Braided Strings

by Kaprice Potter

  So far, the only thing he could see on her face, though, was insecurity. She was still lying naked, while he had covered the most essential parts of his body. In sensitivity to her feelings, and understanding that she would be less receptive to their conversation if she wasn’t covered, he grabbed the blanket he had folded at the foot of his bed. She turned to her side and pulled the blanket over most of her body.

  “Well, sounds like you have a lot of thoughts going through my head right now. Please, tell me what else I’m thinking,” she prompted.

  That was his cue. Her anger always started with sarcasm, so now he knew how to play it.

  “Oh, yeah, I know exactly how many thoughts you’ve got running through that pretty little head of yours. Your mind is always going, but the bummer of that is that you never stop to think about the positive things, especially when it comes to yourself. You’re thinking now that I can’t honestly be feeling what I am for you. That I’m confused by the fact that you just introduced me to my daughter, and that I’m mistaking our friendship and a feeling of obligation with a desire to be with you. You’re also thinking that even if we were together, I would eventually find something about you that I didn’t like, and it would be a deal breaker.”

  “It’s not that hard to believe, Delaney. We’ve never tried anything more than friendship, and romance complicates things. We’ve also never lived together. You think I’m neurotic on a good day, what do you think is going to happen when you can’t escape it by going home? There’s so many little things that you aren’t aware of. What happens when they all add up, and it’s too much for you to deal with? I don’t think I could handle the heartbreak of losing you twice, not if we went down this path.”

  Delaney squeezed his eyes shut and pinched the bridge of his nose. He never did understand why she constantly undervalued herself, and insisted on thinking the worst.

  “You don’t know how wrong you are. I don’t think there are two people who know each other better than we do, and despite the fact that I’ve always told you that I love every little quirk you have, your argumentative nature has found a negative to that as well. You’re afraid that the intrigue is gone, and the only thing to make it interesting for me is the sex. You’re thinking the sex will wear off, and you’re not sure there will be anything left to keep me from getting bored and moving on. That’s not true, either.”

  “I just can’t. Why does this have to change things? Why can’t we just stay uncomplicated?”

  “I’ll leave it alone, Cricket, but I can’t promise to leave you alone.” He tugged the blanket away from her and rolled her to her back. If the only way he could stop her negativity was to stop her from thinking, that’s what he would do.

  Chapter 18

  Cara woke just after six the next morning. She was exhausted, there was no question. But the last two years between pregnancy and actually having Sutton had trained her internal alarm to go off before her daughter awoke. Sitting up quietly in Delaney’s bed, she watched him sleep. Their lovemaking had lasted until three a.m., and she knew he had the day off, so he would likely sleep a couple hours longer. Since she was not likely to sleep any longer herself, she let her mind wander with thoughts that had threatened to escape and ruin their evening the night before.

  From the moment she shared the existence of their daughter with him, Cara had been searching for the reason she kept the pregnancy from him to begin with. She had told herself so many reasons during their time apart, with communication being number one. She let herself believe that while he wasn’t contacting her, he clearly wanted nothing to do with her. Her pride wouldn’t let her be the first to break the silence. But from the moment she saw him again, she knew that wasn’t the main reason she kept him away.

  So she thought about something Keeley had told her. You can’t control everything, Cricket. Someday you’re going to have to share the wheel.

  That had been the crux of it, Cara knew. She had fallen into a codependent role with Delaney before she left, and when she had only herself to rely on, she found herself reflecting on the danger of her relationship with him more than once.

  Cara’s mother had shown her what it was like to have a man operate everything for her. Not that her parents didn’t have a happy marriage, but her mom didn’t seem to have any flexibility in the relationship at all. Her dad handled the finances, all decision making, and her mom’s overall attitude, it seemed. A lot of people made jokes about the old adage “if momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” Her house had been the complete opposite growing up. Too many times Cara had seen her mother feel put down by her father because he didn’t like her choice of clothing or hairstyle. He never meant to bruise her feelings, but no woman enjoyed hearing that something she’d changed was better left alone.

  Because of that, Cara knew that she would do everything in her power to never allow herself to feel controlled by a man. She wanted to be responsible for herself, never holding herself to anyone else’s standards. If people got used to something from her, they often came to expect it. Expectations meant she had something to live up to, and a higher chance of disappointing someone when she didn’t quite fit the mold. So, since she’d turned fifteen, she colored or cut her hair drastically every three months, giving her a form of disguise to remain hidden from the masses. She chose to remain silently observant, keeping under the radar in most situations. The few people that she’d allowed herself to become close to only saw what she allowed, and that was not nearly everything there was to see. There was less chance for rejection that way.

  Delaney was one of the few exceptions to that rule. She was an open book with him, and he knew her reasons for everything. She couldn’t say that he’d ever disappointed her, because in reality, he hadn’t. A miscommunication was what caused their separation, not any underhanded actions on his part. She trusted him completely. The problem was that she didn’t know if she trusted herself. Her being an open book to him meant that she put every aspect of her life in his hands. He could be, and usually was, the type of man to inspire her and drive her to accomplish anything she thought she wanted to attempt. But there was also the chance that given too much power, he wouldn’t even realize that he was putting her in a box on the shelf and shielding her away from who she was.

