by A. K. Evans
I sat down on the couch and began pulling on my socks. When I got the second one over my heel, I heard footsteps on the metal bridge walkway that led from the main path—the main path ran in front of the village of homes at the summit of the mountain—to the front door to the house we were staying in.
My body froze.
I couldn’t move.
Maybe Ryder had been right. Maybe Marley had simply gone to the lodge to get something to eat before she came back here. Maybe I’d been panicking for nothing.
And if that was the case, if I had made up some crazy scenario in my head about something happening to her because she wasn’t back here at the time that I thought she would be, it became clear to me that I needed to do something about this situation between us.
Marley was important to me. And I know that I was important to her. Or, at least, I knew that there was a time in her life when I was important to her. So, this needed to be fixed by any means necessary.
I’d give her some time. Let her come in and unwind, but then we’d need to talk. We needed to get back to… I didn’t know where we needed to get back to. But things couldn’t remain this way. It was clearly taking its toll on me, and based on Marley’s reaction to me yesterday, this had taken its toll on her.
We needed to get it out in the open, and we both needed to heal from this. Or, at the very least, we needed to clear the air and come to some sort of mutual understanding. If nothing else, I needed her to know that I held no grudge against her. I wanted her to know that I still cared about her more than probably made sense, given the current state of our relationship.
Seconds later, I heard the code being entered. I relaxed only slightly but didn’t move myself from where I was still sitting motionless on the couch.
I just needed to see her.
I’d get one look at her, confirm with my own eyes that she was okay, and then I’d grab my phone so I could go downstairs and let Ryder know she was back safely.
But no matter how much I planned for what I would do the moment she walked inside, none of it came to fruition. Because when the door opened, nothing went as I had anticipated.
I expected Marley to walk in, take off her gear, and go about her business. That wasn’t what happened.
The door opened, then she stepped inside and leaned her board up against the wall. A moment later, she sat down on the bench. I thought she was going to bend over to remove her boots and leave them on the drying rack.
She didn’t.
And because I hadn’t moved or said a word and the lights in the main space were dimmed, she never realized I was there watching her. She had probably assumed I was downstairs in the bedroom.
Marley buried her face in her hands and started crying.
Any of the astounding relief I felt at seeing her walk through that door in one piece had flown right out the window.
Something wasn’t right.
Something was very, very wrong.
For longer than I should have, I sat there and listened to Marley’s quiet sobs. It was clear to me that she was overwhelmed by something that had happened while also trying to prevent me from knowing anything about it.
I didn’t know what was going to happen, but there was no way I could continue to see her like that and not doing something about it.
Fully aware of the fact that she might scream at me and tell me to get away from her, I quietly got up and moved her way. She had no idea I was here, that I was approaching her with caution in every step that brought me closer to her.
Finally, when I was only a matter of two or three feet away, I called gently, “Marley?”
She immediately tensed and pulled her hands from her face.
The moment she tipped her chin up, and I saw the horrified look in her eyes, I couldn’t hold myself back. I sat down beside her and pulled her into my arms.
Surprisingly, she didn’t put up a fight.
I held on tightly to her, rocking back and forth ever so slightly, and promised, “It’s okay. I’ve got you.”
Not even a second later, Marley’s body relaxed. If there had been a fight brewing inside of her, it vanished. She slid her arms around my waist and allowed her body to melt into mine as she continued to pour her emotions out all over my chest.
And for the very first time in fifteen years, I finally felt whole again.
Six
Mack
It took a long while for Marley to settle down.
I didn’t loosen my hold on her even once. As much as I wanted answers, as much as I needed to know what happened to her, I was far more concerned with giving her the comfort she clearly needed in that moment even more.
So, I waited.
I waited and held on and did my best to provide her with that comfort. It wasn’t as though it was a hardship. I hadn’t been this close to Marley in years, so I was going to embrace this opportunity and hold on to her for as long as she would allow me to do it.
I just never expected she’d need it for so long.
And that completely wrecked me inside.
It also proved to me that no matter how hard I’d insisted that I wanted nothing to do with her, it was all a lie. The simple fact remained that she was always going to be Marley, the girl who grew up across the street from me and became my best friend. Time and space would never change what she meant to me. I’d always care for her no matter where our lives took us.
My only hope now was that whatever put her in my arms today would be the start of a new beginning for us.
I wasn’t sure how much time had passed before Marley eventually loosened her hold on me and pulled back.
“I’m… I’m sorry,” she apologized, her voice tight and raspy.
“Marley, there’s nothing to apologize for,” I insisted. “All I want is to know what happened and that you’re okay.”
Her shoulders fell as she looked away. “I guess I’m okay in the physical sense now,” she began quietly. “But I thought I was going to be trapped on the mountain and freeze to death tonight.”
“Why?” I questioned her.
Marley lifted her gaze and didn’t hesitate to explain, “I went off the main trail and into the powder field this afternoon. I’d been watching people do it all day long and thought I could handle it.”
