Love's Suicide

by Jennifer Foor

  B started laughing from across the table. I turned to see the culprit and noticed Brooks showing her his mouth full of food. I hit him with my elbow. He crunched his body up and started coughing and laughing at the same time. B laughed more.

  “I can see that some things haven’t changed.” Danica laughed too.

  I took a deep breath and look around the table. “How about we start over?”

  “Katy, you’re home. As much as I would have loved to be a part of your life for the past two and half years, I understand why you felt like you had to leave. I’m not going to lie. That morning you left was a day I don’t like thinking about, but aside from sending everyone home with their gifts, it wasn’t so bad. Walt and I were worried what would happen when you finally saw Brooks again. My mother used to tell me that absence makes the heart grow fonder. You two grew up in the same house. It wasn’t hard to believe at all.”

  “I didn’t want to hurt anyone. I left because I couldn’t bear to see your faces. I thought you’d hate me.”

  “We were angry that we let it go as far as it did. Branch hasn’t always been forthcoming, but he made it a point to shove everything about the two of you in his brother’s face. We accept blame for allowing it to happen. The fact that you two found each other again, just proves that it’s right.”

  Brooks grabbed my leg and squeezed it. I looked at him and saw him winking. “She thinks you were going to make her sleep in the tree house.”

  “We might make you sleep there, but not Katy, and certainly not little Brooklyn, who’s obviously named after her father.” I could see the love in Danica’s eyes and knew that she’d forgiven me. For the time being, I felt happy.

  Sure, I wanted to kick the crap out of Branch and his faulty balls, but I had an idea that Brooks was going to handle that for me.

  I looked over at my beautiful little girl and finally felt like she’d have the family that I always wanted for her. I could see her coming to visit and celebrating the holidays being spoiled like crazy.

  Just knowing that made me feel blessed. I had Brooks to thank for it all. We may have been running from our problems at home, but I’d never felt safer than how I felt at that very moment.

  Chapter 43

  We spent the entire afternoon catching up. Danica wouldn’t let B get two feet from her. She changed, fed and played with her. Walt took a dozen pictures, making sure to get some of the three of us. I knew they’d be our first family photos together, deeming them priceless.

  They wanted to know all about my time away, in which Brooks filled in the blanks with his cleaned up version, that didn’t include my marriage or the fact that I’d kept him from knowing he had a child. By dinner time, they were done with the questions and only wanted to know when they could come visit. The good thing was that I owned my house. I’d had it built from part of my inheritance money. Once I got my legal issues settled, they could come and visit and have plenty of room.

  When it got late, after dinner, Brooks and Walt went up into the attic to get the rails for the bed. Walt said that he knew for sure they still had some around.

  Danica and I took B up and gave her a bath. It was cool, seeing her in the same tub that I’d gotten my baths in. I belonged there, with this family, even without Brooks in my life. He’d brought me home and I felt complete for the first time since I’d lost my parents. I’d finally found my purpose. Seeing Danica, loving on B, as if she’d known her forever and loved her the same made everything make sense.

  “She’s so beautiful, Katy.”

  I crossed my arms and stood in the doorway watching her washing her granddaughter. “She looks like her daddy. Of course she’s beautiful.”

  “I’ll have to get out the baby pictures, so you can show her. It’s uncanny, really. When I saw her I knew she was his.” I couldn’t remember seeing her so happy. My little miracle had that kind of effect on people.

  “I just wish Brooks could have been home when she was born. He’s missed so much being away.”

  Danica sat back on the tile floor. “Don’t let that get to you. I think you both needed the time apart. I don’t mean that like you’re assuming. What I mean is that you needed the time to figure out your feelings. Between the two of us, I think you probably always knew. You’ve favored Brooks since the three of you were babies.”

  I laughed. “I never really thought about it. When we were kids we all three loved each other. It was so innocent back then.”

  “Honey, we all grow up. We make mistakes and we learn from them. I wish that you all didn’t have to hurt each other so much, but everyone’s happy now. Even Branch seems content with his life.”

