How Now Purple Cow

by Marja McGraw

  “Not a lot, but I have a general idea of what he looks like now. He took a page out of my book and he never let anyone take his picture. Okay. Of course we know he’s around six feet tall, and he’s still husky. The surgery he had after the fire actually makes him look a little younger than the rest of us. He has thick white hair, like you James. Oh, and his eyes are blue. Well, I knew that already.”

  James reached up and patted his hair. “Thick hair. It must be the Russian in us.”

  “He walks with a decided limp. They couldn’t repair his leg after the fire. He fell and broke it, and it’s a little shorter than the other one.”

  “Which leg are we talking about?” I asked.

  “Good question. As far as we know, it’s his left leg that’s shorter. And I’m afraid that’s about all I can tell you.”

  Coral looked quite serious. “Actually, that’s quite a good description. Now we have some idea of what, or who, to look for.”

  Carol sniffed. “Too bad your vision isn’t better.”

  Was there nothing these two wouldn’t snipe at each other about?

  Judith brought out a tray with cups and saucers. While she returned to the kitchen to bring out some fresh scones, Piper placed the tray on the dining table.

  After we were seated and eating, I looked Judith in the eyes. “When are you going to start at the restaurant?”

  “As soon as you start advertising the Afternoon Tea. Well, when we’re done being spies and you advertise. I already talked to Chef Nathaniel and he gave me some hints about the equipment in the kitchen. Which reminds me, I need to get a key from you so I can bake in the morning.”

  “I’ll get one made for you. By the way, when did you hire a gardener?”

  “He came around looking for work yesterday. He’s starting his own business. I think he lives on the next block. He’s got some great ideas about spiffing up the yard. Now about the scones – “

  “Okay, enough scone talk,” Chris said. “What’s next? What do you want us to do, James?”

  Piper spoke up. “Do you think you can disguise yourselves?”

  “Of course,” Carol said. “I saved all my old wigs from when I wanted to change my hair and the style.”

  Coral smiled an evil smile. “Those are from her freaky period.”

  Carol narrowed her eyes at her sister. “I have some wigs I’ve never worn, if anyone wants to borrow one.”

  “Bring them over with you next time we get together,” Judith said.

  James rubbed his hands together. “Now we’re ready to get down to business. We’re going public. We’re going to be everywhere and anywhere, and we won’t all be together. You’ll have to spread yourselves out and take turns following us. Do you think you can do that without being obvious?”

  “No problem for me and Chris. We’ve worked on cases before.” I was rather proud of us. “I thought we already had the schedule worked out.”

  Piper sipped her tea before speaking. “Plans often change in this business.”

  “This won’t be the same. This could be – probably will be – dangerous.” Rick had suddenly turned deadly serious.

  Constance, who’d been quiet, spoke up. “I’ve kinda taken a liking to you, old man. Not only are we in, but we can do this.”

  “Really, Constance? Truly?” She surprised me more than a little.

  Rick stood and held out his hand to Constance.

  “Wanna go for a ride in my good car, little girl?”

  Was that humor?

  Chapter Twenty-six

  The doorbell rang and Judith excused herself to answer it.

  “Be sure to check the peephole before you open the door,” Piper called after her.

  My mother-in-law checked before opening the door. Apparently it was safe. Her gardener stood on the porch.

  I studied him for a moment while he and Judith spoke. He appeared to be in his forties, tall and muscular, and he had dark hair. I tried to see if he had on a wedding ring. Maybe I knew someone who’d like a guy who liked spending time outdoors.

  “Hi, Randy. How’s it going? Are there any issues with the yard?”

  “Great, Mrs. Cross. I had a few ideas and wondered if we could talk for a minute. I won’t keep you from your company for long.”

  The man had a deep, sexy voice. I sighed, knowing there was no one I could fix him up with at the moment. Oh! Maybe he and Gloria, our waitress, would make a cute couple.

  Carol nudged her sister. “Hubba hubba.”

