Envious

by Lisa Jackson

  She forced herself to finish an article on the change in the school district’s curriculum, then accessed the Internet and, through cyberspace, found the obituary on David Sorenson of Dallas, Texas. So it was true. Her shoulders sagged a bit. She hadn’t doubted Luke’s word, but seeing Dave’s short life in an even shorter article was strangely sad.

  “Great,” she muttered under her breath. It was bad enough that she’d been forced to tell Josh about his father’s death, but now she was trying to get him to call his newfound grandparents and her negotiations with her son on the subject weren’t going well. Josh was interested, but wary. Tonight, if he didn’t do the deed himself, Katie would call them. She had to. The Sorensons deserved to know their grandson.

  She was grateful for the end of the day. At home, she started dinner and turned on the radio. Josh had a ride home from soccer practice, so she threw together potato salad and baked pieces of chicken in herbs. She wasn’t used to the thermostat in the new oven, so she was doubly careful, and as she unpacked what seemed to be an endless number of boxes, she kept an eye on her meal.

  The phone jangled just as Bliss, with Mason’s daughter, Dee Dee, pulled into the drive. “Hello?” Katie answered, waving Bliss and the girl inside. Holding the phone to her ear with one hand, she kicked open the screen door.

  “Ms. Kinkaid?” a gravelly voice asked.

  “Speaking.”

  “This is Ralph Sorenson.”

  Her heart dropped to the floor and she leaned against the cupboards for support. As much as she’d tried to bolster her own confidence and had told herself that she wanted to talk to Dave’s parents, now that she was down to it, she was apprehensive. She felt as if all the blood had drained from her body in that one instant. “Hello,” she said, trying to sound calm when she knew that her life was about to shred.

  “I don’t know how to say this but straight out. So here goes. I know about the boy. That he’s David’s.”

  “I see,” she replied tonelessly as Bliss and Dee Dee rushed into the room.

  “This is very awkward for me.”

  “Me, too,” Katie said and met the worry in Bliss’s eyes.

  “I did try to call you once, but when I didn’t get through I’d hoped I could call another time, when Josh was home. . . .”

  “Glad to hear it.” He sounded appeased and she was relieved. “Difficult as all this is, I have to tell you that I’m pleased to know that I have a grandson, especially now that Dave’s gone. It’s comforting to know that a piece of him lives on.”

  “Of course,” she replied, her eyes and nose burning.

  “But I can’t imagine why you chose to hide him from Dave for ten years. It would have done my boy some good to know that he had a son of his own.”

  “I didn’t mean to hide—”

  “I guess it don’t matter now that Dave’s gone—” The old man’s voice cracked and Katie crumpled inside.

  “I did try to tell him, before he left Oregon,” she said, shaking her head at the unspoken, worried questions forming in Bliss’s eyes. “He never called or came back to find out.”

  “So now it’s his fault?” The man’s voice rose an octave and Katie could almost feel his agitation.

  “That’s not what I meant.”

  “I should hope not, missy, because our boy’s gone. Gone. It nearly killed Loretta—” His voice cracked again and Katie wanted to drop off the face of the earth.

  “Look, I’m sorry about Dave. Really. He was a good person.”

  “But not good enough for you to contact and tell him about his son.”

  “That was probably a mistake,” she allowed.

  “Amen to that one.”

  “But I was young and scared—”

  “Maybe we should be running along,” Bliss said as she caught a glimmer of the conversation.

  “No, it’s fine. Please. Stay,” Katie mouthed, placing her hand over the mouthpiece of the receiver.

  “Okay. We’ll be outside.” Without another word, Bliss shepherded Dee Dee outside, found the basketball on the back porch and challenged her stepdaughter to a game of horse.

  “I know why you were scared,” Ralph Sorenson said. “Can’t say as I blame you, but the here and now of it is that Loretta and I have a grandson—the only one we’ll ever have—and we want to meet him.”

  “Of course you do,” she said, trying to stay calm. “I think that it would be a good idea.” That was stretching the truth a bit, but she couldn’t deny Josh the right to see his grandparents, or vice versa.

  “Then let’s do it. The sooner the better.”

