From the Top (Central State)

by Jaqueline Snowe

  I undid my bra, sliding it through my armhole, and tossed it up. First try, I missed. But the second…it landed near his feet.

  Feeling daring and excited from all the adrenaline, I removed my shirt and sat on the chair with my feet on the table. I stretched my arms above my head, thrusting my breasts out. A part of me would always be wild, and I hoped Freddie liked that little streak.

  He shifted in his chair, his head peeking over the railing. “Cami.”

  “Hey, upstairs neighbor.”

  “What are you doing?” His voice cracked, and his gaze stayed on my tits. Hot and intense. “Your shirt!”

  “I seemed to have lost it. Want to help me find it?”

  He licked his bottom lip and then he was out of sight. Maybe I imagined it, but I swore I heard heavy stomps from the ceiling above me. I couldn’t stop smiling at the possessive face he’d made and how we were floor neighbors.

  Freddie was so worried about not sharing a wall with me, but look at us now. I had no idea he was right above me. Our units didn’t match in number or letter, so this was a fun coincidence.

  Bam, bam, bam.

  I pushed myself up, still shirtless, and opened the front door. “Oh, hello.” I wiggled my brows as he barged inside. He wore a dark black shirt and ripped jeans, the fabric stretching across his body in a marvelous way.

  “You little tease.” He backed me up against a wall and held my hands above my head. His chest heaved as he took his time eyeing my face, neck, and breasts. My nipples were pointed out toward him, hungry for his mouth, but he didn’t touch me.

  He just looked and stared.

  “Tell me, Cami.” He nipped my neck.

  Heat flooded between my thighs, and I slammed my head against the wall in pleasure. “Hm?”

  “Do you enjoy flashing your tits for everyone to see? Does it turn you on?” He sucked my earlobe for a second before dragging his nose over my collarbone. I straight-up whimpered now.

  Freddie unhinged was my second favorite Freddie.

  “What if I said yes?”

  He snapped his head back, his gaze dropping to my mouth as his lips parted. His jaw went slack, and he carefully set my arms down. Without warning, he hoisted me up and brought me closer toward the patio door.

  “Does the thought of someone seeing you naked get you hot?” He captured my hands again, this time holding them behind my back.

  “A little, yes.”

  “Liar. It does a lot.” He finally bent down and sucked one nipple into his mouth in a hungry kiss. I bucked against it, loving how his jaw rubbed on my skin. “Is this what you hoped would happen when you threw me your bra?”

  “Maybe.”

  “Mm.” He sucked my other nipple harder, humming against my sensitive flesh. My body was amped up, an orgasm just seconds away.

  He stopped sucking and pulled my thin bra out of his pocket. He wrapped it around my hands and pushed my arms above my head again. “Don’t move them.”

  Holy shit.

  I was going to combust. Freddie. Soft, sweet Freddie basically handcuffed me with my bra. It was so fucking hot.

  He cupped my neck and seared me with a white-hot kiss before he spun me around so my nipples pressed against the glass. I shook with a desperate need. Every fantasy I ever had…this was so much better. “Freddie.” My voice cracked.

  He slid my athletic shorts and panties down. Then he spread my legs apart and ran his fingers through my slit. “So wet for me.”

  My ears buzzed, and my pussy ached from all the sensations. The cold window on my nipples, the clean woodsy scent he brought with him. He kissed the back of my neck before he spread my ass cheeks. I whimpered as he kneaded my globes.

  “Someday, I want to taste you there.”

  “O-okay.” I panted and could barely stand up. “Please, I want—”

  “You’re waiting this out, baby. You teased me with your perfect tits. Your fucking body is a dream. Your strong muscles. God, I want to bite them.” Something shuffled, and he bit my thigh.

  “Oh, shit.” My hands slipped on the glass, and he righted them.

  “When I’m with you, I want to do everything with you. It’s addicting. You’re addicting.”

  Something soft thudded on the ground. Then a buckle. Something warm pressed against my back, and Freddie moved his hand around my front to play with my clit. “I want you to come like this, against your window so anyone could see.”

  Who was my boyfriend?

