Toxic (Book Three of the Twisted Series 3)

by Emily Rose

This kind of love was meant to be forever, through thick and thin. I wasn’t an idiot. I knew that it was crazy, and I knew that not everyone made it, but I was also determined.

  I wouldn’t give up until she said the words that had the power to end it, and maybe not even then. If there was one thing I had learned about myself these past few years, it was that I was a fighter. I was so lost in my own thoughts that I hadn’t realized where I was until I looked up. Somehow, I had ended up at the bar I used to work at.

  It didn’t look that much different, except for a few upgrades here and there. I stood at the entrance and debated only a minute about walking inside before I actually did.

  When I came through the double doors, I instantly heard the music that played lowly in the background. I wasn’t sure what song it was as I took in the bar that I used to tend.

  The wall was lined with every type of liquor you could imagine and in the center was where all the glasses hung upside down. The bar itself was made of wood, shiny and smooth to the touch. I could see the booths that lined the opposite wall of the bar and the tables in the center. To my right, I saw more tables and they still had the garage type door that you could pull up to bring in some fresh air on warm days.

  “Miles Conrad! No fucking way!”

  I heard my name a split second before someone crashed into me. I stumbled back a step as the person wrapped their legs and arms around me in a bear hug before they dropped to their feet again. It was when I saw her face that I realized who it was.

  She was older, but it was her. I could see the familiar scar on her neck. It ran from her jawline to just above her collarbone. She had changed her hair a bit, but it was still the same long dark brown I remembered, but it was her hazel eyes that told me she hadn’t changed at all.

  They were bright and full of life.

  Emma smiled up at me. She was still short, the top of her head barely reaching my shoulder, but I knew the girl could do some damage if she had to. I had seen her knee several guys between the legs on the regular. I was just glad I had never been one of them.

  “Emma?” I said.

  She nodded and then punched me in the chest, “Yes, it’s me. Who the hell did you think I was? And I can’t believe you waited this long to come see me.”

  I grinned, “I’m sorry. I just…I don’t know…I’ve been just living life I guess.”

  Emma rolled her eyes, “Oh, please. You haven’t been living life. You have been just stuck in Georgia country.”

  I arched an eyebrow at her. “Georgia is a state.”

  She laughed and then spun on her heel, walking back to the bar. I watched as she reached over and grabbed a bottle of Bud-Light before she walked back over, popping the cap off and holding it out to me. “You obviously need this,” she said with a smile.

  I took the beer, because she was right, I did need it. More when I saw it than before. I tilted the bottle back and took a long drink.

  “Hey babe…” I heard Thomas’s voice and looked over Emma’s head to see him coming out of the back room.

  He stopped when he saw me.

  “Miles? Is that you?” he asked with a surprised tone.

  “It’s me,” I said.

  Thomas walked around the bar and started toward us. When he got close enough, he reached out with his hand. “Shit man, I didn’t think I’d ever see your pretty ass again,” he said as I shook his hand.

  He stepped back and wrapped an arm around Emma’s shoulders, pulling her in close and planting a kiss on her temple.

  “So, I guess you two finally quit playing cat and mouse?” I grinned.

  Emma rolled her eyes, but it was Thomas who responded.

  “Yeah, and there’s something else too,” he said and then I watched as he reached down and placed his hand on Emma’s stomach.

  It didn’t take me long to realize what he meant. “No way,” I said.

  “Yep, we are going to have a baby,” he said.

  Emma laughed, “We aren’t going to have anything. I’m the one that’s going to have a baby. You’re just the one who planted it there,” she said.

  I closed my eyes for half a second and then opened them. “Yeah, too much information, Em.”

  Thomas shrugged, “Well, you know what I mean.”

  I laughed at them.

  Emma and Thomas had always had a thing for each other back when I worked here. It drove me up the fucking wall, because I was constantly in the middle of their drama. He would bitch about her and she would bitch about him, back and forth until finally, I made the point that they needed to get their shit together.

  I guess I could almost use that advice now. Go figure.

  “Anyway, enough about us, what about you? How have you been?” Thomas asked, pulling me from my thoughts.

  I took another drink of my beer and answered. “Well, I got married, but I’m failing at it,” I said and inhaled deeply at how much truth was in that statement.

  Emma blinked. “What? No, you can’t be serious.”

  I nodded. “Pretty damn serious. She’s back in Georgia right now. Probably filing for divorce as we speak,” I said.

  Thomas and Emma gave me that look. The one I hated more than anything. Pity.

  “Why isn’t she here with you?” Emma asked.

  I sighed. “She had work, school, and her mother’s wedding, so she couldn’t come with me.”

  “Why are you here?” Thomas asked this.

  I laughed once, but it held no humor. “And this is where it gets fucked up. I’m here to help Mia’s brother, but you both know the history I have with Mia.”

  “Oh fuck,” Thomas said.

  “Miles, I should seriously kick your ass right now. I don’t know your wife, but I do know Mia and you know how much I can’t stand that bitch,” Emma said.

  I nodded. “I would probably deserve the ass kicking too.”

