by Cora Reilly
“But, Mom, they’d want to know.”
“Promise me you won’t tell them,” she demanded.
I nodded slowly. What else could I do?
* * *
Two hours later I heard Father come home and another thirty minutes later, Mother’s light steps came upstairs and then the door to the master bedroom closed. She’d been alone. Was Father still downstairs? I left my room and went to his office on the first floor. After a moment of hesitation, I knocked. I needed to talk to him.
Our Christmas party would be in two weeks and now that Mother was sick, Gianna should be invited. She and Mother should get the chance to spend some time together and reconcile.
“Come in,” Father said.
I opened the door and poked my head in, half expecting to see him devastated and crying, but he was bent over some papers, working. I walked in, confused. “Has Mother talked to you?” Maybe she hadn’t told him about her cancer.
He looked up. “Yes, she did. She’ll be starting treatment with the best doctor in Chicago next week.”
“Oh, okay.” I paused, hoping for something else from Father but he watched me without a hint of emotion on his face. “I was thinking that Mother needs the support of her family now more than ever. Of her whole family.”
Father raised his eyebrows. “And?”
“I think we should invite Gianna to our Christmas party. She and Mother haven’t seen each other in a long time. I’m sure Mother would be very happy to see Gianna again.”
Father’s face darkened. “I won’t have that whore in my house. Maybe Matteo has forgiven her and even married her despite her transgressions but I’m not that kind.”
No, kind definitely wasn’t a word I’d use for my father. “But Mother needs every bit of support she can get.”
“No, and that’s my last word,” he growled. “And your mother doesn’t want people to know about her sickness. They’d only start to get suspicious if we invited Gianna. We’ll act as if nothing is wrong. You won’t even tell your sisters or anyone else, do you understand?”
I nodded. But how could I keep that kind of secret from everyone?
* * *
The house was decorated beautifully for our Christmas party. Everything was perfect. The scent of roast beef and truffled mashed potatoes carried through the rooms, but I couldn’t enjoy it. Mother had spent yesterday and the majority of this morning throwing up because of her treatment. With several layers of makeup, you couldn’t tell how pale she was but I knew. Only Father and I knew. Even Fabi didn’t have a clue.
Aria and Luca arrived only minutes before the other guests. They stayed in a hotel anyway so it wasn’t too hard to keep Mother’s state from them. Aria smiled brightly when she saw me and hugged me. “God, Lily. You look so beautiful.”
I smiled tightly. I’d been so excited when I’d found the silver dress a few weeks ago because it made me feel grown up and accentuated my curves in just the right way, but today my excitement over something like a piece of clothing felt ridiculous.
Aria pulled away and searched my face. “Is everything okay?”
I nodded quickly and turned my attention to Luca who’d waited patiently behind my sister for his turn. He gave me a quick hug. It still felt strange to have him greet me that way. “Father is still in his office and Mother is in the kitchen,” I explained. At least I hoped Mother wasn’t in the bathroom, throwing up again.
Luca walked past me and my gaze landed on Romero who’d been hidden behind Luca’s massive frame. My eyes widened at the sight of him. I hadn’t expected him to come. Last year Luca had come alone with Aria. After all, he was more than capable to protect her.
“Hello,” I said casually, sounding way more composed than I felt. I hadn’t quite gotten over my crush on Romero but I realized with relief that I wasn’t a quivering mess around him anymore. The last few months and weeks had changed me.
Romero
Luca had business to conduct with Scuderi and Dante Cavallaro; that was the only reason why I’d come to Chicago with them at all. And now as I stood in the doorway to the Scuderi mansion, staring at Liliana, I wondered if I shouldn’t have come up with an excuse. The last time I’d seen Lily she’d been a girl, and while she still wasn’t a woman, she’d grown a lot. She was fucking stunning. It was difficult not to look at her. It was easy to forget that there were still a few months until she’d be of age, easy to forget that she was way out of my league.
