by Leta Blake
“I don’t think either of us really want that or we wouldn’t be here now.”
“What do you mean?”
RJ chucked up Aaron’s chin. “You confronted your mother. You wore a lacy jockstrap out the other night to flirt with men in front of me. You walked out from work. You didn’t use your safe word last night.” RJ shook his head. “Mr. Danvers, I think you want to get hurt. And I want to get hurt too. At least it means we feel something.”
Maybe we don’t have to get hurt. Maybe it could actually work somehow.
Squashing the rogue blaze of hope, RJ trailed his fingers down to Aaron’s ass. He squeezed, and Aaron trembled in his arms, his newly sprung erection pressing against RJ’s thigh.
“Last night, with you? I felt free,” Aaron said, his breath puffing against RJ’s collarbones. “I didn’t think of anything or anyone except us. I was completely in the moment. Do you know how often that happens for me?”
“Not often?”
“Try never. As for my mom, I didn’t have a choice.” Aaron dug deeper into RJ’s arms. “Carter told her about us. I don’t know if I’d have confronted her otherwise. But telling her the truth and not holding back? Walking out on her? I felt like a man out of prison for the first time in years.” He huffed a laugh. “But this morning…” He shook his head.
“This morning?”
“I don’t want to lose my mom.”
“Oh, Aaron,” RJ rubbed his cheek against the top of Aaron’s hair, breathing in his scent. His hands went back to that ass like always, holding it, gratitude that he was allowed filling him up. “Let’s go out to the living room. Constance is surely plotting my death and you need to eat something.”
Aaron wiped at his eyes and pulled back. “Yes. I need to get myself together.”
“It’s not that. I just want to make sure you’re taken care of. I have to go out to Chip’s studio today. We’re going to start putting down the first few tracks. The one you heard, and a few others I’m playing with.”
“And we need to talk with your mom and Doug,” Aaron said.
RJ wrinkled his nose. “I guess we do? But it just seems so awkward.”
Aaron pulled entirely free from RJ’s embrace, giving him a stern look. “Dating a student’s relative is something I always tried to avoid.”
“Well, we’ve mainly just been screwing, but…”
Aaron rolled his eyes. “You said the second time we were together that we were more than a hookup. You said we were lovers.”
“We are.”
Aaron nodded, poking at RJ’s chest. “That’s not something I ever meant to be with a former student or a relative of a current one.”
“I know. I can’t say I’m sorry, though.”
“No, me either,” Aaron said thoughtfully. “C’mon. Let’s call your mother. We should get it over with.”
“Yes. I guess we should.” He stood up and retrieved the tray. “But first, breakfast.”
During the drive to his mother’s house after a great session at the studio with Chip, RJ tried not to dread what was coming. He failed miserably. Carter was out with his mother and Perri and Beau had a playdate, so RJ had told his mom that he and Aaron were coming over to talk to her and Doug without telling her why.
RJ was happy to see Aaron’s car pull up to Doug and Mom’s house just as he came around the corner. He met Aaron on the sidewalk leading to the front door. Aaron was dressed nicely—the way he did for the classroom—and that meant his ass was on adorable display in lightweight trousers beneath a tucked-in button-up shirt covered in a soft rose print. He looked edible.
“Nervous?” Aaron asked as RJ took his hand.
“I guess. I’ve never done anything like this before. I don’t know what to expect, or what might happen.”
Or if you’ll bolt if things go badly.
He didn’t even know what “going badly” might look like.
Aaron squeezed his fingers, looking all teacher-like and adult. RJ wanted to kiss him. “It’ll be all right. It’s just necessary is all. Come on. Let’s get it over with.”
RJ opened the front door and felt disoriented by the lack of small feet pounding down the stairs and enthusiastic greetings and hugs. He hadn’t really been in the house during the day when the kids weren’t home. It was unnerving.
Even more unnerving was the look on Doug’s face when RJ brought Aaron into the living room. Mom and Doug were waiting there in their easy chairs with coffee mugs and worried expressions, and Doug’s only grew doubly so when Aaron came in.
