Catastrophe

by Deirdre O'Dare

  His balls drew up tight, aching with the need to let go. All at once, he felt Carl shudder and then explode. That was enough to trigger his climax. In a dim corner of his mind, he realized Carl stayed with him through the full sequence and waited until the last shuddering spasm to pull away. Either the other man took the exchange of fluids part seriously or he’d done this a few times before.

  They both relaxed a short while until heartbeats slowed and breathing resumed a normal rate. Then Zyl laid a hand on Carl’s side. “Flip around so I can see your face,” he said. “We need to talk about this a minute. Then we’ll see if I can walk you through letting the cat out.”

  As he moved to face Zyl, Carl’s face reflected a moment of absolute terror. “I can’t…I’m not…I…What if I get turned or shifted or whatever and can’t come back again?”

  Zyl put both his hands on Carl’s face, held him still and pressed a light kiss to his mouth. “I’m here with you, for you. It’ll be okay. I promise we’ll get you back if you do shift. I swear I won’t let you get lost in the process. I swear it on my sacred honor and my Were-kind oath. Try to trust me.”

  Carl blinked, a childlike hope and wistfulness softening his eyes. “Uh…okay. I can do this, can’t I? With your help, I can do it. Maybe I’ve always wanted to.”

  Chapter 5

  “Close your eyes again. That’ll remove one distraction. Just listen to my voice and let yourself relax and open up.”

  There was something almost hypnotic in Zyl’s low voice, a humming, purring quality that lulled Carl to a state somewhere between dreams and reality. He felt the light clasp of Zyl’s hands on his shoulders. That hold slipped gently down to his hands, then the other man rubbed each of his fingers, uncurling them.

  “The claws are there, waiting.” He moved his hands back to Carl’s shoulders and then drifted them slowly down his upper torso. “The fur is here, right under the covering of skin, the cat bones, the sharp ears, and keen fangs. Open up, and let it come out.”

  Something shuddered through Carl’s body, making him twitch and writhe as if he were having a seizure. He could feel his bones moving, changing shape and angles. Every one was still there, though none were as they had been. Vicious stabbing, tearing pain wracked him and then his skin began to stretch, cracked and split and changed. He opened his mouth to scream in protest, the sound that emerged was a yowl, a noise such as he had heard from mating cats, fighting cats, wounded and terrified cats. At first, he did not associate it with himself.

  Zyl’s voice came again, low and calm. “You’re doing it. You’re almost there. I’ve got you. The pain will ease in another heartbeat or two. Let it go; let it be.”

  Carl twisted and sprang off the bed, startled to land neatly on four feet, claws extended to find purchase on the loose throw rug at the foot of his bed. He twitched and wiggled, fitting a new body into a new skin, a sleek, taut skin pelted with soft tan hair interspersed with darker dots, double dots with brown rings and near-black centers.

  He looked into the mirror on the closet door and saw himself as he had never seen before. Although he wanted to speak, the sounds of words would not come out. He whined and yowled and screeched. He dashed to the mirror and swiped a paw against the glass. The reflected creature did not back off, just raised a parallel paw to meet his. He whined, frustrated, frightened and yet also exhilarated, admiring the gorgeous creature that incredibly was also him. Human thoughts sat awkwardly in the now cat-brain, until a gradual telepathic exchange began to smooth them. He shook his head, blinking.

  Zyl laughed, a soft purring chuckle. “He’s beautiful, isn’t he? It’s okay; you’re okay. Take a few minutes, walk around the room, just stay here, close to me. We’ll bring you back in a short while, just as soon as you can wear this body like a suit that belongs to you.”

  Carl obeyed. After the first step or two, everything worked smoothly. He jumped up on the bed, circled around and jumped back down. He went back to the mirror and lifted to stand on his hind legs, reaching his forelegs as high as he could. He could not quite touch the top of the doorframe.