  She gave me a weak smile and then reached up to lightly touch my forearm. “Well, you’re here now, so how about we go out tonight? We can catch up more and I’m sure you wouldn’t mind a few drinks.”

  “That sounds like a plan,” I said.

  Thomas reached up and hit my shoulder. “Don’t worry man. I’m older than you and I still don’t understand women, especially this one,” he said.

  Emma slapped him then. “Shut up.”

  I laughed once at them. “It’s good to know I’m never going to figure women out, Thomas. Thanks for that,” I said.

  He shrugged. “Just saying buddy. You aren’t alone.”

  I shook my head and saw Emma roll her eyes.

  “Come back around 8 pm. We should be done by then,” Emma said.

  “Alright,” I answered and then handed her my nearly empty beer bottle, “How much for the beer?” I asked as I started digging my wallet out once she grabbed it.

  She shook her head. “Don’t worry about it. It’s on the house.”

  I paused with my wallet open. “Are you sure? I don’t mind being a paying customer for a change.”

  “You’re good man,” Thomas said.

  “Thanks guys,” I said and then put my wallet back into my back pocket.

  “No problem. We’ll talk to you later,” Emma said and then reached up to plant a kiss on my cheek.

  I nodded and then shook Thomas’ hand once more before I headed out.

  When I walked outside, the humid Arkansas weather hit me like crashing against a wall of humidity, and I was brought back to all those summers I spent here. It was early September, but summer was refusing to let go, which wasn’t a surprise to me. You just never knew about the weather in this state. It varied daily.

  I shoved my hands into my pockets and started down the sidewalk again. I was heading back toward Mia’s house when my phone started ringing in my pocket. I pulled it out to see Mia’s name on the screen.

  A feeling slowly settled over me. It was heavy, like the feeling you got when you were about to get news on a family member, only you already knew it was bad news. You felt i
t. Like someone had stepped right on your stomach, preventing you from breathing.

  I stopped walking and slowly answered the phone.

  “Miles….” Mia’s voice carried through the line and I closed my eyes, because I could hear that she had been crying.

  “It’s Derek…. he’s….” she stopped, crying silently into the phone and then I heard her take a deep breath as she tried to continue, “He’s gone. They found him in his room just a few minutes ago. He hung himself.”

  I kept my eyes closed as she cried into the phone, but it was at that moment that I felt the loss. Like a hole had been created in my chest, because I knew that I was too late.

  I had run out of time.

  I had failed.

  Chapter Twenty

  Ray

  We were only thirty or so minutes from Palm Bay. To say the air in the car on the drive down here was thick would be an understatement. Danny hadn’t asked any of the questions I thought she would, but that didn’t mean she hadn’t been thinking them. I was just glad I still had time to decide if I was going to tell her the truth or if I was going to make up another lie.

  It was horrible that I was even considering the lying part at all.

  But if I wasn’t even sure what the truth was anymore. That was the problem with lying. After so many lies, things started to get so messy that you lose the ability to tell what was true and what wasn’t.

  That was where I was, and I hated it.

  I could tell her that me and Jax were just friends and we were closer than before, but then I thought about how I had liked being in his arms and that made it feel like even if I told her that much, I was still telling a lie. I could tell her about Jax’s addiction, but that wasn’t my secret to tell. Hell, even he didn’t know I had picked up on it. As these thoughts ran through my head, I realized how much distance had been put between Danny and I since the night we walked into Twisted.

  We had been two totally different people then. Young, naïve.

  In love.

  “Are you okay?” Danny asked, pulling me from my thoughts.

  I blinked and looked away from the road just long enough to see her watching me. I returned my gaze to the road and took a deep breath, “Just thinking,” I said.

  “I can tell. Anything I can help with?” she asked.

  My heart ached. It wanted to just pour all these emotions out onto the table, but I refused to give it that release. I knew it wasn’t a good idea, because eventually, it would burst.

  And then I would be done.

  “No,” I said even as my heart fought to take over my mind.

  “Are you sure?” she asked.

  “Yes.”

  She was silent then, and I could tell I had just put even more distance between us. But I pushed this aside as we passed the sign that read, “Welcome to Palm Bay.”

  It was strange being back. For so long I had called this place home, but it didn’t feel like home anymore. It felt like I was entering an unknown country even though everything looked the same. Everything from the palm trees right down to the shops that lined the sides of the road. I eased to a stop at a red light and Danny spoke.

  “Not much has changed,” she said.

  “No,” I agreed as I took in the surrounding shops, streets, and anything else that I could.

  My phone chimed and for whatever reason, my heart picked up as I grabbed it from the center console and read the text that had arrived.

  It was from my mother.

  Mom-Are you in town yet?

  I sighed and decided to call her instead of trying to text and drive. I dialed her number just as the light turned green and we took off. She answered halfway through the second ring.

  “I’m assuming this means that you’re still driving,” she said in her cool voice. The one that told me she was trying to be motherly, but deep down inside, she was still the cold-hearted person she had always been.

  “We just got into town,” I said.

  “Great, we are at the house. Who’s all with you?”

  “Just Danny, Miles wasn’t back in town yet and well, Danny’s boyfriend isn’t coming,” I said and glanced sideways at her as I said it.

