Cruise Ship Cozy Mysteries 05 - Cruise Conundrum

by A. R. Winters

  Xavier nodded. “Yes, you were my queen and I was a king, and all our subjects adored us.”

  Zara happily agreed with this, and this time, I caught Andy trying not to roll his eyes.

  I didn’t think he would be perceptive enough to realize that listening to them was like listening to a milder version of him.

  “Right. Perhaps we should go inside.” I’d had enough of this love fest. “I’ll show you how the projector works, Andy.”

  As I started to walk inside, I could hear Andy snickering.

  “As if someone like me doesn’t know how to use a projector...”

  Three sets of laughter rang behind me as I led them to the auditorium.

  My happy predictions about this cruise that I’d had the day before now seemed an awfully long way away.

  Still, it was only a week.

  But a week could feel like an eternity on a cruise ship.

  Chapter 7

  I enjoyed Andy’s presence a lot more when there were several dozen other people in the room and he was up on the stage. He was a charismatic speaker, though seeing how much everyone seemed to love him still made him grate a little.

  Feeling more self-conscious than usual, I took a bunch of pictures of him up on the stage and some of our attendees, all with expensive cameras dangling from their necks. Every time I clicked the little camera icon on the screen, I imagined Andy judging the quality of my pictures and finding them wanting.

  Whatever.

  He would be gone soon, and anyway, almost everyone else liked the pictures I took during the cruises. I usually got so many nice comments from guests that I knew there was no point in worrying about what Andy thought of my pictures. But knowing I shouldn’t care and making myself truly not care where two very different things.

  With a few dozen pictures and Andy starting to get into the technical aspects of his talk, I figured it was time for a well-deserved break.

  It wasn’t really a break I was after though; I wanted some company. After my disappointing breakfast with Ethan, and then being insulted and belittled by Not Awesome Andy, I needed a pick-me-up.

  Sam was managing the rest of this presentation, so that only left Cece. She would of course be working, but as a housekeeper she worked alone. I knew that if I offered to help her, she’d welcome my intrusion.

  I typed a quick message on my phone: Where are you? Want some help?

  Her reply came back almost immediately: VIP 312. Gloves waiting for you :)

  I smiled at the quick response. At least my friends appreciated me. After one final photo of the auditorium, I left the room, immediately feeling like a burden had been lifted from my shoulders as soon as I got outside.

  While Cece’s job was one of the least glamorous ones on the ship, it had a certain appeal to it. She cleaned the passengers’ rooms when they weren’t there, so she could mostly avoid the annoying ones. Not me, though. I had to be with them pretty much the whole time. Most of the passengers were fine, but when you had to deal with someone like Awful Andy, it became a frustrating job.

  It took about five minutes to get to the suite that Cece was working in, and by the time I arrived, I was wondering if I had overreacted Andy. Maybe he just wasn’t very good with people, and with a little more time, he would come around.

  Cece’s cleaning cart was outside the room, and I pushed the cracked door open and let myself in.

  “Honey, I’m home!” I yelled with a grin.

  “I’m waiting for you in the bedroom!” she called back in a teasing, sultry voice.

  The VIP suites were all spectacular. Depending on my mood, I either found them depressing or awe-inspiring. If I was in a bad mood, they would get me down, because I knew I could never afford one myself. But on other days, just seeing the beautiful space brightened me up immediately.

  After a short entranceway the room opened up into a large open-plan living-dining area, with a table and chairs for eight people to eat at once, a couple of large sofas, and massive french doors that led out onto the spacious balcony outside.

  Cece’s voice had come from the master suite, which was located off on the right of the main living area. The room already smelled fresh from the cleaning spray, and everything seemed to glint and glimmer as the sunlight which poured through the big windows caught it.

  Cece was lying on the bed in the master suite in a parody of a seductive pose. With her elbow-length pink rubber gloves and plain housemaid’s uniform, she didn’t look as alluring as the expression on her face wanted to make her seem.