“I know you saw me when I got off that lift,” I said.
“Yeah,” she murmured, looking away from me once more.
Not wanting her to feel any sort of remorse for it, I added, “I watched you go off the trail, and you did amazing. I was really proud of you.”
“Really?” she asked, bringing her attention back to me.
Nodding, I confirmed, “Yes.”
Something changed in her expression briefly before she looked away again and murmured, “Yeah, well, I ended up doing not so hot, eventually. There were too many trees, and I started to panic a little, so I scrubbed my speed. When I did, I…”
“You sank,” I chimed in.
Marley nodded. “I didn’t think it would be so bad,” she rasped. “And by the time it happened, I’d gotten so far away from the main trail that I had so much snow to trudge through. It was so hard and exhausting and terrifying. I didn’t think I was going to make it to the lift on time.”
“You did, though, right?” I asked.
“Just barely,” she answered.
I could only imagine how much she must have struggled to get to that lift.
Getting stuck was not good, and it was almost impossible to get back on the board and get going again once you were in powder like that. I could remember explaining to Marley what she’d need to do to get out if that ever happened to her.
Essentially, it was a matter of digging herself out to get her board off her feet. Then, she’d need to take the board in her hands and use that for leverage on the top of the snow while basically hoping to crawl her way to a spot where she wouldn’t sink.
If it was up to her chest when she sank in, it was no wonder she seemed so exhausted.
<
br /> Now that she was here, though, something struck me. “Wait a minute,” I started. “If you got to the lift on time, why are you just now getting back here? Did something else happen?”
Marley shook her head. “Not really. I just… I was so exhausted that I knew I wouldn’t be able to ride down that last trail to come back here. I had just enough energy to get myself into the lodge there. I really needed some time to sit down, warm up, and try to gain some strength back.”
“Did it help?”
“No. Honestly, I could have fallen asleep there if they hadn’t told me the lodge was closing,” she shared. “I ended up having to leave, and I still didn’t have it in me to ride back. So, I sat there, strapped onto my board, at the top of that trail until I felt I could make it back. I took it easy on the way down, but once I got to the end and had to unstrap, I really started to feel it. I still do. Everything hurts, and each step I took to get back here was agonizing.”
I felt awful.
I should have stuck around and waited for her at that lift when I’d seen her go off the trail. Even if she would have ended up in the same position, at least she wouldn’t have been alone.
Without saying another word, I got off the bench and crouched down in front of her. I immediately went to work on her boots. I guess she could have kicked me in the face just then if she wanted to, but I didn’t care. This moment was too important. I wasn’t going to miss the opportunity to build on what just happened between us.
Marley and I had had our first conversation in years. And while the subject didn’t exactly make me feel good—I hated knowing how scared she had been—the fact that we were speaking to one another without any of the tension or awkwardness was all that mattered to me.
“You don’t have to—” she got out before I cut her off.
“I know,” I insisted, my focus remaining on her boots. “But I want to.”
When I got them off her feet, I shifted my attention to her hands that were resting on her thighs. I took one in my hands and pulled off her glove. Then I did the same with the other. It wasn’t until I finished that I finally brought my attention to her face.
“Mack, I’m really sorry about the way I reacted yesterday,” she apologized.
I wanted to crumble to the floor after hearing her say my name again for the first time in all these years, but I didn’t. I needed to stay focused so I could get us back on track.
Shaking my head, quickly brushing off all that I was feeling as I stood up, I replied, “We don’t need to talk about any of that right now. You’ve had a rough day.” Holding my hand out to her, I urged, “Let’s get these wet layers off you.”
Marley tentatively placed her hand in mine and stood. I helped her get her jacket off, and as I moved to hang it up, she began pulling off her bibs. When she stepped out of them, I took them from her and hung those up, too.
Then it was just the two of us, standing there together in silence, wearing nothing but our base layers. I struggled to keep my gaze on her face.
Marley had curves in all the right places, and I wanted to be able to appreciate them now. But more than that, I wanted to repair what was broken between us. So, I ignored my natural instincts and the overwhelming urge to check her out and instead asked, “How about we get you over on that couch in front of the fireplace so you can start warming up while I make a phone call?”
She dipped her chin slowly in agreement. Since I was unsure how weak she felt, I took one of her hands in mine and placed the other at the small of her back so I could guide her safely to the couch. After she sat down, I pulled a blanket out and placed it over her.
“I just need to call Ryder quickly,” I told her. “Give me a minute.”
Something strange and uneasy washed over her, but she didn’t share what was wrong. Marley simply whispered, “Okay.”
Swiping my phone off the counter, I pulled up Ryder’s contact and tapped on the screen.
“Any word?” he greeted me.
“She’s here. She’s safe,” I shared.
A rush of air left his lungs. “Thank God. Did she get hurt or was she just hanging in the lodge to avoid you?”
