by Holly Jaymes
“You were born first because you took cuts getting out of the womb.”
I laughed. “You always did like to be first, Park.”
He nodded in agreement. “Yeah, I did.” He looked at Hope. “Walk me out?”
I took that to mean he wanted some alone time with her. “If you need a minute, I’ll go inside and work on the dishes.”
“Don’t do them all,” Hope said. “I’ll help in a minute.”
I gathered up the dishes and utensils and headed into the kitchen. I glanced out the window to see Hope and Parker talking. I could hear their voices but not make out what they were saying. I turned on the water to drown out their voices as I put the lunch dishes in the dishwasher.
When I was done, I turned off the water.
Duke was at my side. “Want a treat?” His tail wagged. I moved to the cupboard with the treats alongside the sink nearer the back door.
“Did you get stranded on purpose? You’re not here trying to get money from him for dad, are you?”
I stopped short at Parker’s words.
“You think I’d do that?” Hope sounded indignant.
“I think mom would ask you to. It’s quite a coincidence that after all this time, you end up here. You couldn’t even stand to hear me talk about Mitch, and now you’re living in his house? You don’t even like the outdoors, Hope.”
I knew I needed to close the window or go in the other room, but I was bolted to where I was. Had Hope arranged all this? For what purpose? To help her dad? Her business?
Duke barked, reminding me of what I was supposed to be doing. I got the treat and gave it to him, my mind reeling.
But as I filtered through Hope’s and my situation, I couldn’t believe she orchestrated it. How would she have known I was passing by to find her stranded? Her car really had mechanical problems. I’d offered to help her father and her business, the former she refused and the latter, she accepted. But the business help was mostly information and support. She hadn’t asked for money or even tech help. I’d supplied that because I wanted to.
“I’m being an idiot,” I said to Duke.
As I went into the living area, Hope and Parker were making their way to the front door.
“Thanks again, Mitch.” Parker gave me a hug.
“Of course. Anytime.”
Hope walked him to his car, while I went to change my clothes, deciding I needed to take a run. While I was pretty sure Hope wasn’t trying to take advantage of me, my guilt over sleeping with her had grown.
When I came back out, Hope was in the living room lost in thought.
“Everything okay with Parker?” I asked.
“Yeah. He’s just a worrywart.” She looked at me, and her eyes narrowed. “What about you? You look like you’ve got the weight of the world on your shoulders.”
I shook my head. “Just the guilt over lying to my friend.”
Annoyance flashed in her eyes. “He doesn’t suspect anything. At least not between us.”
“He thanked me for looking out for you.”
“Yeah, so?”
“He’s thanking me for doing his job. A brother’s job. He sees me as a surrogate brother to you. Siblings don’t fuck, Hope.” My tone got harsher than I’d have liked, but that’s what could happen when strong feelings built up.
She laughed derisively. “Then stop fucking me.” She shook her head. “I’m not a child. I’m the same age as both of you, and yet you two treat me like I can’t make my own decisions. Parker doesn’t have a say in who I sleep with.”
“This isn’t about your choice, it’s about mine, and the one I made to betray my friend.” My gut burned with the guilt.
“So stop. I’ll move back to the extension. Or better yet, I’ll go see if there’s room at the lodge yet.”
I wouldn’t say I felt panic, but I did have an overwhelming concern about her leaving. I let out a breath. “I don’t want you to go. I just feel guilty, Hope. Surely you can understand that.”
Her anger dissipated slightly. “Yes, of course. But we’re all adults here. And for the record, I have no problem telling him even though he may be angry at me too for sleeping with his friend.” She looked down. “He’ll probably think I was trying to get something from you.”
“What?”
“Nothing. The point is, if you want this to stop, it can.”
I tried not to be too bothered by how easily she seemed to be able to end our little affair. “I don’t want to stop, Hope. I just don’t want to feel guilty.”
