by Emily Rose
It wasn’t the largest one I’d seen, but it wasn’t the smallest either. The top reached the middle of my thighs and it was a pretty shiny, black with red roses engraved on each side. She stopped in front of it and stared down at it like it meant everything in the world to her.
That was when I took in the letters that were carved into the front of the headstone. It read, “Shelby Christian Wilson, Born July 21st, 2001-Died June 27th, 2013. Loving daughter, friend, and niece.”
“She was only 12 when I lost her. It was one careless act that took her from me. She was going to a basketball game and the bus got into an accident. Several kids were injured and three more were killed. My baby girl was one of them,” Anna said, and I knew without looking at her that she was crying.
“I’m so sorry,” I said weakly.
Anna looked up at me with eyes that were bright with tears. “I’ll never be over her death, and it’s hard every single day, but I’m dealing the best way I know how. The point I’m trying to make to you is that what has happened to you is a blessing, even if you don’t see it that way right now. You will. I was very young when I had my daughter and despite her father never being around, she knew she was loved. Don’t throw it all away before you give yourself time to process and think about everything,” she said.
I looked back at the headstone and read the name of the young girl that lost her life way too soon. That was when I realized something very important. Anna’s daughter never got the chance to grow up or fall in love with anyone. She never got the chance to have her own kids or see how beautiful life could be, even if it had the dark times beneath it all.
And that wasn’t fair.
Her life was taken by an accident that probably couldn’t have been helped, which made me wonder how I could even think about my situation the way I did, because I had a choice. It was mine to make and not everyone was lucky enough to get that option.
Anna’s daughter surely wasn’t.
If I gave up, I would be nothing more than the accident that took Shelby’s life.
*
Later that night, Anna dropped me off at my car and then drove off. My eyes scanned the dark streets around me as I tried to dig for my keys, and I was surprised to see that I was alone. Jaxson’s car was nowhere in sight and I knew Miles was at work tonight.
I pulled my keys out of my purse and was about to unlock my door when I heard them. Sirens. I looked down the street to the main road and watched as not one, but two police cars flew by at a high rate of speed with their lights going. Behind them, I saw an ambulance. My phone started vibrating in my pocket and I jumped at the sudden sensation. I rushed to pull it out of my back pocket and saw Danny’s name on the screen.
For whatever reason, my heart dropped as the feeling of dread washed over me. I answered the phone quickly and spoke, “Hel…hello?”
“Ray…. It’s…. oh my god….” Danny cried with fear.
My head spun then, because I knew something was very, very wrong. “Danny, what is it?”
She sobbed into the phone, “The bar. It’s…. it’s…. just come quick!”
I hurried inside my car and started the engine. I held the phone between my shoulder and ear as I threw it into gear and spun out of the parking spot. “I’m on my way,” I said and then hung up as I raced down the street and skidded to a stop at the stop sign. I pulled out onto the main road without even really looking to make sure no one was coming and sped toward Twisted.
It wasn’t until I got closer to the bar that the feeling I had earlier made sense. Fear spiked and my heart hit my throat as I pulled into the parking lot of Twisted.
“Oh my god….” I cried as I took in the emergency vehicles I had seen just a few minutes ago and threw my car in park, stepping out and standing behind the door.
I could feel the heat and I could see the roar of flames as they engulfed the entire building. The police cars I had seen earlier sat in the parking lot with their lights still going and their driver’s side doors open. Beside them, I saw the ambulance. Somewhere behind me, I could hear more sirens. My eyes scanned the parking lot and that was when I saw that Kevin’s truck and Miles’ car were parked in their usual spots, but then I saw that Jaxson’s car was also there.
“Ray!” I heard my name being called and I looked up to see Danny running toward me. Behind her, I saw Rachel and that was when I realized that my worst nightmare had come true. My heart stopped. Fear hit me in the center of my chest and stalled my breathing.
Jaxson, Kevin, and Miles weren’t with them, which only meant one thing. They were still inside Twisted. My eyes shot to the building as the flames roiled with so much anger that I could almost feel it deep inside my own body. Tears slid down my cheeks as my hand slowly reached down to my stomach and stopped there. I couldn’t take my eyes off the flames as they destroyed everything I’ve ever loved.
Before Danny and Rachel could reach me, one of the cops came running out of the building with someone over his shoulder. I watched as he laid that person on the stretcher for the EMT’s before he covered his mouth and nose again, rushing back into the flames. I didn’t wait on Rachel or Danny. I took off around the car door and ran straight for the person. My heart raced as I stared at the unknown person. That was when Rachel spoke from beside me, finally catching up.
She gasped. “That’s Jared. I saw him once before….”
I looked back at Jared.
His hair, and skin was covered in black ash. He wasn’t awake and I could see the burnt skin all the way down his right arm as the EMT’s rushed him toward the ambulance. I stood in stunned silence as an anger swelled inside my chest. I watched the EMT’s work to save Jared’s life and I couldn’t stop the thought I had at that very moment.
