Unbreak the Woodsman

by M. S. Parker

  But I wasn’t about to call things quits, either.

  To be honest, the very idea filled me with an emotion I didn’t want to think about.

  So, don’t, I told myself.

  Breanna, queen of denial…that was me.

  14

  Breanna

  I stretched lazily, enjoying the languid moment while Ryder lay next to me.

  I flushed as I caught him looking at me, but I didn’t try to cover myself.

  What would be the point? We’d just spent the past thirty minutes wrapped around each other, one of us under the other, touching, licking, learning.

  My heart was still racing from the climax, although it had slowed considerably, and I was on the verge of getting out of bed and making my way to the bathroom when my belly grumbled.

  Ryder looked amused. “Gave you a workout, did I?”

  “A bit.” I sat up and looked around, taking in the scattered clothes that formed a trail from the door to just shy of the bed. Really, if one were to be honest, I’d say we’d both given the other a workout. It had started downstairs at the front door where Ryder had greeted me with a full, lavish kiss before pushing me back up against the door and grinding himself against me.

  By the time we’d made it up to the room, my hands had been shaking.

  He did that to me, all too easily.

  “I’ve got food if you’re hungry,” he offered.

  He traced a finger down my arm, and I gave him a quick smile. “I wouldn’t mind eating.” I wanted to spend as much time with him as I could. There was a part of me, though, that hesitated. It was that part of me that recognized I was getting in too deep.

  But I didn’t care.

  He got up, and I stayed where I was as he made his way into the bathroom, admiring the hard lines of his back, the snug curve of his butt and his long, muscled thighs. He emerged a few minutes later, wearing a pair of jeans and a shirt that hung open over his chest. His front was as drool-worthy as his back, and my breathing hitched as I recalled raking my nails down the chiseled lines of his torso, stroking the muscles of his abdomen and feeling them jump and bunch under my touch.

  His lids drooped as he caught sight of my face, but before he could make a move in my direction, I slid past him into the bathroom, carrying my dress.

  After freshening up, I tugged my clothes back on, save for my shoes, and left the bathroom to find the bedroom empty.

  A quick look around the place led me to the kitchen. Ryder was standing at the fridge and glanced back at me as I entered. “I’m going to make a sandwich. That sound good to you?”

  “It’s fine,” I assured him. I joined him at the island as he started to lay things out for our meal – deli slices, cheese, bread, mayonnaise. He cut up a tomato while I went about constructing my sandwich.

  A few short minutes later, we were sitting at the island, side by side, eating in companionable silence.

  I liked these quiet moments with him, more than I should. I kept having to remind myself that what we had was purely physical and I couldn’t lose sight of that. It hadn’t been a big concern the first time he’d touched me – the sexual chemistry between us had exploded out of control with that very first touch. But the more time I spent with him, the more…invested I felt.

  And that was dangerous.

  I didn’t want to lose some piece of myself to a guy who wouldn’t ever feel the same way.

  Ryder glanced at me, and I casually shifted my gaze away, focusing on the food in front of me rather than looking at him.

  I was starting to feel things that didn’t belong in this relationship, and I didn’t want him to guess at that.

  Ryder skimmed a hand up my back, and I shivered at the light, easy caress.

  I glanced at him from the corner of my eye and saw that he was staring at me. It was a familiar look, and like a moth drawn to the flame, I found myself turning to face him.

  He put his hands on my thighs, eased them up, dragging the material of my skirt to my hips. He bared my thighs almost completely, his thumbs resting in the grooves where hip met thigh.

  A hungry ache settled low in my belly, and I strained to get closer.

  He leaned in and pressed a kiss to my nape.

  Closing my eyes, I cupped the back of his head. The heat of his mouth on my skin, the way he raked his teeth down my neck was enough to have me shivering in reaction, and I knew he could sense my response.

