Mary Ball Washington

by Craig Shirley

  THE MOTHERLY ANNOYANCE FOLLOWING HIM FOR DECADES WOULD NOT GO away. It certainly did not go away in the middle of a war, and it didn’t go away in 1783, either, when there was peace.

  On January 16, 1783, when an armistice was all but official with Great Britain, George wrote to his brother John an impetuous rant about their mother, Mary. “I have lately received a letter from my Mother,” he said, “in which she complains much of the knavery of the overseer at the little falls quarter.” He went on, in a multipage tirade, in much the same way he did earlier to Benjamin Harrison. He continued, “That she can have no real wants, that may not be supplied I am sure of—imaginary wants are indefinite, & oftentimes insatiable, because they are boundless and always changing . . .

  “It will not do to touch upon this subject in a letter to her,” he concluded, before moving on to another subject, “and therefore I have avoided it.”8

  ON A BIGGER SCALE, AWAY FROM FAMILIAL TROUBLES AND DOMESTIC TRANQUILITY, the independent country now known as the United States of America, separate from the monarch and parliament of England, was struggling. “The American war is over; but this far from being the case with the American revolution. On the contrary, nothing but the first act of the drama is closed,” said Benjamin Rush, one of the signers of the Declaration of Independence, in a letter to Richard Price.

  The United States of America was not, in practice, united, nor was it intended to be.

  It was currently under the Articles of Confederation and Perpetual Union, unanimously approved by all thirteen states on March 1, 1781, at the Second Continental Congress. Thirteen articles long, this fiercely debated and ultimately failed system of government allowed a confederation of states, relatively autonomous from one another, to rule as they saw fit. It had a deliberately and, in hindsight, frustratingly decentralized rule. “The said States,” it reads, “hereby severally enter into a firm league of friendship with each other, for their common defense, the security of their liberties, and their mutual and general welfare, binding themselves to assist each other, against all force offered to, or attacks made upon them, or any of them, on account of religion, sovereignty, trade, or any other pretense whatever.”

  The congress, with one vote per state, would have the power to only declare war and war-related logistics such as appointment of military officials; sign treaties; appoint a president of the congress (who would have only a one-year term); and a handful more of routine tasks. Most important, the congress did not have the power to tax; that was up to the states, proving that the taxation-without-representation frustration a decade earlier had not waned. The Framers were acutely aware of the perils of centralized power, after suffering for so long at the hands of Parliament and King George III.

  From the start, the Articles were a doomed experiment.

  PEACE HAD ARRIVED, AND GENERAL WASHINGTON BECAME, ONCE AGAIN, Citizen Washington. He was frequently visited and adorned with honors; many of the visitors were not even American. There were a “great number of foreigners who come to see him” at Mount Vernon, wrote French ambassador Anne-César de La Luzerne in April 1784. Family, too, visited him in northern Virginia, especially his nephews and nieces and cousins.9 As much as he probably dreaded leaving his home, he knew that he needed to go back down south to see his mother.

  There were several differing accounts of George and Mary reuniting. George Washington Parke Custis specifically said they were reunited in late 1781, shortly after the siege of Yorktown.10 Custis, of course, had a knack for confusing some dates; he knew the grand scheme, but as with Mary moving to Fredericksburg during the war and not before, he too got this wrong.

  At some point, a gala known as the Peace Ball was organized to celebrate victory at the Battle of Yorktown. According to Custis, it was held on November 12, 1781. Others have said it was in December 1783 or possibly in early 1784.11 Historian David Matteson, writing in 1941, believed it inappropriate and unlikely that it was November 1781. Days before the supposed ball, George visited Martha and her dying young son, John Parke Custis, who passed away on November 5. “Would he have been likely to approve of a brilliant social occasion so soon after this bereavement?” Matteson asked.12

  More likely, if a ball happened, it happened after 1783, on a specific day in mid-February.

  George had tried for a month but was stymied with each attempt to go to Fredericksburg. “The intemperence [sic] of the weather,” in his words in a letter to Jacob Read, “has obliged me to postpone from one day to another.” He understood, though, that the visit would not be a simple greeting, but something that he was obliged to do as a son and as a local hero for Fredericksburg.13 He arrived within the day of the letter’s dating, February 12.

