Make My Move

by J Bree

  It's quiet in the room for a minute, only Avery's shower making any noise and then she speaks, her voice quiet but firm. “I don't think you look like Joey. I think you look like Avery and she's one of the very best humans on this earth. So yeah, looking like your mom, like Harley, would have been great but looking like Avery is pretty fucking good, too. Stop having a meltdown over shit that doesn’t matter.”

  And in four sentences she grants me the absolution I do not deserve but so desperately crave.

  “Where the fuck did you come from?”

  She snorts at me and pats my leg like I'm a fucking child. “A drug addict. Or a meth lab, depending on which specific you were looking for.”

  I try to stay away from Joey.

  I try and I fail. Miserably, because when I wake up at 4 in the morning to a rambling text from him about how good the Mounty's blood will look on his dick when he fucks her bleeding corpse, it hits a little too fucking close to home for me, and I get out of bed to hunt the fuck down and end him.

  I don't have to go far, he's waiting for me out in the sitting area in the boys’ dorms, off his fucking head and rambling to himself about sluts and whores like he always does. His eyes are bloodshot and glassy, the liquid way they get when he's so fucking far out of his mind. I wonder if he's moved on from the cocaine and gone to heroin or meth; I wonder if he's going to burn himself out finally and I won't have to fucking deal with him anymore?

  Even off his head he can read me like a book.

  "You raise a hand to me and I'll tell Father all about her, your dirty little secret."

  I hesitate and it's the fucking worst thing I could do because he takes the action in and digs deeper. "Some little slum pussy from the Bay, no one would even notice if she disappeared. Avery is already on borrowed time, do you really want the little slut to die too?"

  So I don't raise a hand to him.

  And when he flies at me fists first, I let him. I stand there and I let him burn out some of his own rage against me and it's only when he has me on the ground, kicking at my ribs like he wants every last one of them broken, that Harley's shitty sleeping habits come in handy and he tackles Joey to get him off of me. It only takes one sharp hit to the face to knock Joey out, but Harley hits him a few more times just to be sure.

  Or because he wishes he could kill the asshole.

  Blaise looks fucking murderous as he helps me up, ducking under my arm to help me hobble back to our room even as my ribs scream at the stretch. "What the fuck are you doing? If he corners you then fine, take the fucking beating to keep Aves safe, but you were safe in our room. For fuck's sake, Ash, you're getting reckless."

  I shrug because it's easier to keep my mouth shut than to explain the intricacies of how fucked I am when it comes to my brother. I could just tell him that he'd threatened the Mounty, then he'd probably drop me and go back after Joey, but I can't let that happen either.

  We're all fucking doomed.

  I take a shower, slowly and fucking excruciatingly, but at least the pain puts a dampener on my dick for once and I don't find myself jerking off over the Mounty. Any other girl I wouldn't give a fuck about rubbing one out over every morning but when it comes to Lips?

  It only makes me crave her even more.

  When I finally shuffle out of the bathroom, Harley is waiting for me, sitting on the end of my bed with my phone in his hand and a frown on his face. He doesn't know the password to get into it but I doubt he’s go snooping even if he did. I trust him more than that.

  "Every morning your phone goes off and every morning I assumed it was Avery but it's not, is it? It's fucking Joey."

  I shrug and wave off Blaise because I don't need a fucking ice pack for my ribs. This isn't my first beating and I doubt it'll be the last, so I'm well versed in just how much this shit will suck for a few days. I don't care about the pain.

  "Just tell me, Ash. Tell me what the fuck it is that he has over you and we'll fucking figure it out. I'll go back to juvie to get him the fuck away from you."

  I huff at him but it sounds more like a wheeze. "Like Avery would let that happen again. It's nothing I can't handle."

  Harley drops my phone and stands up, hands on his hips to give me a savage look. "You weren't handling it. You were taking a beating and he wanted to fucking kill you. At what point would you have made him stop? Or were you so fucking ready to die out there?"

