Ozlander

by Samantha Liddell

  I mainly focused on encouraging the woman in the audience to not settle and to get up and chase their dreams as your dreams are not going to come and find you while you are picking up spicy tomato chip crumbs of the floor or doing the dishes day in day out.

  What really got them intrigued and excited was when I told them I ended up working at Scott’s Catering company that was hired to do all the catering on the ‘Outlander’ set. Questions then started to coming flooding in about the cast and what they were like in real life. I had to keep it pretty vague to ensure I didn’t give too much information away. But my main focus was not to skite about the people I had meet and were now friends with but more about the journey to get there. The journey was by far more fun and interesting than the destination but to start a journey you need to actually take action and start it yourself then your journey will just fall into place and you will start to attract the things you have always dreamt about. I started to feel more like a motivational speaker, a life coach or a preacher. “I think I may have just found my new calling.” I said to Scott. “Scott laughed, for the next five minutes anyway” Oh that Scott really does know me so well I thought.

  Scott ended the talk with a bit of business promotion. He talked about Scottlander catering and how his business is on a journey of its own at the moment with lots of new doors opening thanks to his first big contact working on Outlander and now he won the Contract to work on the Bibroohra set. I sat there wondering if everyone in the audience could see our heads inflating, it sure did feel like they were expanding. We were both really talking our adventures up something we didn't do much off. We were normally very humble people, we still were but I feel the limelight might be getting the best of us.

  I felt it was time to come back down to earth and end this talk. I looked at my watch and realised we had been up on stage for a good 45 minutes. Surely, we have paid off our VIP treatment and free room for the night by now I thought. Just as that thought crossed my mind, I heard the doors at the back of the auditorium swing open, I then saw two figures coming storming through, Yelling “We are here, sorry we are here, we got caught up but we are here. There was bit of a broken nose emergency, anyway, let’s begin.” the voice belonged to a man.

  I could still not see the two peoples faces yet just the shapes of the body, it wasn't until they moved closer to the stage ready to start their act I realised it must be Daniel and Sally, I squinted my eyes to try and get a better look at the couple when I thought the man started to look familiar the closer they got. I started to get an uneasy feeling, there was a strange aura in the room and a good reason as to why as Daniel was not Daniel, Daniel was Clive. Clive was dressed in a white shirt, Long pants, knee high boots and was holding a fake sword. If I didn't know any better I would say he was impersonating Jamie. He was the worst looking Jamie I had ever seen. I looked at Scott, Scott was in shock, he rubbed his eyes a few times to make sure what he was seeing was actually real. The man that had chased us through Cairns, The man that had tipped all our belongings out into cow poo, the man that wanted to outsmart Scott and get hold of that contract himself was the same man that was about to present us with a Jamie and Claire impersonating act along with a woman who I am only presuming was his wife. Was Clive an ‘Outlander’ fan also? either that or he was whipped by his wife and made to perform and impersonate his wife's fantasy man Jamie, His wife would have to be totally blind to think that Clive was anything like Jamie. Oh well, each to their own I thought.

  Jill was the next to storm through the back doors, she looked at Clive strangely as if she was trying to tell him something, She was trying to have a whole conversation with him without actually saying a single word, Just using her hard looking facial expressions, unfortunately Jill and Clive were not as talented at this particularly skill as my mother and I were.

  Clive looked at Jill for a second then decided to ignore her miming efforts and instead followed his wife up on stage. However once up on stage, they noticed people starting to leave the auditorium in order to keep up with their itinerary for the day. There were buses about to leave to take guest to a famous Historic village in Cairns for the afternoon before returning for an ‘Outlander’ banquet for dinner which Scott and I would, unfortunately, be missing due to our flight home.

  Clive started to look angry he had missed his chance in the limelight and once again it was taken off him by none other than Scott King his archenemy, He had not recognised Scott and I yet so we decided to try and evacuate the area before he did, but it was too late, he had set his eyes upon us, “You two again. How dare you, How dare you take this act off me. You already have the contract, was that not enough for you?” Clive asked in an angry tone.