She tilted her head in greeting and stepped back. Where had the blushing, flirting girl gone? I had to admit I was sad that she wasn’t giving me her flirty smile, though it had always bothered me in the past.
I followed Luca and Aria into the house. I could hear Lily’s steps close behind me, could smell her flowery perfume and even see her slender frame from the corner of my eye. It took a lot of restraint not to glimpse over my shoulder to get another good look at her.
I spent the next couple of hours watching her discreetly as I pretended to be busy guarding Aria, not that I had much to do anyway. But the more I watched Lily, the more I realized that something was wrong. Whenever she thought nobody was paying attention to her, she seemed to deflate, her smile falling, her shoulders slumping. She was a good actress when she gave it her full attention but her few moments of inattentiveness were enough for me. Over the years as a bodyguard, I’d learned to be aware of even the smallest signs.
When she left the living room and didn’t come back, worry overcame me, but she wasn’t my responsibility. Aria was. I glanced at Luca’s wife. She was deep in conversation with her mother and Valentina Cavallaro. I excused myself. She’d be safe here. Luca was just across the room in what looked like an argument with Dante and Scuderi.
Once I found myself in the foyer, I hesitated. I wasn’t sure where Liliana had gone and I could hardly search the entire house for her. If someone found me, they might think I was spying for Luca. A sound from the corridor to my right attracted my attention and upon making sure that I was alone, I followed it until I caught sight of Liliana. She leaned against the wall, her head was thrown back, her eyes closed. I could tell she was trying to keep it together, and yet even like that, she was a sight to behold. Fucking gorgeous with long blond hair, immaculate skin, high cheekbones and slender figure. One day a man would be very lucky to be married to her.
The idea didn’t sit well with me but I didn’t linger on my inappropriate reaction. I walked toward her, making sure to make my steps audible so she knew she wasn’t alone anymore. She tensed, her eyes fluttering open but when she spotted me, she relaxed again and turned away. I wasn’t sure what to make of her reaction to my presence. I stopped a couple of steps from her, a proper distance. My gaze traveled over her long, lean legs, her narrow waist before I quickly moved on to her face. “Liliana, are you okay? You’ve been gone for a long time.”
“Why do you insist on calling me Liliana when everyone always calls me Lily?” She opened her eyes again, blue eyes surrounded by thick dark lashes that kept you mesmerized, and smiled bitterly. She had fucking amazing eyes, and amazing pink lips. Damn it. “Did my sister tell you to watch me?” she asked with a hint of accusation in her soft voice.
As if I needed someone to tell me. It had been almost impossible to keep my eyes off Liliana tonight. “No, she didn’t,” I said simply. She didn’t need to know why I had come to look for her. She was young and regardless of her immature attempts at flirting in the past, she was innocent.
Her blue eyes held confusion, then she turned her face to the side, leaving me to stare at her profile. Her chin wobbled but she swallowed and her expression evened out. “Don’t you need to watch Aria?”
“Luca is there,” I said. I moved a bit closer, too close. Lily’s perfume wafted into my nose, made me want to bury my face in her hair. God, I was losing my fucking mind. “I can tell that something is wrong. Why don’t you tell me?”
Lily straightened with narrowed her eyes. “Why? I’m not your responsibility. And last t
ime we saw each other you didn’t seem to like me very much.”
Was she still mad at me for stopping her from kissing me at her birthday party more than two years ago? What kind of man would have returned that kiss? “Maybe I can help you,” I said instead.
She sighed, her shoulders slumping. With that weary expression, she looked older somehow, like a grown woman, and I had to remind myself of my promise and oath again. Her eyes brimmed with tears when she peered up at me but they didn’t fall.
“Hey,” I said softly. I wanted to touch her, brush her hair away from her. Fuck. I wanted much more than that, but I stayed where I was. I couldn’t go around touching a daughter of the Outfit’s Consigliere. I shouldn’t even have been alone with her.
“You can’t tell anyone,” she said.
