Christmas in Kentbury

by Burgoa, Claudia

  She looks at her left hand and then at me. “For a moment I thought you could finally see me. A couple of weeks later Cassie arrived, and I kept being your buddy.”

  “Lee, I’m so fucking sorry,” I apologize, but the words aren’t enough.

  “You’re here because Cassie believes that you can fix everything. Dad thinks you can persuade me to go back if you say just the right words.”

  “They have nothing to do with me being here,” I assure her.

  “Bishop keeps telling me to confess my feelings so I can move on with my life,” she continues. “Well, here they are, out in the clear.”

  She pulls back her shoulders and looks me in the eyes. “I’ve been in love with you since I was fourteen. I waited for you because I thought one day, you’d see me. You’d notice me and you’d love me as much as I love you. But you don’t have to worry about me. After almost eighteen years, I’m done with this unrequited love.”

  “Lee.” I swallow hard as I realize how much pain I’ve inflicted on her, when all I’ve tried to do is protect her.

  “It’s okay, I’m a big girl,” she says dismissing me. “I made up my mind. If it’s not this job, I’ll find something else. I’m not going back. The only thing I need to have is a baby. Look at you, you’ve done well as a single dad.”

  Knightly’s a patient woman. She’s a saint when it comes to waiting for things to happen. But when she runs out of patience, she’s done. Nothing and no one will change her mind. Thank you, fucking Kingston. He pushed the right buttons to get her out of Kentbury. It’s going to take a miracle to convince her that maybe she’s been waiting since she was fourteen, but I’ve loved her for longer.

  Sure, it seems like I’m a great dad. Everyone praises my skills but none of them look closely enough to notice that my daughter’s being raised by Lee too. She doesn’t miss having a mom because she’s had Knightly her entire life. We’re a team. We’ve been a team since the first night Cassie came into our lives. And when we’re at a loss, her family is there for us.

  I’ve been so fucking scared to mess up what I have with Lee, that I didn’t do the right thing from the beginning. Moving forward, I have to be clear about my feelings, which is so fucking hard. How do I do that?

  I remember the first night with Cassie when I had no idea what to do with her. Lee said, just love her. Just show her how much she means to you. As long as she feels loved, everything else is secondary.

  It’s the same concept, right?

  “I can see why you won’t believe me.” I weave my words wisely. “Anything I say might feel hollow. You’ll think that Cassie, Steve, or your brothers pushed me to follow you and drag you back home.”

  “Didn’t they?”

  I can tell her King’s plans, and she’ll be on a plane to Kentbury to kick his ass. That won’t solve our lives.

  “I’m here for myself. Last Saturday night I had a hard time breathing when you said you were leaving. I felt as if someone was ripping my heart out of my chest. I need you by my side to feel alive. My life revolves around you and Cassie. You two are my world. Give me a week to show you I can be the man who you deserve.”

  “What does the man you deserve even mean?”

  “You’re Knightly Harris. One of the prettiest girls in Kentbury. You’re smart, went to college, and you’re the daughter of Rosalinda Kentbury—the last Kentbury. Simply, you’re unattainable.”

  Kingston and Knightly have a few things in common. Like the darkened eyes, the flaring nostrils and the twitching jaw when they get upset.

  “I’ve worked overtime to hide any emotions that you provoke. Every day, I remind myself that you’re my friend—my best friend. Overstepping would only put our relationship at risk. It’s fucking hard, but I can’t lose you. You’re too important to me.”

  “I wish I could believe you,” she says.

  “One week,” I plea. “Give me this week. If by Friday night I can’t change your mind, I’ll give up and give you what you want. A baby.”

  “You’ll give me a baby and you’ll walk away?” She squints and crosses her arms.

  “Well, kind of,” I say honestly. “I’d want to be a part of his life. I mean, fuck, Lee he’d be ours. I just can’t walk away from him, and Cassie wants a brother.” And you as her mom.

  “I’d be living in New York.”

