Kai

by CORY CYR

  “You ready for bed? I was tired, but now the thought of you sleeping in my bed has me wound up,” he said while unbuttoning his shirt and pulling it off.

  God, he was gorgeous. Broad shoulders and muscled biceps well defined by deeply tanned skin. That one uncooperative curl hung in front of gray eyes that mesmerized me. I swallowed a sigh as I padded to the bedroom and grabbed my bag before heading to the bathroom.

  I washed my face, removing the makeup, and brushed my teeth before undressing. I changed into pink polka dot sleep shorts with a matching tank. I tied my hair into a ponytail and tossed my other clothing into my bag. Critiquing myself in the full-size mirror that hung on the back of the door, I could imagine Kai checking himself out as he stepped from the incredibly big shower, analyzing every ripple and indentation. His perfect ass and face.

  I was in the middle of my self-doubt when I heard him in the bedroom.

  I opened the door and found him lounging on the bed in blue briefs. The shades were open, along with the sliding glass door. The cool air made my nipples pucker as I slid in beside him. He turned toward me and ghosted a kiss across my lips, the scent of cinnamon toothpaste combined with body spray teasing my senses. My hands dusted his chest and abs, and I heard him suck in a breath when I came in contact with his formidable erection.

  “Is cuddling okay, or will it make it worse?” I asked.

  “Touching you is one of life’s greatest pleasures. Even if it’s just wrapping my arms around you. I can take it. I promise,” he stated with certainty.

  “Just lie with me,” I murmured as I pulled him down to me. I let his hands wash over me before we settled into snuggle mode. I could feel his cock hard against my leg.

  “Goddamn, Tegan, what you do to me.”

  “Ditto,” I whispered as I turned to face him. “If I kiss you right now. I’ll want more.” Kai confessed.

  “I feel it, too. But I can’t. Emotionally, it’s too much, and physically, it would be messy,” I explained. “I knew sleeping in your bed was a bad idea… for both of us. I love you, Kai.”

  “I don’t know if I can do this. Being next to you is too tempting when I want you so bad.”

  “We can do this. We can handle this,” I said as I rolled on top of him and swept my lips across his.

  I suddenly realized I had my full body weight on him, and self-consciousness made me scoot off.

  “What the fuck do you think you’re doing? You were kissing me and it felt good. Now get back here,” he demanded as he pulled me back on top of him.

  I felt my cheeks heat. “I don’t want to crush you.”

  “I’m a big boy, and you aren’t going to crush anything but my gratification. Now stop with the insecurities and allow me to pretend we’re having sex.” He laughed.

  He pressed his erection to my core. I spread my legs, and he slid up and down along my clit.

  I clung to his shoulders as his body molded to mine. “Good God,” I hissed. A wave of massive proportion was building inside me as I shuddered. I licked his neck, a drumming beginning deep inside. Undulating my hips, I arched to meet his soft thrusts. My climax crested, and I let out a banshee cry of release. My eyes prickled with tears as I came down from an orgasm so strong it rendered me almost lifeless.

  “I’m going out on a limb here and guessing it was good for you,” he announced in a breathy voice as he placed a kiss on my forehead.

  “Intense. It was intense,” I replied weakly. “I’m assuming it wasn’t enjoyable for you.”

  “Are you kidding? What we just did wasn’t about me, but you. I loved watching you fall apart. Just the look on your face is all the satisfaction I need. I hope it was good for you. I feel as though I pushed you into doing something you might not have been ready for. You told me as much, so I’m sorry.”

  It was difficult to hide my look of shock. “It’s okay, Kai. I would have stopped if it became too much. Just because I’m a hormonal basket case doesn’t mean I don’t want you. It just means I can’t have you, not right now. It’s not forever.”

  “It’s all right. I’d rather us be abstinent right now than take the chance I was with someone else during my booze binge. I had Dr. Stillwater shoot me up with every concoction there is for STDs, but that isn’t enough. Not for me. I have to be sure. I would never put any woman, especially one I love, at risk. I consider this appropriate punishment for me, and I hate that my carelessness affects you. The time will go quickly, and we’ve used condoms the entire time… with the exception of the first time. If you can be patient, so can I.”