I hesitated. Luca was my Capo. There were certain things I couldn’t keep from him. “You know I can’t promise you that without knowing what you’re going to tell me.” And then I wondered if maybe she was pregnant, if maybe someone had broken her heart, and the idea made me furious. I wasn’t supposed to want her, I shouldn’t want her, and yet…
“I know, but it’s not about the Outfit or the Famiglia. It’s…” She lowered her gaze and swallowed. “God, I’m not supposed to tell anyone. And I hate it. I hate that we’re keeping up the charade when things are falling apart.”
I waited patiently, giving her the time she obviously needed.
Her shoulders began to shake but she still didn’t cry. I wasn’t sure how she did it. “My mother has cancer.”
That wasn’t what I’d expected. Although now that I thought about it, her mother had looked pale despite the thick layer of makeup on her face.
I touched Lily’s bare shoulder and tried to ignore how good it felt, how smooth her skin was. “I’m sorry. Why don’t you talk to Aria about it? I thought you and her talk about everything.”
“Gianna and Aria talk about everything. I’m the little sister, the fifth wheel.” She sounded bitter. “Sorry.” She released a long breath, obviously trying to get a grip on her emotions. “Father forbade me from telling anyone, even Aria, and here I am telling you.”
“I won’t tell anyone,” I promised before I could really think it through. What was I doing promising that kind of thing to Lily? Luca and the Famiglia were my priority. I had to consider the consequences if the wife of the Consigliere was sick. Would that weaken him and the Outfit? Luca might think so. And not just that, I was supposed to protect Aria. Wasn’t it my job to tell her that her mother was sick? That was the problem if you started to think with your dick. Then things always got messed up.
Lily tilted her head to the side with a curious expression. “You won’t?”
I leaned against the wall beside her, wondering how I was going to get out of that corner. “But don’t you think you should tell your sister? It’s her mother. She deserves to know the truth.”
“I know, don’t you think I don’t know that?” she whispered desperately. “I want to tell her. I feel so guilty for keeping it a secret. Why do you think I’m hiding in the hallway?”
“Then tell her.”
“Father would be furious if he found out. He’s been on edge for a long time. Sometimes I think it takes only the smallest incident and he’ll put a bullet through my head.”
She sounded fucking scared of her own father, and the bastard was scary. I took her hand. “Has he done anything to you? I’m sure Luca could figure out a way to keep you safe.” What the fuck was I talking about? Scuderi would convince Dante to start a war if Luca took his youngest daughter away from him. You never got involved in other people’s family problems. That was one of the most important rules in our world.
“Father wouldn’t allow it,” she said without hesitation. She really wasn’t the kid I’d first met. This world took away your innocence far too soon. “And he didn’t do anything, but he’d be furious if I went against his direct orders.”
“You know your sister, she’d never tell anyone.”
“Then she’d have to keep it a secret and she wouldn’t even be able to talk to Mother about it. Why is everything such a mess? Why can’t I have a normal family?”
She looked to me for answers I couldn’t give. We both had been born into this world and were bound by its rules. “We can’t choose our family.”
“And in my case, not even my future husband,” she said, surprising me. Something in her expression raised my walls. There were lines I couldn’t cross.
She shook her head. “I don’t know why I said it. This isn’t what I should be worried about now.” She looked down at my hand, which was still holding hers. I released her. If Scuderi or one of his men walked in on us, Scuderi would have a new reason to lose his shit.
“You know what? I will tell her,” Lily said suddenly. She straightened and gave me a grateful smile. “You are right. Aria deserves to know the truth.” Now that she didn’t lean against the wall anymore, we were even closer. I should have taken a step back and kept my distance, but instead my eyes were drawn to her lips.
Lily surprised me by walking away. “Thank you for your help.” I watched her turn the corner and then she was gone.
Liliana
My heart hammered in my chest, not only because I’d been alone with Romero and had barely managed to leave without kissing him, but because I was determined to go against Father’s orders. Maybe Romero had told the truth and he wouldn’t tell my sister and Luca about my mother, but really why should he keep a secret for me? We weren’t a couple, we weren’t even friends. We were nothing to each other. The thought buried itself like a heavy weight in my stomach.