  I slid off the stool and stood in front of him, stroking my hands up his hard thighs, down, up, down, up…when I reached the tops of his thighs on the second stroke, I reached down and cupped his cock, feeling him through the layers of denim and his shorts.

  I loved the feel of him.

  I opened my mouth to tell him just that.

  And the sound of the doorbell cut me off.

  Ryder lowered his head, not concerned with the sound. He kissed me, wrapping one arm around my waist and urging me closer. As his fingers splayed wide over my spine and lower back, I curled my arms around his neck.

  His kisses drove me crazy.

  I went to pop the button on his jeans, and the doorbell rang again, followed by a knock.

  Slowly, I pulled my hands back and met his eyes. “Maybe you should get that.”

  He didn’t respond. Instead, he reached up and cupped my face, stroking his thumb over my lower lip. With a deep exhalation, he nodded and slid off the stool.

  I gathered up the dishes and rinsed them off, slipping them into the dishwasher before leaving the kitchen.

  Ryder was still at the front door. I could hear his voice, low and intense.

  Some part of me recognized that the mood had been shattered, well and truly. I checked the time and decided I needed to get my things together and go. If I didn’t get to bed soon, I’d be a zombie in the morning.

  It didn’t take me long, and when I came down the main steps, I caught sight of Ryder still standing near the door, although he’d come inside. A woman was there too, just this side of the doorway. Her eyes skipped up to rest on me for a brief second, then she focused back on Ryder.

  Something about the way she stood there made my breath freeze up in my lungs.

  Something was wrong.

  I didn’t know what it was, but something was wrong.

  “How can you show up out of nowhere after all this time and tell me that she’d been pregnant?” Ryder demanded, unaware of my presence.

  I sucked in a breath.

  He heard me and turned to look in my direction, but his eyes were emotionless as he cut his gaze back to the other woman.

  “It’s a complicated matter,” she said in accented English. “Please, if you just let me explain…”

  An odd sound filled the air.

  Both Ryder and I stilled.

  I had to gulp in more air as I saw the small child seat on the floor next to the woman.

  The sound came again – a baby.

  My heart started to drum inside my chest, a hard, slow rhythm that was almost painful.

  The woman turned toward the child carrier and asked, “Can I get him out? We…I mean, I know we should talk.”

  Ryder nodded, his gaze locked on the small child in the carrier. Dressed in all blue, I guessed the boy to be close to a year old, already too long for the infant carrier.

  I forced my legs to move.

  He turned his head toward me as I walked down the steps.

  The woman gave me a miserable look. I lingered by the closet, waiting for Ryder to step aside so I could get my coat. When he didn’t move, I said softly, “I need to be getting home.”

  He looked like he wanted to say something, but in the end, he just stepped aside, and I opened the closet, pulling out my coat without looking at him or the woman.

  “I’m so sorry,” she said again, her voice low and soft.

  I shook my head and opened my mouth to say something. But what? I settled on, “Goodnight.”

  Without looking at Ryder, I slid out the door.

&
nbsp; I made it to my car and even started it, put it in reverse and backed up, all without letting myself think about what had just happened.

  But less than a block away, I pulled my car over to the side of the road and closed my eyes.

  Ryder was a father.

  I had no idea who the woman at his house had been, but Ryder knew her. I’d seen it in his eyes.

  I gripped the steering wheel tightly, staring off into the night.

  “It doesn’t matter,” I told myself. We only had a physical relationship. Whatever this was going on with the baby didn’t affect me at all.

  I wished I could make myself believe it.

  15

  Breanna

  I hadn’t slept worth shit.

  I’d spent half the night tossing and turning, and when I finally had fallen asleep, odd, weird dreams had chased me.

  Now I stood in the bathroom, the lights on, highlighting the evidence of said sleepless night.

  Staring at my reflection, I took in the shadowy eyes and my pallor. It was going to take some extra clever work with makeup if I wanted to avoid the inquisition when I went into work.

  I took my time with my hair and makeup, using blush to give me the color a sleepless night had sapped from my face.

