Chasing Clouds

by Annabelle Knight

  “Come on then,” Betty said, “you’ve been wiping the same table for a full five minutes now. What’s on your mind? You’ve not been yourself all day, love. I can see something’s up, so why don’t you do yourself a favour and get it off your chest? Come sit with me for a minute or two and tell me what’s wrong.” Betty lowered herself into a nearby armchair, letting out an exhausted sigh as she did so.

  “It’s nothing,” Elodie said resolutely as she slumped down in the chair opposite.

  The last thing she wanted to do was upset Betty. Telling her that she didn’t want to work for her anymore wasn’t something Elodie was looking forward to at all, so had decided to put the moment off for as long as she could. Betty was having none of it. Her no- nonsense nature, which was so beautifully reflected in Steph, rose to the surface in a burst of shrewdness.

  “Let’s not dance around it Elodie, just tell me. You’ll feel so much better and besides. I think I’ve got a pretty good idea what’s on your mind. You’re missing Tom, aren’t you?” Betty said, dropping her voice in what she hoped was a sympathetic tone.

  Betty had been fiercely single since Steph’s father had left more than twenty years ago. Elodie couldn’t help it; a little giggle erupted from her lips, which grew from a small chuckle to a full- on laugh the more she thought about the idea of missing Tom. She probably should have felt guilty about reacting in such a way, but the idea seemed too funny to stifle. Betty pulled back and cocked her head, unable to understand what was so funny.

  “Sorry,” Elodie said, catching her breath and wiping a tear from the corner of her eye. “You’re so off the mark. It’s not Tom at all.”

  “Well, what is it, then? You’re not pregnant, are you?” Betty asked, looking half- perplexed, half- incredulous. She had an air of motherly concern and was clearly under the impression that if it wasn’t boy trouble, it must be something far worse. After all, what exactly could a recently- single, twenty- something- year- old have to worry about? “You’ve been out of sorts all day. You know you can tell me anything, don’t you?”

  Elodie decided that it was now or never and that she would be best off grabbing the bull by the horns before the bull jumped to another wrong conclusion.

  “OK, I’ll tell you, but please don’t hate me,” Elodie said, a sombre tone creeping its way into her voice without a trace of the joviality of only a few moments ago.

  Betty was like a dog with a bone sometimes and deep down Elodie knew that honesty would be the best policy. Betty put her warm hand on Elodie’s shoulder and told her that no matter what it was, no matter how bad Elodie thought the situation would be that she, Betty, could never hate her. This made things all the worse. Elodie would have found it much easier to break this sort of news had she been met with cold hostility rather than warmth and understanding.

  “Come on, it can’t be that bad, surely?” Betty said, looking a little concerned now. Her brow furrowed and she crossed her arms over her chest. Elodie sighed: it really was now or never.

  “OK, well you know the other night when we all went out?” Betty nodded but didn’t say anything, not wanting to interrupt Elodie’s flow now she was finally opening up. “We met some men, some pilots to be exact. No, nothing like that!” she exclaimed, seeing Betty’s raised eyebrows. “Nothing happened in that way, it’s just that one of them, Adam, his name was, told me all about his job, the places he gets to see and the things he gets to experience and it all sounded amazing.”

  She paused for breath. Betty still looked a little confused and chose to remain quiet and let Elodie continue, which she did with increasing haste. “Anyway, to cut a long story short, I could never be a pilot, but I could be a flight attendant. I’d get to enjoy the same perks and I’d learn so many new things and get to do something that I’m good at. It’s kind of like being here but several thousand feet in the air,” Elodie finished.

  Betty said nothing but instead chewed on her bottom lip.

  “Well, it sounds like a wonderful idea. Of course, I’ll be sad to see you go, no one will be able to replace you, you know, but I can’t keep you here forever and you’ll come and visit us, won’t you?” Betty said, that warm motherly tone returning.