It was better if I told Aria now. She’d find out eventually, and I wanted it to be from me. I headed back into the living room, where I found her deep in conversation with Valentina and a plate with prosciutto in her hand. Valentina smiled at me, but there was a flicker of pity in her green eyes. Did she know?
Of course, she did. Father probably had told his boss, Dante, right away, and Dante had told his wife. Had Father told other people as well? People he thought more deserving of the truth than his own family? “Hi, Val,” I said with a smile. “Can I steal Aria from you for a moment? I have to talk to her.”
Aria gave me a questioning look but Valentina nodded as if she knew why I needed to be alone with my sister. I linked arms with Aria and casually strolled through the room with her. Aria was tense. She knew something was up. I didn’t want Father or Mother to get suspicious so I tried to keep a relaxed expression. I caught Romero’s gaze across the room as he slunk back inside. He made his way over to where Luca and Dante stood beside the fireplace, but not without a last encouraging nod. Somehow that small gesture made me feel better. In the last two years I’d convinced myself that the thing with Romero was nothing but a silly crush but now I wasn’t so sure anymore. I liked his calm protectiveness. It gave me a sense of safety I longed for.
“Lily, what’s going on? You’ve been acting very odd all evening,” Aria whispered as we headed toward the lobby.
“I’m going to tell you in a moment. I want us to be alone.”
Aria’s face clouded with worry. “Has anything happened? Do you need help?”
I led her upstairs and into my room. When the door had closed behind us, I released Aria and sank down on my bed. Aria sat down beside me.
“It’s Mother,” I said in a whisper, not bothering to hide my pain any longer. “She’s got lung cancer.” Maybe I should have broken it to her in a less direct manner, but it wouldn’t have made the news less horrible.
Aria stared at me with wide eyes, then she slumped against the wall, releasing a harsh breath. “Oh God. I thought she looked exhausted but I blamed it on another fight with Father.”
“They’re still fighting and it’s making everything worse.”
Aria wrapped her arm around me and for a moment we held each other in silence. Mother hadn’t always been as caring and loving as a mother should be, but we loved her de
spite her flaws. “Why hasn’t she told me?”
“Father doesn’t want anyone to know. He actually forbade me from telling you.”
Aria pulled back, blond brows drawing together. “He forbade you?”
“He wants to keep up appearances. I think he’s embarrassed by Mother’s sickness.” I hesitated. “That’s why I didn’t tell you right away. I didn’t know what to do, but I talked to Romero and he convinced me to tell you.”
Aria searched my face. “Romero, hm?”
I shrugged. “Will you tell Gianna when you’re back in New York?”
“Of course,” Aria said. “I hate that she can’t be here.” She sighed. “I want to talk to Mother about it. She needs our support but how can we give it to her if we’re not supposed to know?”
I didn’t know. “I hate how Father’s acting. He’s so cold toward her. You’re so lucky, Aria, that you have a husband who cares about you.”
Her face transformed at once. It always did if I mentioned Luca. Love—she’d found it. “I know. One day you’ll have that too.”
I really hoped she was right. Life with someone like my father would be a hell I couldn’t survive.
* * *
With every passing day, Mother faded a bit more. Sometimes it felt like all I had to do was look away for a moment and her skin had already become a scarier shade of gray and she’d lost even more weight. Even her beautiful hair was gone completely. It was impossible to keep her sickness a secret anymore. Everyone knew. When other people were around, Father played the doting and worried husband but when we were alone, he could barely stand Mother’s presence as if he worried that she was infectious. It fell on me to support her while I tried to get through my last year in school. Aria, Gianna, and I talked on the phone almost every day. Without them I couldn’t have survived. And at night when I lay in the dark and couldn’t sleep from worry and fear, I remembered the way Romero had looked at me at our Christmas party as if he saw me for the very first time, really saw me as a woman and not just a stupid child. The look in his brown eyes made me feel warmer even if it was only a memory.