  So she would prevent the resentment. They would co-parent Sutton, as she’d agreed, and maybe they would have some fun with each other while they were at it. She would just have to put her feelings aside and not depend on him again.

  Chapter 19

  The next day Cara woke up to a quiet room and an empty bed. Friday after they had picked Sutton up from his parents, Delaney had been determined to spend the day enjoying the warm summer weather. They had filled his day off with a trip to the zoo, followed by dinner at an arcade restaurant. The day had been long, and Sutton had not gotten her nap. By the time they arrived home, all three of them were more than ready to sleep. And looking at the clock, Cara realized that her internal alarm had hit snooze as well. It was nearly eleven, and she was the only one in her bed. She left her room in search of Delaney and Sutton.

  When she walked down to the family room of her parents’ home, she again saw Delaney rocking with Sutton in the old familiar recliner. They appeared to be watching something on the History Channel, but Delaney turned his attention to her when she came around the corner.

  “Good morning, beautiful. How’d you sleep?”

  “I don’t remember the last time I slept for seven hours. Thanks for that.”

  “See, it won’t be all bad having a helping hand, will it?”

  Cara laughed. “No, but you shouldn’t spoil me. I’m still going to be on my own a lot of the time.”

  Delaney frowned, knowing that Cara was referring to her return to Chicago the following week. Neither of them knew how long it would be before she found a job near him, or how much longer it would take for her to settle everything in order to come home.

  “Cricket, how would you feel about coming to work with
me? Ryan needs a new assistant, and I think you would really enjoy working with him. “

  “I don’t think that would be a good idea. If I’m going to live with you, work is going to be your only escape from me.”

  “I don’t need an escape from you, you know that. Just think about it. Even if it’s only temporary, I’m sure Ryan and Phil would love to have you on their team. I bet we could talk them into a start date within the month.”

  “It’s Saturday. Let’s worry about that Monday. I’ll think about it until then.” Cara closed the conversation. She knew he was eager to have things organized, and she would be lying if she said she wasn’t as well. But not everything could change in a day. She had to take things one step at a time.

  Throughout the rest of that Saturday, Cara and Delaney lounged around her parents’ house. Delaney mostly watched television with Sutton in his arms, occasionally telling jokes and making strange faces in order to make her giggle. Sutton laughed at the faces, but gave him a solid stare of confusion with every joke.

  “Delaney, she’s barely a year old. I don’t think she gets your jokes yet,” Cara told him.

  “You’re never too young to develop a good sense of humor.”

  Cara just laughed and shook her head. Sutton was a generally happy little girl, and had rarely stopped smiling since she learned how to. But watching the smile she gave Delaney was making it difficult for Cara not to get choked up. She decided it would be best to leave them alone for a bit, and get a few things done around the house while she had the opportunity.

  ***

  A short while later, Delaney finally put Sutton down for her nap and went to find Cara in the laundry room. She was half day dreaming as she was preparing the wash, thinking about how Delaney’s hands had felt on her. She was wondering if it would be crossing a line to seduce him into another round that afternoon when he quietly snuck up behind her. Fitting his body against hers, he slid his hands under her thin cotton t-shirt. She jumped a bit at his touch, but then settled back against him.

  He continued to slide his hands up to her breasts, and cupped them through her bra. He slightly curled his fingers over the top and tugged down to release her nipples. Circling his thumb over the sensitive peaks, they hardened instantly. He continued to torment her while he leaned down to kiss the curve of her neck. She let her head fall to the side, and he gently bit the exposed flesh. Every muscle in her body responded, and she became moister than even the nipple play had caused.

  Then he slid his hand down over her stomach, into the waist of her sweatpants. As he had done the night before, he rubbed over her sensitive clit through her panties. She let out a low moan, and he increased both speed and pressure, still squeezing one nipple between two fingers. Her body started to convulse, and only seconds later she hit her peak.

  Then Delaney turned her around, slid the shirt over her head and unclasped her bra. Sliding the straps down her arms, he kissed the skin at her neck and shoulder once again. Lifting her to sit on the dryer, he moved his mouth from her shoulder to her chest, and sucked each of her nipples into his mouth. She could feel another orgasm building, this one slower and sweeter than the first. She removed his shirt, and took a moment to observe his body in the daylight. She couldn’t believe the attraction that she felt, and how much his body seemed to have changed over the last two years. She could see the faint definition of a six-pack, and his pectoral muscles seemed to be bulging more than they had in high school. She realized that he had been spending more time caring for his physique, a fact that she had more than a little appreciation for.

  As she was admiring his body, he moved in to kiss her. She wrapped her arms and legs around him to pull him closer. She was drowning in his kiss, feeling a haze of longing cloud her vision, and the warmth of her yearning spread again. They moved together, Cara lifting herself slightly off the dryer while Delaney removed her pants, then his own. The height of the dryer put Cara at the perfect position for him to slide his erection into her without bending or stooping.

