Our Shattered Pieces (The Pieces Series Book 3)
Page 9
After telling her all about the wedding, the six months since then, and all the way through our messaging yesterday, I waited for her insight to the situation.
Smiling kindly, she asked, “Does the possibility of finding your match in Molly make you nervous?”
I thought about that. “Not nervous, per se,” I replied. “More like a…too-good-to-be-true vibe.”
She nodded. “When was the last time you indulged, Grayson?”
“I don’t know,” I answered honestly. “But I do know it’s been years.” A long while ago, I had hooked up with a woman who had been a dirty fuck, but when things had started to get a little too dirty for her, things had gone south really quick.
The guilt had come crashing in like a wrecking ball, and the very thought that I had been doing something she hadn’t been onboard with had fucked me up good. So good, in fact, that I haven’t done anything beyond the basics in years. Since her.
Dr. Willis nodded again because she obviously remembered that session. “The benefit with exploring your desires with strangers is that, if things do end up badly, you have the time and space to work through the aftereffects. With Molly’s brother being married to your sister, you might not have the luxury of time and space from her, if this doesn’t work out. Has that occurred to you?”
I nodded. “That possibility existed the night of the wedding, but that hadn’t stopped us.”
“That night consisted of standard sex, though,” she pointed out. “That situation was safe, though a little ill-advised since she’s somewhat family. If you move forward with this, with her in particular, things could become dicey. Do you feel prepared for that possibility?”
“Maybe I’m kidding myself into believing that there isn’t a need to be.”
She cocked her head. “Why?”
“Molly’s the first woman whose expectations are clear,” I told her. “There’s no guessing where the line is. That site is designed, so that there is no confusion about what you’re looking for.” I shrugged. “I basically got a play-by-play of what she likes and doesn’t like. What’s more safer than that?”
She didn’t say anything for a bit, but then she asked, “Beyond the possible sexual compatibility, how do you feel about Molly, otherwise?”
“I like her,” I said, easily and readily. “I mean, what’s there not to like. The woman’s rich as fuck but dedicates her life to her charity organization instead of indulging in morning mimosas in the Hamptons on the regular.”
Studying me like all therapists, she asked, “Why didn’t you tell Rowan about the night of her wedding?” She cocked her head. “By all accounts, you and your sister are very close. With Molly being her sister-in-law, I’m surprised you wouldn’t have warned her of possible future awkwardness between you and Molly after that night.”
I shifted in my seat.
A sign of guilt, for sure.
“It felt too much like kissing and telling,” I admitted.
Her brows rose. “Even to Rowan?”
I nodded. “Molly’s just not anyone.”
Dr. Willis smiled kindly again. “And that’s the exact reason why I’m just asking that you consider all the ramifications of pursuing this thing with Molly,” she said. “I’m not telling you not to move forward with your attraction to her, I’m just asking you to make sure your eyes are wide open with this thing.” She crossed her legs. “Addictions are potent even when in hibernation, Grayson.”
I thought about that, and she was right. Just because I haven’t indulged since that night, all those years ago, that didn’t mean my cravings weren’t always there, lurking under the surface. Kind of like being on a diet. I might be satisfied with the meals I’ve prepared for myself, but that didn’t mean I’ve forgotten how good a fucking cupcake tastes like.
“You’re saying I shouldn’t trust her completely.”
“No, that’s not what I’m saying at all,” she corrected. “I’m just asking you to recognize the situation for what it is, regardless of if you trust her or not. A situation is never completely under control when you possess uncontrollable emotions, Grayson.”
“But I have them under control,” I argued. “I haven’t fed into my cravings for years.”
“Okay, how about I lay out a different scenario for you.” I nodded. “A non-violent man, a man who has never hurt another soul ever in his life, comes across someone ready to attack him. In the heat of the moment, he’s killed his attacker in a bid for survival.”
“Okay.”
