Then She Roars

by Vanessa Evetts

  “I have one more thing to say,” Harry announced half an hour later as we sat on the bed re-fuelling with bad coffee and day-old reheated pastries.

  I laughed. “There’s always something.”

  “Well, two things actually. Number one … ” He motioned towards my alarm clock on the bedside table. “It’s 2.30pm Friday, which means—”

  “It’s the weekend,” I interrupted. “I love the weekend.”

  “You just wait. I have plans that are going to rock your world.” He held up both hands in the universal rock symbol and pulled a stupid face, which made me laugh out loud.

  “Can’t wait, as long as you promise to never ever do that again – whatever that was.”

  “What? This?” He raised his rock hands again. I trapped them in mine then placed them on my breasts.

  “Okay, I accept your terms.” He gave me a squeeze for good measure.

  “And number two?” I asked.

  “This one is more serious.”

  “Mm-hmm.” I had an inkling.

  Harry moved the discarded food tray off the bed, reached down and took my hands in his. “If you ever try that crap on me again, I won’t let you.”

  “I won’t,” I promised.

  “I never made that stupid agreement about only getting the good parts, Avery. That’s not the type of relationship I want or need.”

  “I know.”

  “From the very beginning, I said I was all in. I want you. All of you. I’ll take the ugly with the good for as long as I can have you.”

  “I know,” I repeated. “I understand now how important that is to you.” That tortured look in his eyes had been branded on my heart's memory.

  “You mean everything to me, Ave. Don’t shut me out again.”

  “I won’t. I promise I won’t.” I meant it. That was one mistake I never intended to make again.

  “Good.” He touched his lips to mine.

  “Mmm.” I deepened the kiss until he pushed me back and launched off the bed.

  “Okay – enough fooling around. It’s the weekend, and we have plans. Let’s go!”

  I watched in disbelief as Harry pulled an overnight bag out from underneath my bed and headed out the door with it. “Hey you, Mr Sneakster. Shouldn’t I pack that?”

  Harry turned back and raised it in the air. “Already done.”

  “Who—?”

  Harry jiggled his eyebrows, then picked his own bag up off the kitchen floor. Sally.

  “So, what would you have done if I hadn’t realised the error of my ways?”

  “There would have been an international kidnapping incident.”

  I laughed. Knowing where my head was at before the meeting, that would’ve gone down like a lead balloon, and he possibly would have been tied to it. “Count yourself lucky then, Prince.”

  Harry opened the door and motioned for me to pass, then murmured under his breath. I’m pretty sure he said something like ‘divine intervention’.

  I hesitated on the front step, causing Harry to bump into me from behind. “You forget something?”

  “Hey, why did you send me that text this morning?”

  “Because it’s true, and you needed to hear it.”

  “I know, but why’d you send it at that exact moment?”

  Harry put the bags down and placed his hands on my shoulders. “Did something happen this morning?”

  All his words came at me at once. I studied his expression and searched for an explanation that made sense.

  “Ave?”

  “I got lost in the dark.” It was all I could think of to say. “What made you send the text?”

  “I was prompted to send it.”

  “What does that mean? You were prompted?”

  “It means, I heard your name in my spirit and knew you needed to know how much I loved you. So, I text you.”

  “How did you know?”

  “I felt it. I don’t know, Avery – we’re bound together, you and I. God told me you needed me. There … I said it.”

  “Why didn’t you just say that before?”

  “I didn’t want to freak you out with spiritual stuff; we’ve been walking on some pretty rocky terrain lately.”

  “Okay. But for the record, it doesn’t freak me out.”

  “Did it help?” he asked.

  “You’re here, aren’t you?”

  “Well, thank you, Jesus!” He threw up his spirit hands and earned himself a side glance.

  “Whoa there! Calm down, Moses.”

  Harry laughed. “Too much?”

  “Just a tad.” I held my thumb and forefinger an inch apart then widened them for dramatic effect.