  She shrugged and then turned to look out the window. I sighed and returned my gaze to the road just as Mom began speaking once more.

  “Well, that is a problem, but I guess we will make it work,” she said.

  I was surprised by that answer, but I was also thankful she didn’t fly off the handle over the guys not coming too. There was no way I could ask Jax to come along since Miles wasn’t back and I knew for sure Danny wasn’t going to ask him.

  If she hadn’t picked up on anything strange between me and Jax yet, she surely would have if I had invited him knowing they were broken up and my husband couldn’t come.

  “I’ll see you in a few,” I told her.

  “Ok,” she answered before we hung up.

  I threw my phone back into the center console and flipped on my blinker as I turned down the road that would lead us to my house. I was almost scared to go back there for two reasons. One, I was fixing to meet my new stepfather for the first time, and two, I was about to see the place where I had almost lost Miles. That night Owen came after him had been the worst night of my life.

  I had thought Miles wasn’t going to make it, but he had. He had fought through everything Owen had done to him and came back to us.

  My heart ached for an entirely different reason than before. It ached at the memory of that night. There was nothing like watching someone you love get hurt and knowing that there wasn’t a damn thing you could do about it. I had to sit back and watch it happen.

  That night, I had failed him and to this very day, I blamed myself for what Owen had done. I had been weak, and it had almost cost Miles his life.

  He was so much stronger than he realized, and I admired that about him. My mind took me to a place it hadn’t been to in a long time.

  I felt my mouth open slightly as I sucked in a breath at the memory of the first night I had spent with Miles. My skin reacted to the memory as if he were right next to me, running his fingertips over it in a way no one ever had. I felt my heart pick up and if I closed my eyes, I could almost picture him hovering above me, staring into my eyes like I was the only person in the world that could break him. Fearful, yet so much lust.

  “Ray!” I heard Danny’s voice and snapped out of whatever trance I had been in.

  I saw the stop sign at the last second and slammed on the brakes. She reached up, catching herself on the dash with her hands as mine gripped the steering wheel tightly. We skidded, stopping just over the white line that was painted on the road.

  My heartbeat madly in my chest as cars drove by in front of us, passing as if someone hadn’t just about caused an accident. I could feel my breath coming quick as I slowly turned my gaze to Danny.

  She blinked, with her hands still on the dash and caught my eyes. We stared at each other for a second and then she started laughing. I stared at her as she fell back against the seat and held her stomach, not even taking time to breathe.

  The sound was contagious. I smiled and then joined her in the laughter. Soon, we were both rolling, and I released the steering wheel to wipe my eyes where tears had begun to form. I couldn’t stop even as I heard a car behind us honk their horn.

  “Go, go….” Danny said through her giggles.

  I tried to contain my laughter as I looked both ways and then took off again.

  “What the hell were you thinking?” Danny asked as we turned down yet another road. My house was just a few seconds away, so I knew I had to explain quick.

  “Uh, I was kind of thinking about the first night I was with Miles,” I admitted shamefully.

  She laughed. “You mean like the first time you had sex with him?”

  I nodded, but even I could feel the blush that started to fill my cheeks at the thought. I had nearly caused us to get into an accident, because I was thinking about sex with Miles
.

  Lovely.

  “Well, he must have left an impression on you,” Danny teased just as we pulled into my mom’s driveway and parked.

  I laughed once. “Uh, yeah. He did.”

  “Just imagine how it’s going to be when he gets back,” she said as I turned the engine off and pulled the keys out.

  Oh, man. I couldn’t even begin to think what might happen when he got back. I was pissed, but he was still my husband and my body still wanted him even if my mind thought it didn’t. I was so screwed. Miles had a way to get under my skin, in the worst way possible and the best way.

  I didn’t have time to respond to Danny, because I could see my mother standing on the front steps. She looked so different, but in a good way. She had gained some weight, cut her hair, and wore clothes that made her look her age instead of something that showed more boobs than anyone cared to see. It was a shocking transformation, but I was glad to see that she had cleaned herself up.

  “Wow!” Danny said, clearly just as shocked I was at the sight of Mom.

  I nodded and then opened my door, stepping out. Danny followed and we both closed our doors at the same time my new stepfather walked out of the house.

  I could feel my mouth drop open at the sight of him. I knew he had been younger than Mom, but I hadn’t expected him to look the same age as Miles. Samuel had dark dirty blonde hair and even from here, I could tell he had faded blue eyes. He was tall, at least six-foot, and had a body that looked as if it had spent hours surfing the waves. He was so not what I expected.

  “Holy shit,” Danny said, and I knew she had moved to stand beside me.

  I watched in stunned silence as Mom and Samuel walked toward us. I didn’t even move or speak when Mom wrapped me in a hug and then stepped back.

  “It’s good to see you girls,” Mom said.

  Samuel stuck his hand out for Danny and I to shake. “Hi. It’s so nice to finally meet you. Your mom has said so much about you.”

  Unlike myself, Danny reached out to shake his hand, while I stood there and stared at him like he was a foreign object and I might catch something if I touched him.

  He cleared his throat and pulled his hand back.