“Survival instincts are ingrained in us. They are a part of our animal make up. During that inability to control that desperate need for survival, he kills another human being. Something he never imagined he’d ever do. Uncontrollable emotions in the middle of an uncontrollable situation have the potential for disastrous ramifications. And lust, next to wrath, is one of the most uncontrollable emotions on the list, Grayson.”
“Okay, Dr. Willis, now you’re scaring the fuck out of me,” I blurted.
She smiled that comforting smile of hers. “I’m not trying to scare you, Grayson,” she assured me. “You told me this entire thing had a too-good-to-be-true vibe, and I’m just advising you not to discount that feeling altogether. Because you’re right, Molly isn’t just like everybody else.”
“Is it cowardice or responsible to call this thing off with her?” I asked.
“It’s neither, Grayson,” she replied, telling me nothing. “Like most patients, I know you’re looking for a clear answer, definite permission, but I can’t give that for you. My job is to help you through your thoughts and emotions, not tell you what to do.”
I leaned back in my chair. “She feels right.”
“Right for the kind of sex you desire, or right for you?”
“Both,” I answered honestly. “She feels like both.”
“How about we schedule something for next month,” she suggested. “By then, this picture with you and Molly should be clearer, and we can talk more about it.”
I nodded. “I think that’s a good idea.”
After my appointment was over, I went to the gym, needing to work out some of my confusion. Normally, I left Dr. Willis’ office feeling good and confident, but this time, I was feeling the weight of her warnings, and I needed to work it out.
Then I needed to send another message to Molly.
Chapter 25
Molly~
It was past midnight, but the fundraiser had been a huge success, and I couldn’t help but feel good about it. All the planning, networking, and hard work had paid off, and a lot of good was done tonight.
Still riding the high, I was finding it hard to wind down. Still in my dress, I kicked off my heels, and grabbed my phone from my purse.
Pulled up my Ques?ionable.com account to be exact.
Grayson’s message was still teasing me, while I’d already deleted all of JustEnoughKink’s messages, after letting him know that I met someone more suitable to my needs. He’d been understanding and had left an open invitation for the future if things didn’t work out between me and Grayson.
Even though it was past midnight, and I knew Grayson wouldn’t see my message right now, I still replied to his demand of no other men.
SFP: Convince me why it should be yours, and yours only.
Chuckling, I tossed my phone on my bed, finished undressing and headed towards the shower. The thing about charity fundraisers and galas were that I had to look the part, and that included mountains of makeup, perfume, and mousse and hairspray for decades.
After washing away the night, I grabbed a pair of white panties and one of the many over-sized t-shirts I’ve stolen from my brother over the years and crawled into bed. However, when I went to plug my phone into the charger, I saw a new notification on my phone.
TCG: What part of my body do you want me to use to convince you?
Okay.
I wasn’t expecting that. However, it was the perfect opportunity for a test of sorts.
SFP:
Your mouth.
TCG: Good choice since there’s so much I can do with my mouth. Besides eating that delectable pussy of yours, it can also tell you what a hot, little slut you are with my dick buried deep in your ass.
Heat erupted in the pit of my stomach, and it rushed over my entire body in waves.
SFP: What makes you think I’d let you in there?
TCG: Because that’s what cum sluts do, baby. They let their man fill up all those tight holes.
I had to steady my breathing at that one. While calling me a cum slut was firing up all the sickness in my head, I was more focused on how he had called himself my man.
SFP: But you’re not my man.
TCG: That’s where you’re wrong, M.
I ignored that and the butterflies fluttering in the pit of my stomach.
SFP: What are you doing up so late?
TCG: If you must know, I was jacking off to fantasies of cumming all over that face of yours. I was tugging my dick to the image of fucking you while you wore my cum all over your face and tits.
There was no turning back now. Even if this was a bad idea-which it was, for so many damn reasons-my body wanted this man. Hell, my mind wanted this man. I wanted him to show me what he was capable of. I wanted…I wanted to know there was someone like me out there.
