Blind Trust: A Military Romantic Suspense (Men of Steele Book 6)

by Gwen Hernandez

  In her entire life, no mattress had ever felt so wonderful.

  Hours later, she awoke in the dark, still groggy, but refreshed. Outside, insects buzzed and chirped. Or were those frogs? She’d never camped before and didn’t know much about Montana’s fauna. Her stomach growled and her mouth tasted like tar. She sat up, ribs protesting. How long had she slept?

  She tried to run a hand through her hair, but her fingers tangled in the wild mass. Little particles of what felt like twigs and leaves fell into her lap. And she didn’t smell too great either.

  Not that she needed to impress anyone. Nor was she particularly bothered by sweat or dirt. And her highest priority was getting to Megan. But since that was off the table until daylight, maybe she could take a minute to clean up and feel more human than wild animal.

  Unzipping the tent flap, she peered out into the dark vestibule—as Todd had called it—and felt around for the boots. Loosening the shoes as much as possible, she slipped them on, unzipped the outer cover, and crawled into the faint moonlight.

  Frigid, damp air quickly infiltrated the gaps in her clothing, but nothing stirred.

  She found Todd sitting up against the rock wall on the lee side of the tent, eyes closed, barely visible beneath a knit cap and a shimmery blanket.

  Her heart plummeted. Was he warm enough? What if he got hypothermia and died?

  Careful to keep her distance, she called out softly, “Todd.”

  He didn’t startle, or lash out, or any of the other responses she’d worried about. His eyes opened and he watched her serenely for a second before speaking. “Everything okay?”

  “I think so.” The unforgiving air cut right through her fleece jacket and jeans. “Aren’t you cold?”

  “Probably not as cold as you.” His words were thick, tinged with sleep.

  “The tent was perfectly comfortable. I feel bad that I took the whole thing for myself.”

  “Hog-em-all.”

  “I have no idea what you’re talking about. Did the cold go to your head?” Her teeth chattered in earnest now. Maybe the cold was going to her head.

  He chuckled softly. “It’s something my brothers and I used to call anyone who wouldn’t share. As in, ‘don’t be a hog-em-all.’ I have no idea where it came from.” He opened the blanket wide like a set of wings. “Come here before you freeze to death.”

  She crawled onto his lap and into his arms without hesitating. “I’m sorry. I stink. And I’m dirty.” How mortifying. She was sitting in a hot guy’s lap and she looked and smelled like one of the bison she and Megan had seen from afar while hiking.

  “Don’t worry about it,” he said. “I can’t smell you over me anyway.”

  He closed her into the delicious, warm cocoon he’d created inside the fleece-lined blanket and eased her back against his chest, partially covering her head since she didn’t have a hat. It should’ve been weird, basically spooning with a complete stranger, but somehow it wasn’t. Sure, some women met a guy in a bar and were naked and sweaty with him twenty minutes later, but even if she’d experienced that kind of desperate attraction, she’d never have let herself act on it. Far too risky.

  But Todd wasn’t just some random guy. He’d saved her from falling, and had been keeping her safe and alive ever since, even sleeping outside presumably so she wouldn’t feel threatened.

  What better way to learn who someone was than to see how they reacted in a crisis? So far, he’d been nothing but selfless, respectful, and kind. And honest to the point of bluntness. She could be forgiven for trusting so quickly.

  “We can clean up in the morning when it’s warmer,” he said.

  “That would be great.” The cold bit into the skin of her face, but her shivers had subsided, and she could talk without endangering her tongue. “I feel beastly. I know it shouldn’t matter…”

  “It doesn’t make you weak, or even selfish, to want to feel good. Especially after the couple of days you’ve had.”

  She sighed and fully relaxed into him. “I just keep thinking about Megan stuck in that compound with JJ and—”

  The tears came out of nowhere catching her completely by surprise. Todd held her as she sobbed in a way she hadn’t since her grandmother died, her throat so tight she gulped for air. “Oh, my God,” she said, wiping her cheeks and trying to will the waterworks to cease. “I’m sorry.”

