Melt With You: Into The Fire Series

by J. H. Croix

  Later that afternoon, my phone buzzed on the table. Spinning it around, I saw Owen’s name flash on the screen and considered whether to answer right now. Harlow had announced she needed to go into the grocery store. Though I had wanted to go with her, I needed do some work online.

  While it was true I could do a lot of what needed to be done from a distance, this company acquisition was fresh, so it called for my focus. I also needed to get caught up on emails related to a few matters at headquarters in San Francisco. As such, I was situated on a stool at the island in the kitchen with a cup of coffee, and a fire in the woodstove. Figuring there was no reason not to take the call, I tapped the screen, answering by speaker.

  “Hey man, what’s up?”

  “Hey, I was just calling to ask the same of you. I was talking to the lead engineer on one of the projects, and she mentioned you’re not in Anchorage. Did I miss something?” Owen asked.

  I chuckled, realizing I hadn’t bothered to let Owen know I was taking off for a few days. I knew it would lead to questions, but I figured I might as well fill him in.

  “Oh, and Ivy mentioned you’re at Harlow’s place in Willow Brook. She’s asking me questions about your past and how come you’ve never been serious with anyone. She also told me I would be responsible for kicking your ass if you hurt Harlow,” Owen added with a wry chuckle.

  “I see.”

  “You planning to let me know what the hell is going on?”

  I ran a hand through my hair with a sigh and took a sip of coffee. “Of course. I suppose I should’ve updated you that I was going to run things from a distance for a few days. I ran into Harlow in Anchorage at the hotel, and now I’m here.”

  “I think we’ve covered that part, although now I know how you ended up there. Ivy will kick your ass if you hurt Harlow, so I’m wondering if that’s something she needs to worry about.” I could practically feel Owen’s eye roll through the phone line.

  “Look, maybe it’s crazy, but Harlow means something to me. I know I probably need to get back to Anchorage. The timing for me to be gone more than a day or two isn’t great.”

  “It’s not a big deal. If you need me to, I can head up there. I was only calling because we have a small mutiny with two of the engineers.” Owen didn’t push me on Harlow, which was a relief for the moment. I was still muddling through my own feelings and not quite in a place to explain them. He continued, “You know how we set up the computer monitoring for the internal systems?”

  “Yeah. Like we always do. What’s happening?”

  “One of them was trying to download the patented designs offsite. It wasn’t possible because of the firewall, but I called up there this morning when I checked the alerts. Honestly, I think we should both meet there to deal with this. It sounds like it’s not great timing for you, and I’m sorry. How about we meet there tomorrow, and then I’ll stay? You can head back to Willow Brook once we resolve this.”

  “Fuck,” I muttered. “There’s always something. It’s a good engineer team. I don’t like to see them pulling this kind of bullshit.”

  “Of course not, but better now than later. We’ve got two problem staff to deal with. The rest probably need a morale boost, and a reminder that if we hadn’t bought out the company, it was on the way to going under. So we’ll meet there tomorrow then?”

  Owen didn’t waste much time when it came to problem-solving. He preferred to address issues head-on. Beyond our long friendship, that was another factor that made it easy for us to work together. We had similar styles and weren’t much for endless planning meetings.

  “Yeah, I can be there in the morning. Do you need me to pick you up at the airport?”

  “No, I’ll drive. I have a list of things Ivy would like me to pick up for the holidays. Want to fill me in on what’s going on with Harlow? I told Ivy that there was no way you would hurt Harlow on purpose, but I’ve never known you to be serious, not since grad school.”

  Owen knew what had happened with my last serious relationship. We didn’t speak of it much because there wasn’t much else to say. In hindsight, I wasn’t too broken up about it, although I had loved Cheryl in the only way I knew how at that age. More than anything, it had been a wake-up call about keeping my eyes on what mattered. At the time, that had been my fledgling business.

  Harlow had spun everything on its axis, landing me on a different continent, relationship-wise. I considered what to say to Owen, opting for the simplest and most brutally honest explanation.