  As he reached her entrance, she almost purred in delight. She immediately thrust her hips forward and took him deeper. The matched their pace to one another, which was more frantic than they had been the night before. Delaney caught her gaze and held it as he continued to push himself into her, harder and faster with every stroke.

  “Yes, Delaney. So good, don’t stop.” She was panting, her words almost broken. As he reached the end, she bit her lower lip and followed him over, still staring into his eyes.

  ***

  Unlike their lovemaking in the night, there was no post-coital cuddling. Delaney pulled himself away from Cara and replaced his clothing almost immediately, while she jumped off the dryer and replaced her own. In an effort not to appear callous, and because he really did want her again, Delaney pushed his body into hers and braced her backside against the machine. He used both hands, gathering her hair to move it to the side, and leaned down to her ear.

  “Just in case you wondered if I had enough,” he whispered, nipped her lobe, and turned to walk out of the room.

  Cara stood, a bit of a shiver having worked its way through her body, watching his back as he left. She thought she should be offended by the harsh attitude he was taking toward intimacy, that she should feel used. But she didn’t. She felt oddly content. How could he have known that such an aggressive and unsympathetic move would heighten her feelings of security? Somehow, the short ten minute session had left her feeling empowered and desired. She had ideas in her mind now of how to do the same for Delaney. If only she could work up the nerve to follow through.

  Chapter 20

  The rest of the day was uneventful, Cara cleaning and doing what she deemed “wifely” chores, while Delaney watched whatever happened to catch his eye on television. Everything felt normal, but it was not the type of normal that Cara thought she would be able to continue for long. She knew that underneath it all she wanted to be needed more than wanted, and supportive more than supported, but she also knew that could get suffocating. She needed her partner to accept those ideas, but also make her an equal in their relationship. If Delaney was going to remain her partner, they would need to have a talk about expectations.

  So after the laundry was done and dinner was on the table, she sat down across from him. He smiled and complimented her on the meal, and she felt like she was living in a sitcom. Even after a single day it grated on her nerves, and she was reminded of all the times that she told him she could never be with him if he didn’t argue with her. The appreciation she had only recently expressed for their commonalities was washed away, and she knew their discussion was going to have to be now or never.

  “Delaney, I’m not going to be able to do this honeymoon phase. It’s just not realistic to me.”

  Delaney just looked up at her and smirked. “I knew it wouldn’t last, Cricket.”

  “What do you mean, you knew it wouldn’t last?”

  “You’re not a housewife, and you’ve been acting like one today, so I’ve been playing my role the same. I knew that it wouldn’t take long before you were upset with me for not working just as hard as you were, though there was nothing to be done. You’ve been dusting clean corners for hours. Honestly, I’m surprised that you even made it this long.”

  “Oh, really? Made it this long? What exactly was there to gain with your little test?”

  “Nothing really, except if I’m not trying to please you, you open up more about what it is you want. I also knew that there was something going on in your mind that got you started with the cleaning, and it’s best just to let you work it out rather than push you to open up about it.”

  Delaney had a point. Cara had never been one to ask for anything, and the more Delaney did to please her, the more she resisted sharing what she wanted. He knew as well as she did that although they were perfect for each other, they weren’t mind readers. They were bound to do some things that irritated each other, and the only way to make the compromises was to communicate.


  And since Delaney was such a firm believer in communication, he knew all the tricks to make it happen without hostility. It reminded Cara of another reason they had never argued. He was too logical and always had a plan. It was clear that he paid closer attention to her than anyone else ever had because his plans with her were always foolproof.

  “Well played, Mr. Blake. I suppose now you want me to reveal all my hopes and desires to you?” She made the statement with a hint of playfulness, but she knew that he would catch the underlying irritation at being so well read.

  “No, love, there’s plenty of time for that. I just need to know what you expect from me, so I don’t make coming home to a crazed, angry woman a habit.”

  “You won’t be coming home to anything for quite some time I imagine, and if there are no expectations for a relationship, then you need to understand that I won’t be sitting at home waiting for you at the end of the day. We’ll live our separate lives, even though we live together. And that might not be permanent, either.”

  He chuckled. “I would think that would be the best solution. I know that Sutton will need daycare, and I expect to be just as involved in the drop offs and pick-ups. We’re partners, Cara, and that’s what I expect. I also expect that neither of us will fight any progression in our relationship, because we both know that things will happen the way they are meant to. But I won’t push you for more than you are ready for at any point. Now you need to tell me what you expect.”

  “Damn you, Delaney. Eventually you’re going to slip up and not be so perfect, but I will tell you what I expect. I need to be partners, equal and balanced, not a situation where one of us has a more active role while the other is silent. I don’t expect us to have the same responsibilities, I know there are differences. But when it comes to the house, I’m not going to play Donna Reed. We’ll split those chores; for example, I’ll do the laundry if you’ll do the dishes.”