  “Lindsey, stop apologizing. You’ve been under extreme strain for days now. Let it out. I can handle it.”

  So she did. She cried over losing Megan to JJ and his asshole crew, the stress of being chased, the stark fear of almost dying on the side of a mountain, and the constant worry about whether she’d be able to save her friend. She even cried over the shit that had gone down with Cruz, her asshole of an ex-boyfriend.

  And through it all, Todd simply held her close, his rough cheek against hers, his chest rising and falling in a soothing rhythm at her back. When she finally calmed down, she was depleted but alert, acutely aware of the muscled body supporting hers, the arms holding her in their circle of protection.

  “Look up,” he said softly, his breath on her ear setting loose a hummingbird in her chest.

  She tilted her head back and gasped. The stars were a thousand times brighter than she’d ever seen. Out here—especially now that the moon had set—the dark was pure, unnerving.

  “Incredible, isn’t it?”

  “Yes,” she whispered. “There are so many layers of stars, it seems endless. Now I understand how sailors could navigate by starlight.”

  “Right? It’s no wonder people were obsessed with the heavens in the old days. You could hardly ignore them.”

  A satellite tracked across the sky, steady and fast, and disappeared into the trees. Several minutes later, a shooting star streaked overhead in a shower of sparks, followed by dozens more in the space of thirty or forty minutes.

  Good thing, because she had plenty of wishes, all of them for the same thing. Keep Megan safe. No matter how soon they found help, nothing could save Megan from whatever was happening now.

  “I’m surprised a Sinzian Empire fan like you hasn’t spent more time studying the cosmos,” Todd said in a teasing tone.

  “How did you— Oh, my shirt.” Her old “WELCOME TO THE SYZYGY” tee hadn’t been in great shape before the hike, but now it was covered in dirt and had a tear to the left of her belly button that let in the cold air. She’d only held on to it this long because it was silly and nerdy and reminded her of her goofy dad—a huge fan of the series. She loved it. “I think my interest in the movies lay more with the story and the characters than the space element.”

  “Meaning you watched for Brandon Marlowe.”

  Duh. “Who didn’t?”

  “Denae Washington’s more my type.”

  “Isn’t she great?” Lindsey couldn’t help but gush. “Last year, Megan and I waited in line at the LA Festival of Books for hours to meet her and the author of the original books. They were both so gracious and friendly, even though it was unseasonably warm for April, and they’d been greeting people all day who were upset that Brandon backed out at the last minute because he got strep throat or something. Meg was so bummed he wasn’t there, but we still had fun.” The memory made her smile. “She’s good about dragging me to fun things I’d never think to do on my own.”

  Initially, that had been part of Cruz’s appeal too, but unlike him, Meg was okay with Lindsey’s limits.

  A sob built in her throat. Would she see her again?

  As if sensing her mood change, Todd gave her arm a squeeze. “Tell me more about your friend.”

  Lindsey took a deep, shaky breath, her thoughts of Meg all jumbled together in her mind. “Well, she’s really smart, and super ambitious. She used to work in marketing at the same company where I started out after college, but then she began offering freelance graphic design on the side. A couple of years ago, she quit her day job to do it full time.”

  “Nice.” Todd shifted slightly, renewing her
awareness of every millimeter of contact between them.

  “Yeah, but she didn’t stop there. She created these online courses on design, and later about how to start your own freelance business, and she’s making a killing.” Lindsey had helped Megan with her taxes this year—was, in fact, still tying up loose ends to prep for next year—and couldn’t believe anyone would pay such high prices for a course. Her friend had clearly found a niche. “This trip was supposed to be a joint celebration of our success.”

  Lindsey’s throat tightened. Would they ever get to celebrate? “I also think Meg secretly wanted to get me out of LA for a few days.”

  Damn. Why had she said that out loud?

  “Why’s that?”

  Her stomach clenched. No way could she tell him the whole humiliating story, but sharing some of it wouldn’t hurt. She’d never see the guy again after tomorrow anyway. He was a good listener, and being in the dark where he couldn’t see her face made it easier to talk. “My last boyfriend, Cruz, cheated on me, and Megan thinks I’m still in a funk over it.”