  “Hubba hubba? You’ve been spending too much time around Chris,” I said.

  Coral shrugged. “She likes ‘em young – the old pervert.”

  “Ladies,” Constance said, “you can have him. I like the older ones.”

  Rick grinned.

  “Did it ever dawn on you that maybe the gardener can hear you?” Chris sounded disgusted.

  “Sorrrry,” Carol said.

  Judith stepped outside with Randy and they discussed the yard. She wasn’t gone long.

  “What a nice man,” she said. “He’s got some marvelous ideas to beautify the place.”

  Chris, Sr. finally found his voice. “How much is that going to cost us?”

  Judith patted his hand. “We’ll talk later, dear.”

  Piper sat forward in her chair. “Are we going to talk about roses or assassins? Let’s get our priorities straight.” Obviously, she was a strong woman.

  That got everyone’s attention and no one said a word.

  “Okay. James and I are going shopping. Who’s going to follow us?”

  Chris raised his hand. “Me. And, of course, Pamela. Mother?”

  “Count me in,” Judith said.

  Rick stood and placed his hand on Constance’s shoulder. “I’m taking the little lady for a ride. We’ll stop for lunch. Can the rest of you keep up with us?”

  Chris, Sr. smiled his tight-lipped smile. “We’ll be right behind you, but we should probably take two cars.”

  He turned to Carol and Coral. “One of you can ride with me if you don’t want to squabble anymore.”

  Carol sputtered, unable to get a word out.

  “I’ll ride with you,” Coral said.

  “Head ‘em out and load ‘em up, or whatever that cowboy saying is.” Judith fastened a fanny pack around her middle.

  “Judith? You’re not taking one of your purses?” I wasn’t sure why that surprised me, but it did.

  “I figure this is a situation when we should keep our hands free.”

  “You’re absolutely right.” I stuck my cell phone in a pocket along with a couple of dollars. My purse could stay in the car.

  Piper and James left first. They’d parked on the opposite side of the street.

  While Chris pulled into a driveway to turn around, I noticed a rather nondescript light blue car pull away from the curb down the street.

  “Chris? Did you see that car? It looked like an old man was driving it.”

  “I saw it. We’ll keep an eye out and see if he heads in the same direction as the Hathaways.”

  Randy pulled his truck away from the curb right in front of us, slowing us down. We had to wait to pull out of the driveway, and then we couldn’t see around him.

  Judith stood in the middle of the street, waving at us. “Hey! Don’t leave without me.”

  Chris stopped and his mother climbed in the back seat.

  “Sorry, Ma. I was too focused on traffic.”

  “Yes, Junior, I know. I can’t believe you’d forget your own mother.” Was that distain I heard in her voice? Or sarcasm.

  Rick and Constance were behind us.

  My father-in-law’s car was the only one behind them, so I figured the twins must have decided they’d both ride with Chris, Sr.

  Rick turned off at the corner with the other car following.

  Randy turned right after two more streets, and…

  “Where are they?” The Hathaway’s car had disappeared. So had the old man in the blue car.

 
“Uh oh. Are we, or they, in trouble?” I asked.

  “We’ll find them.” Chris leaned forward a little and at each corner he slowed down and checked the side streets.

  “Anything?” Judith asked.

  Chris didn’t reply, but watched the streets carefully.

  “Ah!” We passed a street and he stepped on the gas.

  “Did you see them?” I rubber-necked, trying to check things out.

  “Yeah. They’re turning left, on to the main street.”

  Judith sounded frustrated. “So why didn’t you turn and follow them?”

  “Because the blue car is behind them. I’ll go up the next street and turn left at the signal. We’ll work our way behind them, but I don’t want the other man to notice us.”

  “My husband, the spy. Good thinking, Bogey Man. Keep a car or two between us.”

  “Do you know where they’re going?” I asked.

  Why hadn’t we thought to ask before leaving the house? If we were to lose them, we’d be up a creek.