  He dropped back to all fours and turned toward Zyl. While the words would still not shape, he could partly touch the other man’s mind, even with a mixture of cat and human words and concepts tangling in his own. ::I’m like you, only different.::

  Again Zyl chuckled. He spoke aloud at the same time he sent matching thoughts back to Carl. “Yes, I’m cheetah, and you’re ocelot. Sometimes they’re called the new world cheetah. Both spotted cats, both speedy hunters and unique creatures. Are you ready to change back?”

  Carl nodded, a gesture that felt odd in his feline form.

  “Shut your eyes again and think about your other self. Just ooze and ease and slip back into that shape. It may hurt a little, though not like the first change. Your body knows the old one best still.”

  There was a moment of disorientation, a feeling of stretching and twisting and adjustment. Then all at once Carl the man was back, standing naked on the now- scrunched up rug, Zyl’s hands reaching to clasp his.

  “I still can’t quite believe, I saw, I felt…It hurt like nothing I ever experienced, although once it was done, it felt right…strange right.” He shook his head. “I was beautiful, just like you, though a little bit different. Even though I never was drawn to the ocelots as much as the cheetahs, it fit. Somehow it fit.”

  “You probably knew on some subconscious level and maybe feared triggering a change if you spent too much time in proximity to them. I think over time it would have worked on you. It would have been hard, though, and probably scared you shitless. You might have just gone loco.”

  That made sense in a way. Carl thought about it. “You may be right. I remember seeing an ocelot that someone had for a pet when I was maybe eight or ten. I wanted to take it away, out in the desert somewhere, and run wild with it. We lived in Phoenix at the time and my folks were scared of snakes and stuff so we never went out much. Still the wilderness called me sometimes. Especially when I saw that cat. Of course, I was sneezing like crazy, so Mom got scared I’d have an asthma attack, and we left. I cried all the way home.” He stopped. “I’d forgotten that until just now. Weird.”

  Carl looked at the shifter then, or maybe the other shifter was more accurate. He stumbled into Zyl’s embrace. “Will you stay with me tonight? I’m not scared exactly, just kind of shook up, I guess. I mean, it was a pretty major thing. I’m still trying to sort it all out and find my balance again.”

  Zyl smiled and hugged him. “Sure. I wouldn’t leave you now unless you wanted me to. I had my parents and other relatives with me at my first shift, when I was about twelve years old. We always knew when it was time. It was a rite of passage for coming of age. The old tales about the full moon triggering are bullshit, although we did honor the moon and often made that first shift at a full moon. It was cool. Afterward, you weren’t a cub anymore, an adult, a man or a woman of the Were-kind. It hurt some. Not too bad, though. The longer you wait, the harder it is because your bones are solid and set and your whole body is pressed into a form.”

  Carl looked at him. “Can you shift, right now? I want to see if you’ll make me sneeze now.”

  Zyl laughed. “Sure.” He seemed just to flicker, shimmer, and change in a smooth, fast transition, going misty and then clearing as a cat instead of a man.

  Carl reached and stroked the cheetah’s smooth fur, rubbed along his neck and down the spine to his hips. Amazed, he looked at his hand—no rash, no itch, no stinging nettle sensation. He pressed his face into the plush softness of Zyl’s side, rubbed his nose and lips against the fur. Then he straightened. No sneezes, no itch, no watery eyes!

  “Okay, you can change back.”

  Another shimmer and shift and the man called Zyl stood in front of him again. Carl felt the smile stretch his face.

  “While I’m not quite sure yet, it’s starting to look like my allergies are way better if not really gone. That’s amazing!”

 
“Good. I was hoping it would work. I thought it was just your body’s reaction to the feline within who was struggling to get out and have its freedom. Even if you still have some problems, it should be a lot better, maybe in time go away completely.”

  “Just that relief makes the pain worthwhile. I’ll want you with me for a few more times until I learn how to control it and change, smooth and easy like you do. I won’t be afraid next time though. Even the pain goes in a few seconds. In time, will I be like you, able to do it almost like changing clothes?”

