Reign on Me

by Zoe Devereaux

  “You’re right. Brother Harris, Brother Simms, Brother Peters, Sister Helen---”

  “In other words, Saint Joe’s entire congregation is on the damn bus, and there’s no point in you worrying your pretty little head off,” he quipped sarcastically, raising a brow, and then hurled the racket towards the box and missed. Ignoring her glare, he sauntered to it before piling it on top. “So, let’s agree to get this cleaned up, we’ll take off, and I’ll make sure that you get home.” He passed her an inquisitive look, and a note of hope played in his eyes. “You in agreement with that?”

  “Of course, I am.” Raising her chin, she ignored her thundering heartbeat. “That will be fine. But, I’m going to have to talk to the others before we leave and explain to them what’s going on.”

  Forty-five minutes later, they’d loaded several boxes into the Viper’s trunk and were traveling again.

  The sky was dark and starless.

  Early evening had finally arrived, she mulled, watching the trees pass from the passenger’s window, and straightened in the seat. Now, they were venturing through an area that didn’t look quite that safe or friendly. As the streetlight slanted inside the car, she glanced at him. While he tried to appear relaxed, it was clear that he wasn’t.

  “What is it?” she asked with concern.

  “No matter how many times I come through this damn place, I always get the same feeling.” His jaw tightened. “The ugly sights of my beginning breathe here.”

  She resisted the urge to touch him. At this point, her comfort was probably something that he wouldn’t accept, she realized, seeing him tense further. Still, she treaded forward cautiously. “Is this the place where you grew up?”

  Taking his eyes from the road briefly, he glanced at her. “You’re not really paying attention to my words are you? I said, ‘the ugly sights of my beginning’.”

  She started when he whipped from the road and guided the Viper to the wide shoulder. Leaving the car idling, he glanced across the street. An old run-down, dilapidated gas station stood directly from their position, about a hundred feet away. Surprisingly, it was still operable and in business, despite its bad conditions. But, then, again, maybe not since in poor metropolitan cities like this, they didn’t receive much care or financial assistance.

  In badly faded letters, the store’s sign was barely legible. But, still, she was able to make out the words, Juke Joint. “What is that place?” she asked, fearing his answer. “Did you go there a lot as a boy?”

  Before he could hide it, the naked pain flashed across his face. Now, his words were hardly audible, and it seemed that it was difficult for him to drag them out. “Let’s just say it’s my fucked up version of a hospital.”

  “A hospital?” she frowned, shaking her head in confusion. “I’m not sure that I understand.”

  “I was left there as a baby,” he mumbled, and his words sounded distant. “All perfectly rolled up in my little baby blanket on the nasty restroom floor.”

  The shock tore through her. “You were abandoned?”

  “Even from the very beginning, I suppose that no one really wanted me.” He sighed. “My grandfather wasn’t too keen on my arrival. Hell, I was the product of an extra-marital affair, and that’s pure scandal for a blueblood family like his. So, he resorted to some horrible methods to ensure that I was out of sight and out of mind. His option was to leave me here.”

  “I’m so sorry,” she whispered.

  “A woman name Crystal took me home with her. A washed out junkie with her own set of problems.” He glanced over at her. “In a weird and twisted way, I guess she loved me, or at least, her version of it.”

  However, he didn’t sound convinced. It was more that he was using his words to justify her shoddy treatment of him.

  “This Crystal woman---where is she?” she hedged carefully. “Is she still alive?”

  He gave a humorless laugh. “I guess it depends on what you mean by ‘alive’. Is she breathing yes? Is she living? The poisonous needle that she shoots up her arm is her salvation.”

  “She’s a drug addict. How was she capable of taking care of a child, especially considering that she had an addiction?”

  “It was more of me taking care of her. But, she didn’t see it that way back then, and she doesn’t see it that way now.”

  Falling silent, he pulled from the wide shoulder, and then, they were on the road again. Minutes later, they were traveling through the area where the center was located, Drake’s Run. They cruised past the project housing, and before she knew it, he was parking the car again.