  Harry tucked his arm around my waist, pulled me close and pressed his lips to my neck. “Better?”

  “Don’t we have somewhere to be, lover boy?” I said, pushing him away.

  He smiled. “Spoilsport.”

  “I’m just excited about you rocking my world.”

  “I’m glad to hear it.” He picked up the bags, locked the door behind us and walked towards the car ahead of me.

  “Harry …”

  “Yeah, babe?”

  “Keep listening to the voice.” I’m not sure why I said it; I just felt like I needed to validate what he’d told me. “Your text ... it was exactly what I needed.” Thank you.

  Five hours later we landed in Brisbane.

  44

  “Okay, Mr Hot Stuff, so let me get this straight. Not only were you going to kidnap me and force me out of the country against my will … you were then going to force me to get naked with you in front of a stranger with a camera?”

  Harry smiled.

  “Did you even check with Suzanna?”

  “Of course.”

  “So, my oncologist and my best friend knew about this kidnapping scheme, and no one stepped in to save me?”

  “Sorry, babe, but you don’t have many supporters in your crazy camp. Suzanna even offered me drugs just in case.”

  “She did not.” I slapped his chest.

  “No, she didn’t, but wouldn’t that have been a twist?” He smiled. “And in the spirit of full disclosure, your twin brother even came over to the dark side. Although, when I think about it, your side was probably the dark side, so he came over to the right side.”

  The photographer laughed when I narrowed my eyes. “You’re so lucky I came around, Harry. This is a whole new breed of crazy.”

  “Do you mind if I participate in this convo? Even though it’s been fun watching so far?” the photographer asked. “You two are going to be a dream to shoot.”

  “Look, I’m not—”

  She held up her hand to stop me. “I can see how the idea of this is freaking you out a wee bit, but let’s break it down. When’s your surgery?”

  “Next Thursday,” I said.

  “So, you’ve got five more days with these gorgeous breasts of yours, and then they’re gone forever.”

  The truth of her words took the protest from my lips. I leant back against Harry as his arms encircled me.

  “True?”

  “Yes,” I acquiesced.

  “This sexy beast of a man over here …”

  My eyes grew wide. What the hell?

  “I’m sorry, Sandy – I just had to say it. Just for that look right … there!” She raised her camera and stole a shot before I could filter my expression. I didn’t know whether to run or punch her in the face.

  “Maggie, you’re such a clown. Ave – Maggie here is like my sister. We grew up together,” Harry added.

  “I’m Tracey’s daughter,” she confirmed with a warm smile. “I’m sorry, I’ve heard so much about you two – I couldn’t help messing with you a little bit.”

  I relaxed in Harry’s arms. “I love your mum. She’s really special.”

  “She loves you too, girl. Especially now my bro over here has claimed you as his one and only. And despite the crazy talk earlier, I can see the feeling is mutual.”

  “It i
s.”

  “Back to my original point without the dramatics. The man who loves you wants to spend this weekend celebrating your body … how it is now before you go under the knife. I personally can’t think of a better way to do that. This is my speciality, and I am wildly proud of the work we do here, especially with the journey Mum has walked.”

  I wrapped my arms around Harry’s as he pressed a kiss to my cheek.

  “I have a long-lens camera; I won’t be getting in the way. You two can be as intimate as you like. You can use the whole room and any props you find interesting. I’ll only speak up if I need to, and I’m happy to step out if I need to, too.”

  My eyes widened. What did she expect us to get up to in here?

  “Relax, Avery. By the time the session is up, you’ll be swinging those babies round like a stripper.”

  I laughed. I couldn’t help it. This girl was incorrigible, and from what I knew of Tracey, I imagined she was a chip off the old block.

  “Do you have the music, hot stuff?”

  Harry handed her a USB key.

  “Okay … well, how about you live up to your name, Hollywood, and take your clothes off?”

  “What? Now? Right here?”