  “Harlow’s different. Tease me if you want, but I want something with her. The only problem is, I’m not so sure she wants the same thing.”

  Owen was quiet long enough that I deduced I’d startled him. “You there?”

  He chuckled. “Oh, I’m here. Just didn’t quite expect that. I’m the first to argue that finding the right woman is the best thing ever. I wouldn’t give up Ivy for anything. Of all the things you don’t need to worry about with Harlow, you certainly don’t need to worry about her wanting you for your money. Her father cut her off, and she didn’t even care.”

  His comment was an oblique reference to my ex. Of course, my ex hadn’t had the sense to look at the long-term, but by then, it didn’t matter anymore. I was damn relieved she’d shown her true colors early on.

  “I know. I always said Howard May was a fucking asshole. The way he treats Harlow is bullshit. She’s his fucking daughter. It’s not about the money, but I can’t believe he cut her off just because she refused to work with him,” I said.

  “Totally agree with you there.”

  Taking a deep breath, I decided to go straight to the heart of what had been spinning through my thoughts. I wasn’t much for asking for advice, but Owen was one of the few friends I turned to. “I’ve got a question for you.”

  “What’s that?”

  “Any suggestions on how to persuade Harlow this is worth it?”

  Owen laughed softly. “Damn. Never thought anyone would come to me for relationship advice.”

  “Yeah, well, I never thought I’d be asking.”

  “For starters, I think you need to be clear on what you mean by this,” Owen explained.

  “Look, man, I’m in love with her. That’s what I mean by this.”

  I think I stunned him into silence, although I’d done the same to myself. It wasn’t as if I hadn’t realized Harlow meant a lot to me. Yet, the ease with which that word slipped out was shocking.

  “What the hell? Don’t take this the wrong way, but don’t you think things are moving a little quickly? If my math is right, it’s only been a few days,” Owen finally said.

  A flash of defensiveness rose inside. “No, it’s been over a year. When you two threw us together at your place last year, well, let’s just say, something happened. It might have been only one night, but I never forgot. I’m getting some sense of why trust doesn’t come easy to her, but that’s my biggest roadblock right now.”

  “Damn, you know how to keep things quiet,” Owen muttered. “I think you’re just gonna have to show her. I don’t have any great relationship advice. I’m still pretty sure the only reason Ivy’s with me is because she didn’t have enough sense to tell me no.”

  At that, I laughed. I had said something along that variation many times to tease him. “Maybe it’s true, but I’m pretty sure she loves you too. Do me a favor…ask Ivy.”

  Owen’s laugh rumbled through the line. “Will do. I suppose I can assure her she doesn’t need to worry about you breaking Harlow’s heart.”

  “Hell no.”

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Max

  Later that evening, I took a pull of my beer and glanced across the counter at Harlow. She was in the midst of chopping onions for a stir-fry she was making. She clearly liked to cook, and I finally decided to ask a question that had been feathering through my thoughts every so often.

  “So tell me, with your dad traveling all over the place and taking you with him when you were growing up, when
did you learn to cook?”

  Harlow’s wide brown eyes met mine, a flicker of sadness in them. It passed quickly. She lifted the cutting board and carefully used the knife to slide the onions into a pan.

  “Before my mother died, I used to spend time with her in the kitchen. I was pretty young, so I didn’t learn too much, but she loved cooking. Later, one of my nannies got me this mini oven-stove thing, something I could use in a hotel. She knew I loved to cook and bake, so she taught me a few things. Then, I went off to college and it was a bit of trial by fire. I guess I sort of taught myself. If I ever build my own place, the most important room will be the kitchen. I know how I would want it set up and everything,” she said with a little laugh, her cheeks staining pink.

  I fucking hated hearing how lonely her childhood must’ve been. My own childhood stood out in stark contrast. My parents had their noses in everything I did, much to my chagrin when I was a teenager. My mother had actually insisted I learn to cook because she didn’t want her son to turn out to be a man who couldn’t cook a good meal for himself, or someone he loved. Her words, not mine.