  “Your life is in Kentbury.”

  “It was there. If I’m going to unfall in love, I have to be away from you.”

  I finally breathe. The good news is that she’s still in love with me. The bad news is that she’s making up shit. What the fuck does unfall mean? That’s not even a word.

  “One week,” I repeat, ignoring the ridiculous word she made up. “Just give me until Friday night, please. You take down those walls. We don’t hide from each other.”

  “Aren’t you afraid that afterward, things will be weird between us?”

  “Weirder than these past three days? That’s impossible,” I state and take her hand. “You’re determined to leave and move on, I have only one request. For the next week, let me show you what we can be.”

  I’m not sure if what I’m saying is romantic or even make sense. She might be wanting to hear something more heart-stopping.

  She looks at me stunned. “Five days?”

  I nod and wait. The silence stretches from seconds to maybe minutes.

  The wait feels eternal.

  Then, she tilts her head and narrows her gaze.

  “If it doesn’t work, you give me a baby?”

  I fan the booklets that they gave us at the clinic. “I would go through the entire Kamasutra for you. But I would like to explain that when you’re ready, we won’t need any fancy positions to get pregnant. I don’t drink much. I’m clean, but if you want, I can get tested.”

  I caress her face, stepping closer to her. I bend down and kiss her cheek lightly. My gaze draws to her full, parted lips pulling me to her.

  “Give me time to win your heart, Lee,” I plead my case.

  “Heath.” my name sounds like a weak gasp as I caress my mouth with hers.

  Our eyes lock, and our souls fuse.

  “This is how we’ll do it. I hand you my heart,” I whisper, our lips are so close I can feel her tremble with longing. “I’ll take care of the rest,” I finish, tasting her lips as I cup the back of her neck.

  She threads her hands through my hair.

  I kiss her gently, deeply, possessively with a fervent urge. My heart beats fast. I always knew that if I ever kissed her, it’d be like touching heaven. But the reality is beyond my wildest dreams. “Five days, please,” I ask again, resting my forehead on top of hers and trying to recover my breath.

  She doesn’t respond but gives me a slight nod. I hate that she’s not trusting me.

  Fourteen

  Knightly

  He kisses me like I’ve never been kissed before. Like his entire life depends on just this one moment. I want him to stop because his taste is intoxicating. If this continues, I’ll become addicted to it. One thing I’ve learned after all this time is that there’s no worse feeling than not knowing if I should wait or forget him.

  “Five days, please,” he insists as his forehead rests on top of mine.

  My chest is tight, and my throat feels like it’s closing in.

  It’s just anxiety, Lee, breath through it.

  Ha!

  As if it’s so easy to breathe through a major life change when one doesn’t even know what’s precisely about to change. I’d like to reset the timer, go back to Friday or Saturday and reboot them. Start anew and ignore my brothers. No, I should go back in time thirty-five years ago, and make sure that Kingston and Bishop don’t hit their heads so many times.

  This is all their fault.

  Wait, if I go back that far, I might be able to meet my mom. At the thought of my mother, I remember my sweet Cassie. How would she feel if I date her dad? If things don’t work out, she’s going to be crushed. If Heath gives me som
e of his boys and I have a baby … They can’t live apart. She’s already growing up without a mother.

  “Lee, what’s going on in that head of yours?”

  “This won’t work,” I conclude. “Have you thought about Cassie?”

  “For the next five days, it is just the two of us. We’re not going to think about Cassie, your family, or the town,” he says, grasping both my arms, gently with his hands as his light blue eyes connect with mine. “You’re afraid, I understand.”

  “Do you?” I challenge him, “Because I don’t understand myself anymore. And then there are the consequences. It’s easier if I just move away and find a new life. What you’re proposing changes the lives of a lot of people.”

  “Moving here shifts the entire landscape of Kentbury. Your departure would alter my life, who I am, and my future,” he says in a desperate tone. “I’d be hollow for the rest of my life.”

