Eclipsed

by Kathryn Hoff

  When my sandwich was gone, I dragged my butt up to the third floor.

  There I almost ran into creepy Tilly, coming out of Reyna’s bedroom with an armload of bedsheets.

  “Shameful,” she said.

  Oh, ho, I thought. Dirty pictures in Reyna’s room? Or just shamefully messy? Once Tilly was gone, I was curious enough to peek in to see what Tilly was bent out of shape over.

  Reyna’s room was neat as a pin, no dirty pictures in sight. There were lots of other pictures, though. Her room was fairyland, with drawings of pixies and elves and flowers all over the walls and angels hovering over the pink-sheeted crib. Very impressive, even if it wasn’t the sort of decoration I wanted to sleep with.

  The homey touches didn’t stop there. Her bed wasn’t topped with some random blanket scavenged from a dead family, she had a pretty quilt, clearly handmade, with patchwork squares in pink, orange, and yellow. The quilt was topped with two frilly pink throw pillows and a teddy bear in a Deedee-sized dress. She even had a shaggy pink rug on the floor.

  It was all the sort of thing any girl might have—if she wasn’t an orphan. The kind of thing I’d once had.

  But Reyna had more. There were dolls, lots of them, arranged on shelves. Beautiful dolls, each over a foot tall, the kind meant for display and not to play with.

  Each one wore an intricate costume topped with an elaborate hairdo or hat. One doll had a glimmering blue ballgown that would have made Cinderella swoon with envy; another was a bride in white lace and a veil. A dark-haired princess in black Spanish lace stood next to a doll in a slinky sari in golden silk. A charming kimono, an elegant work suit, a pretty party frock, a sexy sun dress—there was even a Jacqueline Kennedy doll wearing the famous pink skirt-and-jacket.

  Hell, I thought it was shameful too.

  Orphans have nothing. That was the deal—if the adults in a family were Eclipsed, the orphan homes would take care of the kids while the ECA took all of the family’s property to use or sell.

  I’d thought I was privileged, to have a stuffed orang and three books of my own. How had Reyna managed to keep all this?

  “Get out.”

  Reyna was right behind me.

  “How?” I demanded. “How do you have all this stuff?”

  Her face was stiff, her fists clenched. “Get. Out. Of. My. Room.”

  I retreated, fuming.

  In the nursery, Chubb was wiping Gabe’s hands and face while Deedee practiced standing in the playpen. “About time you showed up,” he said.

  “Have you seen Reyna’s room?” I asked. “Have you seen all the fancy dolls and stuff she has?”

  “Leave it alone, Kennedy.” He released Gabe to go cruising around on all fours.

  Reyna followed me in. “You stay out of my room!”

  “Why? You afraid I’ll play with your dollies?”

  “Just stay out, is all.”

  “Why do you have it all? How’d you get to keep it?”

  She stood stiffly, arms folded. “That’s none of your business.”

  In the playpen, Deedee fussed and raised her hands to be picked up.

  Chubb said again, “Leave it, Kennedy.”

  It wasn’t fair! The day the white suits dragged me from my home, I would have done anything to bring with me one toy, one tiny bit of comfort. But Reyna had everything a girl could want, everything that reminded her of home and family.

  Reyna raised her voice to be heard over Gabe’s happy shouts and Deedee’s whines. “Rico says Molly smeared your face in shit. Serves you right.”

  “Rico’s full of it. A little on my jumpsuit is all.”

  Gabe found a plastic bat and began to pound the floor gleefully. Whap, whap. Deedee began to wail in earnest and Chubb put her on the floor with Gabe. Immediately, she began to work her way to him, half-crawling, half inching along like a caterpillar.

  Hands clenched, chin thrust forward, Reyna ignored the babies to concentrate on me. “Rico says you’re useless, you can’t handle the job. He says you’ll be out on your ass and back in teen home in a week.”

  I felt my face flush, all my anger welling up. Anger at having to leave my comfortable home with Paula, anger at Paula for fitting in so easily here, anger at having to babysit, anger at Rico for spreading gossip about me, anger at Reyna for having more than any orphan should.