I didn’t want to get into all the details of this with Marley sitting right here, but I wanted to give Ryder some reassurances. “It was what I thought it was,” I explained. “I’ll call you tomorrow, though.”
“She’s there listening, isn’t she?” he asked.
I let out a laugh. “Yeah.”
“Okay. Well, thanks for letting me know that she’s safe. I’ll talk to you tomorrow,” he replied.
Ryder and I said goodbye before we disconnected.
Not wanting to waste a minute, I walked back over to where Marley was sitting and asked, “If I make dinner for us, will you eat with me?”
“Were you talking to Ryder about me?” she asked in response.
I nodded. “Yes.”
The silence stretched between us as she took my confirmation in. At that moment, I had to wonder how much of my conversation she heard yesterday. Did she know that it was Ryder I’d been talking to then?
I got caught up in the questions that moved through my thoughts, so I completely forgot that I’d asked her another question. It wasn’t until Marley spoke and interrupted those thoughts that I remembered I had indicated I was going to make dinner.
“What are you planning to cook?” she asked.
She wasn’t saying no.
Holy shit.
Marley wasn’t saying no to having dinner with me.
I swallowed hard and thought quickly. “Well, I was thinking that with all the calories burned out on the mountain today, it might make sense to have a high-carb meal. Are you good with some pasta?”
A small smile formed on her face, and my heart pounded in my chest. In that moment, something told me we were going to be okay. It might take us some time, but Marley and I would get back to where we used to be.
“Yeah. That sounds good. Do you want me to help?” she offered.
I shook my head. “In any other situation, I’d take you up on that in a heartbeat. Not today. I’ve got it. I’d prefer that you just relax and warm up.”
“Alright,” she agreed.
As I walked back out toward the kitchen to start preparing the food, I decided it would be a good idea to clear up any of the concerns Marley might have had with regard to my phone call with Ryder.
“I was worried,” I called out.
Curled up in the blanket, Marley looked over the back of the couch at me. “Worried?” she repeated.
“That’s why I called Ryder,” I confessed, pulling out a pot and filling it with water. “I knew what time the lifts closed, and when too much time passed and you hadn’t returned, I started to panic.”
I paused a moment as I carried the pot over to the stove and turned it on. Once it was on, I pulled out the store-bought pasta sauce and dumped that into another pot.
As I waited for the water to boil, I moved to the refrigerator and pulled out the romaine lettuce. Then I continued, “I called Ryder to ask him to call you. I didn’t want to upset you by reaching out to you myself, especially if everything was fine, but I needed to know that you were safe. When he called you and you didn’t answer, I got even more upset. I actually told him that I was worried something happened when you went off the trail. And mere minutes before you walked through the front door, I had just gotten off the phone with him and made the decision that I was going to go look for you. I didn’t even have both socks on before I heard you walking across the metal walkway.”
The only sound in the house was that of me chopping the lettuce. For a long time, that was all it was until Marley finally said, “I’m sorry to have worried you, Mack. I really am.”
I looked up at her briefly and replied, “I don’t think I could ever communicate how relieved I am to see you sitting here. I’m beyond grateful that you’re okay.”
“Yeah. Me, too,” she agreed. “Is everything okay with Ryder?”
“Did you hear about Easton, Faye, and Beth?” Marley asked.
At that question and the bit of information that Marley had shared, my body went solid. It wasn’t because I didn’t know what had happened to our other friends. I did. It was all because I hadn’t expected Marley to talk to me about it.
What happened tonight and the phone call I made to Ryder all seemed like reasonable conversation for the two of us to have. Marley making conversation, unrelated to that or anything else, was completely out of the blue.
I wasn’t upset by it.
I loved it.
By it caught me completely off guard.
“I did,” I rasped before immediately cleared my throat. “They got stuck on the highway behind a massive pile-up.”
I hoped Marley didn’t realize how much it was affecting me to have a normal conversation with her like this.
Needing to know, I took a chance and looked up at her. Marley’s body was still twisted on the couch so she could look over the back of it. Only, she wasn’t looking at me. Her head was down, and her cheek was resting on the top of the cushion. Her eyes were closed.
“Are you sleeping?” I asked quietly.
Marley didn’t respond.
All I could do was smile and feel warmth move through me. I had loved the idea of talking to her about ordinary things, but this wasn’t so bad either. Knowing that she wasn’t on edge around me, that she wasn’t glaring at me or sneering, but instead felt relaxed enough to close her eyes and allow herself to drift.
I decided to let her rest while I made her some dinner. There was no doubt she’d been through something that had not only been brutal and exhausting but also incredibly traumatic. I couldn’t imagine how terrified she must have felt using all her effort to get out of the deep snow and wondering if she’d make it to the lift before it closed.
As much as I hated knowing that she’d gone through all of that today, part of me felt guilty for feeling grateful it happened.