  Judith leaned forward. “They’re going to the mall. Piper told me when we were in the kitchen. Are you going to borrow some wigs from Carol?

  “I am. I’m too noticeable with my long auburn hair. What about you?”

  “Ma doesn’t need wigs. She’s so short that she can blend in anywhere.” Chris was smiling, but Judith couldn’t see that.

  “Do not call me Ma anymore, Junior. And are you saying I’m just average? Is that what you’re saying?”

  “I’ll stop calling you Ma when you stop calling me Junior.”

  Judith waited for about a heartbeat before speaking up. “What about my question? Are you saying I’m just average?”

  “No, Mother. You’re anything but average, but you can get lost in a crowd because of your size. Although, you might want to borrow a wig or two, too. You know, to change your appearance.”

  She sat back and seemed to mull over his reply. “Good answer.”

  We’d reached the signal and watched as James drove by in their white, also nondescript, car. The blue vehicle followed right behind them. I tried to get a good look at the driver, but they went by too fast. I thought I saw a head of thick, white hair, but I wasn’t sure.

  The light changed to green and Chris turned the corner. Our spot in traffic was perfect. There was one car between us and the blue car, and one between it and the Hathaways.

  Ten minutes later, James pulled into the mall parking lot. The blue car followed along slowly, apparently trying not to be noticed.

  James found a parking space. So did the blue car. We parked facing away from them. James and Piper exited the car and headed into the medium-sized mall.

  My mother-in-law leaned forward. “That man is just sitting in his car. What’s he going to do?”

  “You’re getting frustrated, aren’t you, Judith? No one seems to be doing what you expect them to do.”

  She didn’t reply.

  Chris undid his seatbelt. “You two follow the Hathaways into the mall. I’m going to stay here and watch the old man.”

  Judith and I climbed out of the car and hurried to catch up with James and Piper. We slowed down when we remembered we weren’t supposed to know them.

  They sauntered inside the mall and began looking in windows. Piper entered a store that specialized in purses. James sat down on a bench outside the store, watching the other shoppers. That seemed like the normal thing for a man to do, to me.

  Judith passed the store and stopped to window shop at the next store. I paused in front of a candy store, but kept my gaze on James and the doorway of the purse store. Actually, I could see James in a reflection in the window. Every once in a while I’d turn and look at the entrance to the mall, thinking the old man would be along any minute with Chris trailing behind him.

  I picked up a sale catalogue from a counter and perused it while I walked to the bench where James sat, seating myself at the other end.

  “Did you see the man who was following you?” I spoke as quietly as I could, without looking at him.

  “I did.”

  “Why didn’t he follow you into the mall?”

  “More than likely, he’ll wait outside until we leave. Then he’ll continue to follow us.”

  I flipped to a different page of the catalogue. “How long will you stay inside the mall?”

  “Just long enough to make it look legitimate.”

  I glanced at Judith and saw her talking to a man. He turned his head slightly and I saw it was Randy. Randy? What was he doing here? I left my spot on the bench and approached Judith.

  She saw me and waved me over.

  “Pamela, you remember Randy. He’s here to look for a birthday gift for his wife.”

  “Wife?” Okay, so there wouldn’t be any fix-ups. I’d have to mention the wife to Carol, too.

  Randy held out his hand. “It’s nice to meet you, Pamela. Mrs. Cross tells me you’re her daughter-in-law. Maybe you can give me advice about what to buy my wife. She’s probably about your age; maybe a year or two older.”

  “Be glad to.”

  I turned cautiously toward the bench.

  James was gone.

  “Be right back,” I said, hurrying next door to the purse store.

  Piper was gone, too!

  Chapter Twenty-seven

  “Are you looking for your friends?” I jumped. Randy had followed me.

  “Uh, yes.”

  Of course, he recognized all of us. He’d know there was a connection. He pointed toward the candy store. “Maybe they have the right idea. I should buy my wife a pound of chocolates. She loves them.”