  “He won’t be happy to know I’m here. I’m sure I’m the last person he and Melissa ever want to see again.” Not that I wanted to see him. I was going to shove my foot as far up his ass as it would go, if I ever did.

  “Katy, it’s none of my business, but maybe it would do you all some good to work things out.”

  I shrugged, not feeling like talking about seeing Branch, at all. “I don’t know. I can’t make a decision like that without Brooks.”

  I knew she was disappointed, wanting her whole family together again, especially since knowing about B.

  She removed B from the tub and wrapped her in a towel. The guys were in the bedroom, putting up the rails that had been covered in plastic. We pulled it off, while Danica helped her get pajamas on. I reached in her bag and got out her favorite book. “B, do you want Mama or Daddy to read it?”

  “Daddy and Mama.”

  We looked at each other and laughed. More than her asking us both to do it together, she’d once again called Brooks “Daddy”, which I knew melted his heart.

  Danica and Walt both gave her kisses before leaving us to be alone. I turned all of my attention to my two B’s, watching them interacting together and loving every minute of it. Even after she’d fallen sleep, we lay there, all three of us together, in the quiet room, until Brooks sat up and reached for me to join him.

  We found his parents downstairs in the family room, drinking wine. They had two glasses for us, and I was too embarrassed to tell them that I really didn’t drink. Brooks sat down with his arm around my back. I knew, as long as we were together, we could get through anything.

  “We’ve been talking while you were putting B down. Listen, I know you’ll both have a hard time with it, but we want to have your brother and Melissa over before you leave. We’re a family, all of us. So much time has passed and we never know when something could happen.” Danica’s words cut like a knife through me. I knew we had to face Branch and even Melissa. We didn’t have to be best friends, but at least be cordial so that Danica and Walt could finally feel like they had their family back. Throughout the day I’d seen how much they missed us. With Branch and Melissa still living at least an hour away, they were lonely. Now, with a new granddaughter, they wanted a fresh start.

  “Okay.”

  Brooks turned and looked at me like he was in disbelief. “Wait, did you just say okay?”

  “Yeah. We can handle Branch and even my ex best-friend Melissa. Some more of this wine might be necessary though.”

  Everyone laughed.

  We talked more about where we were living and if they could come and visit. I wasn’t sure if things would calm down by Christmas, so Brooks and I promised to visit for the holidays. His schedule, being that he was injured was questionable. Based on the fact that my house was paid for, and Brooks made good money, I wouldn’t need to work. Any reason to stay home with B was a good one for me.

  While sitting with his parents we were planning our future without them knowing that we hadn’t done it already. Brooks never stopped touching me. No matter what he was doing or how he was sitting, his hand was always somewhere on me. I took comfort in knowing that if I fell he’d always catch me. I didn’t know how, but I was falling more in love in with the man by the minute.

  When it got late, we said our goodnights and headed up to go to slee
p. Brooks checked on B before meeting me in his bedroom across the hall. After a little too many glasses of wine, I was feeling like I could conquer the world, and an erotic dance.

  I don’t even know why he’d packed them, but his fatigues were packed snugly in his bag. I pulled out the jacket and grabbed the boots, before hiding in his closet to undress.

  Brooks came into the room looking around for me. He must have thought I was in the bathroom, because once he was down to his underwear, he started climbing into bed, as if he knew something was about to happen.

  I pushed open the double closet doors, wearing only his camo jacket and his extra-large boots. The jacket, which was left hanging open, was giant on me, but from the look on his face, he could have cared less. I trotted my way toward the bed, assuming that my strut was sexy. Brooks put his hands behind his head and had a huge smile on his face. About four feet from the bed, I tripped over my own feet and went face first into the mattress.

  My knee was skinned and I was completely embarrassed, yet too drunk to care. I sat there, with my breast hanging out, laughing hysterically.

  Brooks slid off the bed, silently making fun of me, while he checked my knee. “Are you alright?”

