Daydreamer

by Brea Brown

  Daydreamer

  Brea Brown

  Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  Chapter 30

  Chapter 31

  Chapter 32

  Chapter 33

  Chapter 34

  Chapter 35

  Also by Brea Brown

  About the Author

  About the Publisher

  Copyright © 2019 by Wayzgoose Press. (Note: An earlier, slightly modified edition of this novel, with the same title, was originally published in 2010, ISBN 978-1484036112.)

  All rights reserved.

  No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the publisher, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  Edited by Dorothy Zemach

  Cover design by Keri Knutson at alchemybookcovers.com

  To my husband, family, and friends, who have given me unlimited support and encouragement. Thank you all.

  1

  Real life sucks. It’s too… real. And bound by things like physics and economics, two subjects that have always boggled my mind. And mortality, which always seems to be getting in my way. That’s why I lead a relatively active fantasy life. I think it comes from having a more-than-relatively boring real life. But who needs real life when you can have fantasies, which are, frankly, much better?

  In my fantasies, I have a glamorous job that challenges my mind and fetches me a nice salary but doesn’t require me to ever really work. I live in a London maisonette with gleaming surfaces. I drive a tiny, fast car that costs twice as much as it should just because it has a recognizable emblem on its hood. But I don’t care, because I can afford it. I date (and let’s be honest, screw) a lot of famous, wealthy, and interesting men (Colin Firth and Robert Pattinson are regular boy-toys of mine on either end of the age spectrum), who think I’m oh-so-cool and irresistible. I travel to exotic locales with my money and men. We eat fancy foods and drink expensive wines. I never have to work out or iron clothes or pay bills or eat alone. I have a fabulous fantasy life.

  Who needs real life?

  Today, however, in my real life, a little bit of fascinating has walked through the glass and metal doors on the tenth floor, right past the cubicle I inhabit 40 hours a week.

  Lisa, one of the other administrative assistants in the mid-sized architectural firm where I work, sidles up to my desk.

  “Who’s the new guy? I hear he’s not from around here…”

  “He’s from England,” I try to say casually, keeping my eyes on my computer monitor, where I’m supposedly filling out a PDF permit application. “Name’s Jude Something-or-Other.”

  Weatherington. I know his last name, of course. But how dorky would it be to admit that?

  “Jude, as in ‘Jude Law,’ sexy Brit?” She growls and paws at the air like a cat in heat.

  “He looks nothing like Jude Law,” I object quickly. “He’s more like… well… I don’t know. I can’t think of anyone right now. He’s kind of unique-looking. In a good way.”

  She studies me until I feel the urge to run away. “Wait a minute… Does someone have a little crush already?”

  “Don’t be a moron.”

  “You do!” She leans around me and hisses into the cubicle across the aisle, “Zoe, get over here. Libby seems to have found a guy who finally meets her high standards.”

  Zoe scurries to my desk and looks around nervously to make sure none of the higher-ups are around to see us goofing off. “Who? What’s his name? What’s he like?”

  “I don’t even know him, much less have a ‘crush’ on him.” I glare at Lisa and adjust the blouse that’s been hanging awkwardly on me all day, making a mental note to toss it in the back of the closet when I get home, ostensibly to give away to charity, but more likely for it to sit there for months until I see it and think, Oh, I haven’t worn that in a while, and wear it again for another torturous day of tugging and yanking.

  I’m imagining a smarter version of me pinning a note to it so that doesn’t happen, when Lisa says, “Stop daydreaming about the new guy for a second and help us decide where to go to lunch.”

  “Shhh!” I slap her arm. “Shut up!” I poke my head up like a clerical prairie dog and scan the area for him.

  There he is, in his office with the door closed, blinds wide open on the windows. His back’s to me as he stands in the middle of the room, seemingly doing nothing. Except looking beautiful in his tailored suit and shiny shoes. He shrugs off his jacket, revealing the silky back of one of those vests that I thought could only look good on Simon Baker or David Beckham. Oh, was I wrong! It looks really good on him. Really good. After running his hand through his hair, he seems to regret it and spends a few seconds trying to resettle the tousled dark-honey-colored strands. Then he spins so suddenly, I don’t have time to duck out of his sight, so I simply turn slightly and pretend I’m inspecting the leaves on the potted plant on my bookshelf.

  “You’re so immature,” I accuse Lisa (and myself).

  Zoe disappears for a second and reappears with an armful of office supplies: a stapler, staples, tape dispenser, pens, two grease pencils, paper clips, a staple remover, a bottle of correction fluid, and a letter opener. “Here. Take these into his office for him. Strike up a conversation.”

  I stare at the items, then up at her. “Zoe, he doesn’t need half of that shit. That’s what we’re here for.”

  Reassessing her stash, she unloads everything onto my desk except the grease pencils, pens, and tape dispenser. “Okay, just take these then.”

  Lisa says, “Yeah. It doesn’t matter if he needs them; it’s just an in to get him to talk to you.”