  While Washington was in Fredericksburg, presumably between February 12, when he arrived, and February 15, when he left, the people threw an impromptu celebration. When a courier ran over to Mary reporting of “his Excellency” soon arriving, she immediately perked up. “His Excellency!” she exclaimed, “Tell George I shall be glad to see him.”14 (Some report this story differently, with additional words from the mother. Instead of shock, it was condescending disbelief: “His Excellency! What nonsense!” she was rumored to have said. The two words surely changed the tone.)15

  That evening, the people met at the town center. Allied French and Americans all crowded around to see the special guest, George Washington, and his mother, Mary Ball Washington, as well. “The foreign officers were anxious to see the mother of their chief,” Custis recalled. “They had heard indistinct rumors touching her remarkable life and character, but forming their judgements from European examples, they were prepared to expect in the mother, that glitter and show which would have been attached to the parents of the great, in the countries of the old world.”

  Instead, Mary walked out with her son clasping her arms, heading for the center of the audience. Her advanced age required her to use him as a cane, as she leaned on him. She was not dressed in jewels or endless flowing gowns befitting royalty, but a “very plain, yet becoming garb, worn by the Virginia lady of the old time.”16 (She was known to wear unusually normal clothing for both formal and everyday occasions. Recollected Nellie Parke Custis Lewis, the sister of George Washington Parke Custis and wife to Fielding and Betty Lewis’s son Lawrence, “She was always remarkably plain in her dress—I do not believe she ever had, much less wore, a Diamond ring.”17)

  How was it possible that this elderly, mostly plain lady was the mother of the great George Washington, the French must have thought. After all, he was a hero, Father of His Country, the American Cincinnatus? Her plainness, her humility here, as she slowly walked with her son, was discordant.

  “If such are the matrons in America,” yelled one Frenchman, “well may she boast of illustrious sons!”18 Mary Terhune (who cited the ball occurring in 1781, not the likely 1784) believed that it was either Marshal Rochambeau or Admiral de Grasse.19

  The mother and son danced; both were dancers and loved the activity as shouts of praise and joyous applause echoed the chambers for continuous peace in the continent.

  By ten o’clock in the evening, while the celebrations were just starting, she looked up at her tall son, and said, quietly, “Come, George, it is time for old folks to be at home.”20

  And so she left the crowd.

  While no ball was cited in the Virginia Gazette, the citizens of Fredericksburg were certainly in awe of their former commander in chief when he visited. In a short but heartfelt letter on February 11, 1784, the mayor and citizens wrote to George Washington,21

  Sir

  While applauding millions were offering you their warmest congratulations on the blessings of Peace, and your safe return from the hazards of the Field, We The Mayor & Commonalty of the Corporation of Fredericksburg, were not wanting in Attachment and wishes to have joined in public testimonies of our Warmest gratitude & Affection, for your long and Meritorious Services in the Cause of Liberty; A Cause Sir, in which by your examples and exertions wi
th the Aid of your gallant Army, The Virtuous Citizens of this Western World, are secured in freedom and Independance. And altho: you have laid aside your Official Character we cannot Omit, this first Opportunity you have given us, of presenting with unfeigned hearts, Our Sincere Congratulations on your safe return from the Noisy Clashing of Arms, to the Calm Walks of Domestic ease; and it affords us great joy, to see you Once more at the place which claims the Honor of your growing infancy, the Seat of your venerable and Amiable Parent & Worthy Relations. We want language to express the happiness we feel on this Occasion, and which cannot be surpassed, but by Superior Acts (if possible) of the Divine Favor.

  May the great and Omnipotent Ruler of Human events, who in blessing to America hath Conducted you thro: so many dangers, continue his favor and protection, thro: the remainder of your life in the happy society of an Affectionate and gratefull people. I have the Honor to be (in behalf of the Corporation) with every sentiment of esteem & Respect Your Excellencys Most Obt & most Hble Servant

  William McWilliams

  Mayor

  Once again, Mary hosted the Marquis de Lafayette at her home. Nearly three years had passed since their last visit, and these years had aged the woman considerably. “There, sir, is my grandmother,” said one of Betty’s children to the Marquis as he entered the garden that Mary was tending.