  Maggie laughed. “We can start off slow … did you pack some goodies?”

  I glanced at Harry, oblivious and somewhat anxious as to what Sally had packed in my suitcase.

  “Sure did,” Harry said with a wink.

  Oh dear.

  “Alrighty then. Let’s get this party started.”

  As soon as the door closed behind her, I turned to Harry. “Is that chick for real?”

  “She’s great, isn’t she? Reminds me of Sandy,” he said, unzipping my bag and pulling out my first outfit. So much for starting slowly.

  When the first song came on and a half-naked Harry spun me into his arms, I was a goner. I couldn’t have told you whether Maggie was even in the room at any given point. This was our soundtrack and he had me mesmerised by the first riff. I wouldn’t say I was swinging my breasts around like a stripper, but Maggie was right about the fact that I wouldn’t care. Even when we were dancing, locked in a passionate embrace; even when Harry dipped me so low I could see his toes, and trailed his hands down my chest like in that scene in Dirty Dancing; even when he leant down and replaced his hands with his lips, I didn’t care. This was all about Harry and me, and as far as I could tell, we were the only two in the room.

  When the lights faded, indicating ninety minutes was over, I felt a deep yearning in my soul. “I’m not ready.”

  “We’ve still got five days, babe. It’s okay.”

  I wrapped myself around him, relishing the pressure of my breasts pressing against his chest, a feeling I knew I would grieve. “Thank you for this, Harry. It was perfect.”

  “I knew it would be,” he whispered.

  “Is she going to come in?”

  “No, she doesn’t like to come in after. She wants us to take the glow home.”

  “I really like her,” I admitted.

  “Good, we’re having lunch with her, Tom and the kids tomorrow.”

  Strangely, even with the intimacy of the moment she’d just witnessed, I didn’t feel uncomfortable with the idea.

  Harry’s phone beeped the minute we stepped out onto the street. He laughed and held the screen up to me.

  Oh, my god!!!!

  “Only four exclamation marks? That dip was worth three on its own!” I shook my head.

  Harry reached around my back and pulled me into his arms, and suddenly I was back in that room with my sexy heels and honeymoon lingerie, oblivious to the fact that the streets were full and we were now making a spectacle of ourselves.

  When a volley of horns and wolf whistling sounded, Harry pulled away and waved, which set off another round of tooting. He laughed, then stepped onto the road and hailed a cab.

  “I thought we were grabbing dinner?”

  He turned his smoky eyes on me, and I nearly dragged him back up to the sexy room to give Maggie a real show.

  This kind of hunger was not satiated by food.

  Thankfully a cab pulled up next to us to save me the ‘morning-after’ humiliation.

  45

  “You’re enjoying this a little too much, Harry,” I said as he lathered me with another layer of plaster. He gave me a few extra rubs for good measure, then lowered his lips to mine.

  “I don’t remember describing that step,” Meaghan, the sculptor, teased.

  Harry pulled back and focused all his attention on the two moulds under his palms. “Better?”

  “Behave!” I jabbed him in the side.

  “I have a feeling that’s in the ‘asking too much’ category,” Meaghan said, taking the bowl of milky water from my side and placing it on the bench. “I think you’re done, Mr Eager.”

  I laughed. Mr Eager. Ain’t that the truth?

  We were back in Maggie’s studio. She’d appeared for long enough to introduce us to Meaghan before disappearing into the editing suite to work on our photo shoot. The art studio was just as impressive as the photography studio. Harry told me she was planning to add a stylist and make-up artist to the team to further develop her services. She’d built a successful business with the sole purpose of reminding us to celebrate life in the middle of a storm and pour ourselves into the present instead of the fearsome ‘what if’s’.

  In a few weeks, we’d have a new album of intimate photos, a brand-new art piece for the wall and a pile of new memories.

  It wasn’t long before the cast was removed and set aside for drying, and we were headed out for lunch with Maggie and her family.