  “Whatcha guys doin’?”

  The three of us flinch guiltily.

  Lisa recovers first. “Nunya, Leslie.”

  Leslie narrows her eyes and smirks. “Very funny, Lisa. As in ‘nunya business’?”

  “Exactly. See ya.”

  Leslie isn’t shaken that easily. “I don’t know about you guys, but I’m swamped.” She looks at the random office supplies on my desk and in Zoe’s hands. “Swap meet?” She grabs the stuff from Zoe and says, “Hey, you know who probably needs this? The new guy. Have you seen him? He is delicious with a capital ‘Come to mama.’ And wait until you hear him talk… I’d be okay with him just reading the building directory to me.”

  “Good,” Lisa snipes, “since that’s about all he’d probably be willing to read to you.”

  “We’ll see about that,” Leslie replies with a smirk. “I think I’ll go welcome him to the company and let him know I’m available… for all his administrative needs.” She licks her bright red lips suggestively and strides away, an extra wiggle in her hips.

  “Guh-ross,” Lisa says when she’s gone. “What a tart.”

  It’s just as well. There’s no way I’d want to introduce myself to him wearing this shirt, anyway.

  I try to think of the perfect thing to wear when I do meet h
im. Black’s always good. I have a black pencil skirt that makes me look twenty pounds lighter. And I look great in purple. I have a purple, fitted satin wrap-around number that I always feel sexy in. I mean, professional. I feel professional in it, which is how I want to look. Since this is a professional setting.

  “And who is this?” he’ll say, appraising me.

  “Libby Fletcher,” I’ll answer confidently, offering him my firm hand to shake.

  “Indeed. Libby Fletcher, it’s very nice to meet you. But I have to warn you, I’m high maintenance.” He’ll raise his thick eyebrows provocatively.

  “Well, you’ll get over that quickly here,” I’ll flirt back, “Unless you’re in the habit of bringing presents to the admins. Then you can be as high-maintenance as you want.”

  He’ll laugh at my wittiness and predict, “I think I’m going to like you, Libby Fletcher.”

  2

  That was three weeks ago. Our actual first meeting went like this:

  “Oh, hey, Libby, I want you to meet Jude Weatherington,” Gary, Vice President of Commercial Accounts, said as he passed me while I was on the way to my desk after visiting the break room.

  I was dabbing at a mustard stain on the left breast of my hideous aforementioned blouse. My attention to the stain was making it worse; my attention to the breast was making my nipple stick out through my shirt. At the mention of my name, closely followed by Jude’s, I pulled the shirt away from my chest and stood at an odd angle to him, hoping he couldn’t see the stain. Or my nipple, when I had to let go of my shirt to shake his hand.

  I’m sure he was too distracted by my flaming face to notice anything below my neck anyway.

  “Libby, was it?” Jude asked pleasantly.

  Sometimes the simplest questions are the trickiest ones. “Uh… yes. Yep. I’m Libby.”

  He looked at me and smiled slowly. “Are you sure?”

  Gary said, “Libby’s one of the admins for our division. Along with Lisa, Leslie, and Zoe. Any one of them can help you if you need it.” To me, he said, “We’re on our way to see Wanda to get Jude a key to the floor. Have you seen her around, by chance?”

  I nodded mutely, staring at the dimple in Jude’s otherwise smooth left cheek.

  When neither of them said anything else and just stood there in front of me, I realized they needed more information from me than that.

  “Oh! Yeah. She’s around here somewhere. I thought I saw her in her office when I was on my way to the break room.” My mention of that room reminded me of my stain, so I snuck my hand back up and cupped my breast in an effort to hide it.

  That time, Jude did notice. He glanced down, then back up very quickly, blushing.

  “Nice to meet you,” I blurted, rushing away from them, wondering if it was possible for me to be any more socially awkward. I was pretty sure it wasn’t.

  Since then, we’ve barely uttered two words to each other in real life. For some reason, he doesn’t like to ask the boob-touching admin for her help. Go figure.

  In Libby’s Fantasy World (a.k.a. “LFW”), however, we’ve had numerous conversations and two dates. I’ve found out that he’s a romantic who loves to write poetry in his spare time. He’s even written me a poem (it was beautiful—something about my lips reminding him of dew-kissed butterflies). We’ve also played tennis together, and he let me win. What a gentleman! We’ve discussed our favorite movies, of which we have several in common, including anything about the British royal family. Oh, I almost forgot! We spent a wonderful afternoon at a Cubs game. The Cubs won, of course. Yes, our relationship is progressing quite nicely in LFW.

  When I told Dr. Marsh, my therapist, about the latest subject of my fantasies, he stopped me about five minutes in. “Now, wait. Let me get this straight. This is a person you work with? In real life?”