  “Rico’s full of crap. He’s just jealous because I have Paula and he never got fostered.”

  Which was the wrong thing to say, especially to two orphans who’d never had a foster home. Foolish, witless, and boneheaded.

  Chubb bristled. “That was mean, Kennedy. Just because you got fostered doesn’t make you special.” He removed the bat and gave Gabe a soft toy to pound.

  “Not special like Reyna, with all her dolls and stuff?”

  Reyna brought her fists to her hips like an angry schoolmarm, her bright earrings jangling. “What part of ‘none of your damn business’ don’t you understand? As for your precious Paula, don’t count on her being here too long. I heard her arguing with Mendez, and he was pissed as hell. She’s stupid—he’s the head scientist. He can fire her like that.” She snapped her fingers.

  Insulting me was one thing, but I was damned if I’d let anybody tear down Paula. I stamped a foot. “Paula’s not stupid! She’s smarter than any of the rest of them. And a hell of a lot nicer than you or anyone else here.”

  Gabe, slinging the toy, caught Deedee on the upswing. Deedee, startled and insulted, began to whimper.

  “Now you’ve done it!” Chubb snapped. “Both of you stop this right now.”

  Reyna was still on her rant. “She’s stupid if she argues with Mendez. She’s gonna get fired and both of you’ll be out of a job.”

  “I hope she does!” I shouted. “I never wanted to come here anyway and neither did Paula. I hate this place!”

  “Shut up!” Chubb hissed. “You’re upsetting the kids.”

  Both babies were making uh uh uh sounds, working up to a serious cry.

  “Chubb! Settle that boy down.” Reyna snatched the toy from Gabe and threw it out of his reach.

  Gabe screamed for his stolen toy. Deedee spit up and started to wail.

  “Now look what you’ve done.” Reyna glared at me and scooped up Deedee.

  “What I’ve done? To hell with this.” And even though I’d promised to babysit the kids, I stomped out.

  Which was a very, very stupid thing to do.

  As soon as I left the nursery, I knew I’d made a mistake, but it was too late then—I was gonna blubber. My room? Too close to the nursery. The primate lab? Too close to Paula. I ran to the stairway at the far end of the hall, sat on a step halfway down, and let go. My nose ran and my eyes swelled up and overflowed. I put my face in my arms and heaved sobs, trying to keep the noise down.

  I hate it here. I want to go home, to Paula’s place, and see Henry again and work at the zoo.

  Foolish. As long as I was wishing, why not wish to have real parents again, or a real home? Or that there was no such thing as Eclipse? Or that I lived in a palace, and not a run-down old school? Why not wish for pets of my own? A dog like Barney. A kitten. A horse.

  Hell, why not a unicorn?

  By the time I got to the unicorn, I was out of sobs and down to snuffles.

  Suck it up, Jackie. Wishing for impossible stuff wouldn’t get me anything.

  I’d totally forgotten my basic primate behavior. I’d stood up when I should have backed down. I’d confronted when I should have deflected. Reyna had a hot button, and I’d pushed it. And she’d pushed my own hot button, and I’d ended up doing something witless.

  Damn my stupid temper.

  I didn’t feel like facing Chubb and Reyna again, so after washing my face, I went downstairs to the primate lab. Maybe an extra training session would be an excuse for walking out on nursery duty. I told myself I’d make it up to them tomorrow.

  Eeeek! Woof!

  I heard Molly screeching and Barney barking even before I o
pened the door.

  Bert stood in front of the cage, poking a broom handle through the bars at Molly. Molly bounced around the cage screaming, mouth wide open and lips drawn back to display her worn, yellow teeth. Poor old, caged, helpless Molly being abused by a grown man.

  “Stop it!” I yelled.

  Maybe I was just a kid, but I was hunky and strong. I pulled the broom away from Bert. I was so mad I was shaking.

  “How would you like it?” I hit the bastard with the broom handle.

  Molly screamed, eek eek eek, like she was happy to see me give it to him.

  Bert backed up and held his hands over his face. “She threw shit at me!”