  “I’m not doing it. Well, truth be told I can’t do it. It’s way too expensive. I haven’t got savings. Oh, Betty, I’ve been so stupid. It’s not a case of you keeping me here, it’s more that I’ve trapped myself. I can’t afford the training course, not even by half. I’m so irresponsible; I can’t think what I’ve frittered all my money on. I mean, Tom paid for pretty much everything and I’ve basically spent every penny on meaningless shit!”

  Elodie buried her face in her hands. She felt hopeless and utterly exasperated with herself. If she couldn’t save the money beforehand, when she’d had pretty much a free ride, then how the hell was she going to manage it now that she had rent and bills to pay?

  The two women sat in silence for a few moments, staring ahead. Elodie twisted her fingers together in an awkward way, which after some time caused Betty to place her hand over Elodie’s in order to stop her from doing it anymore.

  “How much is this course?” Betty said, not looking up from her own hand, which was still placed gently over Elodie’s.

  “Too much,” Elodie replied bluntly. She brushed Betty’s hand away and stood up, tightened her ponytail, untied her borrowed apron from around her waist and handed it back to Betty. “It doesn’t matter, I’ll figure it out. I can always sell my liver or something,” she managed a wry smile, “although after all the booze I’ve had recently it’s probably not worth much now.”

  “Maybe I could sort you out an extra shift here and there?” Betty offered kindly.

  “Thanks, but I think it’ll take more than that. I need hundreds of pounds for the course and then there’s the hotel stay I’d need, food and travel money. Ugh, it’s just too much. Plus the deadline for the application is looming and it’d take me months of extra shifts to save that kind of money. I could always get a second job, I suppose,” she mused.

  However, Elodie knew deep down that even a second job wouldn’t help matters, there just wasn’t enough time. She’d just have to save and wait. So what if she had to put her dream off for a year or two? It’s like Steph always said, ‘Nothing worth having comes easily.’ Which was rich, considering Steph had basically inherited a successful business without lifting a finger. Elodie shook her head in an attempt to dislodge the thought; it wasn’t Steph’s fault Elodie was in the mess. Elodie vowed not to let jealousy rear its ugly head again, especially when it came to her friends.

  “Well if you want to take me up on those shifts you’ll have to let me know,” Betty said as she switched the café lights off, “I’m going to go up now, love, I’m shattered. I’ll sort the takings out tomorrow, can’t remember the last time a normal working day took it out of me like this. I’m going to have a soak and get an early night. Lock up on your way out, would you?”

  Betty stifled a yawn and gave Elodie a little wave before she disappeared through the doorway and into the back. Elodie heard the old staircase creak as Betty ascended. She stood there in the empty café and looked around: this had been her life, her second home and her hub for such a long time now, was she really ready to throw it away for a pipe dream? Elodie let out an exasperated sigh as she grabbed her bag from behind the counter. She’d managed to achieve absolutely nothing and felt well and truly fed up. If only there were a way she could make some quick cash. ‘Maybe I could get into stripping?’ she thought to herself glumly. Even if that were something she’d be up for, she doubted very much that anyone would be willing to pay to watch her take off her clothes. She let herself out of the back door; her arms were weary and the door felt much heavier as she pushed against it. It closed behind her with a thud of finality. She took the keys from her bag and sighed: that was it, the day was done, and so were her dreams. Snuffed out before they had even had a cha
nce of being realised, like a candle blown out by a cold breeze just as it had been lit.

  Elodie squinted at the clock on her bedside table, it hadn’t even gone seven am and already her phone was ringing. A small sense of panic grew inside her: was she supposed to be at work? Elodie knew she had the next two days off but that she was working three full shifts in a row to cover the weekend.

  “Steph? Everything OK?” Elodie asked after seeing her friend’s picture flash up on the screen and rapidly pressing the answer button. The phone was barely up to her face before the words tumbled out of her mouth.

  “Did you lock up last night?” Steph asked, her voice strangely tense and high- pitched. Elodie sat up, she didn’t like Steph’s tone one bit.

  “Yes. Your mum wasn’t feeling great, she said she had a headache so she went up early. Why?” she replied cautiously, the sleepy tone slipping from her voice.