  I glance over at Blaise but he's looking just as fucking pissed off so he's not going to jump in anytime soon.

  My ribs hurt too much for this shit.

  "You're going to be late for your swim practice, forget about this."

  His eyes turn into slits but he grabs his swim bag and slings it over his shoulders. I think for a second that I've won and he's just going to leave but he pauses in front of me.

  "I can't forget about it because if I do you're just going to skip fucking merrily off to your own death to keep Aves safe and as noble as that shit is, it’s also fucking stupid. Who watches out for her if you're dead, Ash?"

  We don't normally do this emotive, open bullshit. I'm more of a sarcastic asshole type.

  "You do, and Blaise... and the Mounty. I wasn't going there to die, I was going there to kill him but then I remembered that Avery isn't the only person he's threatening. She's not the only person I'm trying to keep safe from him."

  I refuse to say another word about it, no matter how he and Blaise push.

  I spend the day in bed with no intentions of leaving for the day but then Avery blows my phone up the second Harley narcs on me and tells her what went down, so I drag my ass down to the dining hall for dinner. I don't want her going into a full-blown panic over Joey again so I do what I can to keep the pain off of my face.

  It's just my fucking ribs that burn.

  Blaise and Harley flank me in the line, snarling and shoving at anyone who gets too close to me which makes it too fucking obvious that I'm injured. It's the quickest way to get fucking jumped on my way back to our room later but I'm struggling to breathe too badly to argue with them.

  We take our usual seats and Avery slips her phone into her pocket with a concerned look at me which I brush off. I'm fucking fine. Blaise cracks a joke to lighten the mood which only makes things worse but at least Avery isn't fussing over me anymore so I'd say it's a win.

  The Mounty starts handing out drinks but I barely notice while I'm trying to choke down some food under Avery's watchful eye so she doesn't fucking stalk me over this shit for days. I don't think I should sleep in her room again, the torture of being in close quarters with the Mounty is too fucking much for me right now.

  My thoughts are broken by Avery's glass of juice landing in my lap as she gasps and lurches backwards. The Mounty's hand is still raised from where she's smacked it and I snarl at her, “What the fuck is wrong with you, Mounty?”

  “The glass is oily. Smell it. It smells like Harlow does after gym class. She rubs down with Wintergreen oil.”

  What the fuck is Wintergreen oil?

  The Mounty huffs at us all and snaps, “It's a type of natural aspirin and she's put it in your juice. She's fucking poisoned your drink, Aves.”

  Poisoned her drink.

  I can't think or move for a second while those words bounce around in my brain like a fucking pinball until finally I lift the glass out of my lap and sure enough, it's fucking oily. One sniff and the scent is there, not one I recognize but I trust the Mounty to know what she's talking about.

  I'll fucking kill her.

  “That. Fucking. Cunt.”

  The Mounty jumps to her feet and looks around the dining hall for the slut and the second he figures out what she's doing, Blaise does the same.

  I'm too fucking blinded by rage to join them.

  “Did you drink any? Are you sure it was her? I need to know I'm fucking killing the right bitch,” Harley says to Avery, his voice almost fucking vibrating out of him as he tries not to completely lose his fucking mind.

  “I'll han
dle this. Avery, go back to our room and get cleaned up. You guys need to walk her up and stay with her until I get back,” the Mounty says and then she's gone, stalking away from the table like she's going to actually murder the cunt.

  Not without me she's not.

  She's quick but even injured I'm faster and I grab her elbow and wrench her around to face me.

  “Mounty—”

  I'm not expecting the fire inside of her to be aimed my way but she fucking snaps, cutting me off, “How could you ever think I was in on this? How could you think I wanted to hurt her? You've spent the last year watching us together, do you really think I'd try to kill her?”

  Fuck.

  Goddammit, there's no way of talking myself out of this without just fucking saying, “I don't. I… fuck, you’re in. You’re family now. I'm coming with you and I'm helping you take Harlow out.”