  “Ah,” Mary replied, seeing the young Frenchman, “Marquis, you see an old woman; but come in, I can make you welcome to my poor dwelling without the parade of changing my dress.”

  And so for the second time, they met. They spoke about George, they spoke about the war, they spoke about life in America. “I am not surprised at what George has done,” Mary said in response to Lafayette’s continuous praise, “for he was always a good boy.”22

  Here, according to folklore, she baked for the Marquis her now famous gingerbread recipe. The recipe was found among other papers at Kenmore in the 1920s, calling for orange zest, orange juice, butter, sugar, molasses, and a variety of spices.23 Soon after, he was off again, departing to Mount Vernon.

  The Marquis’s admiration for the increasingly frail woman continued. “I have seen the only Roman matron living at this time,” he said to friends.24 The years went by afterward and the Marquis still asked George to give well wishes to “your respected mother” on multiple occasions, up to and including in 1788.25

  WHILE IN FREDERICKSBURG, HE OF COURSE, AGAIN, DEVOTEDLY GAVE MARY money, this time 10 guineas on February 15, which was 10 pounds, 10 shillings.26

  BEFORE GIVING HER THAT MONEY, HOWEVER, HE WAS INVITED TO DINNER with the mayor and city councilmen, around two o’clock. “Language is too weak to express the heart-felt joy that appeared in the countenances of a numerous and respectable number of Gentlemen, who had assembled on this happy occasion.” A thirteen-gun salute accompanied the dinner, each to a special toast: to the thirteen states, to the congress, to King Louis XVI of France, to the army, to the American ambassadors in Europe, to a healthy economy, and so on. It was an altogether grand spectacle.27

  George, honored, wrote in reply to the Fredericksburg people, thanking them immensely. This was his childhood town, and thus had significance to him, no matter how much he had missed Mount Vernon. In a letter dated in mid-February, addressed “to the Worshipful the Mayor and Commonality of the Corporation of Fredericksburgh [sic],” he wrote:28

  Gentlemen,

  With the greatest pleasure, I receive in the character of a private Citizen, the honor of your Address.

  To a benevolent Providence, and the fortitude of a brave and virtuous army, supported by the general exertion of our common Country, I stand indebted for the plaudits you now bestow.

  The reflection however, of having met the congratulating smiles and approbation of my Fellow-Citizens, for the part I have acted in the Cause of Liberty and Independence, cannot fail of adding pleasure to the other sweets of domestic life; and my sensibility of them is heightened by their coming from the respectable Inhabitants of the place of my growing Infancy and the honorable mention which is made of my revered Mother; by whose Maternal hand (early deprived of a Father) I was led to Manhood.

  For the expressions of personal affection & attachment, and for your kind wishes for my future Welfare, I offer grateful thanks, and my sincere prayers for the happiness and prosperity of the Corporate Town of Fredericksburg.

  Go: Washington

  Both the festivity and the letter were reprinted in the Virginia Gazette (now, in post-Revolutionary Virginia, going by its full name Virginia Gazette, or The American Advertiser, published under James Hayes from Richmond) the following week.

  The one line in particular—“The honorable mention which is made of my revered Mother; by whose Maternal hand (early deprived of a Father) I was led to Manhood”—has been quoted numerous times in early biographies as proof positive of Mary’s continuous and, more important, positive influence. Certainly the context of their relationship during this writing, the legend of the Peace Ball, and the overall atmosphere of postwar jubilating America, lent credence to that.

  That did not mean all her problems were absolved, though, nor did her son forget the headaches she gave him.

  WHEN GEORGE LEFT FREDERICKSBURG AND RETURNED TO MOUNT VERNON, he went back to business. Martha, years earlier, had agreed to raise her orphaned nephews and nieces, a move that author Ron Chernow believed made Mount Vernon seem like a “small orphanage.”29

  Soon after he arrived at home, letters went a-flying to Daniel Boinod and Alexander Gaillard, two French booksellers in Philadelphia. In them, George praised the humanities, which he said was “a duty which every good Citizen owes to his Country.” He requested several titles, all multivolume, for his personal library. All were in English, as he noted that he could not understand either the French or Latin texts available. Titles included An Account of the New Northern Archipelago, an eight-volume set by Jakob von Staehlin, on the discovery of a series of islands east of Russia and west of Alaska; The New Pocket Dictionary of the French & English Language, two volumes, by Thomas Nugent; and several other geographical and political histories of Europe.30 Clearly Washington wanted to continue his intellectual pursuit, and a revolution was not going to stop it. By the end of his life, over 1,200 titles appeared in his personal library; reading was a habit he wanted to keep.