  “I feel like an idiot. This was supposed to be sexy.”

  He touched his jacket and looked at the rest of my body that was supposed to be hidden. “Trust me, Kat, you’re extremely sexy. Maybe next time you can go without the boots.” He pulled them off of me one at a time and helped me back up. I felt his hands reaching in and tugging off the jacket. When it fell onto the floor, I was standing there, completely naked in his arms.

  “You really think I’m sexy?”

  He kissed me slowly, taking his time to answer. “I can’t wait to get you in the pool tomorrow.”

  I thought about the pool and it being dark outside. Mix that with half a bottle of wine and a very lightweight drinker, and my idea was probably outrageous. “How about we go swimming right now?”

  He bit down on his lip and smiled. “Don’t tempt me with your nakedness, woman. I’m weak when it comes to you.”

  “You make me happy.” The room was starting to spin and I was giggling even when things weren’t funny.

  He grabbed my hand and pulled me onto the bed. “We can swim tomorrow.”

  I sat back up. “Can we make love now?”

  He laughed more and I felt like he was making fun of me. He touched my thigh and ran his hand up between my legs. “You want to make love with my parents downstairs and our daughter across the hall?”

  “Is this a trick question?”

  Brooks walked his fingers from my belly button to one of my breast. He flicked the tip, causing me to jump. “Can you be quiet?”

  I snickered. “Probably not.”

  He was laughing too, but only had to cover my loud mouth so I didn’t wake up B. With his face against my ear he whispered, “If you can be really quiet, I’ll make love with you. Can you be quiet, beautiful?”

  I nodded.

  Brooks placed kisses on my skin as he slid down between my legs. I hadn’t expected it, but there he was playing with my sex and peering right at me. “Close your eyes.”

  I let my head fall to the pillow and felt his warm tongue penetrating me. Every one of my senses came alive as I pictured in my head what his tongue was doing to me. Each stroke of his slippery muscle sent chills from my toes to my nipples. When fingers came into play, I lost control.

  It felt too good.

  I couldn’t take it.

  I screamed out loudly, filling the whole house with my tremendous orgasm.

  When I realized what I’d done, I shot up in the bed and looked right at Brooks. My hand covered my mouth as he shook his head and wiped off his face. “You suck at keeping quiet.”

  “I couldn’t help it,” I whispered, knowing his parents had heard us. I pulled the covers over my head. “I’m never going downstairs.”

  He rubbed me between my legs. “You’re going to have to put a sock in your mouth, because I’m not even half way finished.”

  I kicked the covers off my feet and looked right at him as he climbed on top of me. If this was my last moments without being able to look them in the eyes, at least we could make it worth it. “I’ll be quiet this time.”

  He kissed my lips and the scent of me lingered on them. “I don’t care how loud you get. Do you have any idea how long I’ve wanted to do this is my bedroom with you?”

  I slapped his back. “You’re funny.”

  “You’re mine, Kat. You’re finally all mine.”

  And I was, utterly and completely his. My mind, body and soul belonged to this man.

  Chapter 44

  Though it was a bit embarrassing, I managed to go downstairs for breakfast the next morning when they called up the stairs that it was ready. It was also a must when we found that B was already out of bed and had been changed from her pajamas that were folded on top of her pillow. Brooks walked around in his underwear, as if he still lived there, while I rummaged through my old dresser drawers to find a real pair of pajama pants.

  He didn’t have to force me to put on one of his army shirts. I got a kick out of wearing them around, knowing that they were his. Brooks put on a pair of shorts before walking downstairs, pulling me behind him.

  Two adults were at the table smiling when we walked into the room. B saw us, but she was too busy shoveling food into her mouth to say anything. We both headed for the coffee pot and I watched as Brooks poured me a cup and made them both the same. Cream and one sugar was the perfect blend. He handed me mine and winked. “Just how you like it.”

  I took a sip before walking over to the table and sitting down.

  “Did you two sleep well?”

