Story Time

by Edward Bloor

Dr. Austin clapped him on both shoulders. "Now you're talking! First, she would want us to get rid of that machine. It's now her murder weapon."

  Bud looked from Susan's skeleton to the Laser Cannon, and back to the skeleton until he understood. "Oh yeah. We need to get rid of that crazy contraption."

  Dr. Austin pointed at the Laser Cannon. "Unplug it, wheel it down to the basement, and push it into the furnace. That will destroy all the electronics inside. Then it'll just be a big glob of metal with no fingerprints on it."

  "But what about Susan?"

  "I'll get the shower curtain. We'll cover her and leave her here, just until we find the First Lady."

  Bud mumbled, "Until we find the First Lady."

  "We can't let the First Lady leave! Not until we've explained everything that happened. We have to tell her the whole truth." Dr. Austin walked daintily forward. He turned Susan's chair so that it faced the wall. Then he helped Bud wheel out the Laser Cannon, adding, "And I think I know just what to tell her."

  ***

  Kate, George, June, William, Molly, and Mrs. Brennan expelled a loud, collective breath. They all rose to their feet again.

  "We are incredibly lucky we stayed back here," George said. "Those morons forgot to shut off the Laser Cannon. It could have tracked over here and zapped all of us."

  Kate asked, "Is that lady dead?"

  "She's about as dead as you can get. Excavated Egyptian mummies look better than that."

  "Then we'd better get out of here." Kate turned to the oldest member of the group. "Mrs. Brennan, can you go back up the ladder?"

  "Yes, if I have to. If my life depends on it. But couldn't we just walk through Mr. Whittaker's office?"

  Kate looked at the rotating door. "Yeah. Maybe we could. Let Uncle George and me check it out first."

  But before Kate and George could move, they heard another sound. All six looked at each other in alarm. Then they all crept, quietly and efficiently, back behind the bookcase.

  Kate raised her head. The first thing she saw was the barrel of a BioSensor. It was followed by the trembling arms of Agent Pflaum. He entered the secret room with the First Lady three feet behind him. She was no longer smiling.

  Agent Pflaum stopped suddenly. He aimed the BioSensor at the back of the smoking chair and checked the weapon's digital readout. He announced, "It's okay, Madam First Lady. Whatever is on that chair is not a living life-form. We're safe to hide in here."

  Agent Pflaum started to get the First Lady a chair, but he got his foot tangled in a piece of white twine. This action caused the book cart to move. It bumped the desk just hard enough to make the chair spin around slowly.

  Susan Singer-Wright's still-smoking skeleton rotated and came to a halt, face-to-face, with him.

  Agent Pflaum screamed and dropped his BioSensor on the First Lady's foot. The First Lady looked down at her foot and cried out in pain. Then she looked up and saw the skeleton. She, too, screamed.

  Agent Pflaum fumbled into his holster, attempting to pull out his revolver, but he dropped that, too.

  The First Lady dived for the floor and snatched it up. She jumped to her feet holding the weapon in both hands. She took aim at Susan Singer-Wright's skeleton and started firing. Screaming and firing. She fired until the bullets ran out, causing the skeleton to spin around and around and around in the chair.

  Just as the revolver's chambers were emptied, Bud Wright and Dr. Austin ran back in with the blue shower curtain.

  The bullet-riddled chair was still spinning.

  Bud looked from Dr. Austin, to Agent Pflaum, to the First Lady of the United States. He asked her simply, "Madam First Lady, why are you shooting at my wife?"

  43. An Alleged Incident That Never Really Happened

  Kate rose to her knees and peeked above the bookcase. The four people standing before Susan Singer-Wright's smoking corpse had not moved much.

  Agent Pflaum remained frozen in his spot, staring in horror at the skeleton in the chair.

  The First Lady, still clutching the revolver, was muttering under her breath, disjointed statements such as "Reading is fundamental" and "Breakfast is the most important meal of the day."

  Bud Wright was listening to her, and nodding, with a confused look on his face.

  Dr. Austin was clutching and unclutching his blue shower curtain, hoping there still might be a way to remove the body.

  Then Agent McCoy's voice called from the outer office. "Pflaum? Are you in there?"