  Now, they sat across the street from a rambling two-story, white clapboard house, and it stood dead center of the street. There were people out and about, standing along the street corners or sitting in idling cars.

  A group of young women sat on the house’s porch, some of them puffing on cigarettes, and the others sat on the porch’s railings laughing and talking loudly. They ranged in different races, sizes, and shapes. Their attire was a bit too provocative, she mulled, growing uncomfortable.

  “What is this place? I’m getting a bad vibe from it,” she admitted, looking ahead, and noticed as the man on the street quickly exchanged a small white packet with someone sitting in a car. “It doesn’t seem like a nice place to be for all of those young women sitting on that porch.”

  “Drake’s Run is a fucked up place.”

  “You grew up here. Which place was your house?”

  Staring at her first, he then pointed to the old rambling house. “There’s home…the place that shaped me into the heartless and unfeeling bastard that I am today. Welcome to the Den---the birthplace for whores, addicts, and sinners.”

  Her sharp intake of breath indicated her shock.

  Startled, she turned her full attention to the house.

  The surprise surged through her.

  Clothed in ripped denim shorts and a blue tank top, a petite blond stood dead center of the porch and conversed with one of the girls. Late fifties or early sixties, the woman was obviously the person in authority. While that was so, her features showed a life of hard times. Even from this distance, one could see that she was completely washed out.

  Life hadn’t been kind to her.

  Obviously, the woman was issuing back her brand of nastiness within it, she thought, growing further uneasy. “The woman---is she a female pimp?”

  “The woman that you see standing on the porch,” he quipped tightly, peering past her, and watched as the woman summoned one of the women away from the rest. “…ruining and destroying that woman’s very virtue. She destroyed me from a very young tender age. Meet my fucked-up pseudo-mother, Crystal.”

  “T—that’s Crystal?” she stammered, swinging her gaze to the porch again. Shell-shocked, she watched as one of the women stepped back inside the house, and it seemed that she was in a tad bit of a hurry. “She’s the one that found you in the gas station?”

  “I wouldn’t exactly safe found. My grandfather paid her to take me off her hands. A measly five thousand dollars, but in a junkie’s world it’s like having a million. Back then, I was taught that I wasn’t worth much.” He bit back an expletive. “I’d give anything if it’d been someone else but her. Growing up as a kid, being abused in ways that are unimaginable, a lot of days I wished that I was dead. Something, deep inside of me, though, knew that suicide wasn’t the answer.” His hazel green orbs filled with tears. “But, I took that pain and made it into something else. In a crazy fucked up way, it became my salvation. The pain was the only thing that reminded me that I was alive. I fed on it day and night. Sure, it led to things that weren’t quite positive. Nonetheless, I found my own strange reality and escaped from it.”

  “She hurt you,” she whispered, tearing up quickly, and one fat tear plopped against her cheek. Then, she turned in the seat until she faced him. Reaching out, she brushed a gentle hand along his cheek, and as he accepted her comfort, she nearly fell apart. “I’m so sorry, Christopher. I’m
so sorry.”

  “Sorry for what?” In his eyes, the pain was nearly blinding. “As bad as I want to, there’s nothing that’ll change the past or what happened to me.”

  “No, you can’t change what happened,” she whispered, running her eyes over his face. Sobbing softly, she framed his face fully. “But, you can move on from it.”

  The hot bright tears shimmered in his eyes, and it wrenched her heartstrings further. “What can I do, princess?” he rasped painfully. “Tell me what I can do to kill this rage inside of me. Why didn’t I do anything to stop it? It makes me just as bad---”

  “No, don’t you say that,” she fought back passionately, sobbing softly. “And don’t you even think for one minute that this is your fault. It’s not your fault, it’s hers!” The resentment grew inside of her like a raging inferno “You were a hurt, abandoned young boy, and she took advantage of you, abused you in ways that are criminal.” Her chest heaved uncontrollably. “I hate the fact that she’s been able to beat the system, and heaven only knows how she’s doing it.” She caressed his face gently. “Don’t let her take anything else away from you or deprive you of what’s rightfully yours.”