  I frowned as I rolled off to his side. “As if we have a choice.”

  He faced me with a sexy grin. “I could loan you out to Reese when you’re ready and until I’m certified clean.”

  I slapped his chest. “Oh, you’d like that. I heard rumors about you three and your orgies. Are you sure you’ll be satisfied with just one woman? Because my days of multiple partners are over. Handling Kai Addison is plenty for me.”

  Us not having sex didn’t help drown out the war of voices in my head that kept telling me I would never be enough to keep this man. Eventually, he would realize he wanted a twenty-something girl with a flat stomach and tits that wouldn’t eventually sag. Kai might have thought he loved me at this moment. But moments were fleeting, and at some point, perhaps hearing the first unkind word to me from others about my weight, he would wake up and it would be over. Between that and my age, love would never be enough to keep him.

  * * *

  The sound of voices and the ocean woke me. Kai was talking to someone. I swung my legs over the edge of the bed and yawned, sleepily dragging myself to the bathroom to brush my teeth.

  I had the toothbrush dangling from my mouth as he leaned against the doorjamb, fully dressed.

  “You’re up. I set some breakfast out for you on the veranda. I wish I could stay, but work calls. See you later?”

  I nodded, spitting out my toothpaste. Grabbing a hand towel, I wiped my mouth. “Can’t you just stay and have coffee?”

  “No, baby, duty calls or, rather, Jasper. Reese was just here giving me a heads-up that the Brit is on the warpath. God knows what it is now. Trust me. I’d rather stay here with you,” he said, leaning down to kiss me. “Tomorrow, though, I think we can do some light activity in the gym.”

  I raised an eyebrow. “Isn’t that code for sex? I mean the working out part.”

  He chuckled. “You act as though I’m the only one that instigates our physical activity, and by physical, I mean sex. You, my dear, are just as guilty, if not only by association,” he teased as he wrapped his arms around me and kissed the back of my hair.

  I spun around as he captured my mouth. “I thought you were summoned to work,” I stated with a snort.

  “Okay, okay, I’m going, although reluctantly. I’d rather stay in bed all day with you.”

  “I think I know you by now, and once you’re done at work, you’ll head over to the gym to spend hours perfecting that already flawless body. You’ll never be the lounging in bed type.”

  His smile scorched my core with heat. “I think I’m changing. I don’t feel like I did before. To tell you the truth, I’m embarrassed about my past and the way I acted. You didn’t have to give me your love, Tegan, but you did, even after I abandoned you, and, baby, I know what that feels like. I’m lucky you saw past the person I was to the man I could be. You forgave me for everything, even though I’m having a hard time forgiving myself. It doesn’t matter how great I thought I was. Loving you has made me evolve into a real man.”

  “I kinda thought you were already a man. I mean, if that’s not a male appendage, I don’t know what is,” I said, jesting.

  “You must be feeling better since you’re making fun of me, Ms. Scott. I’m pouring my heart out, and you scoff. If I had time, I think I’d take you over my knee and spank that pretty ass of yours,” he taunted as he looked down at his zipper. “See what you’ve done. Now go eat some breakfast, then maybe go to
the spa or read a book on the beach. I’ll come and find you later. Then you can take care of this. I mean if you’re up to it.”

  I looked at his crotch as he shifted his cock. I supposed he wasn’t too happy going to meet the boys with a boner. I suppressed another snort as he left.

  I really wasn’t hungry, so I nibbled on some cut fruit and drank a cup of coffee. Finally, I got dressed and went to find Ronnie. Maybe she would want to relax on the beach. Our room was empty, so she was probably already lounging by the pool. I changed into a pair of clean shorts and a tank.

  On my way out, I noticed a few employees staring at me and whispering. I stopped and twisted my hair into a messy bun, then proceeded to the area I thought Ronnie would be. I felt frustrated, thinking everyone knew. I kept praying they would never find out. But deep in my heart, that fear of not being worthy of Kai plagued me.

  My eyes darted back and forth until they settled on Ronnie, stunning in a tiny bikini, oiled up, and stretched out on a lounge chair. I dragged an empty chair along the cement, screeching it loudly to where she was sunning.