  “Hey, baby,” she cooed as I entered.

  I giggled, snatched a cushion from a chair next to the door and tossed it, catching her perfectly on the forehead.

  She sat up, a mock frown on her face.

  “No sugar for you,” she said with a pout. She climbed off the bed. “You can help me clean instead.”

  “That’s what I came for.”

  “Not the excellent company?”

  “That too,” I said with a grin.

  “Catch!”

  I held up my hands just in time to miss catching the pair of gloves which thwacked me in the head. I managed to snag them before they hit the floor.

  “So what are we doing?” I looked around the room with amateur cleaner eyes. The bedroom here was bigger than the entirety of three regular passengers’ cabins, containing a large four-poster bed in the middle of the room with a walk-in closet, two armchairs, a writing desk, several large modern paintings of various colorful shapes, and a big door leading to the dressing room and ensuite bathroom beyond.

  “We’ll start by making the bed and vacuuming, give the bathroom a once over, and then it’s onto the other bedroom.”

  “Is it a family staying here?”

  Cece shook her head.

  “Nope, just a couple. But they’re using both bedrooms.”

  “Why?”

  Cece gazed at me with an ‘are you serious?’ look. “I thought you were the detective?”

  I couldn’t help but laugh. No, I wasn’t a detective, but I had helped solve a few mysteries aboard the ship.

  “Maybe I should have been. Then Awesome Andy might be able to conjure up a smidgeon of respect for me.”

  Cece caught me with a serious look.

  “Who the heck is Awesome Andy? Has he been disrespecting you? Do you want me to go and kick—”

  “Hey, it’s nothing. He’s a photographer, and he thinks he’s a big shot, but he’s really not.”

  “Oh, for the photography cruise. I kinda zoned out in that meeting.”

  “Yeah, he’s one of the main guys running the photography events. A bit of an arrogant so-and-so.”

  “A what? A so-and-so? Man, you need to bring your insults into the twenty-first century. I can think of about a thousand better terms for a guy like that.”

  “Yeah, I’m sure you can, but you know me. I don’t like to use bad language.”

  “Nuh-uh. No way. Cece’s cussin’ school is now in session. Are you ready?”

  “Hey! No. Save it for another time. It’s too early in the day for all of that.”

  Cece snorted and shook her head at me. She always thought I was too straitlaced. Maybe she was right—but I am who I am.

  “Well, if you’re not cussin’, then you better be cleaning. Come on. Grab the other end of that bedsheet.”

  We took care of the bedroom and moved onto the bathroom. It was a big marble-covered room with a beautiful oval bathtub next to a picture window over the ocean. The room was already nearly immaculate. There were just some splash marks around the sink and mirror that needed wiping, and all the faucets got a rub with a cloth to really bring out their shine.

  “Come on. We’ll do the other bedroom and then we’re all done.”

  “You work a lot harder than I expected,” I said with a smile at her work ethic. She really was getting through this fast.

  “Well yeah, of course. The sooner I’m done, the sooner I can take a rest. If I don’t get at le
ast a half hour siesta in, I know I’ve been slacking.”

  “Wait, you take siesta breaks while you’re working?”

  Cece shrugged. “Sure. Don’t you? You can go where you want, anyway.”

  I’d never considered taking a break to nap during the day. I doubted I’d be able to sleep if I tried; I’d feel too guilty about slacking off. Cece, bless her, was not burdened in the same way.

  “No, can’t say I have.”

  “If I had your job, I’d spend half the day napping. Come on. You wipe those surfaces and I’ll do the bed.”

  Using the spray cleaner she’d given me and a cloth, I wiped down all the surfaces in the room, from the pretty little bedside tables and their lamps to the desk, drawers, and interior surfaces of the closet.

  This bedroom was smaller than the master bedroom, but was still larger than a regular cabin. Its occupant appeared to be the man of the mystery couple, judging by the clothes in the closet.