  “So what?” I hit him once more for good measure.

  “What’s going on here?”

  Quinn and Westerly stood at the door, Rico peeking in from behind.

  CHAPTER 12

  On thin ice

  In Westerly’s office, I tried to make myself look small and submissive, remembering—a little late—proper primate behavior.

  My stupid temper. Just when I needed to make a good impression, when I wanted to show Mendez and Westerly I was smart enough to help in the lab, I’d screwed up, bad. Forget lab work, Paula was probably regretting she’d ever met me.

  She braced me with a hand on my shoulder. Westerly stood behind her desk, as imposing as an elephant, while Quinn prowled like a really tall panther waiting for an opening.

  Quinn said, for like the fourth time, “Bert was simply trying to get a blood sample, which is his job.”

  Westerly rumbled, “It is not his job to abuse the laboratory specimen.”

  Quinn waved it away. “Even so, I will not allow a member of my staff to be beaten by some ill-mannered delinquent with delusions of competency.”

  “Enough, Avery,” Westerly snapped. “There was provocation on both sides. The child will be disciplined, as will Mr. Rasmussen.”

  Quinn stopped. “Oh, no! We can do without another underage troublemaker, but I cannot do without a lab tech. I need Bert. Besides, in his case, there are mitigating circumstances.”

  Westerly nodded. “Mm. I agree, Bert and Tilly’s recent loss has clearly had a destabilizing effect on their lives. Some leeway is appropriate, but I draw the line at destruction of laboratory property.” She tapped her fingers together. “Mandatory counseling. Tilly is already participating; Bert must join her.”

  “Fine,” Quinn snapped. “But what about her?”

  “As for Jacqueline—” Westerly stared down at me.

  “I’m sorry,” I said again. “I, uh, overreacted.” Please don’t send me back to teen home.

  “If I can make a suggestion,” Paula said. “Bert is understandably overwrought, and Avery is quite right that Bert’s help in the phage lab is valuable. I suggest Bert be relieved of all duties relating to Molly and the dog, and Jackie be required to take on any resulting additional work. Jackie will take the dog to the run before breakfast in the morning, feed him, and bring him back before lunch. She will clean Molly’s cage and keep the primate lab clean. All that, in addition to training sessions with Molly and assisting in controlling Molly for any blood draws or other medical procedures.”

  Westerly gave me a cobra stare. “And is Jacqueline willing to take on those responsibilities?”

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  “And relieve the other interns by watching the infants for two hours a day?”

  Crap. “Yes, ma’am.” Paula patted my shoulder.

  “Avery?”

  “Humph. Fine. Until she screws up again.”

  “Very well. And, young lady, you are skating on thin ice. Our work is too important to be disrupted by juvenile overreaction.”

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  “You may go, then. Paula, if you would remain a moment?”

  Paula murmured to me, “My room.”

  Quinn headed straight for the stairway back to the phage lab. I turned down the hall a few steps, but then tiptoed back to listen outside Westerly’s door.

  Westerly’s voice was a deep rumble. “Whatever were you thinking, to take in a child like that?”

  “Oh, my God!” Paula sounded like she’d just had a hard day with the orangutans. “I thought fostering Jackie would be easy, like having a little sister. She’s nearly grown, clever, and independent. I had no idea it would be so draining.”

  “Humph. You should have known better. There’s a reason I’ve never created a family. Children are a drain, one that never ends, no matter how old or clever they are. It’s clear you’re fond of the child, Paula, but this cannot happen again. We’ve had enough upset. We cannot afford to have another disruptive influence.”

  “I understand. I’ll talk to her.”

  I slunk up the stairs to wait for Paula.

  Why did Paula choose me?

  When I met Paula, I was fourteen. I’d been an orphan for four years and I’d lost any hope of being fostered. I was chubby and gawky and had a record for fighting. I didn’t care about anything and said so, frequently.

  One day the proctor called me to the reception room where prospective fosterers met kids who might be a match. I wasn’t excited—I’d been there many times before, usually with some girl who was younger and cuter. I’d figured out that the proctor sent me in to make that other kid look good.

