Love Means Everything

by Emma Easter

“Talking about Trisha,” Audrey said and turned to Ken. “Did you know that Stan is back?”

  “What? When did he come back? I hope Trisha hasn’t let him back into her life.”

  Faizan frowned. “Who on earth is Stan?”

  “The philandering jerk Trisha was married to before she thankfully got rid of him.”

  Ken shook his head at Audrey.

  “Frank is in town now,” Audrey continued. “I hope he is able to win my sister’s heart before that Stan wins her over with his glib tongue and fake charm. She has a weakness for him, and I’m worried she will fall for his lies again.”

  “Trish is a strong woman,” Ken said. “I think she’s learned her lesson and will stay away from him. However, he does need to see his daughter.”

  Audrey looked like she was about to disagree, but she said nothing.

  Faizan smiled. “Okay, I’m off.” He walked to the door. “If I see the jerk, Stan, in Trisha’s house, I’ll make sure he knows he can’t mess with my sister.”

  “Just don’t get into a fight,” Ken said, chuckling.

  “It’s not my way anymore,” Faizan replied. He opened the door and left the house.

  As he strolled to Trisha’s, he prayed that Ken would be able to find out the information he needed from Jake and that, most of all, he would be allowed to go visit Zainah. Because he had to see her and hug her. He needed to tell her to her face again that he loved her. He also longed to hear her say once more that she loved him, even if they would never be able to explore their love for each other.

  *****

  The next day, a Saturday morning, Audrey came into Faizan’s room and told him Ken wanted to speak with him in the living room. He quickly got out of bed, pulled on his robe, and went out of the bedroom with Audrey. He went into the living room and found Ken sipping a cup of coffee in his pajamas.

  Faizan sat down and greeted him.

  Ken returned the greeting and then got straight to the point. “I’m so sorry, Faizan,” he said. “Jake and the team insist that there is no way you can leave the country. And you are not allowed to contact her by phone, either.”

  Faizan shot up from the sofa. He raked his fingers through his hair while his heart raced with anger and frustration.

  Audrey stood and took his hand. “Please sit, Faizan. Maybe we can find another solution to this.”

  “What other solution is there?” he roared, and then immediately regretted his outburst. “I’m sorry, Audrey. I didn’t mean to yell at you. I’m just so angry. I was looking forward to seeing Zainah after a year of missing her. Now, who knows when or if I will ever see her again.”

  “I’m sorry,” Ken said again.

  “It’s not your fault,” Faizan told him. He felt like weeping, but he held himself together. For now, it seemed like he wouldn’t get to see Zainah. But he would not give up. There had to be a way to contact her.

  “Maybe I should call Jake myself,” he said.

  Ken shrugged. “You could do that, but I doubt it will change anything. They were pretty adamant about you not leaving the country or contacting any of the people you knew in the past until they tell you to.”

  “So I’ll never be able to speak to Zainah, even on the phone?”

  Ken gave him a sympathetic look. “They might let you do that one day. I don’t know when, though.”

  Faizan sat down and threaded his fingers together. He sighed sadly and then nodded. “I hope they let me talk to her soon. If not, I don’t know what I will do…” He didn’t finish the sentence. For now, he had to keep his yearning for Zainah to himself and continue to pray that God would make a way for him to visit her. There was nothing in this world he wanted more than to see her face.

  *****

  Bryan stood up from his knees and paced his small office at the Bible College chapel. Since the Lord told him he was going to move to another country as a missionary, he had prayed constantly for specific leading concerning what country he and Sienna were supposed to move to. Sienna had asked him to confirm that it was truly the Lord who had spoken to him. Even though he was fairly certain it was, he had promised he would find out again, just to make sure he’d heard correctly.

  A week into his prayer, he had not only confirmed that God truly wanted them to move to another country, he had gotten the specific leading about what country they were supposed to move to. And the information he had gotten from the Lord only added to his worry. If he had been afraid to tell Sienna about God’s leading before, now he was terrified, especially knowing she was pregnant. Sienna would not take what he was going to tell her very well.