  “You’ll be fine,” I reassure him with the same words I’ve been repeating inside my head since I decided to come to New York.

  “You know that I suck at relationships. You’ve seen my role models. Both of them seem to be missing emotions and a heart. I’m afraid to lose what we have which is why I’d never dare to think beyond our friendship,” he explains in what seems a desperate attempt to convince me that what he’s done in the past is to save us. “I can’t afford to lose you.”

  “Why now?”

  “I can’t deal with the idea of not seeing you every day, of not listening to your voice or looking at your beautiful face. You have this magical power to make everyone feel special. When you’re next to me, I feel invincible.”

  “You can still lose me,” I say, skeptical about the situation and his change of heart.

  He nods. “At least a few years from now, when you visit Kentbury with your new family, I’ll be able to say I gave it my best—and I’m happy because she’s happy.”

  His words take my breath away. They’re perfect. Each one filled with sadness and yet a hint of hope.

  “This week will be one of my most cherished memories,” he concludes.

  I fight the tears, but a few escape. He clears them with his thumb and asks, “What’s the matter?”

  “What you said reminds me of Dad. He loves Mom so much he’s never moved on. When we ask him, he always says he has us. We’re the best part of the two of them. He doesn’t need more. One day, they’ll find each other in heaven where they can be together again—forever.”

  I use the long sleeves of my shirt to wipe my eyes. “That’s the kind of love that I want.”

  He takes me into his arms, rocking me from side to side. “Stay with me, Lee. Let us be whatever we’re supposed to be. Don’t fight us.”

  * * *

  Dating Heath seems like a dream. Dreams can come true, but what if I wake up in the middle of the perfect kiss and get hit by the rawness of reality? He’s just a friend.

  I want to believe in the magic of love, soul mates, and Heath Miller.

  Maybe I should, but it’s hard to believe after so many years. Heath has never let me down. I should trust him. He’s never promised more than being there for me when I need him. And he’s always there. Sun, rain, or in this case, snow.

  Five days he asked for, and when I told him I had the interview tomorrow, he wasn’t pleased. He felt like I was already giving up.

  The job interview isn’t about him. It’s about me. I don’t want to look back on my life in twenty years’ time and wonder about the things I avoided or let go because I stopped putting myself first. Like getting this job at The Ambassador. I’m going to continue the process because I want options. Or at least, I’ll show myself that I’m capable of doing more than running the B&B and the gift shop while making sure that my brothers don’t ruin our legacy.

  Heath isn’t thrilled about my decision, but he understands and supports me. Tonight, we’re going out on our first date—after I fix my hair and hopefully my nails. Once he leaves the room, I call the front desk to see if they have any appointments open at their spa and salon. While waiting for them to answer, I browse through their menu of services. I might ask for a lavender and cucumber wrap massage later this week. Thankfully, they can squeeze me in to do my hair, not my nails.

  While I’m on my way to my appointment, I text Kingston.

  Lee: We should add a spa in the resort and have Karla Olson run it.

  He doesn’t answer. I forget about him while I get pampered. We can talk about the family business next weekend. After a couple of hours, I feel like a model. It’s been too long since the last time I got a haircut, let alone have my hair done by a professional. Karla, the town’s stylist, only cuts it and sends me on my merry way home. When I reach the elevator bank there’s a noise coming from inside of my purse. My phone vibrating.

  King: She has her own salon, why would she want to do that?

  Ugh, why can’t he answer my texts when I send them.

  Lee: We’d be offering services that she doesn’t have in her salon, like massages, facials, wraps and many more. We’ll have the menu on our webpage. Pair them up with couples’ weekends at the B&B.

  King: I don’t like the idea, not for the resort. We can renovate the B&B and add a wing with a couple of extra rooms.

  Lee: We don’t touch the Victorian house—it’s a historical building.

  I huff and push the elevator button. Then I text Heath

  Lee: I’m almost ready.