  Rosetta Turner appeared in the doorway. "Madam First Lady, are you all right?"

  The First Lady said, without emotion, "I believe we need to educate every child."

  Rosetta answered tentatively, "Yes, ma'am."

  Rosetta took two steps into the secret room and stopped still. Her face paled, and she gasped, "Oh lordy."

  From her hidden perch, Kate watched as the First Lady's chief of staff absorbed the various elements of the gruesome scene. Then, slowly, she removed the revolver from the First Lady's grip. She told Agent McCoy, in a low voice, "I'll take care of the live lady; you take care of the dead one."

  Agent McCoy took control of the revolver. "Okay. Agent Pflaum? Agent Pflaum! Snap out of it!"

  Agent Pflaum rotated his whole body to stare at his superior. "Yes, sir," he croaked.

  "Take that shower curtain. Cover that corpse with it, and wheel it out of here."

  Dr. Austin told them, with quiet determination, "No. This is my shower curtain. You can't take it."

  "This is a matter of national security, Doctor. We'll get you another shower curtain."

  Dr. Austin was unmoved. "But it won't be this one. No. You can take her in something else."

  Agent McCoy stared at Dr. Austin in disbelief. Then he snatched the shower curtain away, thrust it into Agent Pflaum's hands, and pushed him toward Susan's corpse. "Get her out of here!"

  "But, but where? Where should I put her?"

  Agent McCoy looked at Rosetta.

  Rosetta covered the First Lady's ears. "We have two corpses up in the cooler already."

  McCoy ordered, "Take her upstairs and stash her with the other two." He helped Pflaum tuck the shower curtain into the sides of the chair. Then he helped him guide the chair out Susan's bracelets jangled with every bump.

  Bud watched his wife go. He muttered, "Good-bye, little buttercup."

  Rosetta turned to her boss. "Are you feeling any better, Madam First Lady? That dead lady has gone away now."

  The First Lady's smile twitched.

  Agent McCoy returned quickly with two other agents, a man and a woman. He told Rosetta, "These agents will take the First Lady upstairs. We've secured the roof for the helicopter's arrival." The man and woman each took an elbow and guided the First Lady through the door.

  As Kate leaned left to watch them, her sweaty hand slipped on the floor and she nearly fell. She held her breath and ducked, fearing she had been heard.

  But Rosetta was addressing Dr. Austin. "Tell me, Doctor, how many witnesses were there to this unfortunate event?"

  Dr. Austin pointed at Bud. "Just the two of us."

  Rosetta exchanged a purposeful look with Agent McCoy. "Then we need to talk about some matters, some national security matters."

  Dr. Austin understood immediately. "Yes, of course."

  Kate moved to get a better view. She straightened herself up as slowly as an opening flower. She turned her head so that only her right eye appeared above the bookcase.

  Dr. Austin was now standing directly in front of Rosetta Turner. He snapped his lapels and spoke with his old authority. "Not only does this unfortunate event look bad for the Whittaker Magnet School, it also looks bad for the First Lady of the United States."

  Rosetta selected her words carefully. "I knew you would understand. After all, the First Lady is known for advocating two things: better schools and gun control."

  Rosetta held both hands in front of her, in a shooting position. "Now, the way I see the situation is this: The First Lady fi
red a gun into a corpse." She looked over at Bud. "Am I correct in saying that, sir? Your wife was dead when this accident occurred?"

  Bud answered, "Yeah. I guess so."

  Rosetta turned to Agent McCoy. "Then there is no question that it was simply an accidental discharge of a legal weapon into a nonliving thing."

  Agent McCoy shrugged. "No question."

  Rosetta turned back to Dr. Austin and Bud. "Still, to the media or to a political rival, this would not look good. Are you following me, gentlemen?"

  They nodded.

  "In Washington, perception is reality. We four can redefine what happened here, and we can present it to the media together. Are you still with me?"

  "Yes!" Dr. Austin answered. "Absolutely!"

  "So, this alleged shooting incident never really happened."

  "No, it never did," Dr. Austin agreed. Then he added, "And this crazy 'ghost in the building' incident never really happened, either."