  Zyl gave a slight, fluid shrug. “I think so. Maybe never quite as easy, almost without thought, since you’ve had a late start. Still, it’ll get easier each time and the pain will fade, I’m sure.”

  Carl gave a huge yawn then before he could even begin to muffle it. “Oh man, I’m tired! Can you sleep at night in your human form?”

  “Of course. There are times I stay in one form or the other for days on end. Whatever I need to be to do what I’m tasked to do—except most Were-kind try not to stay in the animal form too long. Eventually, some of your humanity does fade and the beast takes over, bit by bit. Not that animals are not civilized in their own ways, the human ways are not the same, maybe less natural, and you can lose part of that.”

  “I’d almost like that. Well, maybe not. We have responsibilities and duties, and that’s why we’re this way, isn’t it?”

  Zyl nodded, his face going somber. “Yes, that’s true. I’ve heard rumors of some of the extreme animal rights groups planning attacks on several zoos, trying to break the animals out. That would be a disaster, for the animals and for the cities. If that threat becomes imminent, Were-kind may have to come out of hiding and stand with you for the safety of all. That’s one reason I’ve been here. Our leader, he that we call the Were-King, has many contacts and we’ll be warned before it happens. He felt it could come soon.”

  “I know. Our boss—the big boss, the zoo director—held a meeting yesterday with all the staff. Everyone is on high alert.”

  Then Carl yawned again. Zyl laughed. “To bed with you, spotted cousin. You’ve burned through a lot of energy tonight. Let’s rest now. We’ve earned it.”

  He suited action to words and dragged the bedspread and top sheet back. Already fading, Carl slipped into the bed’s cool, welcoming softness. Even with many troubling new worries, he sank toward a dreamless sleep, as Zyl’s arms gathered him close. Wouldn’t tomorrow be soon enough to deal with those issues?

  Just before sleep claimed him entirely, he dragged himself back to being semi-awake. “You’ll be with us, won’t you, if those attacks or whatever take place?”

  Zyl made an affirmative sound. “Yes, of course. That’s why a cell of Were-kind is located here in town. Taking part would mean we have to come out to humanity as what we are and that’s contentious. There’s been a group agitating the Were-King for this to happen anyway. I’ve heard he’s about ready to approve it. You said ‘us’—I take it you mean the zoo people, not the Were-kind. You’re now part of both, you know.”

  “That’s right. I am, aren’t I? I was thinking as a zoo person. I think we can make it a common cause, can’t we? I don’t want to give up my job. I love it, and if my allergies are better, it’ll be great. I’m ready to try to be Were-kind, too, though. Well, if they’ll have me. I know I’ve got a lot to learn.”

  Carl had relaxed into Zyl’s embrace, though he stiffened a little at the import of this discussion.

  Zyl’s voice softened to a near purr. “Okay, I just needed to know where you stand. In this crisis, we’ll serve a common cause, Were-kind will only answer to our ruler, not a human boss. In time, you may have to choose. Sometimes one cannot serve two masters.”

  He sighed. “Yeah, there’s that. I can’t make a decision right now, though. I hope I don’t have to for a while. This is all so new and unexpected.”

  * * * *

  Zyl knew at once when dawn began to lighten the sky. Although he would have preferred to stay, he knew he needed to be back in the cheetah area and in that form before people began to stir around the zoo. Carl seemed to be deeply asleep. Although Zyl hated to wake him, he wasn’t going to leave without a word.

  He pulled away from the comfortable warmth they’d shared, snuggled together, then he put his hand on Carl’s shoulder and shook gently. “Hey, I’ve got to go. I need to be out of here well before daybreak. You’re okay now, aren’t you?”

  Carl gave a sleepy mumble that sounded affirmative.

  After drawing the covers snuggly up over the other man, Zyl dressed and slipped out without a sound. He wasn’t sure how Carl would feel when he awoke. He might even think he’d just dreamed the whole night. That was okay, if it was the only way he could deal with the shock of learning he really was Were-kind. He’d come to terms with it. He was strong, even though he might not realize yet just how strong.