I wanted to know that there was someone else out there who came from a good family and had a good job and was a good person but had the same sick issues as I did. It made me feel less shattered about my desires. It made me feel less like a freak. If Grayson had the same sick sexual desires as I had, and he was a great guy, then maybe it was okay to be me, after all.
SFP: What else?
TCG: You want to hear how I want to choke you with my cock while you gag like a whore?
SFP: Yes.
TCG: You want to hear me tell you what a good, little slut you are while I stretch all your fuckholes out? You want to hear how I want to slap that fucking perfect face of yours with my cock?
My body was hot, my pussy was wet, and desire was drowning me with each message he sent. Not only did I want to hear it all, but I also wanted to feel it all. I wanted to experience it all.
Switching from onsite messaging, I sent Grayson a text from my phone. Even though I trusted the site, sending my address through the messaging system felt reckless. Websites got hacked all the time.
Me: 1450 Gardener Ave. Apt. 503
I got an immediate reply.
Grayson: Open the door naked or else ur clothes are history
Me: Hurry
I didn’t care how desperate that made me sound. I want this. I wanted him. I wanted him to make good on his promises. And I wanted to be able to wake up in the morning, and not feel guilty.
I was counting on Grayson to be able to do that for me.
I was counting on Grayson for a lot.
Chapter 26
Grayson~
Like any man tempted with the woman of his dreams, I ignored Dr. Willis’ advice about taking it slow and going in with my eyes wide open.
When Molly had texted me to hurry, I’d been out of my house and ready to break traffic laws to get to her. Like an addict with permission to backslide, I was practically foaming at the mouth to get my hands on Molly Cavanaugh.
Making it to her apartment building, my heart was galloping in my chest as she buzzed me in. Hoping not to have a heart attack before I got inside the woman, I worked on my breathing and goddamn sanity while riding up in the elevator.
To say Molly lived in an apartment would be an understatement. The building she lived in was exactly what you’d imagine it to be, living in the Forest Glen neighborhood. However, as magnificent as the building was, I wasn’t here to sightsee. Right now, I couldn’t give a fuck what Molly’s apartment looked like.
Knocking on door 504, my foot tapped impatiently, and my fingers were drumming along the door frame. That’s what you got when you announce to a crack addict that they’re giving away free crack.
You get a man close to losing his goddamn mind.
As soon as Molly opened the door, there was only one thing I could think of as I took in her appearance. “That fucking Texas A&M shirt better be your brother’s.” I knew Molly had gone to UC Berkeley and Lorcan had gone to Texas A& M, but you could never be too sure.
Those grey eyes of hers flared, and it was a good thing she liked possessiveness because I was going to be possessive as hell with this woman.
“It’s Lorcan’s,” she confirmed. “I stole it from him years ago.”
I crossed the threshold and had her face in my hands as kicked the door closed behind me. “Give them all back,” I told her. “You can raid my closet this weekend for whatever you need.”
“Grays-”
My lips crashed against hers. I didn’t want to hear her say anything other than yes. I didn’t want to hear her say I was being ridiculous or moving too fast or not allowed to make demands.
Molly started kissing me back, and when she moaned in my mouth, thunder rumbled deep in my veins. Like the warning of an uncontrollable storm ready to tear apart anything in its path. I could feel myself losing control, and it was just one fucking kiss. A kiss I’ve already experienced before.
I knew what Molly tasted like. I knew what it felt like to kiss her, what it felt like to eat her pussy, and what it felt like to fuck her hard and deep.
But this was different.
This was everything.
Sliding one hand up the back of her neck to tangle in her ebony locks, I slid the other one in the opposite direction, across her neck, over her tit, and down her stomach until my fingers were sliding through her wet folds.
Molly was fucking soaked.