  "Ghost?" Rosetta shook her head and turned to include McCoy. "I think we can agree on that, too. Nobody here believes in ghosts."

  McCoy nodded his assent.

  But suddenly, from behind the low bookcase, a sharp voice startled them all. "Oh no! No, you don't!"

  June scrambled to her feet and harangued them with all the force she could muster. "This really happened! People have been telling me it didn't happen for ten years. But it did happen! And no one is going to say it didn't."

  Rosetta exchanged an astonished look with McCoy. She whispered, "Who are you?"

  "I am a witness. I saw everything."

  Kate straightened to her full height and moved next to her mother. "Me, too."

  She was followed by George. "So did I."

  Rosetta stepped toward the bookcase. "Lord almighty! How many of you are hiding back there?"

  George told her, "Six, ma'am."

  Molly rose and helped her grandmother to her feet. William then stood up awkwardly to complete the picture—the very upsetting picture—that now confronted Rosetta Turner.

  Rosetta asked, "George Melvil, what exactly did you see?"

  "More than any sixth grader should have, ma'am."

  Rosetta looked down the line of witnesses. "All of you?"

  "All of us," Kate answered.

  Rosetta seemed to meditate for a moment, with her eyes closed. Then she opened them, whipped out her WebWizard X, and held it high. "All right. Let's talk about what is best for all involved here. Dr. Austin, can we use your office? I will need access to a printer."

  Dr. Austin glared at the new witnesses. "Yes, I suppose so. If we have to."

  "Please go down there, all of you, and wait for me. I need to speak privately to Agent McCoy."

  Dr. Austin raised his hand. "Certainly. But before we do, is there any chance that I could talk to the First Lady one more time?"

  "None whatsoever. Absolutely none. It is a complete impossibility."

  He lowered his hand. "Thank you, anyway."

  Dr. Austin quickly led Bud and the six witnesses out of the secret room as Rosetta and Agent McCoy leaned their heads together.

  44. A Deal with the Devil's Advocate

  In the time it took for Rosetta Turner to walk down the short stretch of hallway, she had typed up an official statement on the Web Wizard X. Upon entering Dr. Austin's office, she waved the WebWizard at his laser printer, causing it to switch on and to roll out four copies.

  Rosetta held the copies up to the group. "What I have in my hand is the official statement describing what happened here today. It contains no mention of guns; it contains no mention of ghosts."

  She passed out the copies to Dr. Austin, Bud, June, and Mrs. Brennan. "In exchange for signing the statement, I am offering each of you one wish. That's the deal, people. You sign, and one wish of yours comes true."

  Rosetta took a place near the door with her WebWizard X in hand. Then she pointed at a spot two feet in front of her on the floor.

  The group members all looked at each other in confusion, until she said, "Line up!"

  Bud Wright and Dr. Austin moved quickly. Bud, in spite of his neck brace, managed to get to the spot on the floor first, elbowing ahead of Dr. Austin. June and Mrs. Brennan hung back politely.

  Rosetta checked her watch and frowned. Usually a woman of a few well-chosen words, she spoke slowly and elaborately. "I am not, mind you, your fairy godmother. I cannot turn a pumpkin into a carriage, or better yet into a Ferrari 456. I am the First Lady's chief of staff. As such, I can make things happen for you in Washington, D.C.

  "That being said, I want you all to pick something good. I want you to leave here happy and determined to keep up your end of the bargain. Wishes can come true, but they can also come untrue. You will discover that, should you ever break your word. Don't forget what happened to that pumpkin carriage at the stroke of midnight. Now, assuming that we understand each other, let's get started."

  Rosetta looked at Bud, and he spoke up right away. "I want the Department of the Interior to approve my Ivy League Estates housing development."

  "I see. And what about those chipmunks in the woods?"

  "What about 'em?"

  Rosetta consulted her Web Wizard X. She started hitting buttons and reading screens. "All right. Here's what we can do: We can move the chipmunks to a national park." Rosetta turned the tiny display screen so that Bud could see it. "There's a national park in Wyandot County, just seventy-five miles from here."

  Bud was wary. "And they wouldn't come back?"

  Rosetta fixed a meaningful look at him. "Not unless we brought them back"

  Bud gulped. "Okay. That sounds good to me. Where do I sign?"