  “Locked the door and everything? Because when I came down this morning the alarm wasn’t on, the door wasn’t locked and money has been taken from the till. No one cashed up, did they? The till hasn’t been zeroed, I’ve just done a read and almost a thousand pounds has gone,” Steph finished, her voice strained, as if the weight of what she was faced with had begun to press down on her.

  Elodie clapped her hand across her mouth. She had been so distracted she hadn’t set the alarm, that much she knew. But she could have sworn she had locked the door, she remembered having her keys out, but did she actually use them?

  “I, I…” she stammered, “I’m so sorry.”

  “El! We’re not insured, if there was no alarm, no lock and more money than we’re allowed…” Steph trailed off, the panic in her tone beginning to rise. “I need to ask you something,” she added before going silent; the only sound audible was the faint buzzing of static.

  “Go on,” Elodie replied. She didn’t like the blunt way Steph had said this.

  “Is there anything else you need to tell me, about this? Anything at all?”

  “No…” Elodie trailed off, she didn’t know anything about it and told Steph as much.

  “So it’s purely coincidence that the amount of money taken is near as dammit the exact amount you need for your course? If you tell me honestly what happened then we won’t say another word about it. I get it. People sometimes do crazy things when they’re under pressure. I know you’ve had a really rough time of it, I just need you to tell me the truth, El, before I call the police,” Steph finished with a deep sigh.

  Despite the kind tone her words had taken, Elodie felt as though they’d been laced with poison.

  “I don’t know anything about it at all,” she said in defence, “nothing, honestly. I would never steal from you, from Betty, from the café… never.”

  Elodie was shaking now. Never in a million years would she imagine having this conversation. Elodie recoiled as if Steph’s suggestion had been made from a fist that had reached through the phone and hit her hard in the face.

  “I need to speak to my mum,” Steph said bluntly. “Figure out how we’re going to deal with this mess.”

  “You haven’t told her already?” Elodie asked.

  “Of course not, I wanted to get the facts first before worrying her. You said it yourself, she’s not been well and the last thing I want to do is stress her out even more.” The phone went dead.

  Elodie sat there for several long moments wondering what she should do. Her head was spinning as a cocktail of anger, resentment, hurt and sadness bubbled within her. Elodie couldn’t help it. Warm, salty tears began to erupt from the corners of her eyes; they streaked their way down her pale cheeks and fell in fat droplets onto her crisp white duvet.

  There was a knock at the door and Carla appeared, a look of concern etched on her face. Before she could draw breath to pose the question of what was wrong, Elodie had begun to tell her everything, the words coming almost as quickly as her tears. When she eventually paused for breath Carla interjected.

  “You must have got it wrong somehow, babe. Steph knows you’d never steal, Christ! You were antsy about trying to use that out of date free cinema ticket, remember when we went to see Magic Mike and you almost cried when I made you risk it.” Elodie managed a meek smile and nodded, Carla was right. Steph should know her better than that, and it was that fact that hurt her the most.

  The morning passed in a blur. Having been woken up much earlier than she had anticipated, Elodie found herself with the gift of time and being unsure what to do with it. Annoyingly, it was a phrase Steph used all the time that kept echoing in her subconscious: ‘life admin,’ which, no matter how much she tried to ignore it, did make a lot of sense. It was because of this she found herself, for the first time in her adult life, on top of her washing, ironing, cleaning, odd jobs and correspondence. Between all of this, she checked her phone religiously. She had tried phoning Steph but the phone just rang and rang, she didn’t want to trouble Betty so had opted for an apologetic text and she had left the landline of the café well alone knowing that the café would certainly be shut for the day whilst the police were called. Elodie wracked her brain: she was so sure she had locked that door. After the one- millionth time of checking her phone, only to find it worryingly void of any form of communication, Elodie switched it off and hid it in her bedside drawer again. Occasionally she opened Carla’s laptop and searched for other courses, hoping that at some point since her last search a new one had been added that required far less from its applicants. The idea of becoming a flight attendant now seemed to be more of a pipe dream than ever and Elodie was annoyed at herself for being so certain, so decided that it was the right path for her.