Everyone stood awkwardly beside the coffee table until RJ gestured at Aaron and said, “Doug, this is—”
“Mr. Danvers. I know. He’s Carter’s favorite teacher.”
Aaron smiled and took Doug’s outstretched hand. “It’s good to see you again, Mr. Ward.”
“Oh, no, call me Doug, like I told you before.” He blinked between them and took the bull by the horns. “RJ, what’s going on? Why is Mr. Danvers here?”
“They’re dating,” Mom interjected. “Remember? I told you RJ was seeing someone.” She motioned at Aaron. “This is the someone.”
“Oh.” Doug looked between them with some confusion, but then shrugged. “I see. Let’s all have a seat.”
Mom and Doug took the lounge chairs, and RJ and Aaron sat on the couch. Aaron held himself quite stiffly, all prim and proper now that he had parents as an audience. Nothing like the man in RJ’s arms the night before.
Doug cleared his throat. “So, you wanted to meet with us, Mr. Danvers, because you were concerned about this?” He gestured between RJ and Aaron. “Since you’re Carter’s teacher?” The guess was close but not quite the issue, and RJ opened his mouth to say so, but Aaron beat him to it.
“Actually, I only found out that RJ was related to Carter by marriage just yesterday morning when the principal called me to her office to inform me that Carter had come to her to complain about me dating his stepbrother. I had no idea Carter even knew we were seeing each other, since as I said before, I didn’t know Carter was related to RJ.”
Doug tilted his head, obviously confused. He took a sip of his coffee and seemed to realize he’d been less than hospitable. “I’m sorry, would you like coffee?” he asked, lifting his mug.
“Good idea,” Mom said. “This sounds like it’s going to take a little time to fully understand.”
“I’m good. Thanks.” Aaron wiped his hands on his pant legs, a move RJ recognized as nerves, so he put his arm around Aaron’s shoulder and gave a reassuring squeeze. Oddly, Aaron shrugged him off with a strange smile and a cough.
“I’m fine too, thanks,” RJ said.
“All right. So, let me see if I understand so far. Carter complained to the principal? About the two of you dating?” Mom asked. “Why would he do that?”
“I think something about me dating his stepbrother has made him uncomfortable,” Aaron said. “Going to the principal is a fair thing for a student to do when they have a problem with a teacher’s behavior.” Aaron put up a hand. “I want to make it clear, Mr. and Mrs. Ward, I don’t have a problem with Carter and I’m not hurt or upset with him.” He gave a sweetly dimpled smile. “I hoped we could all work together to help Carter be more comfortable with whatever happens between RJ and me going forward. I won’t be his teacher forever, but RJ will be his brother for the rest of his life. We need to find a way to help him feel all right about things.”
“Carter doesn’t like me,” RJ said, hoping he didn’t sound as butthurt as he felt about it. If Aaron could be this mature about it all, then he could too. “I admit I don’t know why he even cares that I’m with you. He can barely stand to look at me.” RJ winked. “He must think you’re too good for me, Mr. Danvers.” Aaron’s eyes went wide and RJ had to hold back a chuckle. “I mean, Aaron.”
“How… Oh, heavens, I might regret asking this,” Mom said, looking between them carefully. “But how did you two meet? One of those apps, I’m assuming?”
“No,
” Aaron said and looked to RJ.
“Aaron was my teacher,” RJ said.
The room went deadly silent. Betsy looked at Doug, and Doug looked at Betsy.
The moment hung dangerously before Aaron jumped in, waving his hands to dispel whatever it was they were thinking. “It was forever ago. My first year teaching. I taught high school back then, English Comp, and RJ was a senior.”
That seemed to make it worse.
“Nothing happened!” Aaron said, babbling. “Not back then. I barely noticed him. He was weird and gawky, and stared at me too much. I gave him a C. It was a generous grade.”
RJ couldn’t stop a chuckle. “C-minus.” But his mother was still pale, and Doug didn’t look comfortable either. He decided to nip it all in the bud. “Hey, I’m not saying I didn’t think Aaron was attractive back then. But he was my teacher and nothing more. When I ran into him after a gig last week, we got caught up. Turns out I’m an adult now and so is he.” RJ raised a brow pointedly.