She shrugged. “I don’t think I can help you with that.” She moved to me, close enough so I could inhale her sweet scent. “I admire your loyalty to Parker. I really do. But you deserve to enjoy life. Do you enjoy being with me?”
“You know I do,” I said, putting my hands on her waist and pulling her to me. The truth was, I hadn’t enjoyed life so much since I’d moved to the mountains. She’d brought new life into my home.
“I know Parker wants you to be happy too. He worries about you out here all alone. I told him you’ve made friends and keep busy with all sorts of activities and volunteer work, but he doesn’t like that you’re alone.”
“I like being alone.” At least I thought I did. With Hope around, it was hard to be sure anymore.
“The point is, I think he’d be glad that you weren’t alone.”
“If it wasn’t you.”
“We don’t know that, Mitch. He could be thrilled that his favorite sister and friend were enjoying each other’s company.”
I shook my head. “He’d get a picture of me touching you naked, and it would cause him to want to beat the shit out of me.”
She laughed. “Maybe. At first. But then he’d be happy that we were happy. Of course, he never has to know either.”
I nodded. “I would prefer that.”
“Then it’s settled.”
I wasn’t sure what was settled, but I knew I couldn’t stop being with her for the time she was here, so I’d have to live with the guilt.
“By the way, now that I’ve endured a lunch with your brother pretending I haven’t seen you naked, I need to ask you to come to my family dinner tomorrow night and pretend the same.”
She quirked a brow. “Why?”
“Because my mother told me to invite you.”
“So, you don’t want me to come, but your mother does?”
I pulled her in closer. “I’d like you to come. I just worry that people will be able to tell what’s going on between us.”
She looked down, and I got the feeling that I hurt her.
“We both just agreed that this was a short-term deal between you and me. No one else needs to know,” I elaborated.
She mustered a smile. “Yes, of course. I’d enjoy seeing your family.”
I kissed her because I felt like I needed the contact to mend whatever tenuous thread was starting to fray between us.
When I pulled back, I still felt like I saw a wedge between us.
“I’m going to put in some more work. I’m finishing up the paperwork to form my business,” she said.
“I’m going to take a run.”
I watched as she made her way back up the stairs to the studio, kicking myself for mishandling things again. I had to hope that with a little time engaging in our own endeavors, that we could put this little kerfuffle behind us and enjoy the next two weeks we had together.
Book 3: Chapter 11—Helplessly Falling
Helplessly Falling
Hope
I watched from the upstairs window as Mitch headed out the back of the house toward the trail. He stretched, showing off the sculpted muscles of his strong back. Mitch had a perfect body. He also had such a good and loyal heart. I wished I could ease around his thoughts about betraying Parker. I hated that he felt so much guilt about being with me. To be honest, I hated that if push came to shove, he’d probably choose Parker’s friendship over me. That truth made the fact that I was falling for him all the more difficult.
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Then there was my brother accusing me of trying to worm my way into Mitch’s life to help my dad or myself. I was offended that he felt I was capable of such a thing. Yes, mom had asked me if Mitch could help, but I didn’t make the request. And I wasn’t in the mountains to see Mitch much less get myself stranded and saved by him. I was here to jump-start my own life and career.
Why were two of the men I cared for the most so difficult? Why couldn’t they see me and accept me for who I was?
I shook my head and pulled out the pattern for a dress I’d cut earlier to sew. There was no sense in ruminating over Mitch and Parker. Mitch’s guilt would be absolved in two weeks when I left, sooner if he decided, as it had nine years ago. My heart squeezed at that thought. The truth was, I would have enjoyed continuing to see him. But he was clear that he wouldn’t allow himself to be in a long-term committed relationship again, thanks to Gwen.
I stayed up in the studio, sewing the dress, and then pinning and cutting other patterns I’d created for more outdoor wear I designed. Then I finished the paperwork to officially form my business and submitted it online to the Virginia corporation commission.