  After closing her laptop down and, in an annoyed haze, shoving it under her bed, she decided that getting out of the flat would be a good idea. The weather was pleasant and a nice long walk might just shake her out of this mood. She readied herself, choosing a pair of old jeans and a faded jumper to dress herself in and headed for the door. Carla emerged with a look on her face that Elodie found hard to read: somewhere between wild abandon and smugness, she thought.

  “You have to get to the café now, El. Both Steph and Betty have been trying to call you. Steph says your phone goes straight to voicemail,” Carla said carefully.

  “I turned it off. To be honest, I’d forgotten about it, was actually just about to head out without it. Well, she can save her apology. I take it the police found something. CCTV of the real robber? Fingerprints? What? Because I know that the only thing I’m guilty of is complacency and a dash of stupidity.” Elodie seethed, her placid nature seemingly steamrollered out of the way by a new, more aggressive one.

  “El, just go to the café, hear her out at least,” Carla said, her eyes pleading with Elodie.

  Elodie looked at her friend and couldn’t help but notice the smallest of smiles forming on her lips. Did Carla think this was funny? It most certainly wasn’t. Elodie was being accused of a crime that she wouldn’t commit against her worst enemy, let alone her best friend. She stood there resolutely for a moment before the steamroller of aggression and contempt began to idle.

  “Ugh, alright then. I was just going for a nice calming walk but I know I need to go. Betty should hear my side,” Elodie said, resigning herself to the fact that no matter how much she protested, she would, eventually, back down anyway so she may as well get it over with sooner rather than later.

  Betty looked up as she heard the bell above the café’s door tinkle. She had sat herself and Steph down on one side of the table that sat in the centre of the café and positioned an empty chair for Elodie on the other.

  “Will you please tell me what’s going on,” Steph said, turning in her chair to face Betty, a look of determination on her drawn face. Betty didn’t reply at first but instead stared fixedly straight ahead as if something on the wall happened to be the most interesting thing she had ever seen. Steph huffed; she was so angry, so hur
t by Elodie. It was the dishonesty of it all, the fact that she’d played dumb and denied knowing anything at all despite conveniently forgetting the alarm, the door and knowing that all the day’s takings were in the till. Never in a million years would Steph had thought Elodie capable of such a thing, but it seemed that the old adage, ‘Desperate times called for desperate measures’ was true. After what seemed like an age Elodie crossed the cafe looking nowhere near as sorry as Steph would have liked.

  “Sit down love, we need to talk,” Betty said, motioning to the chair opposite her, but before she had time even to retract her hand a torrent of apologetic words erupted from Elodie’s lips.

  Steph sat there the entire time, stony- faced and unable to look her friend directly in the eye. She was going to do exactly as her mum had said earlier that morning and take a backseat.

  “I genuinely have no idea what happened to the money, I don’t, really I don’t,” Elodie finished sadly, looking wildly from Betty to Steph and back again.

  The barefacedness of it all made Steph’s blood boil. She couldn’t fathom why her mum was being so calm about it all; she hadn’t even called the police yet and it had been hours since the burglary. Steph decided then and there that it was time to take matters into her own hands, despite Betty’s stark warning not to. She opened her mouth to draw breath, she was going to let Elodie have it.

  “Elodie, we know…” she started, but before she could finish Betty had put a hand up to silence her

  “I know you don’t know where the money is, Elodie, and I know you had nothing to do with the robbery. That’s because, putting it plainly, there wasn’t one,” Betty said. “The money was taken from the till last night, that much is true, but I was the one that took it.”

  Both Steph and Elodie stared at her in disbelief, their eyes widening further when Betty, after a moment of rummaging in her apron pocket produced a white envelope with Elodie’s name written across it in black pen. She placed the envelope on the table and with one fluid movement slid it across the table and towards Elodie. All three women looked at the envelope before Elodie tentatively picked it up and peered inside.