  “I hate what I used to be,” he confessed, and again, pain laced his words. “If only I could---” As the torture bested him, he closed his eyes, and he fought to find the words.

  “Forgive yourself,” she cried softly. “Please, allow yourself to accept heaven’s grace and know that you’re loved regardless.”

  His emotional dam broke.

  As it did, she pulled him into her arms.

  She cried along with him.

  Tightening her hold, she hugged him close as the hard sobs racked through his body. He crushed her against him, and held her so tightly that she could hardly breathe. But, it was his way of releasing the grueling pain that ripped him to pieces inside.

  “Fuck,” he muttered thickly, pulling free of her, and then wiped the tears from his face. “Damn it, princess, I didn’t mean to unload on you like that.”

  She gently wiped a tear from his face with her hand “Please, don’t apologize.” She smiled at him tenderly. “You have nothing to be sorry for. I think that you’re allowed a free pass. If I recall, there’s a few times when I’ve broken down in front of you. There’s nothing for you to be ashamed about. And two, I’m glad that you opened up to me. You don’t need to be carrying that around in your head and not be able to talk to someone. I’m glad that I’m here.”

  “Thank you.” His eyes burned with something else, and it was a feeling that her heart understood. “For listening, and letting me drop my emotional shit on you.”

  “We’re friends, remember?” she said shyly, offering him a sweet smile. “That’s what we agreed to, right?”

  A half-smile lit his face. “Right.”

  They turned to face the house again, and they were both equally startled at the same time. Now, Crystal stood on the bottom step, aiming a double barrel shotgun straight at the Viper.

  “Fuck!” he swore loudly. “Get down!”

  The fear leapt in her chest as she lay down in the seat as far and best as she could. Breathing fast and hard, she embraced the horror as he shifted in gear. Just as the car accelerated and roared off, a shot was fired in the air.

  It wasn’t until they were out of sight and traveling down the freeway again that she felt safe to sit up. “W---we have to call the police,” she stammered, looking at him wildly. “Where’s my purse?”

  He tightened his jaw. “We’re not calling the police.”

  “What?” she said aghast. “Why not? She just can’t go around shooting at people.”

  “She fired a shot in the air, not directly at us. We call the police, they get her for disorderly conduct…she’ll be out by morning,” he said with disgust. “It’s a waste of taxpayers’ money to even put her in the squad car.” His eyes grew cold. “There’s a long term fix to the hell that she’s dishing out. I know how she thinks. I know how she operates.” He shook his head in disbelief. “While she told me that she’d do it, I didn’t believe her, fool that I was.”

  “What did she threaten you with?”

  “She said that if I ever showed my face there again, that she’d kill me.”

  Her mouth flew open. “That’s a deadly threat, and her actions tonight prove that she’s willing to carry it out. You can’t let her get away it.” She slapped a hand against her leg. “I’m not letting her get away with it.”

  He looked at her fast. “No. Stay out of it. You don’t need to get involved. This situation is between me and her.” His jaw tightened. “She won’t even see what’s coming.”

  “What are you going to do?” she asked hesitantly.

  “Why don’t I just say that things are already in motion? That I’ve already talked to certain people—law officials to be exact,” he hinted carefully, glancing at her fast again. “That direct ammo is being gathered right now, ammo that’ll put her away for good?”

  In the darkness, she searched his face.

  Was he talking about---some kind of sting operation or something?

  “I don’t understand,” she said quietly, and again the fear rose in her. “And I don’t want you to go back to the Den ever.”

  He shrugged. “Trust me. I can handle things. I’m going to stay close. Damn it, princess,” he swore under his breath. “I can’t turn my back on those kids at Drake’s Run. They need my help, and I’m going to do that by being a support system at the center. Before, I didn’t have the finances or the legal connections that I have to do it. Now, I do.” He tensed beside her. “What’s wrong is you having to experience Crystal’s fucking brand of hospitality. She’s going to regret pulling a gun out with you sitting in the car. I’m not putting up with that shit for one minute.”