Playing with her wetness, I broke off the kiss. Our chests heaving and my mouth tasting the skin underneath her jaw, I growled, “Did you already fuck yourself, or is all that cream for me? Are you soaked because you want my cock so badly?”
Molly moaned. “It’s for you.”
Because she was so soaked, it was nothing to slide two fingers inside her at once. “Fuck, you’re so wet for it.” She didn’t comment, just kept moaning and riding my hand, and that was perfectly fine with me. Molly in the heat of passion was a beautiful sight.
When I couldn’t stand it any longer, I scooped up as much of her cream as I could and made the first move to test everything she had promised she was game for.
Pulling back, I took my sticky fingers and rubbed them all over her lips and cheek. Her eyes flared like a fucking drug addict’s glazed look and I almost shot my load in my pants. She let me make a mess of her face, and even licked her fucking lips.
I yanked my shirt over my head, and I immediately felt Molly’s hands on the waistband of my jeans. I looked down and let her release me, and I let out a dark hiss when her feminine hand wrapped around my hard heat.
With blood rushing through my ears, my heart threatening to beat clean out of my chest, my desperation was showing. My mind was telling me to ease into it, but the sickness that’d been doormat for too long was not with that plan. Everything that was wrong with me was begging me to take Molly at her word and believe her.
With nerves and sick desire hallowing out the pit of my stomach, I grabbed Molly by her hair and pushed her to her knees. Locking her grey eyes to mine, I said, “Suck my cock, baby.” I could see her entire body shutter, and I couldn’t have stopped the next words out of my mouth even with a gun to my head. “Swallow it, slut. Show me what a good, little cocksucker you are.” Molly moaned, and when she took the head of my cock into her mouth, my knees almost gave out on me.
My hands tightened in her hair, and my hips started taking over. I began to fuck her face, and she let me. The pleasure was enough to make me want to close my eyes and drop my head back, but the sight of Molly on her knees, trying to take my length, was too beautiful to ignore.
“That’s it, baby,” I encouraged when she gagged a bit. “Choke on my cock.”
With Molly’s hands plante
d against my thighs, she let the tears stream down her face, and my dick was slick with her saliva as I forced her to take as many inches as she could. And soon, that familiar sensation gathered at the bottom of my spine, and I was ready to cum.
“Where do you want it?” I asked her, my hands gathering as much of her hair away from her face as I could. “I’m cumming, baby. I’m cumming, and I need you to tell me where you want it.”
Molly pulled off my dick long enough to answer, “Everywhere.” Relief was like a cooling balm flowing throughout my body, and with her mouth back on my dick, the first shot of release into her hot mouth nearly put my back out.
Before the second wave erupted, I growled, “Open up, slut.” Tilting her head back, Molly opened her mouth, stuck out her tongue, and I pulled out just in time to see a rope of white thickness shoot out and land across her right cheek and lips. The third release landed on her neck and tits. And the fourth one landed on her waiting tongue.
Wicked compulsion took over, and my hand reached down to smear my release all over her skin. Remaining on her knees, Molly let me, and her eyes were so dilated with carnal want, I wasn’t sure I was ever going to let her go after this.
Hooking my hand around the back of her neck, I hauled her to her feet, and did something I’ve never done before.
I kissed her with my release massaged into her skin and lips.
And I didn’t fucking care.
Chapter 27
Molly~
He hadn’t been lying.
Grayson hadn’t been lying when he said we were on the same page sexually. Everything he said and did, he did it with a fluidness that came naturally. Calling me a slut had rolled off his tongue with ease. Taking over, with me on my knees, had been automatic. And when he had yanked me to my feet, and had smeared his cum all over my skin, he hadn’t been disgusted.
In fact, he had kissed me.
He was still kissing me.
I went to push his jeans all the way off, and helping me along, Grayson started kicking off his shoes. Breaking off the kiss, he ordered, “Take it all fucking off, Molly.” I quickly complied and began removing my clothes as Grayson finished undressing himself.