Hitting send on all of that isn't easy. I'm not lying. I've never told anyone that before. My parents thought I was just drinking too much blood at first or maybe I had a food allergy to something the human ate… I'm just glad that Mother convinced Father that I shouldn't drink from a human until I was at least ten, and by then, I figured out ways to get around that without them realizing. I almost turned it into a game, and I'm still unsure if they realize that I've managed to go until just recently without drinking from a human directly.
Julian hasn’t responded. It takes me a moment to realize that I might not get a reaction, and maybe he’s waiting for my next question.
Do you maintain any control over your wolf, or does your wolf take over you? Do you share a mind? Or do you two house one body?
That’s more than one question.
They’re all related, I protest.
My wolf and I… We’re related. We’re two in one, I guess. Yes, he can take over, and honestly, I don’t know if it would be safe for you to be around my wolf.
Why not?
No. It’s my turn for a question.
I bristle and drink the rest of my blood. My stomach churns. The blood was cold, as cold as Julian is being.
Do you only want to be with me because I’m a werewolf? Is it because you want to have a pelt?
Yes, I want to be with you because you’re a werewolf.
I knew it. You don’t care for me.
I do care for you. A great deal. I want to be with you for who you are. You’re a werewolf. I can’t distinguish you as separate from your wolf. Two in one, remember? You said so yourself.
I’m nothing more than a prize to you, aren’t I? I should’ve known better than to think you might be anything more than a bloodthirsty, conniving vampire.
What are you saying, Julian? That I’m not good enough for you?
No. I’m just saying that you aren’t good for me.
As if there’s a difference.
Maybe not.
Does that mean all of this is over then? I text.
Yes. Yes, I think it does.
Chapter 23
Julian
I can’t sleep. For whatever reason, I’ve been tossing and turning all night long, and I don’t bother to try to sleep anymore. My wolf wants out, and I’ve half a mind to let him roam free.
Quietly, I slip out of the castle and head on down toward the forest. I don’t dare leave the campus, and I don’t allow my wolf freedom either. The sun is just beginning to rise, streaks of pink and orange slashing across the sky, brightening it from the murkiness of night. The moon hadn’t given me any comfort this night, and I have no idea what to think about as far as the promises for the coming day.
Everything has been so utterly chaotic lately that I don’t know what to think or do, how to feel. Everything is falling apart, and—
“Julian.”
“Romelia?” I whirl around.
The vampire stands before me in a short red and black plaid skirt, a vest with a tie, and a red capelet. Her uniform is missing one important piece—her smile.
I rush up to her and embrace her. “Romelia. Why are you here? Were you worried?”
“Because of your phone.”
“I’m sorry. I thought about asking Bermon to allow me to borrow his, but—”
“You lost yours?”
“It was stolen.”
“I knew it.” Now her grin stretches across her face. “One of your friends took it.”
“What? What are you talking about?”
“Someone wants to tear us apart.”
She hands me her phone, and I skim through the messages before going back and reading them carefully.
“You used to be so scared about hurting someone by drinking from them that you would make yourself sick?” I ask.
“Yes,” she admits, “and I never did tell anyone else that before.”
“You did see my wolf for a second or two. Do you want to see him?”
“No, that’s fine. Not now. Later, yes, when we’ll have more time, but…”
“It was a test.”
“Yes. I was already thinking then that the texter wasn’t you.”
“You honestly think one of my friends did this?”
“Who else would it have been? For it to have been one of my friends, they would’ve had to come to Moonstone Academy, find you, grab your phone, and leave.”
“That does seem a little far-fetched,” I muse as I rub my chin.
“Do any of your friends know about me?” she asks quietly. “Your siblings are too young. Your parents?”
“My siblings don’t know about you, and my parents… I haven’t figured out the best way to go about telling them about you.”
She nods slowly, but I can see that she’s troubled to hear this.
“They know you exist,” I rush to add. “They just don’t know your name or that you’re a vampire. But they do know that I’ve met someone who means a great deal to me, and it’s why I haven’t called them like I should.”
“I don’t want to get in the way of you and your family,” she protests.
“You aren’t,” I assure her, scrolling back through the messages.
“Can you see anything that makes you think you know who sent me the texts?”
“Some of them seem really angry.”
“Yes, like he was trying to bait me,” she agrees.
“He or she,” I mumble.
Her eyebrows lift.
“Mercy.” I close my eyes, nod, and then hand her back the phone as I open my eyes again. “It had to have been Mercy. She knows about you. She’s known the entire time.”
“Did she come with you to the party?”
“The ball? Yes. She and Bermon did.”
“Are you certain he didn’t do it?”
“Bermon? No. He’s not capable of something like that, but Mercy is.”
Romelia opens her mouth and then shakes her head.
“Go ahead,” I prompt gently, reaching out to grasp her hand.
She stares at our interlocked fingers, squeezing my hand tight. “Julian, would Mercy… Do you know of any werewolves who would sneak to Blood Haven Academy and behead one of our statues?”