  There was no talk of sexy photo shoots or breast moulds, but there was plenty of talk of a young Harry terrorising the neighbourhood. I appreciated Maggie more with every passing minute and promised to keep in touch when we parted ways.

  Harry had a private conversation with her, hovering over a phone and whispering secrets while Tom tried to distract me. I knew not to pry when he swept me off for our next adventure.

  “So, this one is all Sally,” Harry said when we got out of the cab an hour later.

  “Ah ha.” I eyed him suspiciously.

  “These are her words exactly … ‘Before you flatten Boobland—’ ”

  “You did not just say—”

  Harry smirked. “Her words!” He held his hand up to stop me interrupting again. “Before you flatten Boobland, the girls must experience what it’s like to be truly free.”

  “She did not. You’re making this stuff up.”

  “Are you insinuating that I’d come up with a term like ‘Boobland’?”

  I shook my head. Fat chance. “Okay, what’s that supposed to mean?”

  “Follow me, and you’ll find out.”

  Harry was far too amused for this to be fun, but this weekend was about celebrating life and liberating myself from fear, so I’d follow him into the unknown and do whatever ridiculous thing the two of them had dreamed up. That was until my foot touched the sand and I caught sight of my insecurities wrapped in skin. Naked skin.

  “You cannot be serious!”

  “We’re doing this, babe.” He removed his shirt, hat and jandals, then looked at me with a dare in his eyes.

  “You’re not—” My words dropped with his shorts. I raised my hand to my mouth in shock when he entered the fray, then turned around in full view of the other beachgoers and did a little jiggle – a challenge in his eyes. Show me a little Sandy.

  I’d shut that part of myself off for so long, I’d forgotten she was in there. That beautiful, spirited woman who was willing to do anything, say anything, be anything. I missed her.

  Harry walked the rest of the way to the waterline and stood proudly with his arms raised to the sun, basking in freedom. His sexy tattooed behind beckoned me, reminding me of who I used to be before loss, before cancer, before fear.

  Come on, sexy lady, don’t leave him hanging … literally.

  Hearing her v
oice in my head, I braved the crazy and slid my dress over my head, kicked my sandals off then shimmied out of my underwear. There were people everywhere; there were open skies and open waters filled with the risk of exposure, and there were hordes of butterflies doing Olympic-worthy somersaults in my belly, but I ignored it all and walked, as gracefully as I could in sand, towards my man.

  When I reached him, I traced my fingers up his tattoo, then we walked into the water together.

  “I thought you’d gone and left me with all these naked people,” Harry said, pulling a face.

  I laughed. “I considered it, you nutter.”

  “You can’t tell me it didn’t feel good.” He drew me into his embrace and walked through the water into the deep.

  “This feels good.” I tucked myself in and encircled his neck with my arms, pressing myself against him. “But please don’t make me go back out there.”

  Harry laughed. “Maybe we could wait until they’ve gone.”

  “I don’t like our chances.” I motioned towards the beach where more bare butts and jiggly bits had settled in.

  “You afraid of a bit of skin, Ave?”

  “A bit?”

  Harry laughed again, enjoying my discomfort.

  “What if someone takes our clothes?”

  “No one’s going to take our clothes,” he said, but I saw a glimmer of doubt in his eyes, and it made me smile.

  “Okay, so is there anything else you have planned in the ‘Farewell to Boobland’ tour?”

  Harry grinned. “What? And ruin the surprise?”

  Half an hour later, we boldly rose out of the water hand in hand. No one had taken our clothes or any notice of our bravery. We even managed to sunbathe for a bit, making sure to keep our eyes glued to each other so we weren’t scarred for life.

  Before I knew it, not only had the weekend passed, but so had Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday, and here I was lying in a hospital gown preparing for surgery. The only difference was … now I was ready.

  Harry kissed me and told me he loved me as they wheeled me out, then stood back and took Sally’s hand, whose face was etched with emotion.

  “I’ve got this,” I said.