  He swirled his fingers around my swollen nerves, fast, hard. Like he knew it would only take seconds. His other hand held my stomach, and he sucked hard on my neck. “I fucking love your body.”

  I fucking love you, I wanted to say. How could I not? Look at the shy guy doing dirty and crazy things for me. I held those words in just as the orgasm started at my core. The pleasure exploded through my veins, making me cry out in a scream. He kept massaging my clit, holding me against him as I rode it out.

  “That’s my girl,” he kept saying. Each time had me falling for him a bit more.

  When the pleasure subsided, my arms fell, and he undid the restraint. He spun me around, lifted my chin, and assessed me. “Are you okay? Was that too much? I lost my mind—”

  “It was perfect.” I smashed my lips against his, jumping onto his body, hungry for more. “You’re perfect.”

  He laughed against my mouth and walked us toward the couch before pulling me onto his lap. I knew just what to do. How to even the score, how to repay the favor of letting me be wild.

  He moaned in protest when I slid off him and went to grab my bra. His gaze trailed my every move as his chest heaved. “What are you doing?”

  “Returning the pleasure, big guy.” I flashed my best smile and motioned for him to lift his arms. He held them above his head, and I tied the fabric around them. “No touching.”

  “How’s that fair?” He pouted. His glasses almost fogged up, and I took them off. “No, leave them. I want to see every inch of you, Cami.”

  I could feel the truth of his words too. I placed them back on his nose, letting my nipple graze the outside of his lips. I arched back before he captured it, and he hissed. “See? Isn’t this fun?”

  “You’re killing me.”

  I moved between his thighs and dragged off his boxers and jeans. His massive, thick cock slapped against his stomach, and I clenched my thighs. My turn. I licked the shaft, base to the top, took him into my mouth, and sucked.

  He almost erupted from the couch. “Cami! Fuck.”

  I pushed him back down and swirled my tongue around him. He shook when I cupped his balls. I wanted him to feel even a small amount of the pleasure I did earlier. The build-up was just as important as the release, and I needed him to feel it all.

  “I love having you in my mouth.” I found a rhythm he liked and noted all his reactions. The way his muscles flexed, the groans escaping from his mouth. The heavy breaths. Sweat formed on his stomach, and I rubbed my hand over it.

  “Cami, stop, I’m gonna come.”

  I stopped. “Don’t you want to?”

  “With you, not like this.” His face softened, and something shifted. My own heart beat erratically against my ribs, and suddenly, I couldn’t get close enough to him. I crawled up his body, undoing the bra from his hands and kissed him.

  He cupped the back of my head, slowly thrusting his tongue into my mouth as he trembled. He held me like he loved me, all close and intimate. I mirrored the embrace, and instead of a roaring fire of lust, an emotional need filled me.

  “I want to feel you, all of you.” I pulled back just to meet his eyes. “I’m clean and on the pill.”

  His eyes searched mine. “I’m clean too.”

  Then, he lifted my hips and rested his cock at my entrance. He waited for me to finish the connection, and I slid onto him. God, he felt good. He held my gaze as I slowly arched my hips. He gripped my sides, urging me to go even slower.

  We’d had sex a lot since that first night, but
nothing had felt like this. Each movement was slow, deliberate. He ran a hand down my neck and over my chest until it rested over my heart. My breath caught in my throat at his tender expression.

  “Freddie,” I said, my voice breaking from the onslaught of everything.

  “I know, baby.” He kissed me again, our heavy breathing matching the pace of me riding him.

  We stayed like that forever, his mouth on mine and his cock filling me up. But after a while, a hot tingle teased in my lower gut. He sensed it too because he reached between my legs and rubbed my clit, somehow not breaking our kiss. “Come for me again.”

  I arched my back, took him deeper, and oh my god. It was the best orgasm I’d ever had, making the top of my head tingle with pleasure. I barely caught my breath before Freddie’s movements became jerky. Tight. He kneaded my ass as his face twisted. “Fuck.”

  He spilled into me, his eyes never leaving mine. I’d never had sex with anyone without a condom and the sensation—the closeness I felt to him, was unparalleled. “Whoa.”