  I nodded and tried to continue, but he interrupted me again. “Whoa. Back up a second.” He paused to jot something down in his notes. Then he set his pen down and moved his glasses from his nose to the top of his closely shaved head. Not for the first time, I found myself thinking he looks like that cartoon superhero, the Green Lantern. He licked his full lips and seemed to be thinking hard about what to say to me next.

  I got tired of waiting and anticipated his comment. “What?” You told me that my fantasies were completely normal and healthy.”

  “They are,” he affirmed. “Usually.”

  “You’re saying my fantasies about this guy aren’t healthy?”

  He answered my question with a question. “Do you think it’s healthy to fantasize about someone you work with? Every day?”

  I sat up straighter in the leather chair. “Well, I don’t really work with him every day. At all. He just happens to work at the same company as me. We haven’t worked together a single time since he’s been with the company, as a matter of fact.”

  “Okay…” Dr. Marsh tapped his fingers on the arm of his chair and smiled.

  “What?”

  “You’re being awfully pedantic.”

  Defensively, I replied, “Your concern is that I’m fantasizing about someone I work with every day. But I don’t. He doesn’t even know I exist.” I decided not to tell him about the awkward introduction. “He works with Leslie most of the time.”

  “How does that make you feel?”

  I wrinkled my nose at him and snorted. “I don’t care! He’s just another one of the people who mills around the office all day.”

  “Do you imagine romantic relationships with any of the other ‘people who mill around the office all day’?”

  I blushed and crossed my arms over my chest. “No! Ick! No one else is good-looking.” Or has an English accent. Or eyes the color of Lake Michigan in winter.

  “Oh. So this is purely superficial, based solely on the guy’s looks?”

  “When you say that, it makes me sound so shallow.”

  He laughed. “Sorry. Just trying to understand your ultimate goal when it comes to this guy.”

  “Goal? I don’t have any goals.” He should know me better than that by now, I thought. “This is just another one of my fantasies. Period. And you’re kind of ruining it for me, by the way.”

  He held up a hand. “I apologize. The reason I’m pressing you so hard about this is that I don’t want you to start confusing fantasy with reality. And to warn you that you may be disappointed if you have a real romantic interest in him. He might not live up to the fantasy. That’s all.”

  It was my turn to laugh. “Are you kidding me? We’d have to talk to each other to become romantically involved. So you don’t have to worry about that.”

  I focused on a picture on one of his bookshelves. It’s a photo I often stare at during our sessions. He’s wearing a cap and gown (judging by his age in the picture, it’s his college graduation), and he’s standing next to an older, shorter version of himself (I’ve always assumed it’s his father). The picture’s so familiar to me after so many sessions that I don’t even really see it anymore. But my eyes always go there.

  “He’s kind of a hermit, anyway,” I continued, talking about Real Jude, staring at the photo. “He works late a lot. At least, I think he does. He’s always still there when I leave for the day, no matter how late it is. Not that I stay late often. Or notice his comings and goings.” I tore my eyes from the photo and impatiently said, “Can we get back to Fantasy Jude now? He’s so much more interesting.”

  “Hey, it’s your dime,” he conceded. “Dream away.”

  3

  “Your shoulders are so tight,” I say, standing behind him and rubbing them.

  “I’m really wound up at work. All I seem to do is sit hunched over that drafting table all day.”

  “I’ve noticed that. But let’s not talk about work. I know! Let’s go to a spa together this weekend and get massages!”

  “That sounds wonderful. You always have the best ideas, Libby.”

  “I have another idea.” I lean down as he looks up at me, and we kiss. He swivels
in his chair so he’s facing me. Then I slide my skirt up around my hips, straddle him, and—

  “Yello! Libby!”

  I use every ounce of equilibrium to stay in my chair as Lisa laughs at the struggle.

  “What the heck?” she asks, when I finally come to a stop with both feet on the floor. She follows my earlier line of sight straight through Jude’s office window. He’s standing at his drafting table with his back to us, his arms spread and his head hanging, his weight on one foot more than the other. Then he runs one hand through his hair and rubs his neck.

  “Oh.” After taking a minute to watch for a while, she says, “Yeah. I get it.” Then she drops a stapled sheaf of papers in my lap. “Can you pretty up this proposal by the end of the day?”

  “Sure,” I answer, moving my chair closer to my computer. I blink my eyes hard a few times and roll my head on my neck.

  As I get to work, she goes back to looking at Jude. “He has a terrific ass. Makes me wish I wasn’t married to one of the sweetest guys in the world. You know, I always thought it was nice that we worked in an office with no eye candy. No distractions. But I’m getting really used to taking in the scenery over there.”

  Clicking and typing, I say, “Yeah, Leslie’s enjoying it, too.”

  “So are you and every other person in this place who doesn’t prefer women.”

  “No, I mean, Leslie’s doing more than just looking.”

  “What a whore,” Lisa mutters supportively, patting my shoulder on her way out of my cubicle. “Just give me a shout if you need help with that. Gary wants it to go out tonight.”