  Brooks sat his cup down and started filling his plate with food that had been set out on the table. He didn’t look up at either of them when he replied. “Go ahead and ask the burning question. I’m sure you all heard Kat. Apparently we need to watch giving her wine, because she takes all of her clothes off and hides in my closet.”

  They started to laugh.

  “Oh, it gets better. She put on my boots and jacket and thought that she was going to be sexy. After two steps she fell down face first. After that, we slept pretty good, right Kat?”

  Even though he’d told them about my embarrassing attempt at being sexy, it had eluded them from thinking that what they heard was us having sex. They weren’t stupid and obviously we were plenty old enough, but I still didn’t want them thinking that we’d disrespect them, even if that’s sort of what we did, or what I did.

  I smiled and covered my face with my coffee. “I’m okay, if anyone is concerned.”

  After that they seemed to not even care about the loud moaning coming from Brooks’ room. Instead, they wanted to let us know that they’d already gone ahead and contacted Branch.

  “So I sent Branch and email this morning asking them to come to dinner Friday night. I’m waiting to hear back, but they both get off early during the week, since they live on the other side of the bridge, but work over here. The traffic gets so bad on the weekends that sometimes they get stuck in it for hours. I let them know that there is plenty of room for them to stay the night and go home on Saturday.” Walt seemed excited, as did Danica, me not so much.

  Brooks, who was busy sticking his tongue through a hole in a pancake to make B laugh, didn’t even act like he heard his father talking. He was too amused with teaching our child everything she shouldn’t do at the table.

  “Brooks Michael, don’t teach her that!” I had to laugh when Danica brought out the middle name, like we were kids and he was in for it.

  “I’ve decided that since I’m a parent now I can make my own rules. If B wants to play with her food she can, as long as she still eats it.”

  I rolled my eyes and started making my plate.

  “So, we were talking last night, and Mom and I want to know if the two of you have any plans yet? Are you going to finally get married?�
��

  They thought we were already living together, and I guess at this point we sort of were. We’d been together every night since I’d left Bobby and I planned on him moving in with me when we got back, as long as the protective order was issued and I could feel safe taking B there. The last thing I wanted was Brooks walking around with military issued weapons. That didn’t sit well with having a toddler running around.

  “We’re not in a hurry to do it.” Brooks began. “I mean, I’ve been gone a long time. We’ve just found each other again. We’re happy the way things are, and when the time is right, I suppose we’ll get that piece of paper. For now I’ve got everything I want already.”

  The Valentines weren’t old fashioned, but they knew me. They knew I’d always wanted a big wedding.

  Thankfully they never mentioned it.

  After breakfast, Danica and Walt asked us if they could take B to meet a couple of their friends. I was nervous about her going somewhere, since we didn’t live near a big city, but knew they’d take care of her.

  As soon as they left, Brooks had ideas to occupy ourselves. “Get your suit on and meet me out back.”

  “It’s ten in the morning. You want to go swimming now?”

  “We’re home alone and there’s a pool outside. If you don’t feel like changing then take off your clothes and come as you are. The choice is yours.”

  I flashed him a dirty look. “We have neighbors.”

  “Actually, my beautiful lady, there’s nobody living in your old house. Dad told me last night. Since the pool is on that side, you’re out of excuses.” He pulled me close, removing the distance between us. While his lips teased mine, he reached his hand down the front of my pants and started rubbing me between my legs. Immediately, I closed my eyes, becoming a victim to my own self need.

  From the way he was taunting me with his perfect lips, I didn’t want to move from that exact spot. I lifted my arm and ran my fingers through his hair. He closed his eyes and I pulled him into another kiss. When I backed away, he opened them once again, with a motive that was apparent in his gaze. I bit down on my lip and started tugging us back against the wall. Once my body came to a halt, I started ripping down his shorts. Brooks said nothing when I dropped to my knees and freed his erection. He leaned against the wall as I began pleasing him, right in the middle of the kitchen. I looked up, seeing him trying to watch me, but failing when he couldn’t keep his eyes open.