Breathless

by HELEN HARDT

  That Henry resulted was a true gift, but the actual act that made him hadn’t meant a thing to me. No regrets. None at all. I loved my son deeply. But being a solo parent to an infant didn’t leave much time for dating or sex, especially when I was also dealing with the truth about my father.

  That one-night fuck had enriched me in so many ways, yet, at its base, it was still that—a one-night fuck.

  As this would be.

  I couldn’t offer more, no matter how much I wanted it. No matter how much she wanted it.

  The only problem was…in my heart I ached to offer Marjorie more.

  So much to think about. So much…

  Within a few seconds more, though, all thoughts turned into fragments, leaving me only with feeling. Pure, raw feeling.

  Intense feeling, intense desire. Had I ever wanted a woman as much? Ever?

  Not that I could recall.

  Our chests were fused together, as were our mouths. Her tongue was velvety against my own, her lips soft yet demanding.

  She left me breathless.

  So breathless that I had to forcefully end the kiss to inhale deeply.

  I pulled away, my dick throbbing in my jeans. She gazed at me, her dark-chocolate eyes heavy-lidded. Her cheeks were rosy, and her lips red and swollen from our kiss. And God, her breasts… Perfect in every way. Round and pert and just the right size. Nipples like hard brown berries. Marjorie was long and lean, and her waist indented slightly, leading to narrow hips and long legs still clad in skinny jeans.

  I’d seen her in a bikini. I knew what lay under all that denim. Didn’t stop me from wanting to rip it off her and ogle that Victoria’s Secret body.

  “Why did you stop?” She touched her lips lightly.

  I needed to catch a breath didn’t seem like the right thing to say.

  “I needed to catch my breath.” I said it anyway.

  One side of her mouth curled upward into a half smile. “Oh.” Then she stalked toward me.

  I held up a hand. “Wait.”

  “Are you kidding? Do we have to go through this again?” She spun around. “Look. No unicorns. This is a woman’s bedroom. Not a little girl’s.”

  “Talon is home.”

  “So? He won’t barge into my bedroom. He respects my privacy.”

  “Shouldn’t you…check on Jade? The boys?”

  “You said it yourself. Talon is home. I’m here for them during the day, when Talon is working. He’s home now. Jade is his wife. The boys are his children. He likes looking after them.” She cupped her breasts and held them out to me, as if in offering.

  I nearly exploded inside my jeans.

  “What’s going to happen when Talon sees my car still outside? Won’t he wonder where the hell I am? And then he’ll see your door closed…”

  She huffed and grabbed her T-shirt, pulling it over her head sans bra. “You know what? Just go, Bryce. Get the hell out of here.”

  Finally, someone was talking sense. The problem? I didn’t want to go. I didn’t want to go at all.

  But I would. Because it was the right thing to do. Because I couldn’t offer her what she deserved. I quickly buttoned up my shirt, barely making eye contact with Marjorie.

  And I walked out.

  Chapter Seven

  Marjorie

  He left.

  He left, leaving me hornier than I’d ever been. I was so wet, so ripe, so freaking ready.

  I relocked my door and shed my flip-flops, jeans, and undies. Then I lay down on my bed and spread my legs.

  I rarely resorted to masturbation, but I was so turned on. And so angry.

  It didn’t take long.

  The next morning, after feeding the boys their breakfast and taking them to school, I sat in Talon and Jade’s bedroom, visiting with my best friend.

  “And don’t tell me he’s too old for me,” I said after spilling my guts about Bryce. “You’re my age, and he’s only three years older than Talon.”

  Jade had gotten up and showered but still wore her bathrobe and slippers. “I’d never tell you that, Marj.”

  “He’s attracted to me. He admits it.”

  “Of course he is. Who wouldn’t be? That’s obviously not the issue.”

  “He says it’s my brothers, but I’m not buying.”

  “They are very protective of you.”

  “He also says it’s my age. He remembers when my room was decorated with pink and yellow unicorns.”

  “Unicorns?” Jade laughed. “Really, Marj?”