  I wanted to give Harlow everything she wanted. That meant I needed to figure out a way for my life to be a little more settled. I didn’t travel quite as much as I used to, now that my company was well-established, but I still traveled some. I didn’t know if Harlow had strong feelings about where she lived. I did know I was bound and determined to figure something out that meant we could be together.

  My mind turned to the next matter at hand. I needed to let her know I would be leaving tomorrow for a day or two, and I wasn’t sure how she was going to react.

  “By the way, I have to head into Anchorage tomorrow. We have a personnel issue to deal with, and Owen’s meeting me there.”

  Harlow’s eyes flicked to mine from where she was adjusting the heat on the burner under the onions. Her expression was carefully bland, and I didn’t like it. Even though we had only spent a few days together, I had come to learn she was quite expressive, her face an open book, when her guard was down. When her mask was firmly in place, her expression went almost blank, like this. I wanted to shake her fucking father and beat the crap out of every man who had hurt her since then.

  “Okay. It’s not like I expected you to stay,” she finally said, her words measured.

  “I’ll be back in a few days. You can count on it,” I said flatly.

  Harlow stared at me, her hand pausing in the motion of stirring and then picking up again as she looked away. “Max, I don’t have any expectations.”

  Oh, hell no. I was not going to allow the conversation to go in this direction. I slipped off the stool and rounded the counter. Wrapping my arms around her waist from behind, I could feel the tension vibrating through her body.

  “Harlow, maybe I wasn’t planning on this, but I’m not going anywhere. Where I might be geographically doesn’t change a thing with us. Anchorage is only forty-five minutes away, when the weather’s good at least. Don’t you dare go thinking I’m going to drive away and that’s the end of us.”

  I felt her breath hitch. She stirred the onions again and then turned the burner off, setting the spatula on the counter. She didn’t turn in my arms, though, and held herself still. When I heard her take a shaky breath, I realized she was crying, or at least on the verge of tears.

  “Harlow, look at me,” I murmured into her hair, my heart squeezing so hard it hurt.

  Her hands curled around the edge of the counter as if she needed something to hold onto. Her knuckles went white with her grip. “Max, you can’t do this. I can’t do this.”

  Rather than trying to push the issue, I tucked my head into the crook of her neck and simply held her. She took several shaky breaths, each one tightening the fist clenched around my heart.

  If you had told me I was going to fall for Harlow, for any woman, so thoroughly that I wouldn’t even think twice about it, I would’ve laughed long and hard. A single night with her, over a year ago now, had scared the hell out of me. I knew now that I hadn’t quite been ready at the time to face the emotion only Harlow could elicit. She stirred deep waters. She reminded me what I could have, the very thing I’d told myself wasn’t worth fighting for, once upon a time.

  Now, I knew so completely what she meant that I had cast aside any logical, rational arguments to make against it. There was no way in hell I wasn’t going to fight for this, for us, for her.

  It fucking slayed me to sense even a glimmer of the pain she felt. I didn’t know everything in her heart. I certainly hadn’t pieced together all of her past. I really only knew she had lost her mother when she was young and had grown up with an emotionally absent father who had been the opposite of supportive to her.

  I couldn’t even imagine Harlow trying to work with her father, not with the way he worked. Then, to hear what had happened with Cliff—or rather, the fucking asshole, as I’d come to call him in my mind—had likely served to rub salt in the open wounds left behind by her father’s emotional neglect.

  Those bits and pieces of information helped me understand why she was so guarded, but I was still flying blind. Once upon a time, I would’ve thought I could pick my way through the rubble of this. Yet, everything paled in comparison to the depth of what I felt for Harlow. Nothing even came close. Harlow had shown me that you couldn’t know what love was until something was on the line.

  I had to get this right. I took it as a win that Harlow didn’t shove me away, and her breath slowly evened. I lifted my head, breathing her in. I had one hand curled around her waist, my palm splayed over her belly. I could feel every breath she took and the subtle thud of her heartbeat echoing through her body.