  “You hear that?” asked Cece.

  I cocked my head to listen. I’d been lost in my own thoughts, thinking about my breakfast with Ethan that morning. Now that I paid attention, I realized I could hear something: two people arguing.

  We heard the door to the suite open, and the voices grew louder.

  “Didn’t they see the cleaning cart?” I asked Cece.

  “Yeah, or the sign on the door that said –‘Cleaning in Progress,’” she said with a roll of her eyes.

  The couple either hadn’t noticed or didn’t care.

  “They don’t sound too happy,” I said with a frown. I started to head out to let the couple know we were there.

  Cece grabbed my arm and stopped me. “Shh. Let’s listen a moment.”

  I did as I was told, not because I wanted to eavesdrop, but because Cece was the housekeeper and I figured she knew what she was doing. I thought this was just housekeeping protocol or something.

  “You were! You were flirting with him!” said an angry male voice.

  “I was not flirting with him. I was being polite. It’s called having manners, which obviously you wouldn’t know about.”

  “What do you mean I wouldn’t know about? It’s not good manners to go and flirt with another man on your honeymoon, is it!?”

  “Oh please. I was just testing how strong his arm was! It’s a shame you can’t trade some of your money for some etiquette classes!”

  “Yeah, that’s right. Money. That’s always front and center in your mind, isn’t it? Money, money, money. My money. Sometimes I think it’s the only reason you married me!”

  I glanced at Cece and saw she was rubbing her hands together in excitement, clearly enjoying listening in. I frowned at her and nodded my head toward the door. We should go out there and let them know we were there and nearly done with their room. Cece grabbed my arm again and held up a single finger with a stern look.

  “You’d need a lot more money than you’ve got to make up for your lack of charm!”

  “My lack of charm? You’re the one who doesn’t know how to behave in public! You were fawning and flirting with that gym instructor like he was your husband.”

  “Well, it would be nice if he was.”

  There was silence from the living room, and this time I grabbed Cece’s wrist and tugged it. With some reluctance, she gave me a little nod and we opened the bedroom door and went out into the living room.

  “Hello! We were just cleaning in there,” I said, nodding back toward the bedroom door.

  Cece stepped up beside me. “There was a sign on the door.”

  I stared at the couple. I knew them! It was Jessica and Rick, whom I had met while they were boarding. They’d seemed so happy together then, but now, just a day later, they were warring with each other.

  The two of them stared at us, surprised by our presence. They really must have been completely oblivious to the cleaning cart outside and the sign.

  “Well? Are you done?” asked Rick.

  “We sure are.” I began to walk toward the door.

  “Hey, don’t I know you?” said Jessica, squinting at me. “I do! I thought you were a social media manager, not in housekeeping.”

  With a nervous laugh, I shrugged.

  “Just helping out. Someone called in sick, and we’re friends,” I said, hooking a thumb at Cece, who nodded in agreement with my story. “Anyway, we’ll be off now. Take care!”

  We left the suite before any further questioning could commence and regrouped outside the room.

  “Thanks for coming,” said Cece. “That made it much more interesting.”

  I shook my head. “I think they were the ones who made it more interesting.” After checking the time on my phone, I let out a sigh. “I’d better get going. The lecture will be over soon and I should get back there for the Q&A.”

  “Have fun. Come back and help any time you want. I’ll teach how to cuss.”

  With a quick hug, we parted ways, Cece whistling as she pushed her cart down to the next suite. I wasn’t quite whistling—for starters, I can’t whistle—but I was in a better mood than earlier.

  Being with friends really helped.

  But I couldn’t stay with my friends all the time. Sometimes, you had to spend time with people like Awesome Andy instead.

  Shaking my head to myself at the thought of speaking with him again, I headed back to the auditorium.

  Chapter 8

  When I arrived back at the auditorium, I pushed the door open gently, intending to slip in at the back and catch the end without anyone noticing I’d been away.

  There was one problem with that.