  Jade and I hadn’t met until college, so she hadn’t been privy to my childhood décor. “What was your room decorated like when you were a kid?”

  “Well, four walls and the basics. A dresser, a bed, and a desk from the Salvation Army. The occasional poster I found at a garage sale.”

  I shook my head. “I’m sorry, Jade.”

  “Don’t be.”

  My heart twisted. Despite being the daughter of supermodel Brooke Bailey, Jade and her father had lived a modest life on his construction salary after Brooke had abandoned them. Brooke, who’d been in a terrible automobile accident several months ago, now lived in a Snow Creek townhome subsidized by Talon and Jade. Brooke and Jade had seemingly made peace, despite Brooke’s abandonment of her daughter as a child.

  “Just sock me in the mouth when I start playing the ‘poor little rich girl,’ okay? Promise?”

  Jade laughed again. “You know I always do.”

  “You need anything? Crackers? Water?”

  She shook her head. “I’m feeling a little less putrid today. Let’s hope it sticks.” She stood and shed her robe, reaching for a pair of jeans in her closet. “Bryce is a mess right now, Marj. Just give him some time.”

  Bryce was a mess. So was I. What would a fuck matter?

  Jade went on, “Maybe try to meet someone else in the meantime. Was there anyone interesting in your cooking class?”

  “Not really.”

  “Then get out of this house. Go into town. Get back to the gym. Anything.”

  “You guys need me here.”

  She smiled. “We can spare you for a few hours a day. You need to have your own life.”

  “But the boys…”

  “The boys are in school most of the day, and I’m not dead. I can still be a mother even when I’m nauseated twenty-four-seven.”

  I sighed, the truth ready to pour out of me. “I don’t want to meet anyone else, Jade. I want Bryce. It’s crazy, I know. Talk about baggage. No job. A psycho father. A needy mother. A kid with another woman. He looks horrible on paper, doesn’t he?”

  “Talon and his brothers are going to take care of the ‘no job’ thing, I think. At least they’re going to try. But you can’t escape the other three.”

  “I don’t want to escape Henry. He’s adorable and I love him. But I worry about him. Bryce doesn’t seem to be spending much time with him these days. Before all of this came to a head, I never saw Bryce without Henry. Now? He’s never with him.”

  “I know. Tal and I have talked about that. Bryce says his mom needs to focus on Henry right now. But what is Bryce focusing on? That’s a big reason why the guys decided to offer him employment here on the ranch. But it’s not a charity offer. The guys say Bryce is perfect for the job they have in mind.”

  “You think he’ll take it?”

  “I don’t know. Talon said he talked to him about it a little last night after dinner, but Bryce is adamant that he wants a job as a hand. He wants to do physical labor, which Talon understands. He’s trying to escape from his mind through exhaustion.”

  “If anyone can understand that, Talon can.”

  “Exactly. But they want to offer him more than that. A permanent position here with a profit share.”

  “I had no idea. Then again, since college, I’ve always told them I’m happy being their silent partner.” And I loved the idea of Bryce being around all the time. I didn’t voice that part, though.

  “They would’ve told you about i
t before they made the offer. I’m sure.”

  “Maybe. It doesn’t really matter. I trust them to do what’s best for the ranch and to look after my interests. Honestly, Jade, before everything went down, I thought about asking them to buy me out so I could go off and learn to cook. I mean really cook, like the great ones.”

  “I’d miss you terribly, but why not do it? Talon always talks about you studying at Le Cordon Bleu. If you don’t want to go that far away right now, what about culinary school in Denver? You’re so gifted, Marj. You could be one of the great chefs.”

  “I can’t leave right now. I’d never miss the birth of your baby. And you guys need me.”

  “We love having you here, and yes, we need you, but we’ll be fine. You need to live your life. You’re almost twenty-six years old. You need to go find your life. You might be a ranch heiress, but you’re not a rancher.”

  “Wait a minute. I worked just as hard as my brothers around here. My father saw to it.”