“If you’re asking if Mercy would do something like that… Yes, I do think she would.”
Romelia blows out a breath.
“She’s a wonderful person. She is. Sometimes, unfortunately, she lets her emotions cloud her judgment. She’s a tempest, a ball of emotions, and if she’s your friend, she will defend you until her dying breath.”
“And that’s what she’s doing here. She sees me as a threat to you. She doesn’t think it’s possible that I can truly care for you just because she’s convinced I’m a monster.”
“That’s one thing about werewolves. We’re loyal to a fault, and right now, it’s a fault to be sure. She doesn’t trust you, Romelia, but think of it this way,” I say as I lift her chin and rub my thumb along her jawline. “Mercy doesn’t trust me or my judgment either.”
“I’m sorry.” She lays her head on my shoulder.
I rub her back, holding her close, inhaling her scent. "What were you thinking, coming here like this? It's the day. The other students will be awake soon."
“I know I can’t be here long, but I had to see you. I had to be sure…”
“We aren’t broken up.” I bring up our hands and kiss each one of her fingers. “We’re very much together. No one is going to tear us apart. Not Mercy, not anyone.”
“Not Bermon?”
I hesitate. “He’s only ever told me to be careful and asks if I truly do care for you. He doesn’t want me to get hurt.”
“I won’t ever hurt you,” she protests.
“I think he realizes that, but…”
“Others won’t understand, and they might,” she says with a sigh. “And it’s not just Mercy who doesn’t want us together. My parents, Constantine… Tyra.”
I flinch. “Your friend.”
>
“Yes. She thought… She actually had the audacity to think that you had something to do with the statue being beheaded.”
“Me?”
“Yes. It happened the night we spent together.” Her cheeks glow pink with embarrassment. It’s utterly charming. “She thought that was too much of a coincidence, and… What is it?”
She’s trailed off because I’m scowling. My inner wolf is raging, howling, and I have to hold him back.
“Mercy,” I growl. “She was smiling that morning. I didn’t think anything of it, but maybe… It’s possible she went to Blood Haven Academy. I don’t know for certain, but—”
“Don’t,” Romelia begs. “Don’t confront her.”
“About what? About the statue? Or my missing, stolen phone that she used to try to convince you to break up with me?”
Romelia shrugs. “You can ask around if she’s seen it, get a new phone, pretend that you got in contact with me, and I told you in no uncertain terms that we’re done.”
“And lie to her to keep her off my back.”
“It’s an idea,” she mumbles. “Not a very good one, but…”
I grimace. “Let’s not worry about any of that now.”
“Julian, we can’t just ignore what’s going on in the world around us,” she protests.
“I know. All I’m asking is for one moment of peace, a moment between you and me.”
“Is that all you want, though?” she murmurs. “One moment?”
Of course that’s not all I want. I want to spend the rest of my life with her, but so many outside forces are conspiring to keep us apart. How can I promise her that we’ll have tomorrow when today isn’t even a guarantee?
“I suppose a moment is better than nothing,” she mutters.
I lift her chin. “We will figure out everything,” I say firmly.
“We just need time to,” she says dryly.
“Essentially.” I shrug and hold her against me. “I don’t want to ever let you go.”
“So don’t.”
“If only things were that simple.”
Romelia nods a few times and then heaves a sigh that makes my chest ache. “Maybe things are too tumulus right now,” she murmurs. “As much as I don’t want to, maybe we should—”
“Should what? Stop this? Stop seeing each other? Romelia, we already went months without seeing each other, and while I lived for your texts, that’s not all I want. I need you in my life, and not just through my phone. You are what keeps me going. You keep me alive.”
She smiles up at me through bloody tears before gazing off in the distance. I follow her line of vision and spy mountains in the distance.
“You want to run away,” I say.
“A part of me does, yes,” she admits, “but I would never ask that of you.”
“We can’t even though I’ve considered it.”
“Of course not. Your family—”
“It’s not just because of my family. Without us, the vampires and werewolves will be at each other’s throats. We need to try to stop them, to hold them back, to make them see reason. I don’t know about the vampires, but the werewolves aren’t listening to the professors.”
“The vampires aren’t either. It’s… It’s chaos.”
“Which is all the more reason why we can’t just abandon them to their fate.”
She shakes her head. “Julian, I’m not so sure we can stop them.”
“Maybe not, but we have to try.” I lift her chin and rub my thumb along her lips. With a tiny smile, she kisses my thumb. “We aren’t going to stop fighting for peace and for us. We aren’t ending things because the others are allowing violence to dictate their actions.”
“We won’t let violence win the day.”
“Or claim the night.” I kiss her gently to seal our promise.
“I should go. My class—”
“Skip it,” I suggest.
“Julian.”
“I’ll skip mine, and we can have a day together. We had one night. Let’s enjoy some hours while the sun is shining.”
“I don’t know…”
“You need to decide quickly,” I tell her. “The werewolves are starting to wake, and—”
“All right,” she says quickly, her voice breathless with excitement. “Where are we going?”