  She looks at me as though she doesn't trust that at all, but I can't exactly blame her.

  I stand outside of Harlow's room for all of ten minutes.

  There's nothing that can be heard over the music in Chastity's room, no thumping or screaming, fucking nothing to tell me if I need to go in there and help. Then the door opens and Lips walks out, blood all down the front of her uniform that definitely won't wash out.

  Her arms are shaking.

  I glance back into the room and Harlow is a fucking mess but she's breathing, which is all that matters here. I have no doubt Avery could cover up a murder for us, but I don't want that shit on her plate right now. It wouldn't be smooth or effortless and I'm fucking positive that Lips would spend at least a little time in lockup which wouldn't go down well with... fuck, any of us.

  As we start walking she stumbles, and I grab her arm on reflex to steady her. I look down at her, the closest we've ever been, and she stares up at me with nothing but honesty. She walked into that room ready to do whatever it took to keep Avery alive and with zero apologies.

  I shouldn't, I really fucking shouldn't, but I can't help myself. “Come to my room. You can clean up there before you see Avery.”

  She doesn't hesitate to nod and follows me out of the hall.

  None of the girls watch us.

  When we get to the boys’ dorm, every last one of them does.

  I'm used to the stares so at first I think it's business as usual until I see the fucking phone. “Take a photo of her right now, Smithson, and you’ll never walk again. Do you think your father will still love you if you’re not on the State Track team?”

  That gets the fucking sheep moving.

  I unlock my door and usher her in, locking it back up just in case word gets back to Joey that she's here and he comes looking for round two. I don't think I'd be able to stand there and do nothing this time.

  I think I'd fucking kill him.

  Lips slowly walks around the room taking everything in. I know for sure that she's categorizing everything, planning out escape routes, and taking in all of the little clues that are left everywhere, because even though she's more subtle about it than Avery is, the look is the same. She does a little double take at the photo of us all in the kitchen, and suddenly I feel so fucking exposed having her here.

  “I'll grab you something to change into, the towels are under the sink. Use whatever you need.”

  She clears her throat but her voice is still raw. “I can go. Aves has seen me worse than this, she's fine.”

  I snort at her and flick the coffee machine on. I need the caffeine to get my shit together because bourbon would be too fucking risky right now. I'd probably do something fucking stupid like kiss her.

  “Just take a shower, Mounty.”

  I force myself to sit my ass on my bed and wait until she's in the shower before I move. Avery is blowing up my phone, needing more details than whatever Lips had sent her but I have none.

  All I know is that she got the job done without flinching, without stalling or second-guessing herself, and knowing that I have someone else watching Avery's back who would kill for her is a weight off of my shoulders. Someone Avery loves and is joined at the hip to, who can also bleed someone out is everything I never knew we fucking needed.

  I can't lie to myself anymore and pretend that's the only reason I want her around.

  Harley and Blaise have both text to check on Lips as well, and I answer them without my usual cutting sarcasm. I'm just... fucking tired. Tired of being angry and an asshole, tired of living by my brother's psychotic whims, tired of pretending that I don't want the Mounty girl around.

  I want her more than I've wanted anything else in my life.

  That in itself should be terrifying.

  It's not.

  When the shower cuts off, I wait a minute and then I knock and hand her a pile of clothes. She barely cracks the door open and I respect her privacy enough not to look, the temptation fucking vicious. I distract myself by making us both coffee. I know exactly how she likes hers thanks to all of the time I've spent in the girls’ room watching Avery fuss over the perfect brew.

  When she finally emerges I'm drinking my own cup on the end of my bed, trying not to stare at her and freak her the fuck out. I gave her my shirt because I'm fucking weak and I wanted to see it on her, even just this once. I'm sure she'll burn it later, or give it to Avery to get it back to me, but she's obviously not wearing a bra with it and even though the soft fabric dwarfs her tiny frame, I can still make out the curves that have filled in thanks to Avery's cooking.

  I want to touch them all.