  Everyone else was gone. The auditorium was empty.

  “Hey! Where’d you run off to?”

  I almost jumped with fright.

  Sam rose up beside me from the seat next to the door she’s been lurking on. I’d completely missed her when I entered.

  “Hey. What happened? Where is everyone?”

  Sam shrugged. “Awesome Andy’s talk wasn’t as long as it had been billed for. He was done after an hour, and then after thirty minutes of questions he shut the rest of them down. Said he needed to save his energy for the rest of the cruise.”

  Typical.

  “Was he okay? Did he give you any problems?”

  Sam furrowed her brows for a moment. “He’s a bit... full of himself, don’t you think? He kept telling the audience how lucky they were to have him. I think most of them actually bought it.”

  “Yeah, he is a bit like that.”

  It sounded like he hadn’t personally upset Sam though, which was good. On the other hand, I was a bit disappointed that she hadn’t been a victim of his acerbic personality too. It would have been nice to have a fellow victim to commiserate together with. Still, there were plenty more days left in the cruise, and I doubted Sam would escape his scathing wit for all of it.

  “I went to see Cece. I meant to be back for the end of the lecture, but that wasn’t meant to be, apparently.”

  “Oh yeah? What was she up to?”

  “Just cleaning. I went to help. But this couple in one of the VIP suites walked in without realizing we were there, arguing nonstop. They were really nasty to each other.”

  “Yeah, well, fifty years of marriage will do that to you,” said Sam, amused.

  She had made the understandable assumption that they were an older couple. Most of the VIP guests were; young people either didn’t have the money or the time for luxury cruising.

  “Nope. They’re young, about our age. And they’re on honeymoon.”

  “Arguing on their honeymoon? That’s sad.”

  “It is, isn’t it? And they seemed so happy before. I met them when they were boarding. Jessica and Rick.”

  “Oh! I checked them in, didn’t I?” She looked up in thought. “They did seem happy when they arrived. But maybe it was just an act.”

  “Who knows?”

  We lapsed into silence—a comfortable silence, not like in the morning after I’d asked Ethan about t
he captain and he’d shot me down. That had been anything but comfortable. Though perhaps I was imagining some of it, reading too much into it.

  “All right. Let’s get out of here.”

  I stood up and flicked off the lights from the panel next to the door. Just as I was about to push it back open, I stopped and tilted my head.

  “What is it?” asked Sam.

  “Shh. Do you hear that?”

  I flicked on a single switch to give us just a little light and grabbed Sam by the arm, leading her down near the stage. I was sure I’d heard something.

  When we got there, I stopped and held a finger up to my lips and nodded my head toward the side of the stage.

  Sam raised a hand to her ear to cup it, and we both listened, trying to keep our breathing quiet. I tried to stop my heart pounding so loudly but it was uncooperative.

  There.

  I heard it again.

  And from the look on Sam’s face, so did she.

  It was giggling, and it was coming from just off the side of the stage.

  There was a small greenroom back there, and it must have been emanating from in there.

  “Oh, you!” said the female voice, followed with another girlish giggle.

  Although I’d only heard the voice briefly before, I was pretty sure I knew who it was.

  “Is that... Zara?” I asked in a hushed whisper.

  “Maybe?” Sam whispered back. “When Xavier left, he was talking to a couple of passengers. I didn’t see Zara leave at all.”

  “What about Andy?”

  There was more giggling behind the stage, which we both listened to before Sam answered, after it got quiet again.

  “I don’t know. I thought he went back to his room after he ended the Q&A session early.”

  There was the sound of a door unlatching, and then someone saying, “Shh.”

  Grabbing each other’s arms, Sam and I snuck into the second row of seats, crouching down onto the ground. In the dim light, you’d have to be really looking to spot us, and hopefully they wouldn’t be.

  “Look, there’s no one here! We can be as noisy as we like. La, la, la la,” sung Andy. “Ow! What’d you do that for?”