  Scott replied. “Oh Clive, I didn't recognize you there all dressed up. How's the nose feeling?” Scott added for good measure.

  “My nose is broken thanks to you Scott, just like my bank account will be broken soon also without that contract in my name.”

  “Aye chin up Clive, Sure you could concentrate on your Jamie and Claire acts and take it around the world.” Scott said sarcastically.

  I added my two cents in too. “Oh Clive, are you meant to be Jamie?” I said trying to sound confused. “They are pretty big boots to fill Clive, in not sure I can see any resemblance of Jamie in you whatsoever. Before you take your act around the world you may like to work on that slight issue first.”

  “Ouch” Scott said to me. “That was a tad harsh Letticia,”

  “Sorry I got caught up in the moment of defending my Jamie.” Clive looked like he was about to explode with anger, we didn't want another fight to brew between Clive and Scott, So I decided to be the better person and walk away I had to pull Scott in the same direction.

  We decided to go get a drink in the restaurant and relax and unwind for a bit after our Stella performance we just gave. We were both still on bit of a high, in fact im pretty sure we could of taken that show around the world ourselves I though. I decided to quickly dash to the ladies before we ordered, and Scott went off to find a table in the meantime.

  I approached the ladies bathroom but as I went to open the door I caught sight of Jill and Clive along with Clive’s wife who were in an in-depth conversation in the foyer near my new found friend the knight. Their backs were facing me so the poor knight had the lovely pleasure of seeing Jill’s hard looking featured face, and Clive’s sneaky, rat looking broken nosed face. I decided to get a bit closer to see if I could hear what this in-depth rather suspicions conversation they were having was all about. Jill was doing most the talking, I was now at a good enough distance to hear every word she was saying to Clive and his wife.

  Chapter Twenty Two

  Another Crime to solve.

  What I was listening to was a dodge deal happening that involved all the ticket sale money that was meant to be a not for profit event. In fact im pretty sure any profit leftover was meant to go to a local charity, instead Jill, Clive and his wife were going to keep it for themselves, and do a runner. Jill was holding some documents in her hand which looked to be statements, Dodge statements I suspected. I knew I needed to get my hands on those statements and hand them into the police. I needed to go find my detective partner Scott and tell him the new information I now had on hand.

  I was in such a panic I had forgotten all about needing to visit the ladies and instead turned right around and went to find Scott. Scott had found the furthest away table possible from where I was coming from. It wasn't good when I was busting, not only to go to the ladies but busting with my new-found information that I just needed to share. I weaved my way through the tables which felt like I was back on the Royal mile, trying to get into the arms of my beloved Jamie but my feet were as heavy as concrete and I just was not making any ground.

  Finally, what felt like an eternity I was approaching Scott’s table. Scott was watching me running through the restaurant like a crazy Outlander fan who had just spotted Jamie and wanted his autograph. Scott had a look of amusement on
his face. I was a tad out of breath and need to regather myself before I could speak.

  Scott spoke first. “Gee did ya miss me that much Sassanach?” He said with a cheeky grin and wink.

  By now I had regained my strength to speak. “Scott it’s time to bring those army pants out of retainment, we have another case to solve.”

  “Well I would if I had them with me let alone any other pants but this so-called case you are talking about might just need to settle having a man in a kilt to solve it.” This comment was just the reason I had fallen in love with Scott. He had no idea what case I was talking about to start with and yet he agrees to solve it with me wearing his kilt. A man who I know will always be by my side, kilt or no kilt, but I do rather like the kilt option.