  He stopped pacing his office and gathered his things. He couldn’t postpone telling her what the Lord had said to him. He had to go home now.

  He left the Bible College and drove home. Ten minutes later, he entered the house and as usual, found Sienna in the living room waiting for him. His heart flooded with love for her and he rushed up to hug her. “How are you today?” he kissed her nose and smiled affectionately at her.

  “Much, much better now that you are back.” She kissed his lips, took his hand, and led him to the couch.

  They sat down and she snuggled up to him. “So, did the Lord speak to you today about what you are supposed to do now?” she asked, her head resting on his chest.

  He shut his eyes, dreading to confirm what he had told her days before. He opened them again as he felt her eyes on him. Without delaying any longer, he said, “The Lord spoke to me today.” He paused for a few seconds and then went on. “It’s God’s will for us to move, Sienna. He told me I would get an open door soon; a ministry opportunity in Peru. He said I was to take it when it came my way.”

  His heart pounded as Sienna sat up and stared at him. She cried, “Peru! I can’t move to Peru, Bryan! Especially now that I am pregnant. I want to raise our kids in Rosefield, the town I grew up in; where they can grow up near their aunts and cousins. I lost my parents in Rosefield, and I feel close to them whenever I am there. I moved here to Green Valley because of you and ‘cause it’s close to Rosefield. I don’t want to move to another state, not to talk of another country.” She broke down and began to cry.

  Bryan felt his heart breaking for her. Probably, her tears were caused partly by pregnancy hormones, but a huge part was that she was really distraught. He hugged her to himself and then whispered in her ear, “I think everything will be fine, Sienna. In fact, I’m sure of it. You know the Lord wouldn’t ask us to do anything he doesn’t provide an abundant amount of grace for. He has us in the palm of his hand and he loves us. You know that. It will all work out for our good in the long run, you’ll see.”

  She shook her head. “I don’t want to move to another country, Bryan.”

  He blinked. “Do you want us to disobey God?”

  She shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe we can pray and ask Him to let us stay here.”

  He stared incredulously at her. “What are you talking about, Sienna? The Lord doesn’t make mistakes. If he wants us to move, it’s because that is the best thing for us.”

  She stood. “Maybe you heard wrong.”

  “Where is all this coming from? You know I didn’t hear wrong, Sienna.”

  “You are not infallible, Bryan. It’s not completely impossible for you to make a mistake.”

  He tried to control his temper. “So you are saying I made it up? What would I possibly gain in wanting to move to another country? I don’t particularly like the idea either. My parents are here, and I know how much you love being here and in Rosefield. Why would I just want to change that? I am pretty sure I heard God’s voice.”

  She looked down at him, her eyes shimmering with tears. “And what about my classes? The Lord was the one who said I should go to Bible College. How can He just change His word? I’m just not sure that God was the one who spoke to you.”

  His mouth dropped open as he looked at her. She was insinuating that he had made everything up.

  She looked away.

  Res
entment flooded his heart and he said, “I just can’t believe we are having this fight.” They had never had this kind of argument before. In fact, they’d never fought since they’d gotten married. He sighed deeply and brushed away his resentment and anger. Rising, he put his hand on her arm. “Sienna, I don’t like this. I don’t want us fighting.”

  She turned to him and fell into his arms. “I’m sorry. It’s just that the idea of moving terrifies me. I don’t know why, since I’ve lived in New York before.”

  He held her and nodded. “I think it’s because of what you told me some time ago. When you lived in New York, you never felt at home until you moved back here. Besides, I understand why you want to raise our kids here. I do too. We have family here. If we move, we will have no support system.” He put his hand on her belly. “But that is where faith comes in, Sienna. God will provide everything we need when we obey Him. I know we will be fine.”