I wanted him to die. He didn’t deserve to live. Not when everyone I loved was still inside that damn building. I heard Rachel’s cries and looked over to see Danny holding her tightly. My eyes met Danny’s and I saw the fear I felt reflected in them. I spun around to the building and stood rooted to the spot as I counted the seconds. I could hear another siren in the background, but I didn’t look to see what it was as I stared at the door of Twisted.
That was when I saw him, the same cop, as he ran out the door with another person over his shoulder. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw another group of EMT’s as they rushed another stretcher toward him. The cop was barely able to get the person to the stretcher before he himself collapsed on the ground from inhaling the smoke inside. I watched as an EMT turned from the person on the stretcher and kneeled beside the cop. I didn’t wait for Rachel or Danny as I hurried forward. That was when I saw him.
Jaxson. I took in the black ash coating his skin and hair. His eyes were closed, and he wasn’t breathing. The EMT that wasn’t helping the cop worked on performing CPR on him as another ambulance pulled up into the parking lot with a fire truck behind them.
“Oh my god….” I heard Rachel cry from behind me.
“We got another one!” I heard someone yell and spun around to see the other group of EMT’s rush toward the second police officer as he carried another person over his shoulder out of the building.
“We got a heartbeat,” I heard one of the EMT’s say that had been trying to save Jaxson’s life.
Everything was happening so fast and I barely had time to register the fact that Jaxson was breathing and being moved to the back of the ambulance before my eyes shot to the third person the cop pulled out of the building. The EMT’s rushed around him and I saw who it was as they hurried past me. My heart hurt as tears rolled down my cheeks at the sight of him.
Miles. Just like Jared and Jaxson, he wasn’t awake, and he was covered in ash. From the middle of his left leg all the way to his left collarbone was burnt. He didn’t even look like the same person. I barely had time to process everything I was seeing before I heard someone yell behind me.
I spun around and saw the first cop that had collapsed on the ground yell at his partner, “Josh, wait!”
<
br /> But it was too late. He was already through the door. The fire truck was there and spraying water on the flames, but that was when I heard it. The building crashed to the ground, unable to stand anymore, and buried all those inside.
“Josh!!!” I heard the cop yell as he shot up from the ground and raced toward the building, but a firefighter caught him just in time and pulled him back.
“It’s too late, I’m sorry. You can’t, the structure is too unstable to go digging around in!” The firefighter yelled as he fought against the cop.
“Son of a bitch!” The cop yelled and jerked away from the firefighter before he dropped to his knees and covered his head with his arms.
My heart broke. My world stopped, because I felt that cop’s pain. I heard Rachel scream behind me, but her voice and everything else faded away as the truth struck me hard.
That cop’s partner hadn’t been the only one still in that building.
Kevin had been inside, and as I watched the flames still roll from the crumbled building; I felt the tears fall freely down my cheeks. The small piece inside my heart that Kevin had always kept alive burned out and I knew without a doubt that our goofy, strong, brave Kevin was gone.
I felt it.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
4 months later
Ray
I took in the sign that read “Welcome to Hampton, Georgia,” as I drove and took a deep breath. It had been four long months since that terrible night.
Four long months since I walked away from everyone and ran off to Florida to spend some time away from everything, I dropped out of all my classes, I even quit my job, explaining to Anna that I just couldn’t stay there anymore. Not after…not after we lost Kevin. I only stayed long enough to bury him and then I ran. I ran so fast that my heart was left on the ground by his headstone.
I didn’t talk to anyone, but no one reached out to me either. I knew my marriage was over, even thought Miles and I never filed for divorce and I still loved him. I knew my friendship with Danny was done and I knew that even if I never told them the truth about everything, they knew. I could see it in their eyes at Kevin’s funeral. I could see all of it.
And then there was Jaxson. He hadn’t spoken to me either, but I couldn’t deny the temptation I’ve had over the past four months to reach out to him. I wanted to make sure he was okay. I wanted to make sure Miles was okay. I wanted to make sure they were all okay, so after I pulled myself together, I decided the only way I would get some closure on everything was to return to Hampton.
Now here I was. Driving through the middle of town in a daze. My first destination was the police station. I wanted to thank that officer for risking his life to save those I loved. I wanted to tell his partner’s family that I was so very sorry that they lost Josh.
When I pulled into the police station, I parked next to the front entrance and shut my car off. I stared out the window as people walked in and out of the building. Once I knew I could hold myself together, I pulled my keys out of the ignition and got out of the car. My heart picked up as I eased my way inside the building and straight to the lady that sat at the front desk. She was older than me and dressed nicely.
As I approached her, she looked up and smiled. “Hi, can I help you?”
I cleared my throat. I had no idea how to ask such a question and I wasn’t even sure if they would tell me who the other cop was, but I had to try. “Um…I’m looking for someone. Last time I was here, he worked for this department. He was one of the officers who responded to the fire at the bar four months ago,” I said.
She blinked and I could tell she knew exactly which fire I was referring to. Not that I was surprised. The whole department had to have felt the loss of one of their own and that was something they would never be able to forget. Just like I couldn’t.
“Hold on a minute,” she said and then got up from her chair. I stood silently as I watched her vanish through the door. A few minutes later, she returned and sat back down at her chair, “He will be with you in just a minute,” she said.