  I started to explain the case that we needed to solve to Scott. “Scott, Jill, Clive and his wife which I have no idea what her name is are up to something fishy. I overheard them talking about the ticket sale money. They are planning on taking off with it when it is meant to be going to charity. By the sounds of it they are not declaring the full amount. We need to get our hands on those documents and hand them into the police pronto.” I was starting to work up a bit of a sweat in this heavy 1700’s dress, I could have really done with a roll of deodorant under my arms, I decided to just go with it and be fully authentic to this era and really channel this situation. I’m pretty sure roll on deodorant had yet to be invented in this time. Scott was yet to notice and I’m pretty sure he would not hold back in telling me about my perspiration issues.

  “Right what's the plan in getting those documents then?” Scott asked in a ready to go into battle tone.

  “Well, we will just need to follow them for a bit and wait for our chance to get the documents.” I said.

  “Well that's a very thorough and involved plan Letticia, Luckily we have experience in following people, something I have started to do a lot of since meeting you.” Scott laughed.

  I gave Scott a little friendly punch in the arm, “Steady on what are you applying there?” I asked jokingly.

  “I am applying that you are a tad out of your mind, but I wouldn't have it any other way. That's the reason I love you.”

  “Oh that is the most romantic thing anyone has ever said to me.” I was being dead set serious, it actually was. It was a very true statement Scott just said, that I was a tad crazy, this was who I was, this is what I did, and to have a man love me for who I am, for my true self is something every woman should be striving to achieve. It took me a few chapters of my life to find him, but I did in the end and that's all that counts. I could feel myself getting all sentimental and philosophical. I needed to get into my solving a case state of mind. I gave myself a little shake and jumped up and down a few times and gave a little roar to get pumped up, seemed to work.

  Scott mocked me and did the same thing. “Right we ready now, we all geared up now?” Scott laughed.

  “Yeah let’s bring these 3 down,” I went to give Scott a high five, my hand was left up in the air for a few seconds alone while it waited for Scott to catch on what I was actually doing he then gave me a high five back and with that we retreated from our table weaving back through the tables of the restaurant to find our three perpetrators. Scott was starting to get excited he was on yet another adventure, I did however had to stop this adventure before it even got started, just for a minute or two so I could finally visit the ladies.

  Scott said, “didn’t you just go?”

  “No I was on my way to go but then I lost focus when I started eavesdropping into Jill’s conversation with Clive and his wife.”

  After the visit to the ladies was complete Scott and I were back on the trail to sniff out these three rats. We covered the whole of the Manor house within about an hour. Luckily most of the ‘Outlander’ Fans were off on an excursion to the historic village as part of the convention activities that were on offer, so it was very quiet around the place for Scott and I to solve this case. We finally came across a little room on the second level which looked to be a makeshift temporary office. The door had a glass window that covered the top half of the door, the light was on and nobody was in there, I could see ‘Outlander’ convention flyers scatter over the desk and I noticed Jill’s handbag on the floor she had been wearing at breakfast that morning. See, you have to pay attention to the finer details to be a detective, I was getting good at this I thought to myself. “Scott this must be Jill’s office they gave her for weekend, that's her handbag over there in the corner.”

  “How can you possibly know that is Jill’s handbag?” Scott asked confused.

  “It's a woman thing Scott you wouldn't understand.” I tried to open the door but it was locked.

  “There must be a master key for every room in here.” Scott said, “Follow me lets go find where they keep all the keys,” Scott took charge now and I followed him off on a key hunt. We went down to the foyer where reception was. We staked the place out. We notice a office just off the side of the reception desk and it was obviously a quiet period of the day as there was only one young girl with heavy make-up on at the front desk, She had caked on her foundation, accompanied by bright red lipstick and long black fake eyelashes. She would have fit in quite nicely at the brothel Jamie was living at, I thought to myself. She was waiting to check in the new arrivals at 2pm. It was rather quite at this time, so we decided to distract this young girl while one of us goes in search for the master key.