  She smiled up at him and nodded.

  He kissed the top of her head and then said, “Let’s go have dinner. We can whip up something together.”

  She shook her head. “No, I made beef stroganoff. We will have that.”

  “’Kay then!”

  They went to the kitchen together and as she dished out the food and he carried the plates to the dining table, he prayed silently that this issue would not cause a rift in their marriage. He loved her so much. Their little argument just now weighed heavily on him, especially as he knew this was not the end of it, especially as he didn’t even know what part of Peru they were going to move to.

  What if it’s in a part without access to basic amenities? It would be terrible, particularly because she was pregnant. He kept worrying until they sat at the table to eat. He brushed away all the troubling thoughts, as he didn’t want to think about it all right now. There was no use borrowing trouble from tomorrow. All he could do was focus on his beautiful wife and pray that God would keep his marriage intact.

  Chapter Five

  Frank left his uncompleted restaurant building after speaking with the foreman. The front of the building was almost finished, but the back was still under construction. He got into his car while making a mental note to call his business partner, Nick, and update him on the progress the builders had made. For now, he had to attend to his number one goal—winning Trisha’s heart.

  He drove to the florist near the public library and bought Trisha her favorite flowers when they were kids—pink lilies. As he drove on to her house, his emotions roiled. He was excited about seeing her again, but he was also nervous. When he’d seen her the day before, she’d seemed a little more distant than the previous day. And when Stan had knocked on the door, she had all but told him to leave. Stan might be there now and he would have to compete for her attention.

  He turned onto her street and sighed. He could see it in Stan’s eyes. Despite what he would have told Trisha about his reasons for coming back now, Stan still wanted Trisha. And if Stan was anything like he was in high school, he would not fight fair until he got her for himself.

  “Well, two can play that game,” Frank said and then shook his head. That wasn’t who he was. He liked to play fair. But still. This was his one chance to win Trisha over, or lose her to her ex. He had loved her for a lifetime. He could not afford to lose her now.

  He parked in front of Trisha’s house and for the thousandth time since he’d come to Rosefield, asked that the Lord would help him win her heart.

  But what if winning her heart isn’t God’s will for you… or her?

  His eyes widened in alarm at the clear whisper in his ears. He had never considered that. Not even when Trisha married Stan did he think that she might not be God’s will for him. He had just believed that she’d married the wrong person. And her divorce from her ex after the multiple affairs had proven him right. Or so he had thought.

  His heart thudded with fear as he exited the car. The thought of trying to forget about Trisha or trying not to love her again seemed incomprehensible to him. But if she wasn’t God’s will for him, it was exactly what he had to do. He had never bothered to ask the Lord what He wanted for him. Instead, he had held on to his dream of marrying Trisha one day. But what if that never happened? With Stan back now, and with her weakness for her ex, a devastating heartbreak seemed inevitable. Perhaps the Lord was trying to keep that from happening to him by letting him know he needed to back off now.

  Frank looked up at Trisha’s house, sighed deeply, and then gathered his thoughts together. He needed to put away all these doubts in his mind. He loved Trisha with all his heart and would do anything for her. Surely, that was a sign from God that they belonged together. Plus, Stan had been a total jerk and treated her badly. He couldn’t be God’s will for Trisha.

  He brushed away all his doubtful thoughts. He would hold on to what she had told him the day before he came to Rosefield—that she missed him and was thinking about him. He would fight for his dream and believe with all his heart that he and Trisha would be married one day, no matter what Stan’s plans were.

  He finally rang the doorbell and waited for her to come to the door. He had enjoyed playing with Ruby these last two days. He was eager to see the child again as well.

  Trisha opened the door, looking as beautiful as ever in a simple pale green dress that hugged her curves. He sucked in his breath sharply and then smiled at her. “Hi, Trish! You look perfect as always.”

  She blushed vividly and then laughed. “I’m hardly perfect, Frank… but thank you.” She let him in.