Doug cleared his throat again and looked at Mom. Whatever passed between them seemed to result in a kind of reluctant acceptance.
“I see,” Mom said, finally. “It’s a little awkward, isn’t it? On the surface, it doesn’t look that good.”
“But nothing untoward happened while RJ was in school, Mrs. Ward,” Aaron said. “I promise.”
“Of course,” she said, reaching out to touch Aaron’s arm briefly. “I believe you, Aaron. We both do. Don’t we, Doug?”
“Yes,” Doug said, but his brows were still furrowed. “But I still don’t see why Carter would care about any of this? Why would he want to get you in trouble with your principal?”
“Remember our conversation at the dance the other night?” Aaron asked.
“Before the principal intervened, yes. We were talking about my concerns that Carter might be…” He trailed off and looked guiltily at Mom. Great. Keeping secrets already. The beginning of the end. “I should have told you about this Betsy. I just didn’t know how to bring it up.”
“Bring what up?”
“I think Carter might be gay.”
“Oh?” She blinked. “But RJ’s gay and you know I totally accept him. Why would you think I’d care?”
“Because…” Doug swallowed hard. “Well, honey, I’m bi. And I think he got it from me.”
Doug was bi? RJ blinked in surprise, trying to make sense of that. He’d never thought…never imagined. But wait. “Got it from you?” RJ scoffed. “It’s not exactly helpful to think of sexuality that way. It’s not a disease you catch or inherit.”
“You’re bi?” Mom asked softly.
RJ’s stomach flipped over. The hint of betrayal in his mom’s voice pushed a protective button inside, and he wanted to insinuate himself between Doug and his mother to protect her.
Doug reached out for her hand, but she didn’t reciprocate his squeeze. “I am, yeah.”
“You never said…” She blinked at him. “Why?”
“I didn’t think it mattered. We’re together and monogamous, so…”
Aaron shifted uncomfortably, and Mom noticed. She pulled her hand back from Doug and shook her head, the hurt not entirely gone from her eyes. “This is a conversation for another time. It’s not really the boys’ business, is it?”
“I’m sorry, Betsy.”
“It’s fine. We’ll be fine.” Mom smiled a little tightly. “What do we need to do about Carter?” She turned away from Doug in a way that made it clear she wasn’t done being hurt by his withheld information and focused on Aaron. “If he’s trying to hurt your career because you care about RJ…” She shook her head. “Why would he do that? It doesn’t make sense.” She turned back to Doug. “You think he’s gay, so why would he want to hurt his gay teacher?”
Aaron took a deep breath, and all eyes shifted to him. “He came to me the other day, right after I’d first met RJ again. There was no way he could have known about that. Anyway, he told me that day that he had a stepbrother who’d recently moved in and he wasn’t comfortable with it. At the time, I admit I was worried that the stepbrother in question was doing something inappropriate, but now that I’ve discovered it’s RJ he was referring to, and I’ve spent the last week with him, I understand there must be something else going on.”
“We probably won’t know for sure what that is unless we talk to Carter,” Doug said. “Alone. As his parents.”
Mom glanced at her watch. “The kids will be home soon, and Carter will be dropped off shortly. I think it will be best if you’re not here, Aaron, when he comes.” She pinned RJ with her eyes. “And I think it will be best if you are.”
“Why?” RJ asked.
“Won’t that embarrass him?” Doug said at the same moment.
“We can send RJ upstairs if Carter is uncomfortable talking with him around, but I think RJ should be the one to help him understand what’s happening with Aaron. And keep it PG, RJ. This is a thirteen-year-old, and he doesn’t need to understand anything other than you have feelings for his teacher. What kind of feelings can be left to his imagination.”
RJ shrugged. “I can do that.”
Doug stood and so did everyone else. He put out his hand. “Aaron, we’re grateful for you coming by to clarify things for us. We’re sorry if Carter has caused problems for you with your job.”
Aaron shook his hand firmly. “I’d like to say there’s no problem at all with my job, but truth be told, my principal is struggling with the information that I’m dating a man, much less seeing a student’s brother. Amongst other things.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. Is she fair to queer children?” Betsy asked, clearly concerned. “Should the school board be made aware?”