  To Elias Boudinot, former president of the Continental Congress from November 1782 to November 1783, he wrote in reply, apologizing for the delay, as he was on “a visit to my aged Mother . . . which engaged me several days.” He admitted that the return to “a peaceful abode, & the sweets of Domestic retirement” would never be forgotten amid all the celebrations and merriment.31 He similarly wrote that same day to Elias’s sister, Annis Boudinot, whose poems about the general resonated with him deeply: “It would be a pity indeed, My dear Madam, if the Muses should be restrained in you,” he said.32

  OTHERS WHO PASSED THROUGH OR JUST LIVED IN FREDERICKSBURG WOULD have seen her frequently. Her age alone—by 1783, an elderly seventy-five, especially for that time—would have solicited excitement at greeting the mother of America’s greatest hero. One such man, neighbor William Simmes, described her in mid-1783 as “equally active & sprightly” as her daughter Betty. “She goes about the neighborhood to visit our quality on foot, with a cane in her hand & sometimes a Negro girl walking behind her in case of necessity.”

  He continued, that she “talks of George without the least pride or vanity. She will not keep any carriage, but a chair and two old family horses. . . . The front windows [of her house] are always shut & barred—for she delights to live in a little back room or two where I have seen her sitting at work with a slave to attend her—such is her taste.”33

  Still others recalled her with a distinct straw hat and red cloak—perhaps the same cloak her son had bought her decades earlier. If she had been tall like her son, her age made her shrink in size, a cane becoming more and more necessary as she hunched over.

  And life continued on
for her.

  LEAVING THE TRANQUILITY OF MOUNT VERNON BEHIND, WASHINGTON made more trips to Fredericksburg again in 1785 and 1786. On April 29, 1785, the barometer read the air pressure in the mid-seventies with storms to the east, with “not very warm” weather. While heading to Richmond to assist the Dismal Swamp Company, which was managing and draining the Great Dismal Swamp in southern Virginia and northern North Carolina, Washington of course stopped for the night at Fredericksburg. He did not stay with his mother, instead sleeping at Kenmore, but before greeting his widowed sister, he paid a particular stop to Mary. He then went off the next day, dining with Alexander Spotswood, the husband of his half brother’s daughter, in Spotsylvania County.34

  ON MAY 1, GEORGE REACHED RICHMOND AND, THE NEXT DAY, HE DRAFTED resolutions to help jump-start the Dismal Swamp Company he had founded over two decades earlier. Only one page of their resolutions existed, but Washington, and others, agreed that the money raised could be put to better use: “Be put into the hands of some proper person, and such person be empowered to engage as many German, or other labourers at Baltimore, or any other part of this continent, as the money will procure.” If it failed, then slaves—thought to be inferior in skill to the German or “Dutch” laborers—were to be used.35

  When returning home after business was finished in Richmond, he again stopped by his mother’s and sister’s. He dined with Betty and “spent half an hour” with Mary before heading off, where he slept in a tavern near Stafford Courthouse in northern Virginia. No word was written on Mary’s or Betty’s conditions.36

  MOUNT VERNON WAS PERHAPS NOT AS BUSTLING IN PRODUCTION AS HE wanted, but it was still a plantation to befit a Virginia gentleman. He had at least 216 slaves on his various properties, including at Mount Vernon, ranging from children to the elderly. The slave children alone numbered ninety-six. Here were waiters, housemaids, seamstresses, “almost blind” spinners. Among the most reliable was Billy Lee, also known as Will, his valet de chambre, whom George purchased in 1768 for over 61 pounds. Later that year, he acquired more by rent from a certain Mrs. Penelope French, and by the time of his death in 1799, he owned 317 men, women, and children.37 More were owned through either indentured servitude or leased from neighbors.