  Were-kind were not weaklings. The fact he’d managed to shift as an adult for the first time and then back into his human form proved that. Zyl would return after dark to check on him, of course.

  With that thought in mind, he slipped along like a shadow, cached his clothes in the hollow pillar, and vaulted over the fence into the cheetah enclosure, shifting as soon as he hit the ground. The other cats accepted his coming and going without much concern. Although none of them were Were-kind, he knew that at least one Were shared the quarters of nearly every species in the zoo.

  His cat-face stretched in a feline, toothy smile. If those misguided idiots who thought they were helping and defending by trying to release all the animals in the zoo showed up, they’d be getting the shock of their lives. When every member of the Were-kind cell in the city joined those living here, Zyl felt sure they could prevent much damage from being done. He just hoped the zoo employees didn’t get in the way and that none of them were hurt, especially one who had suddenly become real and significant to him.

  Chapter 6

  Carl overslept half an hour. He had to rush to get himself ready for work. He barely had time to think about the events of the past night. When he did, he needed to pinch himself. Could it all have been real or was it just a crazy dream? He’d had a few drinks—he was pretty sure that going to the bar with Zyl was real. After that, he could not be sure. Maybe he’d been stupid drunk enough to hallucinate.

  For a moment, he was tempted to try to shift into the ocelot form, there was no time. If he got stuck and could not reverse it, he’d be in a world of hurt. Nope, maybe later. Instead, he hurried down to the vet clinic to clock in and then began his usual rounds. Much to his relief, all the cats seemed healthy and calm.

  When the visitors began to trickle in, they, too, seemed boringly normal. A field trip group or two from a school or child care center, a few moms who perhaps home-schooled with their children in tow, some older folks—a very typical day.

  All of them seemed quiet, peaceful, and as non-threatening as they could be. Perhaps the whole animal rights issue was a false alarm. He hoped so. Violent confrontations had never been something he enjoyed. In fact, he’d do almost anything to avoid a fight, although if he had his back to the wall or anyone threatened the safety of his beloved charges, they’d find they’d awakened a tiger. Nobody would hurt one of his cats!

  Two days passed in a similar manner. Although Zyl came by to visit him briefly both nights, he did not hang around long or show any intention of initiating another sexual encounter or even practicing shifting. He only stayed a short while and pleaded tasks assigned by the Were-kind leaders, which he had to make his first priority.

  Carl fought against feeling hurt, even rejected. For a few hours that one night, he’d felt like he belonged, like he’d had found a place where he fit. Now he wasn’t so sure. Although he sensed Zyl was worried, the other man did not confide in him or offer any insights. Maybe he’d been wrong to hint that his first loyalty still lay with his employer and the animals in his charge, the regular animals, not Were-kind.

  Yet another day beg
an, apparently a carbon copy of the previous ones. Until about ten o’clock, that is. Carl’s watch said 10:12 when the first bus appeared, followed by several more. They were all older yellow busses with the names of various schools in black letters on their sides. Not uncommon in late spring as classes often took field trips to the zoo.

  Normally, though, visitors parked in one of several large lots outside the zoo fences. Why these loaded busses were allowed past the main gate, Carl had no idea. Outwardly, they appeared innocuous. Once they had parked in a much smaller lot outside the main building housing offices, the theater and some interpretive displays, passengers began to unload.

  Not yet sure why he’d been lingering near the front gate, a fair distance from his normal patrols of the feline exhibits, Carl watched, anxiety rapidly tightening his gut. These were not school kids or, if students, they had to be college age. Most carried backpacks and bundles under their arms, which might contain weapons, protest signs or even burglary tools such as pry bars and bolt cutters. A sensation like an ice cube sliding under his shirt descended his spine.

  Once all seven busses had discharged their passengers, well over a hundred visitors gathered in a knot. Soon a couple who looked older and were clearly some kind of leaders began to talk in low urgent tones, grouping their charges and waving in various directions, as if telling them what were to be their duty stations or posts. Carl had seen enough. He took off at a dead run for the security office.