop shaving until it heals."

  "It could still get infected. You should put something on it."

  "Stop worrying about me," I tell her, because it really does bother me when she does that. I'm not used to people worrying about me so it feels strange when Ella does. It's not a bad feeling, but one that makes me uncomfortable, and like I'm not in control. I don't like that feeling.

  "Why do you get mad when I try to help you?"

  "Because I don't need help." I take her hand from my face. "It was just a cut. It'll heal."

  My phone dings. I take it from the counter and see a text from Parker. We're here. You up in your room fucking Ella again?

  Parker thinks Ella and I had sex that day he caught us in my room. I keep telling him we didn't, but he won't give it up and it's pissing me off.

  "Is that Aubrey?" Ella asks.

  "No. Parker. He's downstairs."

  "Does he know about us? Because he acted like he did when he saw me in your room."

  "He thinks there's something going on between us, but I told him he was full of shit."

  "Are we going to tell him?"

  "Tell him what?"

  "Yeah, I guess you're right." She walks past me to the door, seeming hurt.

  "Hey!" I catch her before she leaves, spinning her around to face me. "What did I say?"

  "Nothing. Let's go."

  "No. What did I say? Why are you upset?"

  "I'm not. Hurry up. They're waiting for us."

  "I don't give a shit. Tell me what I said. Are you mad because I didn't tell Parker about us?"

  "No. I mean, it's not like I wanted you to tell him. It's just the way you said it, it's like you—I don't know how to explain it. Just forget it."

  I lean down to her. "I didn't mean there's nothing going on between us. There's definitely something happening here, but I don't want Parker and Finn to know. I don't think it'd be a good idea to tell them. That's all I meant."

  "Oh." She looks embarrassed, which I find adorable. "Okay, well, we should go."

  "We should, but not before I do this." I hold her face in my hands and kiss her, wishing I could keep kissing her but knowing Parker will be banging on my door if we don't get downstairs. I let her go. "Think you can pretend to hate me?"

  "Absolutely." She smiles. "I've been doing it for years."

  We walk through my room to the door. "You've been pretending?" I ask, holding the door open for her.

  "No. I really did hate you." She walks off.

  I watch her go, not at all offended that she hated me. I assumed she did, but I kind of thought she'd tell me she was only pretending to avoid hurting my feelings. But instead she went with pure honesty, which I admire. I wish I could be that honest. I was raised to lie about pretty much everything. It's all I know. So then why do I keep spilling my guts to Ella? Why do I keep telling her all this personal shit? And why did I just admit to her that I like her? And that I want her more than Aubrey?

  I don't like what Ella's doing to me, making me feel shit I shouldn't be feeling, and say shit I shouldn't be saying, and yet it keeps happening. When we're alone together, something changes in me. I become someone else, someone I don't even recognize.

  How is she doing this, and how do I make it stop?

  Chapter Three

  Briggs

  When we get downstairs, Parker's on the couch staring at his phone and Finn's beside him, looking like he's passed out.

  "What's with him?" I ask Parker, pointing at Finn.

  "He's wasted."

  "Finn!" I yell, loud enough that it makes Ella jump.

  "What?" Finn groans, falling sideways on the couch.

  "Sit your ass up. I need you to pay attention."

  "It's not gonna happen," Parker says, putting his phone down. "He had half a bottle of vodka."

  "What the fuck?" I sit down on the leather chair next to the one Ella's in. "Why'd you let him get wasted?"

  "He was like that when I got there."

  "Then why the hell did you bring him?"

  "Because you told me to!" Parker says, raising his voice. "Why the fuck are you yelling at me? You said to go get him so I got him."

  I blow out a breath, trying to remain calm. "Let me see your phone. I want to see the text."

  Parker pulls the text up and shows me his phone. "I already told you what it said."

  "It's the same as mine," I say, comparing it to the one on my phone. "Word for word. And Finn got the same one?"

  "Yeah. He sent it to me." Parker swipes through his messages and shows me the screen grab Finn took of the text.

  "You two need to stop texting about this shit. And you need to delete that text. All of us do."

  "Are you sure that's a good idea?" Ella asks. "What if we need it to show the police?"

  "Why would we show the police?" Parker says, sounding annoyed. Ever since he caught me with Ella, he's been even more of an ass to her than usual.

  “That text is a threat," Ella says. "If he keeps sending us threats, it could be serious enough that we'd need to report him. We wouldn't tell the cops about the accident. We'd just say some psycho guy is sending us threatening texts."

  "And by 'us', you mean everyone but you." Parker looks at me. "Don't you think it's strange that the three of us got the text, but not Ella?"

  "Don't be starting that shit," I tell him. "She didn't do it."

  "Says the guy who's fucking her." Parker rolls his eyes.

  "What?" Ella shoots me a dirty look. "Did you tell him we're—"

  "No. He's just being an ass."

  "And you're doing shit with Ella and lying about it," Parker says.

  "You really think I'd do
something with HIM?" Ella points to me, looking disgusted. "I hate Briggs."

  "You spend a lot of time with someone you hate," Parker says.

  "Only because I have to for class."

  "Parker, let it go," I say. "We don't have time for this shit. We need to figure out who sent this text."

  "SHE did." Parker points to Ella. "It's so fucking obvious. We know she hates us. She just admitted it. And what better way to get back at us than to send us to jail and ruin our lives?"

  "For the last time," I say, "Ella did not do this."

  "And how do you know?" Parker folds his arms over his chest. "Do you have proof that she didn't?"

  "No, but I will when I find out who did it."

  "And how are you going to do that?"

  "Ella's going to ask one of the tech nerds at school to track down whoever sent it."

  Parker throws his hands up. "Are you kidding me? And you think she's going to come back to us with the truth? She's not going to talk to the tech nerds. She's going to make up some fucking story to cover up the truth, which is that she's the one who sent it."

  "I didn't send it!" Ella says, getting angry.

  "Then who did?" Parker challenges.

  "That's what I'm trying to find out," she says. "And since the rest of you bullied the tech nerds so bad they're scared to death to be around you, I'm the only one who can ask them for help."

  Parker stands up. "This is bullshit. I'm leaving." He kicks Finn's leg. "Get up. We're going."

  I stand up. "You have a better plan, let's hear it."

  Parker storms up to me. "Here's a plan. How about you stop sleeping with the fucking enemy? And if you don't, maybe I'll tell Aubrey."

  "Go ahead. She'd never believe you. And I'm breaking up with her so it doesn't matter."

  He huffs. "You're breaking up with Aubrey? For HER?" He points to Ella.

  She jumps up from her chair. "Stop saying I'm with Briggs! I'm going to throw up just thinking about it."