  She’d forgotten how pushy Ralph Sorenson had been, how Dave had complained of an overbearing father. “Listen, Mr. Sorenson, I said I was sorry and I am. I probably handled this all wrong from the get-go, but the most important person in this situation is Josh. I just want to make sure that he’s strong enough to handle this. I think he is. And certainly, very soon, he’s gonna want to meet you.”

  There was another pause, then a sigh. “All right, Ms. Kinkaid. You do what you think is best, but remember, Mrs. Sorenson and I are here waiting, dying to meet Dave’s boy.”

  “I know. I’ll let you know when Josh is ready to meet you. Then, of course, I’d love you to visit. You can even stay here at the house, if you want.”

  “Well . . . that’s very kind.” The anger in his voice faded away and she thought she heard him sniff, then blow his nose, as if he were overcome with emotion. Her own throat was thick, her hands sweating over the receiver. But she wouldn’t break down, wouldn’t allow herself the luxury. It seemed that all she ever did anymore was cry, and she hated it.

  “Tell Luke that we spoke and assure him that he’ll get paid, just as promised.”

  “I will,” she said, wondering at the turn of the conversation.

  “I know he told me not to call, that he’d set it up, but ... Oh, hell, the missus and I, we just couldn’t wait for him.”

  “‘Wait for him’?” she repeated uneasily.

  “You’ll let us know when we can visit?”

  “Of course.” She hung up, mystified. Why was Ralph Sorenson talking about paying Luke for something now? A hint of an idea pricked her mind, but she didn’t want to think about it, couldn’t let that little niggle of horrid doubt burrow into her brain.

  Bliss, as if sensing the conversation was over, lost her game to Dee Dee, then, while Katie was rummaging in the refrigerator for a pitcher of lemonade, returned to the kitchen. Both mother and stepdaughter were sweating, their faces beet-red, their eyes bright.

  “I won!” Dee Dee announced.

  “Fair and square,” Bliss agreed. “But wait until next time. Then we’ll see who’s the champ of the court.”

  “I am, I am!” Dee Dee cried excitedly. She turned big eyes toward Katie. “I’m gonna be a big sister!”

  “A what?” Katie nearly dropped the pitcher of lemonade. She turned and saw a blush creep up Bliss’s neck.

  “That’s right,” Bliss admitted, her eyes shining with her secret. “I’m pregnant!”

  Katie left the pitcher on the counter and hugged her half-sister fiercely. “I’m so happy for you and Mason! When is the baby due?”

  “A long time off,” Bliss admitted. “I’m really not sure, but in the spring sometime. I’ll find out when I go to the doctor.”

  “A baby!” Tears threatened Katie’s eyes all over again. From the edge of her vision she saw Dee Dee gazing up at them both. “Oh, Dee Dee, how lucky you are,” Katie said. “I was never a big sister, always the youngest.”

  “Not me.” Dee Dee’s smile was back in place immediately.

  “Let’s have a toast,” Katie insisted. She poured them each a healthy glass, sliced lemons and tossed them into the liquid, added a couple of plump strawberries for good measure, then plopped ice cubes into the drinks. “Here.” She handed them each a glass and touched the rim of hers to Bliss’s. “To the baby and his big sister.”

  “No way. It’
s gonna be a girl,” Dee Dee insisted.

  “Okay. To the baby and her big sister,” Katie amended.

  “What? Nothing for the mother?” Bliss stuck out her lower lip until she couldn’t help giggling.

  “You get the best part. You get to be a mother,” Katie said, “and change diapers, get no sleep, worry yourself silly and ... I’m only kidding. It’s the most wonderful feeling in the world.”

  “I’m already a mother,” Bliss said, cocking her head toward Dee Dee. “Well, kind of.”

  The girl nodded enthusiastically and Katie was amazed at how quickly Mason’s daughter had taken to Bliss. But then, who wouldn’t? Bliss Lafferty was special. “Well, listen, I’m going to throw you the biggest, most lavish baby shower Bittersweet has ever seen!” She pointed a finger at Dee Dee’s small nose. “You can help me give it—you and Aunt Tiffany.”