  But this time there was no other kid.

  “I’m Paula Bardo,” she’d said. “Your profile says you’re good at science and you like animals.” She was tall and busty, wearing jeans—not the fashionable kind—a flannel shirt and no jewelry or makeup or nail polish. Maybe around thirty. Her hair framed her face in a black cloud of curls. Her hands were rough with callouses.

  I shrugged. “Sure, I guess.” I didn’t get my hopes up. I still had a trace of black eye from the week before, when I’d rescued some little sniveler from a bully who’d tried to take her lunch.

  “Enough to help take care of them, clean up after them?”

  Great. She needs me to clean her kennels. Still, it would be better than teen home. “Yeah, I guess.”

  “Even when they’re not cute or cuddly?”

  “What, you got snakes or something?”

  She watched me closely. “Something.”

  I shrugged. “I don’t care.”

  She’d watched me for a few seconds, and then asked, “Do you have any questions for me?”

  No one had asked me that before. “You married? You got other kids?”

  “No and no.”

  “You gay?” You heard things about fosterers sometimes.

  “No.”

  “You live in a house?”

  “An apartment. There’s a corner with a daybed. You can have that. I’ll put up a bookcase to give you some privacy.”

  It sounded a lot better than teen home, but at least at teen home I knew what I had to deal with. With a foster mother, who knew what she’d be like? Who knew what she’d want from me? I wasn’t anybody’s idea of a sweet little girl.

  She must have seen the hesitation in my face, because she said, “Look, I’m not expecting anything. Do your schoolwork and your share of the housework and I’ll leave you alone, if that’s what you want. I won’t try to make you into someone you’re not, and I won’t lie to you.”

  She didn’t look like a hugger, or a gusher, or someone who’d make you pray morning, noon, and night whether you believed in it or not, or someone who wanted a child as a pet like so many fosterers seemed to want.

  “Do I have to sleep with the snakes?” I asked.

  She smiled and said, “No.”

  “All right,” I’d said. “I can live with that.”

  When Paula got to her room, I was nestled in her beat-up easy chair, feeling as low as a worm. This time, she didn’t greet me with a comforting hug. Instead, she ran her hands through her hair. “Are you out of your mind?”

  “The stupid jerk was hurting Molly!”

  Paula stopped and raised her eyebrows at me. I’d called Bert stupid,
out loud. There went my five bucks.

  Paula tsked. “Bert’s actions are not the point. June believed you about Bert teasing Molly—there have been problems with him before. It’s your actions I’m worried about. You weren’t where you were supposed to be. You walked out on your promise to help Reyna and Chubb. You’ve made a terrible first impression on the people who run this place. You’ve pissed off everyone who’s close to your age. And you’re making me spend time dealing with your mess when I should be working.”

  “I hate it here.”

  She stopped pacing and faced me. “You know what the alternative is, don’t you?”

  I looked at the floor. “Teen home.”

  Then she let me have it. “I’m disappointed in you, Jackie. I thought you understood—the work here is important, important enough for you and me to make sacrifices. I expected better from you.”

  Every word was a knife in my chest. I could hardly breathe. I sniffed, trying hard to hold back tears. My stupid temper. I’d had an opportunity for a fresh start in a new place, and already I’d torpedoed my chances.

  Paula sat on the chair arm and put her hand on my shoulder. “We can’t go back, Jackie. This is where we work now. This is where we live. I went out on a limb to make sure you could be here with me, but if you cause problems, you won’t be able to stay. Understand?”

  I nodded, miserable. “What should I do?”

  “Right now, the people here are wondering if you’re responsible enough to be trusted with Molly or the children. What do you think you should do?”

  I knew the answer to that. “Apologize, shut up, and do my job.”

  She grinned. “Damn straight. I suggest a penitent attitude toward Bert, even though he was in the wrong. As for making up with Chubb and Reyna, that’s on you.”

  She hugged me. “I know it’s hard to make friends. You try so hard not to need anybody. Keep in mind that sometimes, if you want to make a friend, you have to be willing to ask for help.”