  “That’s a great idea,” I said. “Sometimes women appreciate sweets more than a new outfit or perfume. Better yet, buy her sweets and a new outfit.”

  Leaving him behind, or so I thought, I headed for the candy store. I stopped at the entry, unexpectedly, and Randy walked into me.

  He grunted, and I flew forward ending up next to Piper at the checkout.

  “I’m sorry,” he said.

  I nodded. “No problem.”

  Piper looked up at me in surprise, but there was no look of recognition on her face. Oh, she was good at what she did. I still thought spies would make good actors.

  “I’m sorry, ma’am. Just a little accident.” I quickly moved away from her and left the store.

  Judith stood outside the door, shaking her head. “So much for trying not to be obvious. I’m glad the old man waited outside.”

  A voice came from behind me. “So am I.”

  Turning around, I found Chris standing not far away.

  “What are you doing here? I thought you were watching the blue car.”

  “I was. He left, and I tried to follow him, but he lost me before he even left the parking lot. He must have realized he was being followed. We’ll have to use a different car. Besides, I couldn’t leave you two stranded here.”

  James approached us. He was listening. “If following him means stranding the ladies, then that’s what you’ll have to do next time. I’m sure they can find something to entertain themselves with here at the mall. However, I doubt that he left. He would have moved his car to a different parking place so mall security wouldn’t stop to talk to him.”

  “Couldn’t he just say he was waiting for his wife?” I asked.

  Piper had joined us. “Yes, but having security stop would call attention to him. As long as we’re in here, he’ll just keep moving around.”

  Chris pulled on his earlobe. “I should have thought of that. And that means he probably doesn’t realize we’re in the mix.”

  James smiled. “You’re learning, Chris. Believe me when I say you’ve got a lot more to learn, too.”

  Judith sighed deeply. “So what do we do now?”

  James glanced at his watch. “Now we go to a late lunch. There’s a sandwich shop just down the street. We’ll go there to eat and see if he follows. I would suggest you don’t all sit together though. We don’t want him to start
recognizing you as a group.”

  “Are you sure the man in the blue car is Grigori?” Chris asked.

  James leaned toward Chris. “Who else would be following a little old couple like us?”

  “Yeah, who else?”

  Piper set her shopping bag on a nearby bench. “Come here, Pamela.”

  I wondered what she might have in the bag, but not for long. She pulled out a floppy hat and handed it to me. “Put this on. It’s okay if he sees my red hair, but we need to hide yours. You need to change your appearance as often as possible.”

  Taking it from her, I took off my baseball cap and plopped the hat on my head. “I’ll remind Chris and his mother, too.”

  “I don’t know how much your husband can do to change his appearance, but Judith won’t be an issue. High heels and a wig with an alternative hair color will make her look like a taller, different woman.”

  “James is right. We’re learning a lot during this caper.”

  Piper smiled. “Caper? I hope you’re not really thinking of it in those terms.”

  “Not really. I just didn’t know what to call it.”

  “Don’t call it anything. Think of it as an assignment. You know, we’d be in a lot more trouble if we didn’t have all of you helping.”

  “Piper, what is Grigori really after? Can you tell me?”

  She studied me for a moment and seemed to reach a conclusion. “I’ll tell you this much. He’s after something that could put lives in danger. He wants information that James had in his possession in the old days. That information is still pertinent, even today. That’s about as much as I can tell you. When this is over you’ll understand.”

  I nodded.

  “Please emphasize to everyone that this isn’t a caper, or a game. There are at least a few lives at stake here. Yes, James and I are in danger, as well as Rick, but there are others, too.”

  She glanced at her husband and walked to his side, taking hold of his arm. He patted her hand before reaching into his pocket and pulling out his trusty cigar. Taking a look around the mall, he gave the stogie a sad look and shoved it back in his pocket. I’d never seen him light it. Did he really smoke?