  Lifting my other hand, I brushed her hair away from her face, pressing a kiss to her temple. Eventually, the tension eased in her body, and her grip loosened on the edge of the counter. Only then did I speak.

  “I didn’t plan on this, on us. If I’d had a little more courage last year, I wouldn’t have left.” I could sense she was listening, so I kept going. “Before you start worrying, I didn’t make up my reason for leaving last year. There was an urgent business meeting, and I needed to be there. It’s just that it gave me an easy out. Maybe you don’t want to say it yet, but I knew that night that this thing between us wasn’t just lust.”

  I paused, considering my words carefully. “It’s not. I know it, and I know you know it too. I’m not going to pretend I understand everything that’s going on with you because I don’t. But I think I’m getting an idea why you think we can’t do this. Or rather, why you think you can’t do it.”

  I waited, trying to gauge how she might be responding with nothing but the feel of her body in my arms to go on. “I’m not going anywhere, Harlow. I don’t give up. I sure as hell won’t give up on us.”

  Harlow finally turned in my arms. Her cheeks were damp with tears, and her eyes glistened. The look in her gaze nearly killed me—so raw and so vulnerable. As I watched, she shuttered her gaze. It was as if she was battening down the hatches around herself inside.

  “Max, you can’t know how this is going to go. I’m already in too deep. You don’t even live here. This is… I don’t know, a little island floating outside of your actual life. Don’t…”

  Anger pierced me. Not anger with Harlow, but anger at every event and every person in her life who had boxed her in like this. It was as if she felt like she couldn’t believe in something. When I shook my head sharply, her words trailed off.

  “Don’t tell me that. I can run my company from anywhere. Hell, when my best friend is here in Alaska doing pretty much what I do, I can do the same. I don’t care about the details. We’ll figure it out.”

  Emotion hit me hard, and I dipped my head because words weren’t enough. I fit my mouth over hers and poured everything into our kiss. Cupping her face with my hands, I swept my tongue inside the warm sweetness of her mouth, moaning when her tongue tangled with mine. On a gasp, she arched into me and kissed me back, just as hard and
rough.

  A soft cry escaped her throat when I drew back. Another tear rolled down her cheek, and I wiped it away with my thumb, never once looking away.

  I certainly didn’t know everything, but I knew one thing with absolute faith. I loved Harlow, and I would fight for her.

  “I love you, you know.”

  Her eyes widened, pure terror entering her gaze. She shook her head rapidly, her breath coming in shuddering gasps. “You can’t know that, Max. It’s too soon.”

  “I know what I feel, and this feels right. Just trust me.”

  As soon as those last three words slipped from my lips, I realized I couldn’t have chosen a worse thing to say to her. Life had not given her many reasons to trust men, if any.

  She surprised me by remaining still, and simply holding my gaze. I wished I could climb inside of her mind and disprove every shouting doubt. I practically held my breath, and then she lifted a hand, placing it on my chest, right over my heart.

  “I think sex is on your brain. You’re confusing that with love. Go to Anchorage tomorrow.”

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Harlow

  Sitting across the table, I looked over at Maisie, who was holding her toddler, Max, on her lap. He was a cute little boy, with Maisie’s curly dark hair, and was all wiggles. My heart squeezed a little, and I looked away. His presence was a dual whammy for me—he shared Max’s name, and his existence was a reminder of the child I didn’t have.

  “I’ve gained twenty pounds,” Lucy announced, as she laid a card on the table.

  Susannah, who sat at an angle across from her, laughed and shook her head. “Well, I gained almost forty while I was pregnant. So count yourself lucky if twenty is your max.”

  Lucy rolled her eyes and took a sip of her water. Maisie was hosting card night at the home she shared with Beck, and had invited me to come. Beck was out with the guys. Their younger daughter, Carol, was sound asleep in her crib upstairs. Maisie had a handy baby monitor sitting in the center of the table. Thus far, all we’d heard was the steady sound of baby Carol’s breathing and a few gurgles.