  When I was done, I gave myself a critical study.

  I’d have to fool Stella into thinking nothing was wrong. I should also plan on drinking a lot of coffee because I’d need the caffeine to focus and get through the day.

  Dressed in one of my favorite pantsuits, I left my house just in time to make it to work before I’d be late.

  I didn’t want to get there early for the same reason I planned on not staying late. I didn’t want to give Stella, or anybody else, a chance to ask me what was going on.

  Armed with a grande mocha with two extra shots of espresso, I made my way to my cubicle, smiling and nodding at fellow co-workers who smiled and nodded back.

  So far, so good.

  I settled in at my desk and powered on my computer before tucking my purse away. When Stella appeared at the entrance of my cubicle, I pretended not to notice. It wouldn’t work for long, Stella would make sure of that, but I needed a few more seconds to steady myself.

  Nothing is wrong, I said mentally. You had a sleepless night. Everybody does from time to time.

  “Hey, you,” Stella said.

  I turned my head and looked at her, pretending to just now notice her presence.

  “Hey back. How is it going?” I asked, careful to keep my voice calm.

  I don’t know if it worked, but she didn’t say anything as she leaned against the wall of my cubicle and smiled. “We’re doing Mexican today for lunch. Sound good?”

  “I don’t know.” I shook my head and indicated my computer. “I’ve got a lot of work to get done.”

  “Don’t we all? It seems like we get busier all the time. Lukas mentioned hiring a few more employees. I hope he does. We’re all slammed.” She rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest. “But you’ve also got to eat. Don’t leave me and Tabitha alone to our own machinations.”

  Tabitha would be there…that was good. A nice barrier between me and the personal questions that Stella might proceed with if she realized something was up.

  Still…

  “Come on, Bree,” Stella said. “Since when do you not want to help yourself to chips and salsa?”

  She had a point.

  I hadn’t been able to stomach breakfast, but now the idea of salty chips, spicy salsa, and some good guacamole had my belly rumbling. She’d probably done it on purpose.

  “Fine.” I made a show of rolling my eyes and flashed her a smile. “Noon?”

  We agreed to drive over together, and Stella left to get to work, leaving me alone to do the same.

  I had information from Ryder’s group that I wanted to work into my new catalog proposal and marketing campaign. I didn’t really want to work on Ryder’s project right then, not until I’d made sense of the chaos going on in my brain, but I couldn’t put it off without breaking my promise to Stella either – my promise that a relationship with him wouldn’t interfere with my job.

  Blocking out all the mental crap, I worked on redoing the catalog, giving some pointers in the comments for the team that would take over where I’d left off if the project got approved.

  I also sent a proposal outlining a new approach to social media.

  I gave that project two hours of my morning then shifted attention to another small project I’d been assigned a couple days earlier.

  Work managed to keep me busy right on up to noon, and it took Stella tapping her nails on my desk to drag me out of the fog that had settled over me as I worked.

  Tipping my head back, I met her eyes, then eased back in the chair. My spine screamed in protest, and I reminded myself once again that I needed to work on my posture.

  “You ready to go eat?” Stella asked. Tabitha was at her shoulder, and both had already pulled on caps and coats.

  I nodded as I shut down, saving the work.

  “How’s that Howard project coming?” Stella asked as we made for the door to the employee parking lot.

  I nodded. “Well enough. The head of their marketing has a good eye, and she knows what she wants.”

  We talked a little about it, and I asked Stella about one of the non-profits she’d recently started working with. Her face glowed as she talked about the upcoming ball and auction, mentioning some of the people she’d gotten to donate.

  “I assume you and Lukas will be going,” I commented as we slid into Stella’s car.

  None of them wanted to ride in mine – I couldn’t really say I blamed them.

  “Yes, we’re going.” She gave me a curious look. “I can get tickets if you’d like to ask Ryder.”

  “We don’t have that kind of relationship,” I said, struggling to keep my tone even.