  “I get that. You know the business, but it isn’t your dream. It never has been. The guys—this place is their blood, their life-force. But you? Not so much.”

  I couldn’t fault my best friend’s observation. “I know. Still, this is home.”

  She smiled. “Home is where the heart is. Your heart may be with your brothers, with me, but you can’t fight your future forever.”

  “I’ll think about it,” I said, “but I’m not leaving anytime soon. Not until I see your bundle of joy. You’re stuck with me for several more months.”

  “Good enough.” She squeezed my arm. “I wouldn’t want to go through this without my best friend. Can you believe it? You have two new nephews, and you’re about to have two more.”

  “Well, one might be a niece,” I said, patting her still slim belly. “We don’t know what’s in here yet.”

  “I know. I just have a feeling it’s a boy. We’ll see. All I care about is that it’s happy and healthy. And that it never has to go through the hell its father and brothers have been through.”

  “It won’t.” I smiled. “We’ve got to be due for some good luck in this family about now.”

  Jade stood. “Excuse me.” She placed her hand over her mouth as she walked quickly to the bathroom.

  Sick again, the poor thing.

  No way was I going anywhere.

  I was putting dinner on the table when Talon walked in wearing dirty jeans and a tattered shirt.

  “What happened to you?”

  “Nothing. Just decided to help the guys out in the fields today. Does a body good every now and then.”

  Interesting. That was exactly what Bryce was after. Talon had come such a long way, but his past still haunted him sometimes. How could it not? At ten years old, he’d been held for two months, repeatedly starved, beaten, and raped.

  I tried not to think about what my brother had been through. It messed with my head. Now he and Jade had taken in the Robertson boys, who’d been through much of the same, so I couldn’t not think about it. In fact, it invaded my thoughts constantly, so I tried to take from it the most positive things I could. Tenderness in handling the boys, and a vision of my brother’s endurance.

  My brother had the strength of a Titan.

  “Dinner’s ready, so get cleaned up. I’m going to call the boys, and then I’ll take a plate in to Jade.”

  “You don’t have to.” Jade entered the kitchen, dressed and looking…well…a little peaked. “I want to eat with my family tonight.”

  “Hey, blue eyes.” Talon pressed his lips against hers.

  Jade smiled. “You’re a mess.”

  “I’ll be clean in a few. Just a quick shower.” He kissed her again and walked toward their bedroom.

  Jade sat down at her place at the kitchen table. “Ugh. Now I’m feeling crappy again.”

  “Go back to your room. I’ll take care of things.”

  “No. Those little boys need me. They need a mother, and I need to be here. Talon needs me. You need me.”

  “We need you to rest for your baby.”

  “The doctors assure me that everything is fine. I promise I’ll go right back to the bedroom after dinner. I have to do this. Women have been having babies for millennia. This isn’t an illness.” She stuck out her tongue. “Even though it feels like it sometimes.”

  “Have it your way.” I set the salad on the table.

  The boys ambled in.

  “You eating with us tonight, Miss Jade?” Donny asked.

  “Yes, sweetie. I’ve missed seeing your face at the table.”

  He still wouldn’t call her Mom. Jade looked slightly disappointed, but she smiled anyway. She was determined to let the boys go at their own pace.

  My eyebrows shot up.

  Their own pace.

  Little boys weren’t the only creatures who needed to go at their own pace. Was I rushing Bryce?

  He’d wanted me last night. The physical evidence couldn’t have been faked.

  But Bryce was fighting his own demons—demons I understood well.

  Many times I’d wondered if I might be headed down the same path as my own mother. Insanity. These things could be genetic, though Melanie insisted that if any of us were going to follow the path of our mother, we’d have shown signs by now.

  Bryce was concerned, with good reason.

  His father was a complete psychopath—possibly even worse than Ruby’s father had been.

  Tom Simpson had lived a double life—devoted husband and father, attorney and mayor of Snow Creek by day. Psychotic pedophile rapist by night.

  The stuff nightmares were made of.