  Todd’s muscles tensed. “Jesus, that sucks. I’m sorry.” He was quiet for a moment, softening his hold, as if forcing himself to relax. “Are you? Still in a funk over it, I mean.”

  Another satellite blinked its way across the cosmos on an unnaturally straight path. “Probably.” Too much. “Not because I miss him or anything. We were only together for six months, and the last half wasn’t great.” She almost laughed at her grand understatement.

  Cruz had started to chafe at her straight-laced, homebody ways, but she’d stuck it out because he’d made her feel so special—sexy, beautiful, desirable—in the early days, and she’d thought if she could figure out how to loosen up a little, maybe they could recapture that magic.

  Looking back, the warning signs had been there from the beginning—the way he flirted with her volleyball teammates and then claimed she was overreacting when she called him on it, for instance—but she didn’t like to fail, and she’d been reluctant to return to being alone.

  Only now could she clearly see that being on her own was far preferable to letting that jerk tear down her self-esteem bit by bit. “I’m an analyst by nature, though. I can’t stop going over our time together to figure out where things went wrong. How I misjudged him so badly, why I stayed with him as long as I did.”

  “I think the laws of inertia apply to more than physics,” Todd said. “Bad relationships, nightmare employers, toxic family members. For some reason, at least up to a point, it’s easier to stick with them and put up with the pain than to leave.”

  Wasn’t that the truth? “I guess the thought of being alone is sometimes scarier than being with the wrong person.” She sighed. “Until a situation gets really bad, it doesn’t feel worth the effort to make a change.”

  He made a noise of agreement and they fell silent.

  She watched the stars, lulled by the sound of his breathing and a faint rustling of trees, letting the peace settle into her battered soul. “What time is it?”

  “Probably about three a.m.”

  Still middle of the night. “We should get back in the tent. It’s only going to get colder until the sun rises.”

  “It’ll be a tight fit,” Todd said. “Are you sure you’re okay with that?”

  “Todd, I’m sitting on your lap right now.”

  “Fair point.” He let her go, taking back all his heat and comfort. “You go first, I’ll join you in a minute.”

  His boots crunched on the dry leaves as he moved away from their camp into the trees. She removed her shoes in the outer shelter and slid through the zippered opening. Lying on her side, facing the entrance, she strained her eyes to see in the inky darkness as she heard him zip the vestibule shut.

  “Where are you?” His voice was maybe a foot away.

  “Right here. Trying not to be a hog-em-all.”

  He chuckled. “We should put the blanket down first, then open the sleeping bag and use it like a comforter.”

  “I didn’t want to get the inside dirty.”

  “It’s fine,” he said, his rich voice skimming across her nerves like a lover’s touch as he tugged the bag onto his lap. “I’ll shake it out tomorrow.”

  He handed her the blanket, and she folded it in half and spread it over the floor with the fleece side up, crawling around until it was flat under her. “Okay. All ready.”

  “Will it hurt too much to lie on your left side?”

  “No, that’s my good side.” If she had such a thing right now. She spread out on the fluffy blanket and squished herself as close to the far wall of the tent as possible to give him room.

  He knelt and shut the tent flap before carefully stretching out beside her, sandwiched against her back, and slid the puffy bag over them, tucking in the edges around their bodies to trap the heat.

  “This okay?” he asked, his intimate voice and full-body contact in the dark triggering all kinds of foolish fantasies.

  God, for all she knew, he had a girlfriend. Or a boyfriend. Or both. And she wasn’t looking for either. She had enough going on in her life right now. “Do you have anyone back home who’s going to be mad about this?” she asked, unable to help herself.

  “No.” He held himself deathly still. “Are you mad about this?” he asked.

  “About Megan and those guys, yes. About you? Never. I’d be dead without you.” She grimaced into the darkness. “I’m just sorry you got dragged into my mess.”