When I finally came up for air, it was dark out. I looked at my watch, and it was nearly seven. Had Mitch let me work through dinner again?
I went downstairs. The area was dark except for the flicker of candles and a fire in the hearth. Mitch sat in front of it, his gaze lost in the flames. When I hit the bottom step, his head turned, and he smiled. My heart rolled in my chest, making that final fall into love. Dammit.
“I thought we could have a picnic dinner here. I even brought s’mores.” He held out a hand to show the food on the table. Then he stood, drawing me to him and helping me get down on the floor next to him.
It seemed like he wanted to recreate the first night we slept together. Perhaps he wanted to reconnect, and recreating a night in which we’d connected very well was an excellent way to do it.
“It’s lovely, Mitch.” I straddled his thighs, loving the way his dark eyes flashed with fire as I cradled my cleft over his dick. “But first, dessert.”
By the next morning, things between Mitch and I seemed to be back to where they’d been before Parker had come for lunch. The only problem I had was the certainty that I loved Mitch, and acceptance that in two weeks, my heart would be broken. I pushed that bit aside and decided to focus on the time I had with him, and the excitement at how close I was getting to starting my business.
The drive to his mother’s house was beautiful until we hit civilization. The noise and traffic were glaring after two weeks in the mountains.
“It’s like getting hit by a two-by-four, isn’t it?” Mitch said as he stopped for yet another stoplight.
“It is a shock to the senses,” I agreed.
A few minutes later, he pulled up in front of a traditional brick rancher and parked behind an SUV.
“Gabe and Sam are here already. He’s always on time now that he has her to keep him in line.”
I smiled. “Behind every great man is a woman who gets him to where he needs to go.”
He grinned. “That about sums it up. You ready?”
Mitch seemed more worried about this visit than I did. I wasn’t sure his family would care if they found out what he and I were doing nestled in his wooded home. But I supposed he was concerned it would get back to Parker.
“Ready,” I responded.
He led me up to the walkway and into the front door with Duke following. He’d clearly been here before as he quickly rushed off once the door opened.
“He’s here to see his buddy, George. Mom’s dog,” Mitch said.
“Oh good, Mitch, you brought Hope. It’s so good to see you,” Mitch’s mother greeted me with a hug. “It’s been too long.”
“Hello Mrs. Sloane, thank you for having me.”
“You know we just want an insider view into what a retired recluse does all damn day in the woods. We’re hoping you’ll be able to report on it,” Gabe said as he joined his mother. His tattooed arms were holding a baby, and I had a flash of what Mitch would look like holding an infant.
“Enjoying the quiet, Gabe. Something you don’t know about anymore,” Mitch said, giving his brother a side hug and then sweetly kissing the baby on the forehead. My heart completely melted at the sight.
“Your daddy is a nuisance. You’re a sweet girl to put up with him,” Mitch said to the baby.
“How about me?” a woman said, joining us.
“You too, Sam. Why you put up with this moron, I’ll never know,” Mitch said, giving her a hug.
Gabe waggled his brows. “I’m handy around the house. Hope do you remember Sam? I think maybe you met before, a long time ago.”
“It was a long time. How are you, Sam?”
“Glad to have another woman in the house. Pretty soon, we’ll outnumber the boys.”
“Don’t tell Will that,” Gabe muttered.
“Come out back.” Mitch’s mother waved us through the kitchen and out to a back deck.
“A pool?” I asked. “That wasn’t here before was it?”
“No. Mom got jealous of Hallie’s folks, and so I had to put one in,” Gabe said.
“Who’s jealous of Hallie’s folks?”
I turned to see another Sloane brother coming out onto the deck.
He saw me and grinned. “Hope.” He cast a glance to Mitch and did a little eye waggle. Perhaps Mitch did have something to worry about in terms of his family catching on. “It’s good to see you. How’s Parker?”
“He’s good,” I said, giving Nate a hug.
“This is my wife, Hallie. Hal this is Hope, a longtime friend of Mitch’s.”