  “Can I really?”

  “Really and truly.” Katie took a long swallow from her glass. “This is the best news I’ve had in weeks.”

  “Speaking of which,” Bliss asked as Dee Dee discovered Blue, and dog and girl dashed out the back door. “Who was on the telephone?”

  “Oh. That.” Katie’s good mood instantly shattered. “That was Ralph Sorenson.”

  “Who?” Bliss’s features pulled together as she tried to remember the name and came up blank.

  “Dave Sorenson’s father. You wouldn’t know him, they lived here only a little while.”

  “Sorenson? Isn’t that the guy who owned the place Luke Gates bought? I drew those blueprints for him and it seems like I remember the name.”

  “Small world, isn’t it? Anyway, Dave was Josh’s father. I just found out a week or so ago that ... that Dave’s gone.... I mean, he’s, uh, dead.” Her heart squeezed again at the horrid thought. “Died in a helicopter crash a few months back.”

  “What?” Bliss eyed Katie as if she’d just sprouted horns. “Wait a minute. Slow down and start over. From the beginning.”

  Fighting a losing battle with tears, Katie obliged and as she told her story, she felt as if a great weight, a burden, was slowly being lifted from her shoulders. For the first time in her life she understood the depth of a sister’s love, the special bond that exists between sisters in times of joy or sorrow. Who else would listen to her and empathize when she poured out her heart and unburdened her soul?

  Bliss listened and chewed on her lip. “Unbelievable,” she said when Katie had finished. “What’re you going to do?”

  “Talk to Josh and try to get him to accept Dave’s family. I was afraid that they might want custody or something, but I don’t think so. They just want to know their grandson.”

  “Well, if there’s anything Mason or I can do, just call and let us know.”

  “I will. But I think we’re okay, as long as Josh quits blaming me for not telling him the truth. This is my problem. I can handle it.” The words sounded much stronger than she felt, but she and Josh had weathered storms before; they’d get through this. “You know the old saying—something about that which doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.”

  “Words to live by,” Bliss murmured and Katie changed the subject.

  “Let’s get back to the baby,” she said, sliding into a chair at the table. “I think we should have the shower about a month before the blessed event. . . .” She threw herself into discussing the joyful topic at hand and turned her thoughts away from Ralph Sorenson and his interest in Josh right now. There was a chance that Josh knowing his paternal grandparents would be a blessing, but there was also the risk that it would turn into a disaster; that the Sorensons would become overbearing and insist upon being an integral part of his life. Katie told herself not to borrow trouble and was already mentally organizing the baby shower when the phone rang.

  “I’d better get it,” she said to Bliss. “It could be Josh. This is his first day back at soccer practice.” She snagged the phone on the third ring and silently prayed that the caller wasn’t Ralph Sorenson again. “Hello?”

  “I’m calling about the ad you ran in the paper.”

  Her heart nearly leaped from her chest. For a second she’d wondered if the male voice on the other end of the line belonged to Isaac Wells.

  “Yeah, I’m looking for a place to rent, so can you tell me more about the house?”

  “Oh.” Her excitement dropped. But she couldn’t be disappointed, because she needed to rent her cottage. She gave the man a quick description of the house and grounds, quoted him the rent and terms, then asked his name.

  “Ben Francis. I’m married, but me and the wife don’t have any kids yet. No pets, neither. If it’s not too much trouble, I’d like to see the place as soon as possible.”

  “I could meet you there at—” She checked the clock over the stove, mentally calculated when Josh would be home, and said, “Around seven tonight if that works for you.”

  There was a pause and for a reason she couldn’t name, Katie felt a moment of doubt, had the odd sensation that something wasn’t quite right.

  “That would be good,” he finally agreed just as the timer on the oven dinged loudly and Bliss, grabbing a pot holder lying on the counter, took over the duty of removing the steaming pan of savory chicken.

  “Let me give you the address,” Katie offered, ready to rattle it off.

  “No need. Got it this afternoon, from the sign on the front lawn.”

  She hesitated. “But I thought you got the information from the paper.” Was it her always-overactive imagination or was something wrong here?