  She placed a hand on his arm. “No. I don’t want you putting yourself in danger just for me.” She couldn’t tamper her anxiety. “You said it yourself. Things are lawfully in place to handle her. Please tell me that you’re not going to do anything crazy.”

  Staring straight ahead, staying silent, he drove faster. The tense situation didn’t change even as he parked at the curb near her apartment. When he reached for his door latch, she grabbed his arm and stayed him. “No. We’re not getting out of this car until you tell me what you’re going to do.”

  He bit back an expletive. “I told you that I’m going to handle---”

  “No, you’re not going to handle anything.” Narrowing her eyes, she watched him close. “If you think for one minute that I’m going to let you rush back over there and confront her on my behalf, you have another thing coming, mister.”

  “And what are you going to do to stop me?” The humor played in his eyes. “In case you haven’t noticed, I’m much bigger than you. So, kicking my ass is definitely out of the question.”

  She tried to keep a straight face but failed. “I hate you,” she smiled. “You know that, don’t you?”

  “No, you don’t.” His gaze grew troubled and needy at the same time. “Isn’t that the problem for us anyway---the fact that you don’t. Maybe if you did hate me, we wouldn’t be in the predicament that we’re in now.”

  The air became charged between them.

  Now, danger breathed within the safe confines of the car. Not the sort of danger that they’d confronted earlier. No, this was a much personal and directive danger. On impact, with no warning, it’d devour them.

  “Please, don’t go back to the Den,” she pleaded softly, staring into his eyes. “Promise me that you won’t. Do it for me.”

  For a brief second, he hesitated. Then, he relented with a sigh. “I promise. I won’t go back to the Den tonight.”

  “Thank you.” She gave him a longing look. “It’s late. I should be getting inside.”

  “I’ll walk you to your apartment. You know that I don’t like the thought of you wandering around out here alone at night.”

  She smiled. “Naturally, I do.”

  Hours lat
er, lying alone in her bed, she faced the gripping reality. She was deeply in love with him, not a little, but a whole lot. Nothing in the world, wrong or right, would ever change it.

  Chapter 27

  The weeks flew by fast, so fast in fact, that she lost track of them. During that time, her emotional tug of war turned more volatile, and she struggled with her need to do the right thing as opposed to what she really wanted.

  Working side by side with Christopher afforded them with more precious time together. They’d bonded on a higher emotional plateau with her going on to confide in him.

  She’d told him of her need to please her father and everyone else, and how more often than not, she felt trapped. He’d shared some of his most intimate thoughts, even going so far as to talk about his biological mother, Josephine and her struggles with cancer.

  Though they didn’t voice it to each other, and they masked their closeness well amongst family and friends, they secretly held the truth close to their hearts.

  But, how much longer could she do it, she mulled, distracted, staring at Christopher and Alyssa across the room at the Boswell Convention Hall. How much longer could the pretense continue? Seeing him with someone else was already difficult enough, even acquaintances like Alyssa, she thought, trailing a safe distance behind as they wandered towards the rear of the convention hall.

  What would she do when he really became serious about someone? Yet, she had no right to any of those feelings, especially since she was engaged to another man.

  Especially, since on this very night, she was attending her own engagement party.

  She was startled from her silent reverie as her mother approached.

  “I’m so happy for you!” Mildred squealed with delight, hugging her tight, and then she pulled back. Swinging their joined hands, she looked at the mingling crowd. “Everyone seems to be enjoying themselves.” She squeezed her hands. “Just think. In a matter of three months, you will be a married woman. Can you believe it?”

  “No, I can’t,” she said, attempting a wobbly smile, and caught sight of Christopher and Alyssa again. The jealousy nearly rendered her speechless. Still, she managed the words. “It really came up on us fast.”