I squeeze her hand, and we're off and running. Even with my wolf, I can't keep up with her vampiric speed, but she doesn't use it, just as I stay human. Still, I'm faster than most humans, and we run and run and run, enjoying the rush of air blowing us. It almost feels as if we're soaring, flying, and I want to jump, to leave Earth behind, to sever any ties to this planet.
Eventually, we stop when we’re about halfway to those mountains. All around us is a field of flowers in shades of blues, reds, pinks, and yellows. I don’t know each of their names, but the sight of Romelia walking around, bending down to touch some and smell others… She’s so very beautiful.
When I blink, I see a flash of Romelia lying down, her face a pale gray, flowers scattered across her motionless body. I release a ragged breath and blink several times.
“Are you all right?” Romelia asks.
“Yes.” I hold out my hand. “Come with me.”
This time, we walk, and I guide her into a human city. The hustle and bustle of their lives seem so mundane after all of the violence our academies have faced recently, and that's perfectly fine with me.
We enter a diner and order breakfast. We share pancakes, waffles, sausage, eggs, bacon, toast. Everything is delicious, especially the last drop—a bit of syrup I wipe from the corner of Romelia’s lips.
Afterward, we head to the library and find some books on vampires and werewolves. We take turns reading passages to each other, and we laugh so hard and loud that we’re kicked out.
Undeterred, we then watch a movie in a theater, but we don’t exactly watch it. The room is empty except for the picture on the big screen, but all we see is each other, and when the hero professes his undying love for the heroine, I kiss Romelia.
She is my everything, and she always will be. Nothing will keep us apart for long. Nothing.
Chapter 24
Romelia
After the movie, Julian buys us ice cream. I’ve never indulged in the cold treat before, and he said it made my lips blue. My teeth chatter. A lot of vampires are cold compared to humans, but I’ve never felt this cold before. My skin even pebbles some.
"What's this?" I ask, holding up my arms.
“You’ve never had goosebumps before?” he asks.
“No.”
“It happens when bodies are cold.” He rubs my arms, his hands moving up and down fast, the friction warming me. When he moves his hands away, the goosebumps are gone.
“Why do bodies do that?” I ask.
“The rubbing causes friction—”
“No, the goosebumps.”
“It’s a way to try to retain body heat.”
“It fails,” I mutter.
He laughs and snakes an arm around my waist. “I’m sorry. Maybe I should’ve bought us lunch instead.”
“No, it was a delicious treat, just like you.” I reach up and tap his nose.
Julian captures my finger and kisses it.
The rest of the day is more of the same, us trying out human things, enjoying each other’s company, allowing the rest of the world to fade away in the background.
It’s as perfect as can be even if it does ring a little false.
This isn't real. It's not our normal, and it won't ever be. We have duties and responsibilities that we've been holding off and avoiding. It's only going to cause more problems for us down the road, which is already rocky enough as it is. The pitfalls of life are terrible, potholes everywhere, massive holes deep enough to bury us alive.
What will the future hold for us? Will we survive, or will we both die for the right to be together? Is the only way we can be together forever through death?
The darker my thoughts turn
, the more I want to scream.
Julian cups my face. We’ve traveled back to that flowery meadow, and it’s time for us to part. I know it is, but I don’t want to.
“Do you want to feed again before you return?” he murmurs.
I smile shyly at him. Three times already, we’ve sneaked into alleys so that I could have some of his blood. It feels so very dangerous, but it also makes me feel that much closer to him.
“Are you sure?”
“I wouldn’t be offering if I didn’t want you to,” he says simply.
“I wish…”
“What do you wish?” His light green eyes are so very foreign to the ones I normally see all day. I could stare at them for hours.
“I wish I could give something of myself to you in return.”
“Silly girl.” He brushes my hair back and then kisses my forehead. “You already have.”
This time, he doesn’t offer me his lips. He tilts his head to the side. My ears focus on the throb of his heartbeat, zeroing in on it so that it’s all I hear. My fangs ache to sink into his neck, to pierce his skin, but I draw back and shake my head.
“No,” I try to say, but the word doesn’t sound right. My fangs hurt so badly that I can hardly talk.
“You can do this,” he assures me.
“I don’t want to.” Can he even understand my words?
“I trust you.”
It’s not a matter of trust. I’m afraid. Or maybe it is only about trust because I don’t trust myself.
“One day,” he murmurs as he gives me his wrist as he had before. “One day, you will trust yourself.”
My heart bursts. Julian knows everything about me, including my fears, and I accept the gift of his blood. I drink just enough to satiate me for now, and then I kiss his wrist until the wound has healed entirely, the skin unblemished and perfect. It's as if I never drank from him at all.
My arms wrap around him, and I squeeze him in a tight embrace.
He rubs his hands up and down my back, the gesture so sweet and soothing I could fall asleep standing up.
Blood Haven: Year One: A Mayhem of Magic World Story Page 15