  I giggled, moving off him and collapsing on the couch. He sat there, legs spread, eyes wild, and chest heaving, and I couldn’t imagine not being with him. “Freddie, this is the hottest thing I’ve ever experienced.”

  “Yeah?” He gave me a lazy grin. “Me too.”

  “That wasn’t… too wild for you?”

  His face tightened with understanding before his eyes warmed. “You make me want to try everything. So no, this wasn’t too wild for me. Nothing is when I’m with you.”

  My face heated, and I scooted closer to kiss him again. The words were right there, but I couldn’t say them. Not yet. “I’m having a party tonight with the dance girls. We’re celebrating the fact my dad will be our temporary coach.”

  “No way!” He pulled me into his arms, his chest still sweaty.

  I didn’t care though.

  “Yeah, how fun is that? Anyway, do you want to come over? It’ll probably be a lot of music, dancing, and beer pong.”

  “Are you sure you don’t need to bond with just the team? I don’t mind.”

  “Meet my team.” Damn, nerves hit me out of nowhere. After all that we did, now I got nervous. “If you want.”

  He seemed to read me though. He nodded in understanding. “I’d love to meet the other part of your life. Of course I’ll come.”

  CHAPTER

  TWENTY-FOUR

  Freddie

  Dad: Today’s the day, son! You’ll be working with your Uncle Martin soon enough. Proud of you. Can’t wait to stop by for lunches twice a week!

  I pressed my palms into my eyes, not responding to my dad. He meant well, I knew that, but each text or call just made the guilt more painful. Like he couldn’t fathom the fact that maybe… I didn’t want to work with Uncle Martin. That maybe staying in town was a better choice for me.

  Because of Cami.

  My computer hissed from overheating, and my jaw tightened at the forced restart. My knee hit the table over and over, causing my coffee to spill over my mug. Damnit. The text on my phone read YOUR STATUS FOR INTERNSHIP IS UPDATED. CHECK PORTAL.

  Check the fucking portal? I’d love to if my laptop would function. I rubbed the back of my neck as my future waited until the damn device would work. I’d find out if I got into the local businesses or if I’d have to move to the city with my uncle.

  Moving hours away. My stomach ached.

  Camden would give me shit for worrying about something before it happened, but I was that kinda person—imagining all the ways it could go wrong before it did. I cracked my knuckles as my laptop finally started, and then I typed the incorrect passwords three times in my hurry to log in.

  Finally. The portal loaded.

  Urbana Associates: Declined

  Urbana LLC: Accepted, Pending

  Chicago Associates: Accepted

  Chicago LLC: Declined

  Northern Chicago: Declined

  My pulse flooded my ears at the Accepted, Pending. What did that even mean? I clicked the more information button and scanned the small font. Acceptance pending paperwork.

  What paperwork?

  I researched immediately what that meant. It seemed there could be a delay in a form or application—which, phew.

  Pending… that signified there was still a chance, and it wasn’t a no. If it was a no, that meant I had to move to Chicago with my uncle. I gulped, hating the unfairness of it all. I was excited for the internship, looking forward to learning more and applying my skills to be a legit environmental engineer. If Cami wasn’t in the picture, I’d be thrilled I got into Chicago Associates and working close to my dad. I grew up hearing about all the lunches and networking they did in the city. My future always ended there, in the city with them. Plus, they had a great reputation and would pave the way for more opportunities.

  But Urbana LLC…that was in town. Nearby. I’d still get to see Cami and Camden and Michael…I lied to myself. I’d miss my brother and friends, but it was her that came to the forefront of my mind. I loved her. Some would say it was too soon, but I knew what love felt like, and this was so much more than what I had with Maddie. There was trust and a vulnerability in the way we communicated.

  When I thought about the future a year from now, I pictured Cami with me. It was that simple. But would she be with me if I moved hours away so soon? Before we had a chance to see if we could survive it?

  My fingers tapped against my thigh, and I paced the living room. Cami was sitting in on interviews with Daniella for a new dance coach, and Camden was with his current fling. I needed to talk to someone about what was going on in my mind. My dad gave great advice, even if he always pictured me working for his brother. He’d be able to give me an unbiased opinion. Content with my decision, I called him.