“She’s good with everyone but her son,” Aaron said with a grimace. “Which just happens to be me. Apparently, it’s all right for anyone else in the world to be gay, but not her kid. It’s a specific kind of bias, and one I’m aware she isn’t alone in having, and yet that doesn’t make it less painful when the kid in question is yourself.”
Mom looked as if she wanted to pull Aaron into a hug. “I’m sorry. I admit that when RJ came out to me, I didn’t handle it as well as I’d have liked—”
“You handled it great.”
“Are you kidding me? I forbid you from seeing your boyfriend.”
RJ shrugged. “He was twice my age and using me for sex. It was a good idea to forbid it. I just wish I’d obeyed.”
Mom rubbed her forehead and sighed. “You were a stubborn boy. And you’re stubborn now too.” She smiled at Aaron. “I hope you understand that my son is a bit of a pill, but a good person. He’s worth the bitterness.”
“He’s sweet to me,” Aaron said, taking RJ’s hand again. “I’m just sorry if the two of us seeing each other has made things hard for Carter. He’s a great kid. I would never want to make him uncomfortable by lov—” He flushed. “By caring for his stepbrother.”
Mom’s eyebrow popped, and RJ’s heart tripped at Aaron’s verbal slip.
“I should go now,” Aaron said. “I have some things I need to finish.”
“I’ll walk you to your car,” RJ said.
Outside, as Aaron climbed into the driver’s seat, he pulled RJ close to ask in his ear, “Later will you show me again what happens to bad elves?”
RJ kissed his cheek and whispered, “How about I show you what happens to good ones?”
Chapter Twenty-Five
“I can’t believe you had me sneaking in and out of the school like a thief,” Lauren said, slipping into the passenger seat and buckling in. She wore a pair of jeans and green shirt beneath a black cardigan. More relaxed than her usual teacher-wear.
She passed his briefcase over and a small tote of other personal odds and ends. “I’ve never gone back in after it’s been shut down for winter break. It was spooky.”
“Was she in there?”
“Yeah. In her office.”
Aaron shook his head. “She never takes a break. Even when I was a ki
d, I had to hang out in her office with her during winter break unless Dad came to get me.” Aaron groaned. “I just can’t deal with her right now.”
Lauren smiled sadly at him. “Christmas is in nine days, hon. How are you going to get around that?”
“Ugh. Don’t remind me.” He put the car in reverse and backed out of the parking space. “Thanks for getting this stuff from my classroom. Where do you want to eat?”
“Full Service sounds good to me.” Lauren pulled a lip gloss from her purse and applied it, offering some to Aaron, but he declined. “Too cold to eat at the picnic tables, of course, but I’ve been dying for their banana pudding.”
Aaron didn’t argue and turned out of the school parking lot and headed west toward the local barbecue chain. It only had a handful of outdoor picnic tables and a drive-thru window, but it was his and Lauren’s favorite spot. In the spring, summer, and autumn, they ate at the picnic tables, but in winter they’d usually find a place to park with some scenery and eat in the car. They didn’t care so long as they were with each other.
After going through the drive-thru, Aaron drove them on backroads to Concord Park, where they could watch the winter sunset skip around on the lake. Aaron relaxed into the seat, eating his sauce-covered pork and jalapeños, listening to Lauren chat about her Christmas plans with her mother. As they ate, he fielded questions about what gifts he’d gotten for his father’s side of the family and offered advice on what she should get her dad’s new wife.
Just as the Christmas lights were blinking to life on the houses around the edges of the lake, they grew quiet together. Wadding up the trash and stuffing it into the paper bag, Aaron knew the time had come for the probing. He decided to suffer it with dignity if he could.
Sure enough, as soon as Lauren had squeezed hand sanitizer onto both of their palms, she asked, “So there’s been nothing since yesterday?”
“With my mom?”
“Yeah.”
Aaron shrugged. “Nope.”
“But you’ve talked with her?”
“Uh-uh.”
The glowy, post-sunset light barely illuminated the interior of the car, but he didn’t need it to know what her expression was when she said, “Aaron…”