  There was a beat of silence. “I did. Once I saw the sign, I checked out the ads in the Review to find out how much the rent was. Then I called you.”

  “Oh.” Why the devil was she always so suspicious? “All right, Mr. Francis—”

  “Ben.”

  “Ben. I’ll see you there.”

  She hung up slowly and read the questions in her half-sister’s eyes. “Someone who wants to rent the old place,” she said thoughtfully.

  “Someone you know?”

  She shook her head.

  “Ever heard of him before?”

  “No, but before I hand over the keys, I’ll check his references.”

  “Do that,” Bliss advised as she drew in a deep breath of fragrant steam escaping from the hot pan. “This—” she pointed at the pieces of chicken “—smells like heaven.”

  “Does it?” Katie was pleased. “One of Mom’s old recipes. I’m really not much of a cook.” She winked at Dee Dee, who’d entered the kitchen, followed by Blue. “Don’t tell Josh. He hasn’t figured it out yet.”

  Dee Dee giggled and Blue, smelling the food, whined near the counter.

  “Ever hopeful,” Katie observed.

  Bliss drained her glass and scraped her chair back as a station wagon filled with rowdy boys pulled into the driveway. Blue barked excitedly, clamoring to be let outside as Josh climbed out of the fold-down third seat and waved to his teammates. His face was flushed, his hair matted with sweat, but he wasn’t limping.

  “I think we’d better be taking off,” Bliss said. “Mason will be home soon and, unlike you, Ms. Kinkaid, I don’t have dinner ready. I think it’ll be take-out Chinese.”

  Dee Dee wrinkled her nose.

  “Oh, come on,” Bliss said, giving the girl’s slim shoulders a hug as Josh shouldered open the door and dropped his soccer bag in the middle of the floor. “I bet you’ll like the fried shrimp.”

  “You could stay,” Katie offered.

  “I’ll take a rain check. We just wanted to stop by and give you the good news.”

  “Congratulations.” They hugged and Katie’s heart swelled. When she’d first learned she had two half-sisters, she’d been wary, not certain of her feelings, especially since Bliss had been pampered and preened—John Cawthorne’s “princess.” But, being ever pragmatic, Katie had decided to make the best of the situation and from the minute she’d pushed herself into Bliss’s life, insisting that both she and Tiffany be ac
cepted, she hadn’t regretted it for a minute. Today was proof positive that a loving family—no matter how tattered and shredded and pulled apart—was the greatest gift in life.

  * * *

  Luke eyed the pile of dry earth that had been scraped away from the building site. Kicking at a dirt clod, he examined the dig and was satisfied with the progress. The excavation would be finished in two days; the setting of forms for the concrete foundation that would link the existing buildings was scheduled thereafter, and by the end of next week the framing crew would be at work. He wanted everything done immediately, of course, but knew better.

  As he squared his hat on his head and walked to the stables, he reminded himself that patience was a virtue—one that had eluded him for most of his life. He reached through the slats of the fence and twisted on the faucet for the water trough. Clear water gushed through ancient pipes and spilled into the metal drum, splashing noisily. Several mares lifted their heads at the sound. A light bay with black ears nickered in his direction.

  “Hello to you, too, Trudy,” he said and felt a sense of belonging, of finally having a place in the world he could call home.

  It was just a damned shame that he’d be doing it alone. For the first time since his divorce from Celia, he experienced a need to be connected, to be a part of something bigger than just himself. It was an odd sensation, really—one he’d hoped he would avoid for the rest of his life and that, he suspected, had more than a little to do with Katie Kinkaid. That mite of a woman had bored herself under his skin and he found himself thinking about her far too much.

  “So stop it,” he ordered. She was just a woman. Angry with himself, he twisted off the faucet, and saw that the stock seemed settled down. The foals cavorted, running and bucking and nipping at each other while their more sedate dams, ears flicking at each sound, tails forever switching at flies, grazed and generally ignored the antics of their spindly-legged offspring.

  It was a peaceful existence right now, though an influx of guests, ranch hands, and house staff would change that sense of tranquility in the months to come. But then money was money, and somehow this place had to support itself.