  Nightmares Bryce must have every time he nodded off to—

  “Marj!”

  I turned. Jade was doubled over in her chair. I rushed to her. “What’s going on?”

  “I don’t know. Get Talon. Please.”

  Chapter Eight

  Bryce

  I signaled the bartender at the dive in Grand Junction. “Another here, please.”

  He pushed the rotgut bourbon down the wooden bar. It landed right in front of me. The guy was good.

  I shot it quickly, letting it claw like fire-dipped tentacles down my throat until it warmed my belly.

  Joe had told me about this place. He’d stumbled in one night when he was at his worst and had gotten some really good advice from an old-timer. I wasn’t looking for advice so much as an escape. The Steels were bound and determined to make me some kind of honorary brother. I should be flattered. Thrilled.

  But I didn’t want it. All I wanted was to make an honest day’s pay for an honest day of hard labor.

  I signaled to the barkeep for another. The glass slid down the wooden bar once more and then stared up at me, the brown liquid swirling.

  I turned my head away from the drink. Another man about my age sat at the end of the bar, and a few stragglers sat at tables. A cocktail waitress was taking their orders. She sported cropped platinum-blond hair with black roots. Her face was pretty but worn, but her body… She wore a pink tank top and a denim miniskirt with stiletto sandals. I wondered if she also worked as a stripper. Her legs were muscular and could easily make their way up and down a pole. A decent chest too.

  She met my gaze. Her eyes were a striking dark blue.

  I smiled and picked up my shot, gesturing to her.

  She turned back to her customer.

  Okay.

  So much for that.

  I’d told Marjorie Steel that all I could give her was a good fuck. It had taken every bit of my strength to leave her bedroom yesterday. Every damned ounce.

  And now I was getting shot down by a worn-hard cocktail waitress.

  Served me right.

  I shot my third bourbon quickly.

  Only to look down to see the waitress shove a napkin toward me before disappearing into the back room.

  I get off at 7.

  Scribbled underneath was an address in Rosevale, one of the more crime-ridden areas in Grand Junction. About
a fifteen-minute drive from the bar.

  I checked my watch. Six forty-five. I signaled the barkeep. One more shot, and I’d be on my way.

  “What’s your name, cowboy?”

  I gazed at the woman in the denim miniskirt. How she’d beaten me here was beyond me. I’d left my car at the bar and taken a cab. I felt okay, but after four shots, I didn’t trust my blood-alcohol level.

  “You deaf?” she asked.

  I cleared my throat. “Bob.”

  “Yeah? I’m Alice.” She giggled. “Bob is not your name. You don’t look like a Bob.”

  “I am a Bob, but you are definitely not an Alice”—I eyeballed the nametag she still wore—“Heidi.”

  “Okay, fine. We’ll play it your way. Come in, Bob.”

  I entered the modest studio apartment. The queen-size bed in the corner was neatly made, and my gaze zeroed in on it.

  That was where I’d fuck this woman.

  My groin was tight.

  “You want a drink, Bob?”

  “Sure. Bourbon if you have it.”

  “I do. Not crazy about it myself, but I keep everything on hand.” She walked into her kitchenette and pulled a bottle out of a cupboard.

  “What are you having?” I asked.

  “I don’t drink.”

  “Really? And you work at a bar?”

  “Precisely why I don’t drink. I smoke a little weed, though. You want some?”

  I shook my head. “Never enjoyed it.”

  She handed me the bourbon in a half-pint mason jar. Cute. “You mind if I have a little? Just helps me unwind. Get in the mood.”

  “Uh…sure. Whatever.”

  She pulled out a black jar from her refrigerator and then grabbed a pipe out of a drawer. “Make yourself at home.”

  Again I eyed the bed. We both knew why I was here. If I took a seat there, we could move forward quickly.

  But I couldn’t do it. I sat down on the love seat across the room and set my drink on the end table.

  “Wait,” she said. “Let me get you a coaster.”

  I nodded. Nice. A small place, but she took pride in it. Bed made. Coasters.