  She grabs her coffee and takes a deep gulp, a total fucking addict like Avery and I both are. She refuses to look at me, her eyes tracing over the rest of the room like she's going to find some magic portal out of here. I can't hold it against her; I only have myself to blame.

  I keep my eyes away from her and on my own cup so I don't spook her. “Why did Joey call the juniors off last year? The real reason.”

  She gulps down some more coffee. “Someone from Mounts Bay found out about the bet. He's Joey’s dealer. Actually, he's the top of the drug dealing food chain. This guy didn't like the idea of me being a bet so he warned Joey off.”

  I don't like that she knows his dealers but then again Harley knows half of them from his time in the Bay so it's probably inevitable. “Why didn't Joey just find a new supplier?”

  “The guy owns all of the dealers. Everyone in the state leads back to him so he told Joey that he'd never touch an ounce of anything again if he didn't back off.”

  Well.

  There's a lead for Harley to chase up. She can't know the real kingpin, everyone knows the Jackal doesn't have friends, but whoever sells directly underneath him must know something about her... maybe even who it is that's threatening her, if it's not just the seniors and their stupid fucking bet.

  I nod again and set down my cup as she tips back the last of her drink.

  There's so much left to say to her now I have her alone, truly fucking alone, and yet I can't find a single fucking thing. Nothing.

  Except then she gets up to leave.

  I move without thinking about it, without thinking about the consequences of doing fucking anything right now, because I can't help myself. My fingers curl around her wrist gently. Enough that she can pull away if she wants to, but she doesn't. Instead she freezes, her breath stopping dead in her chest like she's under some spell and, fuck me, I'm caught under it as well.

  I don't want this moment to end.

  I don't want her to walk out of here and to go back to avoiding each other.

  I don't even know if she feels anything for me other than the mild tolerance she shows me.

  Then she takes a step toward me, her heartbeat throbbing in the vein beneath my fingertips and I pull her into me, closer and closer until I can smell my soap on her skin. I shouldn't, I really fucking shouldn't, but I cup the back of her neck until I finally just fucking look at her.

  She wants me too.

  There's no hiding the blown pupils, the blush across her chee
ks, and her heartbeat which is still thumping in her wrist. I'm fucking trapped by the desperation in her eyes, the need and the want drenching me until, finally, she draws in a shuddering breath and I snap.

  I kiss her like I've never kissed a girl before.

  I kiss her like she's the only fucking drug I'll ever need pumping through my veins, like I don't fucking care that she's going to be my downfall and that doing this is the end of everything I love and covet in my life. I kiss her like it doesn't matter that I'm betraying two of the most important and vital people in my life.

  I kiss her like I love her.

  She kisses me back like maybe she feels every last bit of that too.

  When her teeth catch my bottom lip and tug, I grunt, my dick going from half-hard to fucking throbbing in an instant. My hands both fall to fit over the curve of her waist, not daring to touch her anywhere else yet because the second I touch her it's fucking over. I'll be tearing these clothes off of her and fucking her into the mattress like I can keep her there forever, so I force myself to slow down, stick to safer areas.

  She feels too fucking good in my arms. I forget myself, groaning and lifting her up against my chest, and enjoy the feeling of her being pressed against me for a second before I flip us both over, getting her underneath me finally, fucking finally.

  It takes a second, her lips still desperate against mine, but then she freezes and I know it's game over.

  I squeeze my eyes shut at the same time she does; I don't want to fucking face this or the aftermath when everyone else finds out. Thank God I didn't lower myself down onto her, I didn't feel her underneath me, because the feel of her lips on mine will haunt me enough.

  I don't need to know what her grinding on my dick feels like.

  “I can’t,” she croaks and I nod, my eyes still shut.

  Neither of us move. I expect her to shove me off but she just lets me hover over her for a second while I get my shit together. It's not the rejection that burns me, it's the fact that I wasn't strong enough to stop myself in the first place.

  Now I've tasted her... no one else will ever compare.