  Ronnie looked up, shielding her eyes with one hand. “What are you doing here?” she asked nervously.

  “I thought maybe you’d want to hang out. I’m still on ‘take it easy’ mode, so I thought we could go down to the beach. I mean, if you want to.”

  Ronnie sat up, then stood, pulling on her cover-up. “Sure. The beach. Great idea.”

  She sounded anxious.

  I sat on the edge of the lounger. “I’ve known you for years. What the hell is going on? You have ‘worry’ voice.”

  “Look around, Tegan. You and Kai have been outed. Just a few know I’m your friend, and they already asked for confirmation,” she hissed.

  I sat tautly, watching Ronnie gather her belongings and stuff them into her bag. “That’s not possible. Only you, Kai, and his partners know. We walked along the beach last night, but hardly anyone saw us, just a few employees. I doubt there was some kind of announcement.”

  “Look, all I know is a handful of people have already asked me questions. I acted vague when I responded. But people know. It’s only a matter of time until this gossip burns through the entire island, and there are two media guests here that I know of. So there’s that. Now let’s get out of here. All eyes are on us, and I hate it.”

  Ronnie grabbed my hand, pulling me up off the chair. She was right. I could feel eyes boring into my back. She put her one arm through mine as she held her drink in the other. We strolled silently to the beach and found a private spot.

  “This is nice,” I announced as I laid out my blanket.

  Ronnie unzipped her cover-up, then sat next to me. “I think we should leave St. Willis. You’ve lost almost thirty pounds and look amazing. Between the miscarriage and the press, I’m concerned you could backslide, and I love who you’ve become. I’m afraid of what all the publicity could do to you. You’ve already gone through enough. You did what I brought you here to do. Falling in love and suffering a miscarriage was not on the list.”

  “I can’t just bail. Are you crazy? I need the time we have left here to be with Kai, and I want to lose more. I realize I have the tools to do it and keep it off, but I can’t just run away and hide.” I swallowed a sob. “And you met Nadia. How can you put a pause on what you’ve found with her?” I asked.

  Even though Ronnie was wearing dark sunglasses, I watched a tear roll down her cheek. I laid my head on her shoulder. “Nadia would understand. My loyalty is to you. My position exceeds its job description. I want to protect you,” she said, her voice cracking.

  “I know you want to shelter me from the storm, but maybe this is something I need to weather. I’m not that fragile anymore. I’m still worried about everything and self-conscious about my past, my body, and age. But you can’t help me with those. Only Kai can,” I confessed. “It would kill me if you gave up your relationship with Nadia because of me. Jesus, you’ve been looking for love for years, and I won’t have you throw it away for me. You can leave if you want to, but I’m staying.”

  “I really, truly love you,” Ronnie declared.

  “I don’t bat for the other team, although I’m thinking Kai would love watching.”

  “God, you just ruined my fantasy. I mean, the man is pretty, and maybe if he was wearing a dress… Never mind. That scruff and the fact he has a cock would ruin it.”

  I laughed as I knocked her shoulder. “It’s not just any cock. It’s my cock.”

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Kai

  “I’m here, so where’s the fire?” I asked as both Reese and Jasper pierced me with foreboding looks.

  “You better sit down,” Reese said, eyeing my chair.

  I got a bottle of water before I sat at my desk, noticing no files to indicate work. “Okay, what’s the big emergency, and why are we meeting here instead of, let’s say, your office?” I asked Jasper.

  “Because I didn’t want to get blood on my new carpet when I kill you,” Jasper responded in a low, menacing tone.

  “He doesn’t actually mean murder. He’s just mad.” Reese cut in.

  “I am capable of speaking for myself, Reese.” He turned to me. “You, my friend, have truly fucked us. And not in the sexual way. What do you Americans say? The beans have been spilled.”

  “Okay, enough of you two speaking in tongues. Spit it out so an average person understands. Treat me like a ten-year-old,” I said, frustrated.

  “You and Tegan. People know about your affair.”

  I bristled, projecting a defiant chin. The tick that normally surfaced when I was agitated began to pulse. The turbulence I felt in my chest wasn’t about me, but Tegan. “We knew eventually it would get out. I’m sure public relations can handle this. I mean, it’s what we pay them for.”