  He sat on the couch and exhaled in relief at the fact that Stan wasn’t present; at least not yet. If Stan came again while he was here, he would not leave this time; unless of course, Trish asked him to.

  She sat down next to him but shifted slightly away. He chose to ignore the action.

  “Where is Ruby?” he asked.

  “She’s asleep as always.”

  He pretended to be dismayed. “Shucks! I should have come before her nap time.”

  Trisha laughed and then her expression turned sober. “Frank, there is something I want to tell you.”

  He looked intently at her. “There is something I want to tell you, too… though you already can guess what it is.”

  “I think I can,” she said. “And that is part of what I want to talk to you about.”

  His heart jumped at the look on her face. What she wanted to tell him wasn’t going to be good, he was sure. He suddenly became desperate to speak his mind. He said quickly, “Trish, before you say what you want to, please hear me out.”

  She nodded. “Okay.”

  He searched her pretty face and his heart raced wildly. Lord, please help me. I can’t afford to fail. This is my chance to win her heart before I leave Rosefield again.

  “Trisha, you know that I have been deeply in love with you since we were teenagers. I don’t want to pressure you or anything like that, and I want to apologize beforehand if you feel in any way like I am. But can you not just give me a chance? At least I know you don’t despise me or I wouldn’t be here in your house. All I am asking for is just one chance to actually show you just how much I love you.” He tentatively took her hand. “Please, Trisha.”

  She pressed her lips together. She didn’t speak for a long time, and his heart kept skipping in fear and anticipation as he waited for her to say something.

  At last, she looked into his eyes and said, “Will you just give me a day or so to think about it?”

  A small thread of disappointment went through him, but he nodded. Be patient, man, he chided himself. At least what she had said was better than an outright rejection. He smiled at her. “I have waited for years. What is another day or two?”

  She looked away and he sighed ruefully. He was pressuring her.

  “I’m sorry, Trisha. I shouldn’t have brought that up.”

  “No need to apologize,” she murmured. She stood up. “Well… let me go get Ruby. It’s time for lunch.” She looked down at him before she left the l
iving room. “Will you join us, Frank?”

  He nodded eagerly. “I’d love that.”

  She left and he exhaled. He needed to be patient, but he couldn’t help the desperate thoughts running through his mind. Somehow, he knew without a doubt that her answer to his request would be final, and that no matter what he did, he would not be able to change it. That made him incredibly nervous. He was on the brink of finally getting a chance with the only girl he had ever loved, or forever losing the chance to be with her.

  *****

  The stars were shining brightly when Zainah got into the back of the truck and Leila got in beside her. The driver had already put their bags into the trunk of the car. She said to the driver, “Please hurry. We have to leave before Miriam comes out of her tent and sees us.”

  The driver nodded and started the car.

  Zainah kept looking back, her heart beating in fear, as the truck sped away. She did not relax until they were far away from the camp. She turned to Leila and said, “Thank God we are out of there.”

  Leila smiled and replied, “We are going to have such an adventure!”

  Zainah didn't speak, but Leila chattered on. She half-listened to Leila while wondering and silently praying about what their next move would be. After a while, she fell asleep and dreamt that she was with Faizan. She woke with a start when she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned and saw it was Leila.

  Leila said in a shaky voice, “The driver wants us to get off here.”

  Zainah looked all around her, and her eyes widened in alarm. It was nighttime but they were in the middle of a well-lit, busy market. The place was noisy and droves of people walked by the car. She leaned forward and said to the driver, “Where are we?”

  The man turned and answered abruptly, “We are in Blima. You need to get out.”

  Zainah’s heart drummed. “I thought the agreement was to take us to a house in town.”

  The man frowned deeply and said, “Amira told me no such thing. All she said was to pick you up from the camp and take you to town. This market is where your leader, Miriam, stops when I pick her up, and so this is where I have brought you. You have to find your way from here.”