“Actually, he’s my brother’s friend, but they let me tag along sometimes.”
“Tagging along, is that what you’re doing up in the mountains with Mitch?”
Mitch tensed.
“Nate,” Hallie’s voice was chastising. “Hi, Hope. It’s good to meet you. Don’t mind him. Or any of them. They revert to thirteen-year-old boys when they’re together.”
Nate grinned at his wife. It was so obvious that he loved her and that Gabe loved Sam. Envy filled me that I couldn’t have that. At least not with Mitch.
“If you’re thirteen, I’m fifteen,” the final brother, Will, said appearing behind Nate.
Nate moved out of the way so Will could come out the door. “You’re the most immature of us all.”
“I’m still older,” Will grinned. “Hope, how are you? You keeping my brother from turning feral out there in the woods.”
“Will, how are you?”
The evening progressed in much the same manner. The brothers enjoyed teasing each other, but I could see the love and respect between them. And they all doted on their mother. The absence of their father was keenly felt. I’d remembered him as being a lot like his sons; often joking and teasing, but desperately in love with his family. It was sad that he wasn’t there to see his sons’ successes in their careers, and in the case of Gabe and Nate, in their personal lives.
We ate dinner on the deck, and it was lovely to be a part of a family gathering. My parents were so stressed over the last six months that we hadn’t had a family dinner in forever it seemed. I’d need to remedy that when I returned home.
“You doing okay?” Mitch leaned over and whispered. “I probably should have warned you that none of my brothers has fully grown up.”
I turned my head, putting my face close to his. He was so handsome, and I wanted more than anything to lean in the few inches to kiss him.
“I’m enjoying this very much, Mitch. Thank you.”
He tilted his head. “You sure you’re okay?”
I nodded. “It just makes me realize that my family hasn’t done anything like this in a long time. It’s wonderful that you do it each week.”
Emotion moved over his face. “I just wish my father was here.”
“I do too. I was thinking that his absence was noticeable. I r
emember how he was always the life of the party.”
Mitch’s forehead leaned into mine, closing his eyes as if what I said moved him in some way.
“Listen up, everyone,” Nate bellowed across the table. Mitch jerked back and into attention.
“Ah Nate, you ruined a moment between Mitch and Hope over there,” Will said.
I swallowed, feeling uncomfortable for Mitch. “Indigestion,” I said, trying to do as the brothers would and make light of it.
Everyone laughed, and Mitch’s hand squeezed my thigh under the table, in what I think meant, thank you. But as I looked at his brothers and their wives, and his mother, I could see speculation about us in the way they looked at us.
“My moment is better than his. Sorry Mitch,” Nate said.
Mitch waved Nate’s apology away. “I’m sure whatever cure you’ve come up with will outdo anything I could do.”
“This is more of a personal nature,” Nate said, looking at Hallie sitting next to him. God, if a man ever looked at me like that, I’d do whatever he asked.
The other women of the table sucked in a breath.
“Well spit it out, Nate. I’m an old woman,” his mother said.
“Hallie and I are having a baby.”
The entire table erupted in whoops and congratulations. I joined in, but inside my heart ached for what they had. For what I wanted with Mitch.
I turned to him and saw genuine love and happiness for his brother, and perhaps a little envy as well. Had things gone differently, Gwen would be sitting where I was. Would they be announcing their pregnancy too?
“It better be a boy,” Will said. “There are too many girls at this party.”
“Boo,” the ladies said.
Will grinned. “Pretty soon, I’ll be the only single guy left.” He glanced at Mitch, who tensed next to me. It hurt my heart that he couldn’t allow himself to love again.
Several people were looking at Mitch, and I realized, they were waiting to see if he was going to respond either in the affirmative or not.
I turned to Mitch. “Are you leaving? Why is Will the only single guy left?”
Gratitude laced Mitch’s eyes. “Will can’t count.”