  “That is not what we pay them for. Their employment specifies something quite different than cleaning up when one of the founding members of VIP Fitness fucks a client,” Jasper barked.

  “Calm down. You always make a small thing into something huge. Try relaxing for one minute. I worry about you.”

  “Relax? You’re joking. I’d expect this bullshit from Reese, but not you, Kai. You have rules.”

  I stood, swallowing the last of my water. “Just stop. I’ve already heard this from you. It’s too late. I can’t just stop being with her. I love Tegan, and there isn’t anything God or you can do about it.”

  “The concerns aren’t coming from God or me. It’s our employees and clients. I’m fairly sure Ieisha began the rumors. She’s still furious with you, and you just added wood to that hearth.”

  “I thought we nipped the problem by releasing the chatterbox. I assumed that took care of it, along with the NDA,” I supposed.

  “You’d think, but there’s no doubt she told others about the miscarriage before we found out exactly which nurse it was. And by the time we terminated her, it just blew up,” Reese blurted out.

  “Look, reality is it looks unsavory to the other clients, and I won’t even go into how your relationship with Ms. Scott is affecting the employees. And by those, I mean the women we’ve fucked. I’ve learned the hard way that women and their pettiness is not a regional thing. It’s universal. And the females you’ve ostracized will go after your girl. I’m telling you this because I know what it’s like to have people you love crushed under the hand of your enemies. Enemies being the women you’ve done wrong.”

  This was the first time I’d heard Jasper speak about something personal. Maybe that invisible stick up his ass was from losing someone he loved. I could never have related until now. “So what do we do? If it’s already developing into a big buzz, it’s out of our hands. And if any employee dares to say a word to Tegan, they’ll be fired.”

  “Um, Kai, I don’t think you can do that, especially if it’s someone we’ve had sex with. Regardless of the NDA, just the press alone could hurt our business,” Reese replied.

  “Just another reason going to the mainland
to seek sexual partners would have been better.” Jasper chimed in.

  “Well, it’s a moot point since we’ve already done it,” I said with a loud sigh. “There’s no book written on how to handle this. So I guess we wait it out and see how bad it gets. I am sorry that I caused this. It was never my intention.”

  I was lying. I knew this might happen. Now I had another fear. That losing someone I loved would make me as bitter and jaded as Jasper. There was no reason I couldn’t have Tegan and my fitness club.

  * * *

  I had changed into a pair of dark-green chinos and a tropical print shirt. I knew she would look for solitude, so I strolled down to the beach. Rolling up my pants and removing my shoes, I sauntered toward her and Ronnie. Both her personal assistant and I frowned at the same time. She hadn’t liked me before, and now it would be worse.

  “Hey, babe,” I announced as I bent to kiss Tegan.

  “How did you know I’d be here? Ronnie and I were just going to get ready for dinner. I was about to call you and ask if you wanted to join us. How was work?” she asked.

  “Yeah, well… work was interesting.”

  “You are aware that your and Tegan’s relationship—affair, whatever you’re calling—is all the buzz of this place? I have spent the day trying to talk my boss into leaving before your liaison explodes into a major story. By the way, thanks for that.” Ronnie’s eyes narrowed as she scolded me.

  “Christ, Ronnie, enough. I’m sure he already got shit from his partners. It’s hard to believe because we’re together, it’s some major news story. We’re just two people.”

  “Yeah, two people. You do know he’s been fucking half his employees. Of course that’s only hearsay. I could be wrong, and Kai Addison is a pillar of virtue,” Ronnie spouted.

  “Enough. I know about his past, and may I remind you I carry my own baggage? Long after they’ve dissected Kai’s past and in time forgotten it, I will always be a porn star. Even twenty years from now, that’s all I’ll be known for.”

  “That’s crap. You’re so much more than that. I don’t care who says what. It will never change my feelings for you. Tegan, I need you to be stronger than you’ve ever been, or public opinion will decimate us. I can take it, but, Ronnie, I need you to look after our girl. I know you don’t trust me or even like me, but I have fierce love for your boss, and I need you to shield her from what may come. Can you put aside your animosity for me?”