Kids, Parents, and Power Struggles
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nudging
parental support
power of “no,”
safety issues
venturing out
Breaking off
Breaks, as anger management strategy
Breathing exercises
Briggs, Katharine
Bulldozing
changing to persuading
persuading compared with
Bullies
Button-pushing statements
Capability, assurance of
Cars, behavior in
Cautious first reaction, in children
Changing the frame
Checking rituals
Chess, Stella, Dr.
Child temperament
activity level
adaptability
coaching tips
first reaction
goodness of fit
intensity
persistence
profile
regularity
sensitivity
Cleaning rituals
Clothing tips, for sensitive children and
Coaching, benefits of
Communication
language problems
nonverbal
of standards
Competency
acknowledgment of
assertiveness
boundaries
getting along with others
independence
in stressed-out kids
Connection, significance of
Consequences
assertive behavior and
importance of
Consistency, importance of
Cooke, Betty, Ph.D.
Cooperation
Coping skills, See also Problem-solving
Cortisol levels
Counting rituals
Covey, Stephen
Criticism, dealing with
Cues
body
listening to
sensitivity to
for temper tantrums
Curiosity, Emotion Coach response vs. Intimidator
Cutting, Beth
Daydreaming
Death, impact of
Decision making, connecting vs. disconnecting
Deep breathing, temper tantrums and
Defiance
Dependent behavior
Depression
Developmental milestones
Diabetes
Diamond, Marian
Disagreements, dealing with
Disharmony
Disrespect
Disruptions, dealing with
Distractions, temper tantrums and
Divorce
Doherty, William
Dominating parents
Drug addiction
Ear infections
Eating disorders
Effective parents, characteristics of
Embarrassment, identification of
Emotional abuse
Emotional development stages
Emotional intelligence
Emotion coach
characteristics of
connection with children
intimidator vs.
memories of
responses of
role of, see specific types of skill development tips for
Emotion coaching, see Emotion coach
defined
goal-setting
impact of, generally
tips for
Emotions
assertiveness and
coping skills
family history and
identification of
intensity, management strategies
monitoring
naming
power struggles and, generally
recognition of
relationships, impact on
self-motivation
teaching children about
triggers, identification of
understanding
Empathy advice
child’s point of view
cues, listening to
gut reactions
resentment toward child
sensitive responses
successes and
tips for
worries and advice
Encopresis
Encouraging parents
Erickson, Martha Farrel, Dr.
Etiquette rules
Excitement, Emotion Coach response vs. Intimidator
Exhaustion, impact of
Expectations, dealing with
Extracurricular activities
Extroversion
characteristics of
coaching the extrovert, See also Extroverts, coaching guidelines
determination of
preference for
success plan
Extroverts coaching guidelines, see Extroverts, coaching guidelines
factual parents
feeling parents
Extroverts, coaching guidelines
overview
when they need activity and interaction
when they need questions to help them think
when they need to talk
Eye level communications
Falling apart over seemingly insignificant things
Family bed
Family values
Fear
identification of
impact of
Fearfulness
Feelers, see Extroversion; Introversion
characteristics of
coaching, see Feeling children, coaching guidelines
extroverted parents
gender differences
introverted parents
Feeling children, coaching guidelines
assertiveness
find solutions that feel right
reassure them that they’re liked
teach them to look at the facts
validate their feelings
Feelings, see Emotions
awareness of
clarification of
confirmation of
expression of
naming
real, search for
stress cues
validation of
vulnerability
Feeling style
Fetal alcohol syndrome
Fight or flight response
First feeling
First reaction
in children
in parent
Follow-through, significance of
Forgetfulness
Foster care
Frustration
Fuel for power struggles
medical factors
normal development
overview
stress
temperament/type
Gabrieli, John, Dr.
General anxiety disorder
Giving in
Goal setting
in relationship building
standards and
stress management
Goleman, Daniel
Goodness of fit
Gottman, John
Grocery store, stopping strategies
Growth disorders
Growth spurts
Guilt
dealing with
identification of
Gut reactions
Habits
Handwashing rituals
Harmony
Heart of Parenting, The (Gottman)
High-activity children
Highly intense children
Highly persistent children
Highly sensitive children
Hitting
Hitting behavior
Hoarding
Holiday, stress and
Honesty
How to Raise a Child with a High EQ (Shapiro)
Indecisiveness
Independence
Individual differences
acknowledgment of
adjusting boundaries for
Individual needs, understanding of
&nb
sp; Ineffective parents, characteristics of
Information processing
Injustice, identification of
Insensitive parents
Instinctual responses, recognition of
Intensity
awareness of
in children
management of
in negotiations
in parent
reduction strategies, see Intensity reduction strategies
stopping strategies
stress cycle and
Intensity reduction strategies
changing the frame
learning effective strategies
monitoring feelings
overview
setting standards
tips for
Intentional Family, The (Doherty)
Interpretations
empathic responses
standards enforcement
Interruptions
Intimidation, impact of
Intimidator
anger, physiology of
emotion coach vs.