  Heath: Take your time, text me when you want me to pick you up. Our reservation is at seven. Do you want to skate at Rockefeller Center tomorrow?

  Lee: Maybe, can we decide that tomorrow?

  Heath: They have a VIP service, we’d have to buy the tickets today.

  Lee: Yes, I’d love to. Maybe next time we can bring Cassie with us.

  King’s text comes right after I send the one to Heath.

  King: The spa won’t bring any new customers.

  Of course, it will. Who wouldn’t want to book a girl’s weekend in Vermont and be pampered at our state-of-the-art spa?

  Lee: We can discuss it when I’m back. It wouldn’t happen overnight, but we should start planning.

  King: You’re leaving, remember?

  Lee: Bishop, you can butt in the conversation whenever you want.

  King: He’s at Dad’s, helping him with Cassie. Let things be.

  Lee: You’re not the only one who can decide what to do with the resort. We each own a fourth of it.

  If I can convince Dad and Bishop, whatever King thinks is obsolete.

  King: More like you and Dad own a fourth and the other fifty gets to decide what we do, but we can talk about that later. I’m on a conference call.

  Lee: BISHOP did you sell your part of the resort to King?

  I swear, I’m going to kill them.

  Hops: I didn’t sell it, I exchanged it for his part of the cider mill. It’s just a ten-year deal so he could renovate it. We all win.

  Lee: You’re the only one who wins. No wonder he has no say around the orchard and the cider. What about the vineyard?

  Hops: Are we buying it? It’d be perfect to market the cider.

  Lee: We can have tours, wine tastes, and weddings. The spa would benefit from it. There’s a perfect place where we can build the spa instead of adding it to the resort.

  King: Stop, you two. We can’t afford the vineyard.

  Lee: It’s a good move, there’s so much we could do with it during the summer. You said it could happen.

  King: We can’t afford it at the moment, and I don’t think we can get a loan. The Victorian house is under your name, and the resort can’t be used as collateral.

  Lee: So we can’t add a spa, and the vineyard is a no go? I demand to see the books of the resort. I’m sure Dad would like that too.

  King: I saved the place, you have no right to demand the books because you think we’re in trouble.

  Lee: When were we in trouble?

  King: Lee, stop micromanaging. When you
come back, we can sit down and discuss everything that I had to do to renovate the place. Maybe you’ll agree to restore the B&B.

  Lee: Over my dead body, King. That’s a piece of history, leave it alone.

  When I arrive at my floor, Heath’s leaning against the door of his room with a worried, dreamy, and handsome face. My stomach becomes a big knot and the frantic race of my heart barely allows me to hear when he asks, “Are you okay?”

  The need for a kiss ceases, as I wonder, how does he know I’m not?

  My phone vibrates again, and I decide to shove it back in my purse.

  I sigh and shake my head. “As soon as I find out what King did with the resort, I’m going to kill him—and whoever helped him.”

  “You look beautiful,” he says, cupping my face and kissing my lips. “Let’s go for dinner before you start thinking about our funeral.”

  “Our?” I narrow my gaze. “Did you help him?”

  “I like to think that I helped you, not just him. We can sit down and discuss it when we’re back home. This week is all about pleasure, no business. Get ready.” He kisses my nose and leaves to his room.

  Fifteen

  Heath

  When Lee opens the door to her room every thought in my brain goes up in flames. Heat shoots through me. Gripped by raw lust. Lee’s one of the most beautiful women I’ve ever seen. Tonight, she looks even more beautiful. She’s wearing a little black dress snugged just perfect against her feminine curves. She wears a pair of four-inch heels accentuating her incredible, long, shapely legs.

  Every coherent thought flies out of my brain.

  Her hazelnut, silky hair flows over her shoulders. I want to reach out and slide my hands into it. Just for once, I don’t want to do the right thing when it comes to Lee. Instead of taking her on a date, I want to spend my time exploring her naked body. I can’t contain myself, I snake an arm around her waist and press her against my body. I bend down and take her mouth.