  “Oh, this is very Wentworth prison style Scott,” I said. “You know when Claire goes looking for the keys to Jamie’s Cell. She distracts the guard then when he goes off to dinner she goes hunting for the keys in his office.” I explained to Scott. I was doing it again, I could tell by the look on Scots face. The look spoke to me and said, now is not the time to lose focus and go into Outlander world Letticia. So, I took note of his frustrated look and obeyed him.

  I brought myself back into reality, however Scott decided maybe it wasn't such a bad idea. We decided Scott would practise his flirting skills with the young lady behind the desk, while I ducked out back to find the master key.

  Scott approached the desk. It didn't take much flirting effort on his behalf to get the girls attention. As soon as he opened his mouth and the first word came out of it in his ever so sexy Scottish accent this girl was hooked in. “Aye how's it going there lassie, got a bit of a quiet period have you? Looks like you could do with a coffee to wake your beautiful self-up, fancy coming for walk with me to grab a coffee.”

  The girl was drawn to Scott, she became all flustered and excited. “I would love to.” she managed to say. “But I’m not meant to leave the front desk unattended, I better not be too long.” She said.

  “Aye, well let's go get that coffee fast so we can return you to your desk before anyone notices.” Scott said, he motioned her to walk ahead, “after you milady.” Scott added for extra charm. The girl giggled with flattery. As she walked ahead, Scott looked over at me and now motioned me to head towards the back room. I had to regather myself and focus on the task ahead as after watching Scott flirt with that girl it had ended up affecting me a bit more than I thought it would and I didn’t like it one bit. I had to shake that feeling off and concentrated on the task ahead.

  I made sure the coast was clear then made a b-line to the back room. There I found a wall of keys. Each key was named and had its own hook. There must have been 100 keys in front of me. I stressfully started searching from the top and worked my way down through each key reading the name of the room each key belonged to. I was hoping the master key was labelled master key that was the more obvious name for it after all. I had got halfway down the Key wall when I heard two people talking, their voices were getting closer. I didn’t know what to do. Do I walk out casually or duck and hide under the desk? I decided to duck and take cover and hope for the best. The voice were now entering the office. I recognised the two voice, a males and a females which belonged to Jill and Clive. What were they doing in the back of reception
office I wondered? I held my breath and tried to stay still. I was squashed under a small desk.

  If Jill decides to take a seat at the desk her legs will surely bump into my knees. Scott was watching the whole situation unfold in between sips of coffee with his new found admirer. He too was in a panic but had to stay calm.

  Jill continued to stand while talking to Clive, I was just hoping she would continue in this position. She moved over to the door and shut it. She was looking for the master key herself, I overheard her telling Clive she had looked her set of keys in her office. She grabbed the key that was the next key I would have checked. Hells Bells, just my luck I thought, plus I was now trapped in a tiny office with two criminals. Jill started going through the money transactions with Clive and how much they would both walk away with. It was ludicrous, the sum was pretty healthy indeed.

  I decided to record them using my phone. I would need all the evidence I could to bring these two criminals down. Their conversation lasted just five minutes or so then they left the room. Clive said his wife was waiting in the bar for them to have a celebration drink.

  Once they were well out of sight I crawled out of my cramped little space and quickly got out of the office. Scott had politely declining a dinner invitation from his new admirer and had now left her heart broken back behind her front reception desk where she belonged. He quickly ran to me and hugged me and asked if I was ok. All in front of a very confused looking receptionist. The poor las would get over it sooner or later I thought. I had no idea what her name was but I decided to refer to her as Laoghaire. I thought I had better remind myself to look for an ill wish she may sneak under my bed or into my bags. Then I remembered I had no bags or a bed to sleep in tonight so I would be safe from any ill wish she wished to plant for me.

  I decided I need to focus and forget about Laoghaire, I could see Scott was waiting patiently for me to come out of Outlander world and re-join him in the present time. Scott was getting use to my time travelling experiences now and he would just allow me to refocus in my own time. Another reason Scott is my perfect man, my Jamie in fact.