  “Hey, son.”

  “Got a minute?”

  “Sure thing.” He shuffled some papers around. “Your mom and I are looking forward to parents’ weekend in two weeks. We already got our outfits and everything.”

  I fought a smile. They were so dorky, but I appreciated their effort. They cared about us and went all in. Also, Camden hated their school spirit, so it made the whole weekend more enjoyable for me. “Can’t wait.”

  “But more importantly… Martin already texted me the good news! You’re in, Freds! You’re gonna be working in the city like we always talked about!”

  “Right, yeah.” My throat closed up tight, making me sound like a dehydrated frog. “About that.”

  “What about it? Were you nervous you wouldn’t get in? Come on, Martin thinks the world of you. He already told his staff about all the innovative ideas you’d bring and how including the next generation in projects is the way to go.”

  God, the pride in my dad’s voice almost broke my resolve. How could I disappoint him? Uncle Martin? My mom? I could almost hear the displeasure in his voice, the change of how he used vowels if I didn’t take the one in the city.

  “You think you’ll live at home or get a place? I keep telling your mom to not ask you, but since I have you on the phone…” he paused, clearly waiting for me to respond. My poor brain started fritzing.

  “I’m seeing someone,” I blurted out, awkward and unsure. Dad and I didn’t have relationship talks besides the whole wear a condom speech I got in junior high. Plus, they’d really disliked Maddie. “It’s… intense.”

  “Okay.” He swallowed, and silence greeted me for a few seconds. “That’s great, Freddie. I can’t wait to meet her.”

  That made me smile. Cami would love my parents, but I refocused. The October air chilled a little, and I slid the patio door open, letting the breeze cool me off. Ask him. Do it. “It’s about my internship.”

  “What about it? Did you not get accepted? I’ll kill Martin.”

  “No, no. I got into Chicago Associates.” I cleared my throat. “And one here in Urbana pending paperwork.”

  “See? Two places saw your potential. That’s great, son. It’ll be hard to tell Urbana n
o since it’s your college town, but just think of the city! All the Cubs games, the food, the movie festivals? It’s your dream come true.”

  Is it though? Or yours? I wouldn’t dare say the words.

  “I’m worried about what to do.”

  “About what? The woman you’re seeing?” His voice was laced with apprehension.

  “If it weren’t for Cami, I’d be thrilled for the Chicago acceptance.” While I loved her, a small, tiny part of me wanted to preserve my heart. The what if she changed her mind part of my brain was getting smaller and smaller each day we were together, but was I being a total idiot to turn down an internship in Chicago after being with her for a month?

  “Hmm, well.” He took a sip of water, the sounds coming through the phone. “This thing with Cami…it’s new and exciting. I’m happy for you. You deserve all the love and happiness after what Maddie put you through, but I’d be a fool to not advise you to put yourself first. You always worry about others—Maddie, your brother. You bent over backwards for that girl, and she played you like a fool. If you think Cami’s worth it … distance for a few months won’t kill you.”

  “Meaning I should take the Chicago internship?”

  He sighed, the sound weighing me down with guilt. “Freddie, of course you’ll take this one. It’s a huge opportunity for your career, your future. You’ve worked so hard the past five years. Don’t throw it away because you’re seeing someone new. Choose yourself first.”

  Doubt still plagued me. I did always worry about others and catered to them. I didn’t mind being that guy, but could I let it compromise my future? Five years in college and my final semester? I sighed, closing my eyes as the sun warmed my face. “I have two weeks to choose.”

  “We’ll celebrate when we’re there in a few weekends and we can get your head on straight. Working with Martin was what you always wanted, kid. Don’t let a temporary distraction ruin your future for you. I say that with love. Remember that.”

  “Sure, yeah, bye, Dad.”

  We hung up and pocketed my phone. Fuck. That didn’t help at all. He couldn’t even fathom a reality where I chose staying here. Why couldn’t this year be normal so I could spend it with her without worrying? Moving from the dorms to the apartments had made me nervous, and the thought of living three hours away?