impact of, generally
responses of
Introversion
characteristics of
coaching the introvert, See also Introverts, coaching guidelines
negotiations and
preference for
success plan
Introverts coaching guidelines, see Introverts, coaching guidelines
factual parents
feeling parents
Introverts, coaching guidelines
overview
when they need an opportunity to watch or listen
when they need space—physically, verbally, and visually
when they need time for reflection
Intrusive parents
Irregularity, in children
Jealousy, Emotion Coach response vs. Intimidator
Jessen, Lynn
Journal of American Medical Association
Jung, Carl
Justice, value of
Kohn, Alfie
Kranowitz, Carol
Language problems
Learning disabilities
Lethargy
Limit-setting
Listening
escalation and
introverts and
problem-solving and
Losing Control (Baumeister)
Loss, identification of
Lovies, letting go of
Low-activity children
Low-persistence children
Low-sensitivity children
Magic Trees of the Mind (Diamond)
Magic words
Manipulation
Medical factors
anxiety disorders
assertive behavior and
attachment disorders
attention deficit disorder (ADD or ADHD)
autism
coaching tips
depression
encopresis
Medical factors (cont.)
evaluation guidelines
focus on child
as fuel for power struggle
identification of
invisible
language problems
negotiation and
obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD)
pervasive developmental disorders (PDD)
seeking help for
sensory integration dysfunction (SI)
support and encouragement, significance of
team approach to
Medical practices, invasive
Mental-health days
Mildly intense children
Mistakes, acknowledgment of
Mixed messages
Motion sickness
Motor mouth
Moving, impact of
Myers, Isabel Briggs
Myers-Briggs Type Indicator
Name calling
National Institute of Mental Health
Needs, search for
Negotiation
childhood experiences of
coaching tips
giving in distinguished from
importance of
intensity, management of
listening skills
medical factors and
mistakes, acknowledgment of
with other children
problem, description of
problem solving
process
solutions
stress level and
temperament and
value of
Neural static
Neuroscience
New situations, dealing with
No, power of
Nonverbal communication
Normal development, fuel for power struggle,
Nudging
Nurturance, stress level and
Observation skills, in introverts
Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD)
Out-of-Sync Child, The (Kranowitz)
Overstimulation
Parental fighting
Parent-child relationship
building, see Relationship-building strategies
instinctual responses and
as process
reciprocity in
resentment in
significance of
Parent temperament
activity level
adaptability
coaching tips
defined
first reaction
importance of
intensity
parental, types of
persistence
regularity
sensitivity
successes with
trigger traits
understanding
Pausing, as anger management strategy
Persistence
in children
impact of, generally
in parent
Persuading
bulldozing compared with
changed from bulldozing
Pervasive developmental disorders (PDD)
Physical abuse
Physical activity, temper tantrums and,
Point of view, child’s
Potential solutions, in problem-solving
Power struggles, generally components of
coping with, see specific types of skill development
threads in, see Fuel for power struggles
Praise
Predictability
benefits of
temperament and
Preschool age children
assertiveness in
thinking and feeling styles
Preventive actions
Problem, description of
Problem solving
decision making
follow-through
importance of
problem, description of
solution
steps to
working together on
Professional guidance, need for
Projection
Psychobiology
Psychological type theory
Public behavior, standards enforcement
Punished by Rewards (Kohn)
Pushing/shoving behavior,
Questions
for extroverts
for introverts
thinking children
Quick-to-adapt children
Rage
Raising Your Spirited Child
Raising Your Spirited Child Workbook
Receptive-expressive language disorder
Reciprocal parents
Reciprocity
Reflection time
Reframing
Refusing behavior
Regressive behavior
dependence
difficult separation and disrupted sleep patterns
falling apart over seemingly insignificant things
fearfulness
forgetfulness and indecisiveness
lethargy and apathy