“Thank you,” I said and walked over to sit down in one of the chairs in the room as I waited.
It was only five or so minutes before the door that led to the back of the building opened and I looked up to see the officer walk out. That night, I hadn’t got a good look at him, but now I could see him. His hair was short and black, cut like a Marine might wear theirs. His eyes were a dark green and they reminded me of fresh cut grass. He was tall and built a lot like Miles. Right now, he was dressed in uniform. I stood up quickly and his eyes caught mine.
“Are you the lady that’s looking for me?” he asked in a deep, yet calm voice.
I scanned his name badge and read “D. Kade,” before I met his eyes again and stuck my hand out sharply, “My name is Reanna Con-…” I paused and cleared my throat, “Adams. Reanna Adams. I was one of the people at the fire at Twisted,” I said.
Officer Kade blinked in surprise and then slowly took my hand in his, “Oh.”
I released his hand and spoke as evenly as I could, “I just wanted to thank you for what you did and…I wanted to tell you that I am so very sorry for your loss,” I said.
He stared at me for a minute before he spoke, “Well, I appreciate that, but that was four months ago. You didn’t have to come all this way to tell me that. It’s just what we’re here for and sadly, not all of us get to come home at the end of the day,” he said.
My heart hurt for him, his brothers and sisters, and their families. “I know, but I wanted to personally thank you and tell you how sorry I was.”
“I appreciate that,” he said.
I bit my lip before I released it and asked the question I really wanted to know, “I know this sounds crazy, but is there any chance I could get the name of your partner and maybe his family? I want to tell them how sorry I am for their loss,” I said.
Officer Kade stared at me a second before he looked over his shoulder at the lady at the desk and then back at me, “Come with me,” he said and then headed for the front door.
I looked around to see if anyone was watching us, but the lady at the desk seemed lost in her own world, so I followed Officer Kade out the door. We stopped at a black 2019 Dodge Charger. The lettering on the side was gray and it read, “Police,” along with everything else you’d picture a police car having. He opened the driver’s side door and grabbed something from his sun visor before closed the door behind him. I noticed a pen and notepad in his hand. He placed it on the hood of the car and started writing.
After a minute, he tore a piece of paper out of the notepad and folded it up before he held it out to me, “I’m not supposed to give you this, but I have a feeling you aren’t a bad person and you really are just trying to do the right thing,” he said.
I took the piece of paper from his hand and opened it. As I read over the handwriting, I realized it was an address and the name of his partner. I looked up to meet his gaze and smiled, “Thank you.”
“Don’t tell anyone how you got that. I could lose my job,” he said.
I folded the piece of paper again and shoved it into my pocket, “I won’t.”
“My name is Damian by the way,” he said.
“It’s nice to finally meet you, Damian,” I responded.
“Likewise. I hope that helps you find the closure you’re looking for,” he said.
“Me too,” I said with a smile.
Before he could respond, I heard the radio attached to his vest go off and a female dispatcher’s voice come through.
“PD to available city units,” she said.
I watched as Damian pressed a button on his radio and spoke into the speaker, “307 to PD, go ahead.”
“We got reports of a reckless driver on Oak Street, heading west. Caller stated they were swerving all over the road and almost hit a few parked cars,” she said.
“307 to PD, do you have a description of the vehicle?” Damian asked.
I watched as he waited for her t
o respond.
“PD to 307, caller stated it was a black Ford truck. Not sure of the year and they weren’t able to get the license plate number,” the dispatcher responded.
“307 to PD, 10-4. I’ll be in route from the station,” Damian said and then looked up at me, “I have to go,” he said.
“No, I understand,” I said.
He nodded once before he jumped in his car and backed out of the parking spot. I stood frozen to the spot as he sped out of the parking lot with his lights flashing. It took me a minute before I made my way to my car and got back in. I started the engine and then pulled out the piece of paper with the address on it. I put it into the Maps App on my phone and then followed the GPS across town to a small neighborhood. It was nice, and it seemed quiet as I eased down the two-lane road.
I heard the robot voice on my phone tell me I arrived at my destination and I eased to the curb to park. As I checked the mailboxes, I saw the house I was looking for. It was a nice brick home with white shutters. The front porch had white handrails and a large dark wooden front door. The yard looked like it had been kept up and there was a dark blue SUV parked in the driveway. It wasn’t until I saw the black, blue, and white flag hanging from one of the poles on the front porch that I knew I was in the right place.
I shut my car off and sat there a minute as I watched the home. My heart pounded inside my chest and I took a deep breath to calm it. After what seemed like forever, I got out and checked the road both ways before I hurried across. I wasn’t sure what I would say to Josh’s family, but I had to say something. Anything. When I reached the door, my fist paused a second before I knocked firmly on the glass in the door.
A minute or two passed before I heard footsteps on the other side and a second later, the front door came open. I was surprised to see a woman not much older than myself standing there with a child resting on her hip. She had dark brown hair and bright hazel eyes. The little girl resting on her side couldn’t have been more than six months old. She had big blue eyes and curly blonde hair.