  I couldn’t quit thinking about the woman who’d shown up the night before, or the baby.

  Stella made a funny noise in her throat, but let it go, shifting her attention to Tabitha instead. “What about you? Anybody you’d like to have as a guest? I’d love to have a friend or two there.”

  Tabitha looked to be on the verge of a full-blown panic attack. “I don’t think so.”

  “My friends are abandoning me in my time of need,” Stella said, shaking her head.

  “I’m sure Lukas will keep you company,” I told her dryly.

  She grinned. “True. Which is why I won’t nag you about joining us – although you should. We’d have fun.”

  Maybe if things were different between Ryder and me, I’d consider it.

  As it was, I was still trying to figure out if things had changed between us last night, and how I felt about it.

  I tried to push the heavy thoughts aside, but I wasn’t successful. No sooner had the server taken our orders than Stella focused her big blue eyes on me. “Are you going to tell us what’s going on?”

  I reached for my soda, buying time as I took a slow drink. “I don’t know what you mean.”

  “You’re too quiet. You barely left your cubicle today and getting words out of you is like pulling teeth.” Stella shoved her hair back over her shoulder and braced her elbows on the table. “Now…spill.”

  “I’m fine,” I told her. She continued to watch me with speculation, and I sighed. Knowing she wouldn’t let it go, I made a mental decision. I’d tell her and Tabitha. They’d keep it quiet, and maybe if I talked about it, I could settle everything in my head.

  “I was with Ryder last night,” I started slowly.

  Stella snapped her fingers. “I knew it. I knew it had something to do with him.”

  “Okay, smarty-pants,” I said. “You figured that out. But you wouldn’t ever guess just what happened last night.”

  Hell, I was still having a hard time processing it, and I’d lain awake half the night thinking about it.

  I blew out a deep breath. “So…we were eating some sandwi
ches for dinner, and there’s a knock at the door. Ryder goes to answer it, and I head upstairs to get my things. It was getting late, and I wanted to go home and get some sleep. When I came down the stairs, Ryder was in the foyer with another woman.”

  Stella’s eyes widened.

  “They were just talking,” I rushed to reassure her. “But…well…what they were talking about was…intense.”

  I grabbed my soft drink and took a large gulp, wetting my dry throat.

  Stella pointed a finger at me. “If you don’t quit drawing this out, I’m going to strangle you.”

  “I’m not drawing it out. I’m just…look, you two can’t tell anybody.” I focused my eyes on Stella and added, “Not even Lukas. I don’t want Ryder knowing I was talking about it.”

  Stella crossed her heart and held up her hand. Tabitha shrugged when I looked at her. “I’ve got nobody to tell. You two are the only friends I’ve made since I moved here.”

  Normally, that would have drawn me to urge Tabitha to get out more, but I had other things on my mind that won out this time.

  “She had a baby with her,” I told them, blurting the news out, desperate to get it out in the open. “She was telling Ryder that…she told Ryder the baby was his.”

  Stella leaned back in her seat, wide-eyed and shocked. “You’re joking.”

  “No.” I shook my head. I blew out another breath, then reached for a chip and dabbed it in the salsa. I wasn’t hungry, but I needed to do something. Pacing was out of the question, so that left food.

  “What did you do?” Tabitha asked, her voice hushed.

  “Do?” I bit into the chip and chewed it, swallowed it down before answering. “There’s not much I can do.”

  “I mean…” Tabitha hesitated, then looked over at Stella.

  Stella picked up the ball, having clearly adjusted to what I’d just said. “Yeah, what did you do? Are you okay?”

  “I’m fine.” I forced a smile that I didn’t feel as I met her eyes. “I just…well, it was weird.”

  “I’ll say,” Stella replied. She crossed her arms over her chest and studied me. “If Lukas had some strange woman show up at the door claiming she’d had his baby, weird might just be one word that would describe it. I’ve got another – pissed. As in, I would be pissed.”