  He made a dismissive sound. “I don’t mind being in your mess. In fact, I kind of like it. Keeps me out of my own head.” He paused for a moment, somehow retreating while maintaining full-body contact. “I hope that doesn’t freak you out.”

  Not in the way he was thinking. “I think it’s a bit late for that. Besides, if today was a tryout, you’d definitely be my end-of-the-world pick.”

  “What’s that?”

  Later, she’d blame her nerves for making her babble like a dork. “I have this weird thing I do pretty much anytime I’m in a room with other people—yoga class, a Metro car, the DMV—where I look around and try to decide who’d I’d want to pair up with if the people in that group were Earth’s only survivors.”

  “That is weird.”

  She pushed her shoulder back into him playfully. “Hey.”

  “Seriously, it’s kind of strange.” His obvious amusement made her smile. “But interesting. Do you ever decide that you’d be better off alone?”

  “Sometimes. But I’d rather not face the apocalypse by myself.”

  “Do you have a type?” he asked. “Like do you go for the person who seems like they can fight, or is it all about looks?”

  “I mean, looks are nice, but I usually go for the semi-nerdy type. I figure you can build physical strength, but it would be harder to acquire knowledge after everything’s wiped out.”

  “You’d never choose me, then. I went into the Air Force, not college.”

  Did she detect a hint of defensiveness? Her fault. She’d just flat out told him she wouldn’t go for the hot guy. “I just did.”

  “Out of a field of one.”

  “Honestly, out of a field of every man I’ve ever met. I think you’d be pretty freaking handy during Armageddon. It’s you who’d be getting the short end of the deal being stuck with me.”

  “I don’t know,” he said. “I’m stuck with you now, and it doesn’t seem so bad.”

  Her face grew warm and she fought a smile. Don’t be ridiculous. He was probably one of those guys who flirted with everyone. The kind who’d been born with their default setting on “hel-lo there.” Like her asshole ex. Her pulse skipped anyway. “Did I mention I’m an accountant?”

  His laugh did strange things to her insides. Or maybe it was his warm body pressed against hers. Or…all of it.

  “You’re right,” he said. “You’d be unbearable.”

  CHAPTER FOUR

  LINDSEY GAVE A small laugh, apparently unaware that Todd was losing his mind. What
was it about this woman? In the short time he’d known her, she’d tried to sacrifice herself to save him—and her friend—she’d pushed through her pain and fatigue until she nearly broke, and she’d cried in his arms.

  She was part intellect, part strength, somehow fierce and vulnerable at the same time. Not to mention, easy on the eyes.

  He’d never met anyone like her.

  And he couldn’t stop thinking about what it would be like to get her into a real bed, naked and willing.

  He’d thought letting her sit in his lap was a trial of patience and control until he spooned with her under a sleeping bag, bodies touching everywhere. Well, almost. He kept ample space between his hips and her backside. The last thing he needed to do was give her something else to worry about.

  But damn, not only was she tough, she made him laugh. Fucking end-of-the-world picks. Who thought like that?

  “I do have certain skills you might find appealing,” she said, her voice pulling him along like a toy on a string.

  He clenched his fist to keep from touching her. “Oh, yeah?” A dozen ideas had already popped to mind, none of them PG. Completely disrespectful to her intelligence and other qualities, and proof that he didn’t deserve her now, or at the end of the world. “Like what? Can you build a shelter?”

  “A tax shelter.”

  Todd groaned. “I wouldn’t keep you around for your sense of humor.”

  “But you’d keep me around?”

  “Sure. Someone has to count the actual beans.”

  She gave a little snort. “Then I’m definitely your woman.”

  I wish. And where the hell had that come from?

  “What success were you supposed to be celebrating?” he asked, floundering for a distraction.

  “I recently landed some big new clients, so I was able to hire another full-time accountant to start in October.”

  He whistled. “Impressive.”

  She shrugged, her shoulders tugging at the sleeping bag. “I’ve had my own firm for almost five years and this is the first time I’ve been able to do more than hire seasonal help. It’s pretty exciting. And a little scary having someone depend on my success for their livelihood, to be honest.”