  Rosetta held out the paper for him to sign. Bud hooted, "It's moving day for Chip and Dale!" He turned and offered to high-five with Dr. Austin, who ignored him.

  Dr. Austin spoke eagerly to Rosetta, "I'm next!"

  "All right. What does the good doctor wish?"

  "I wish for the president of the United States to come to the Whittaker Magnet School."

  Rosetta eyeballed him. "Let me ask you something: If the president comes to visit this school, will there be students in it?"

  Dr. Austin squinted. "Do you want there to be students in it?"

  "Yes."

  "Then, yes! Absolutely."

  "Will they be healthy-looking students?"

  Dr. Austin squirmed. "They will. They will be." He added, "Hodges was a nut with those protein supplements. I can see that now. They'll all be eating ... apples and ... grapes from here on out."

  "And will they be exercising?"

  "Oh, yes, ma'am. They'll do ... jumping jacks and things like that. Outside. Every day."

  "Then I'll see what I can do." Rosetta gave him the form and watched as he signed it. Then she asked, "Who's next?"

  June and Mrs. Brennan each extended a hand, indicating that the other should go first. But June prevailed when she said, "No. You go. I'm not ready yet."

  Mrs. Brennan said, "Are you sure, dear?"

  "I'm sure. I need to talk to my daughter first." June inclined her head toward the window. Kate left the other children and joined her there. June bent close to Kate and began to whisper urgently as Mrs. Brennan stepped forward.

  Rosetta looked up expectantly.

  "I have a wish that is well within your powers," Mrs. Brennan said. "I want to get the Palace Theatre placed on the National Registry of Historic Buildings."

  Bud snorted. "Now hold on a dang minute!"

  Rosetta snapped, "You keep it zipped over there." She looked at Mrs. Brennan. "Where is this theater?"

  "It's right here in town. It has been a part of our local history since eighteen forty-one."

  "You're right. That is well within my powers. Just sign your name here."

  Molly had listened proudly as her grandmother made her wish, but George and William had never taken their eyes off of Kate and June. George leaned toward William and predicted, "This is it. She's getting her out of Whittaker."
r />   William agreed. "Yeah. That's gotta be it."

  When June finally took her place in front of Rosetta Turner, she had Kate standing next to her, holding tightly on to her hand. Tears welled up in June's eyes, but she wiped them with her free hand and whispered to Rosetta Turner, "Can I ask for anything?"

  "Anything connected with the government. That covers a lot of things."

  June took a deep breath. "All right. I want you to set Orchid the Orca, and all the other prisoners of this place, free."

  George and William gasped. Bud Wright started to snort.

  Rosetta asked, incredulously, "What? The big fish?"

  "I believe she is an aquatic mammal. I want her to be returned to the ocean."

  Rosetta was clearly impressed. She switched to a secure channel on the Web Wizard X and punched in numbers. "That is doable."

  Bud finally found his voice. "No! That orca's my property!"

  Rosetta cocked her head. "Do I hear the sound of chipmunks returning?" Bud shut up. "Sign here, ma'am. I know someone in the Department of the Interior who'd be very happy to arrange that for you." She extended the contract to June.

  George, William, and Molly all looked at Kate, confounded. Kate raised her free hand into the air and formed it into a fist.

  June took the contract, but she held it down at her side. "We're not finished."

  Rosetta replied, politely but firmly, "The deal was one wish, ma'am."

  June agreed. "And I made my wish." She looked at Dr. Austin and Bud. "It was to free all the prisoners of this place."

  Rosetta considered her words. "Okay. You did say that. So, it's the fish and what else?"

  "I want you to arrange for the release of Pogo, and the can man, and all of the homeless people."

  This time, it was Dr. Austin's turn to protest. "Those people are criminals!"

  Rosetta didn't even look at him. "Pipe down, shorty." She asked June, "What's a Pogo?"

  "Her name is Miss Pogorzelski." June spelled it, letter by letter, as Rosetta input it into the Web Wizard X. June added, "She works here at the library."

  "All right. I can arrange that, so long as she isn't a serial killer or anything."

  June looked quickly at Kate.

  Kate shrugged.